Arendelle Airlines
by Banana-viking
Summary: High school AU (Elsanna, not sisters). Being the daughter of a pilot of Arendelle Airlines has its downsides. Elsa is once again relocated, this time to finish her senior year on a new continent. However, this is where she meets Anna, the unobtainable redhead who slowly gets a tight grip around Elsa's heart. M-rated for language, adult contents and violence in later chapters.
1. Numb

**Arendelle Airlines**

**Chapter 1 – Numb**

**A/N: Disclaimer, I do not own Disney, or any of its characters. Also, chapter contains time jumps.**

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><p>I have never felt so astonishingly numb. So enchantingly dead inside. I stood kissing him, his hands cramming onto my back, wrinkling my shirt, fingers drilling into my skin, and I felt nothing. It was empty, and emotionless. This was when I realized that I hadn't felt anything for quite some time. My body was neither aroused from the intense interaction, nor did I feel any butterflies in my stomach – not even a tiny rush in my belly, or a slight tingle in my abdomen. My mouth grew dry, slowly running out of saliva. Actually, I was starting to get bored from the same movement over and over again. His tongue toying with mine, in a one-sided game. Our lips barely touched, our tongues playing the dominating parts, and I missed the softness that a kiss could withhold. For a second, I wished I was back in the 7th grade, where kissing didn't involve tongue yet, and it was purely the lips grazing each other. So smooth and soft.<p>

I felt the panic rise when I tried to unchain myself from his arms, and he was unwilling to let me go.  
>"I have to get back to my friends," I lied, practically yelling to overpower the music.<p>

"Just two more minutes," he begged.

"No, I have to get back," my gaze locked with his. He rolled his eyes, and loosened his grip.

"It was nice…meeting you," I said before I turned around on my heels; I didn't even feel the urge to look over my shoulder and watch him watch me leave. He didn't care for my name, and I didn't care for his.

I didn't regret it. The kiss I mean. It was nice to feel wanted. But the essence of it lied within the fact, that the boy didn't want me. He wanted my body; which I took as the dearest compliment. We both knew the terms and conditions of the kiss. No talking. Just pure lust and desire of another hot body grinding against one's own. No, the real essence of the problem lied within me. I didn't feel that lust and desire run through my bloodstream. I only felt the alcohol and the left-over chocolate I had consumed the day before that I wished would clog up my vessels, putting me out of this dispassionate misery.

And there I was, begging to God or whomever, to let me feel again, while tasting the lips of some stranger. Begging to let me fall in love, and let me fall hard. So hard in fact, that I would immediately regret the decision, and instantly wish for the obsession to go away again. However, by the time that would happen, I would doubtlessly have stopped believing in such foolish myths as love. With that in mind, I walked home, feeling perhaps a tiny bit ashamed of my little experiment. However, I couldn't bring myself to care.

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><p><em><strong>The next morning<strong>_

It was early morning when my father received the call. I was standing in the kitchen, brewing coffee for the both of us when I heard him answer the phone with a "Mornin' Mr. DeHeart." He walked around frantically, holding the phone between his ear and shoulder, while trying to finish up the knot on his tie. I leaned over the kitchen counter while stirring in the sizzling hot turbid water, hoping to at least catch a glimpse of my father for once.

"Thank you sir, bye," he hung up the phone, and grabbed his jacket.

"Was that the board?" I asked, taking a tiny sip of the bitter liquid, while offering him the cup I'd made for him.

"Huh?" He said absent-minded, nose buried in his phone, "uh, yes, that was the board. Great news sweetie, they might relocate us." He said this with no indication of excitement in his voice. It was typical of him, dropping news like these over the morning coffee. Just now, he noticed the steamy beverage I was offering him. He took a quick sip, and placed it on the kitchen counter.

"Well, I'm off" he said, heading for the door. I smiled at him, as encouraging as my lips would let me.

"Have a safe trip," I said spritely. He waved over his shoulder, not even bothered to glance over his shoulder to look me in the eye for once. "Bye Elsa," he murmured. The door slammed, and I was left alone in the cold kitchen, with a drink in my hand I purely despised. I took both cups and poured them down the drain, mentally preparing myself for the upcoming chaos. I sighed heavily, and re-adjusted my braid that rested over my shoulder. Then I headed for my room, and started packing.

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><p><em><strong>1 month later<strong>_

Today was the first day of my last year of high school. Sadly, it was already the middle of the school year. My stomach had tied a knot on itself, even though I had been in this particular situation multiple times. I was by far used to it, but it never seemed to get any easier. My palms were sweaty, and I was tense. My father and I had barely settled into the new place (yet another apartment). I was sure it wouldn't feel any homier than the places we'd lived in the past. The sudden change of scenery took some time getting used to. After all, it wasn't every day you made such a drastic change, flying over seas, to start all over in a new place. I was yet to adjust to the ecstatic climate change. It wasn't hot here in the northern states this time a year, but in comparison to Norway – my, until just recently, previous home – this was nothing.

I drove myself to school, spending the previous night jotting down directions. My father was yet again out of town, this time for several days. At least I didn't have to wear my pretentious façade that morning – not until I arrived at school. I looked at the clothes I had picked out the day before. Taking every precaution, I decided to go with something as safe a pair of tight dark jeans. With that I wore a deep purple top with spaghetti straps, and a white cardigan. I put on my black boots, and my thin brown jacket. With that, I was ready, and headed for the door with my schoolbag clutched to my side. Before I exited the door, I took a long look in the mirror. I wore my hair in a ponytail, bangs brushed back. I gave myself a nod of approval.

"You can do this." But my voice was trembling when I said it. _Great Elsa, you can't even convince yourself._

I picked up my schedule at the main office. I was already late for my first period – mythology studies. I couldn't help but think how cliché it all was. New girl, arriving late on her first day, being presented to the whole class. And it was exactly like that. I knocked twice on the door to room 106. With a heavy sigh, and shaky hands I grabbed the doorknob and entered the room.

"Ah! You must be the new girl, Elsa…" the man looked through some files on his desk "Elsa Vinter, right?" I nodded, only just glancing at the man standing by the blackboard. My cheeks felt hot, and I tried avoiding all the gazing eyes – at least 20 pairs – that was staring at me. I hugged my bag closely to my side.

"I am Mr. Octetes, you are late," he stated. His beer-gut was challenging every physical law and limit of the poor belt around his waist. The short man looked at me with gentle eyes. His body was divided into uneven proportions of legs and upper body; whereas the dominating part was his torso (I'd say approximately 30% legs). The man also possessed the most ridiculous goatee beard I had ever seen.

"Please, take a seat." All I could do was nod, as I eagerly scouted for a free spot. Suddenly a hand shot up.

"There's a free spot back here!" A red-haired girl all the way in the back exclaimed. I let out a silent sigh, finally being relieved from the penetrating gazes. As I walked down the aisle of tables, someone from the corner wolf-whistled. All I could do was stare at the floor, trying not to trip over my own feet.

"Damn, she's fucking hot!" A boy announced cockily. He had dark blond hair, and was extremely muscular. The girl next to him rolled her pale blue eyes while muttering "seriously Simba?"

"That's enough kid!" Mr. Octetes called out. I blushed; I was sure my cheeks were flaming red. The boy laughed loudly, as he fist-bumped the red-haired guy with the side-burns sitting behind him.

Meanwhile, I received a death-glare from the girl beside the dirty-blonde body-builder. Her blue eyes were like an angry lioness', ready to rip my throat out. And before I knew it I was tumbling to the floor, tripping over the lioness' leg, which she so gracefully had intentionally extended. I clumsily tried to break the fall with my hands, only ending up scraping them onto the rough surface. My palms stung.

The class cried out in hysterical laughter. My things were scattered all over the floor. All eyes were on me. Everyone was staring. Panic rushed through me. Before I knew it, my vision started to blur from the tears piling up in my eyes. My hands were franticly moving across the dirty floor to collect my items, while Mr. Octetes tried to calm the class. I heard the red-haired boy with the sideburns whisper into the lioness' ear, "now that wasn't very nice Nala." I could have sworn he smiled while saying it. But before I could glance up to see Nala's reaction to the redheads comment, something warm touched my hand. A tanned hand was resting on top of mine, for only a split second. Gosh, I had forgotten what human contact felt like. Every cell of my being stirred under the warm touch. I shivered lightly under the delicate contact. Christ, when was the last time I'd been touched? My mind wandered quickly back to that night in the club, to the boy who'd pinned his strong body against mine. I squeezed my eyes shut, abandoning the memory. I then looked up, and my gaze met a couple of teal eyes. The girl had retrieved her hand far too quickly, leaving me aching for more.

"Here let me help you," the girl stated, while she gathered at stack of my papers.

_Holy…wow!_

I could do nothing but stare at the redhead kneeling before me. She broke my gaze to send a swift, but warning, look up to the boy with the sideburns; however, her eyes seemed to avoid Nala's.

"Ladies, if you wouldn't mind taking your seats – I'm trying to teach a class here," Mr. Octetes' patience was running out. Quickly she helped gather my items. I flushed heavily when she handed me a tampon that had managed to hide underneath one of the tables.

"Uh…here," she said, scratching the back of her head, and handed it to me. Our hands not touching this time. We both got up, and I followed her to the back of the class, where an empty chair was located behind the mysterious redhead. I couldn't help but notice how carefully her hair was braided into two braids under her black beanie. Her jeans were super tight, hugging her figure beautifully, and I had to force myself to break my obvious stare. The girl sloppily dropped down into her seat, while I carefully winded myself into mine, hoping to raise as little attention as possible. _Thank her! _My mind screamed, but it was so quiet, and I didn't want to evoke anymore unwanted attention. Before I knew it, the girl twisted around in her seat, facing me.

"I'm Anna by the way," she smiled, a lovely crooked smile. I couldn't help but smile back, even though it was only a tiny shy simper.

"What's your name?" She asked quietly, obviously not caring that we were in the middle of class. I cleared my throat a tiny bit, unsure where to look. My eyes settled on the empty space above the girls' left shoulder.

"Elsa," I managed to say. "I'm Elsa." Anna smiled triumphantly.

"Ah, she speaks," her smirk growing wider. Anna was about to speak again, but was interrupted by Mr. Octetes rusty voice.

"Ms. Anderson, if you and Ms. Vinter are done chit-chattin' I would very much like to continue with Tyr and the unfortunate event with Fenris, the wolf who…" and with that Mr. Octetes turned distractedly around and started writing on the blackboard, clearly engulfed in the story. Anna didn't initiate contact for the rest of class, but she did turn her head briefly to send me one last smile, before getting lost in thought.

You could easily see the girl didn't pay much attention to the teacher; instead she gazed out the window, tapping her pen lightly on her notebook. Her head was tipping sideways ever so slightly, making it obvious her mind was wandering. Meanwhile, I was trying to avoid the curious and somewhat intimidating gazes from my peers. The girl, Nala, send me a harsh glare just before the bell rang.

As everybody was exiting the classroom, Nala swung her arm around Anna, and rested it on her shoulder. The boy with the auburn hair, Hans I thought I heard someone call him, reached over and grabbed one of Anna's hands, and intertwined their fingers. She smiled at him, but he barely noticed as he was giving the large muscular blonde a high-five. I followed them to the hallway, in the search for my locker. _146, 146, 146…_ I thought as I walked along the wall of metal lockers. _146, ah, here. _I opened it and a thick smell of dust and sweaty shoes hit me so hard I nearly had to waft the air in front of me. At the bottom of the locker door was a Spider-man sticker. He was in one of his standard poses, getting ready to send off a string of web. The hall had emptied out, and I was leaning my forehead onto the cold metal. In a short moment of insanity, I was begging to Peter Parker to just let me through the day without any more trouble.

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><p><strong>AN:** Thanks for the heads up about the messy upload! Sorry for the inconvenience :P


	2. The Royals

**Chapter 2 – The Royals**

**A/N:** I apologize again for the ridiculously messy upload, thanks for being chill about it :)

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><p>As the day progressed, I learned that the school was plagued by a social hierarchy, and as in every other school, social status was the uppermost important aspect of everyone's high school career.<p>

It wasn't difficult to determine the trophic levels in the schools food chain. On top was the football quarterback Simon, or better known as 'Simba.' Apparently, he was a real predator on the football field. Simon was the king, ruling the school, with help from his evil minion Nala who I hadn't seen leave his side all day (and we are talking, throughout chemistry, English _and _history).

I was bitter to admit that the girl was absolutely gorgeous, and she played her part well as self-nominated queen. However, the sneer look of her fake façade, almost send shivers crawling through my body, as if someone was dragging their fingernails down a dry blackboard.

I sat alone at lunch, not in the mood for company, even _if_ someone was crazy enough to place themselves at the same table as me for once. I twisted the cap off my mineral water, and raised the flask ever so slightly.

_Here's to another crappy school-year_, I thought and took a sip.

I watched as Simon and Nala interacted with the large group of people at their overly populated table. Anna was there as well, neatly placed on the Hans' lap. As I sat quietly, trying not to stare too obviously, I didn't know whether to pity, or envy them. They had the school looking at them, as they were some sort of royalties; however, it came with the prize of being narcissistic snobs. _Though Anna doesn't seem to fit that category_, I thought, replaying the smile she gave me earlier._ Oh come on, just because she gave you a smile doesn't make her any less part of their group._ The tardy bell rang and people started to disperse chaotically, like ants in a disturbed anthill, heading to their respective classes. I couldn't help but steal one last glance at the redhead, now with her arm looped through Hans'. _Well, at least she _has_ a group_, I thought.

Later the same day, I also learned I was already quite famous among my peers, by overhearing my peers in the hallways that I was known as the girl who was so overly fond of the floor that she just _had_ to hug it on her first day. When the bell finally rang for the last time that day, I couldn't help but sigh in relief. _First day of school officially over_, I thought. I opened my locker to grab a textbook. In the corner, I saw the Spider-man sticker. Discretely I placed my pointer finger on his hand on the arm that was extended, like a tiny high-five. _We did it,_ I thought to myself a tiny bit superstitiously.

Admittedly, this day could have gone a lot better, but looking on the bright side (if there even was a bright side), it also could have gone a lot worse. Worst-case scenario, I could have called a teacher for mom, or fallen asleep in class drooling on the desk, or any other horribly cliché scenario. However, the vicious glares that I had received multiple times over the duration of the day from Nala worried me.

Honestly, I did not see where her problem with me had arisen, having not even spoken a word to the girl. Perhaps it was just in her nature to be cruel to fresh meat, showing off her dominance, and letting newbie's know their place. With that I received what would be the, hopefully, last spiteful glance from Nala as I entered my car.

I watched as I saw Anna get in the car with Nala, Simon and Hans. Anna was hugging her army-green jacket tight around her body, shivering lightly. Something inside of me wanted to walk over there and hold her, and keep her warm. But when I saw Hans practically stuff his tongue down her throat, I couldn't help but grimace. I turned on the engine and headed home, trying to forget everything that had happened that day.

The apartment was empty when I arrived home. I walked around, placing my keys on the kitchen counter, fidgety walking from room to room. The walls were so white and bare they nearly gave me a headache. It was so empty. Most of my belongings hadn't arrived yet, not that I had many things I held dearly, but I felt even more exposed without them. Suddenly I found myself sitting on my bed. I was still wearing my shoes and jacket. To my own surprise, I felt warm tears streaming down my face. I rolled up onto my side, clenching my arms around myself, around my stomach, which was just a bundle of hurt by now. Exhausted, and totally drained from any energy or motivation, I decided to drift off into sleep, neglecting the upcoming days' homework.

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><p>I was late. Like, really really late. Drifting off without setting an alarm clock probably wasn't my smartest move thus far. Not wanting to make a bad impression by coming late on my second day, I decided I didn't have time to shower. I quickly changed out of yesterdays outfit, and put on a black skirt, and a blue sweater. The sweater was cosy; the feeling of the soft fabric hugging me was somewhat comforting. I quickly brushed through my hair before sloppily braiding it into one braid letting it dangle from my shoulder, brushing back my bangs. Keys in hand and apple in mouth I ran out the door.<p>

The bell rang the exact moment I entered the main entrance. I walked into the foyer, panting from running from the parking lot and up the few steps to the entrance. Still lacking a mental map of the school's interior, therefore wandering directionless around, I scouted for anyone who seemed remotely approachable to ask. A tall boy was standing by his locker. His hair was blond, and his jeans were ripped.

"Hey do you know where room 101 is?" I asked, a bit out of breath. The boy stared at me, brown eyes wandering as they investigated my structure.

"Carrots," the boy stated with a face of sudden of realization.

"Carrots?" I mumbled questioning. He turned towards his locker, suddenly pinching a paper against the metal surface. The boy scribbled something down on his paper. "Yeah, 'carrots.' For my crossword puzzle." He admired his work for a moment, before turning his attention back towards me. The boy wore a black Star Wars t-shirt, supplemented with a leather jacket. He looked me up and down, then he pointed towards me.

"Uumm…?" _Why is he pointing at me?_

"Room 101…._behind _you"

"Oh!" I looked over my shoulder, and room 101 was right there. I blushed lightly, embarrassed of my own ignorance.

"Um, thanks," I said, after having mentally kicked myself, before turning towards my class. I couldn't help but notice the boy following me, and before I knew it, we entered the classroom together.

"Ah, Mr. Bjorgman, how nice of you to join us," the teacher stated. "And you must be Elsa Vinter. I'm Mr. Hawkins, welcome to mathematics. You're late, please don't make a habit of it," he said and returned to the board.

I nodded, mostly to myself, and headed for a space in the back of the classroom. The blond boy placed himself in front of me, clearly annoyed that I'd taken the spot in the very back. _Maybe he usually sits here?_ I looked around; glad to notice neither Simon, Nala nor Hans was in this class. Figuring this was a junior class, it made sense.

There were plenty of perks of having father who was working as a pilot. However, being relocated for the fourth time over two years was definitely not one of them. This had put its painfully deep marks on my grades. Having moved around so much had resulted in being held back in a couple of classes – especially maths. They say math is universal, but having it taught in three different tongues could be confusing at times. Honestly, starting over and over again had made me lose all motivation for learning. It was horrible really, because I loved learning. But on my own premises.

Mr. Hawkins' voice interrupted my thoughts, and all eyes were suddenly resting on me for the second time over the expand of 48 hours.

"Ms. Vinter, do you know the answer?" Mr. Hawkins was gesturing to the equation written on the board. In my mind, it looked like bunch of nonsense with brackets and some letters who had lost their way. _Thi_s_ is _math_ class, get out of here!_ I hissed at the letters on the board. My palms were getting sweaty, and I swallowed hard. Mr. Hawkins could obviously see my distress (which wasn't difficult since I was practically squirming in my seat) and decided shift his attention to another student.

"Anna, let me hear you thoughts," he said while leaning against his desk. It was only then I noticed the redhead with the twin braids. She was sitting in the front of the class. _Wait, is she a junior?_

"I got negative two over three x," she said nonchalant.

"That's correct, good job. Could you come to the board and show us all what you did?" Anna swiftly wiggled out of her seat, and headed for the board. She scribbled all sorts of math stuff on there, and all I could do was watch in awe. How did she make is look so easy? She wasn't even nervous about going to the board, standing in front of the entire class. Finally, she put down the chalk, and turned around. As she did, she managed to lock her eyes with mine, and send me a smile. My stomach churned.

I convinced myself it was the lack of my usual breakfast.

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><p>Lunch was a lonely affair once again. It was only me and my tray of somewhat unappealing and inedible cafeteria food. The odd blond boy from this morning was sitting in the corner with one other. The Bjorgman-dude sat across from another boy, presumably a buddy of his. He had shaggy brown hair, and a handsome face. Both were quite bulky and tall, but not in the same unnatural manner as Simon.<p>

I'd named Anna's table the 'Royals' Table' and both Mr. Bjorgman and his friend seemed to send irritated glances towards the table whenever they would erupt into an insane outburst of laughter. I was pleased I wasn't the only one fed up by the Royals Table's somewhat sadistic behaviour. Nala was making some poor freshman's life miserable, while Hans was stuffing his tongue down Anna's throat once again. The table was practically radiating ignorance and arrogance, and the Bjorgman-dude could barely muster holding back a growl. His buddy across from him tried to calm him, but without success.

The brunet suddenly caught me staring, and I didn't have time to look away before his chocolate brown eyes were locked onto my blue ones. There was something in his gaze, it was so…kind. His messy hair covered one of his eyes. He didn't seem offended by my obvious stare, however, he did seem curious. His eyes were teasing in a sense, challenging me to see who would break the gaze first. He crooked his head, tilting it sideways, like a nosy animal. Mr. Bjorgman turned to see what had caught his friend's attention. His jaw was flexed, but I saw as it relaxed when his eyes settled on my figure. Now both of them were looking at me, and I could feel the blood rush to my face. The blond glanced back at his friend and snorted loudly.

Another outburst of laughter from the Royals' Table made me break the gaze. Instead, I met Nala's eyes, which wasn't quite as friendly. Her eyes were a pale blue, almost grey, in contrast to my icy blue orbs. Her ash-blonde mane framed her face. She clenched her jaw, and gritted her teeth, before sending me a tormenting smile.

It was clear now. I wasn't welcome in her kingdom. She was the queen, and I was the pest. For some reason, I was her target. The tripping yesterday had only been the beginning, I could feel it. It was only a matter of time before she would find another way of making my life miserable. Her eyes said it. Not just her eyes, but her posture, her attitude, her behaviour, her possessive way of acting. Her whole being was screaming power and dominance, and I could read in her hungry eyes that she would not rest until she had it.

That day I went home with an exhausting headache. I rubbed my temples before I stepped in the clutch and twisted the keys. The engine gave a roar, and I drove off.

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><p><strong>AN:** Sorry if the story seems a bit slow in the beginning, it takes some time to introduce the characters :P

I hope you like the characters, I thought it could be fun to make a Frozen/Lion King clash, since both of them are some of Dinsey's most successful.

I _expect_ to upload next chapter Wednesday.


	3. Dreams

**Chapter 3 - Dreams**

She laid topless underneath me. Her knees were clenched tightly on each side of my hips. She was breathing heavily, panting hard from the arousal. I could see the light freckles dusted across the bridge of her nose, the tiny flakes of pigment making themselves noticed in the artificial light shining from above.  
>"Elsa," she whispered wistfully. The uprising heat on my skin caused by her touch seemed to magnify, as my name rolled off her tongue. Her bright red hair was spread beautifully over the bed, wavy flame-like locks draped around her head. Her hands were on my back, tugging me closer, as we nearly laid parallel now.<br>"Anna…" I whispered back longingly. Her turquoise eyes were like fresh morning dew, resting on single blades of grass, I could almost see my own reflection in them. The girl stirred underneath me. Then she lifted herself up, and reached to meet my lips. The contact had my head spinning, and her lips were smooth and soft as they moved on mine. My breath was shaky. Anna smiled, the corners of her mouth quivering upwards just enough for me to feel the grin tugging on her lips. Her eyes fell shut, as did mine.

I opened my mouth and invited her in. Her tongue slipped between my lips, and inside my mouth. It was like a tiny animal, testing the waters, and exploring its new whereabouts. A burning sensation started to rise between my legs, and it almost drove me to insanity. My nails dug into the sheets, grasping and clenching them as hard as I could. I clung hard to the bed, feeling as if I was drifting away. That I was slipping. And I couldn't let myself slip away from the panting girl underneath me, but at the same time I had to restrain myself not to throw myself at her. However, I was losing that battle, and my control was slipping. My hands were on her hips now, holding on with a tight grip. A moan escaped from Anna's lips, and we had to break apart for air. She led my hands to the edge of her pants, and trailed kisses along my jaw. The desire intensifying for every innocent peck.

Something very loud sounded in the background, but I was too preoccupied to care.

My fingers started unbuttoning her jeans.

The sound grew, causing an alertness to rise.

The button popped open, but the sound only grew louder. For a second I thought my eardrums were going to burst. The subconscious response dictating me to cover my ears kicked in. Immediately the excruciating heat in my core vanished, with the abruptness as a flame under water.

I jumped off of Anna, and onto the floor, covering my ears while rocking back and forth like a small child.

"Elsa, what's wrong?" Anna looked frightened, her teal eyes staring at me with concern. The noise was so loud now I could barely think. The younger girl didn't seem to bothered by the macabre sound. My breath hitched, though this time not from excitement, but from anxiety. I looked into Anna's eyes again, trying to find something to soothe me, something to calm me from this abhorrent noise. Only I found that they weren't Anna's eyes anymore.

They were Nala's.

Nala was standing before me, while I was lying helplessly on the ground, with the vulnerability as a new-born lamb. She smiled, revealing a row of pointy sharp teeth. She released an excruciating snarl. I woke up as Nala was jumping with her razor sharp teeth towards my throat.

I sat up, while nearly breaking my obnoxiously loud alarm clock by smashing it with my fist. My shirt was sticking to my sweaty skin, and I rubbed my eyes with the heel of my hands.

_What the fuck was that?!_ My brain was working overtime to figure out what had just happened. _Was that Anna?! Did I just have a fucking sex-dream about Anna?!_ Tears were nearly spilling over by now, and my throat was dry. The Nala part hadn't surprised me. I knew I was stressing about the girl. She was just so…intimidating.

_What is wrong with me?_

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><p>The gym was practically empty at this hour, which usually meant I had pretty much the whole place to myself – of which I preferred.<p>

"Hey Elsa," the receptionist said when I entered, sliding my membership card through the machine.

"Hey Adam, how are things?" I asked. Adam always had the early morning shifts, which meant we nearly saw each other regularly, even in the short time I'd been here.  
>"Things are slow," he replied, boredom evident on his face.<p>

"Still not gotten an answer from the committee?"

Adam had send in an application for the fitness board, applying for the personal trainer job. He was only a couple of years older than I was.

Adam was big. Not just big in the sense that he was a rather large individual. Adam was brawny and bulky, and pretty much the definition of a beast in the gym. The English vocabulary did quite possibly not withhold a unit expressing the amount of spinach that boy must have devoured as a kid. It would probably be considered an understatement to assume he was twice my bodyweight.

"Nah, they're taking their own sweet time those bastards," he managed to put a smile on my face.  
>"Hang in there," I gave him a crooked smile. I utterly believed in him, he was a great coach; he'd even given me a few tips.<p>

"Here," Adam tossed me a vitamin-water, "don't work out too hard." He winked at me before he retrieved to some paperwork.

The next hour and fifteen minutes, all I could think of was Anna and that stupid dream, and Nala's piercing eyes. On the treadmill, in the weight room, during TRX training, and finally at my personal boxing session (by personal I mean me and the punching bag).

Anna was haunting my mind, with that stupid (and extremely cute) crooked smile of hers. She was popping up everywhere completely out of context. Therefore, I decided to start describing things around me as a distraction, starting with myself. I was wearing my black Nike Air sneakers. Other than that, I was wearing semi-high socks, black boxing shorts, sports bra, and a black hoodie. I only unzipped the hoodie when no one else was around. I'd noticed Adam staring, and the last thing I wanted to do was lead him on. Not that he wasn't good-looking – he was. I guess I just wasn't attracted to him. My hands were starting to get sore, even wearing my speed wraps, the contact still nearly ripped open my knuckles. Just throwing the last couple of punches, making sure to release as much frustration as possible as my fists collided with the sandbag, I decided to call it a day. I waved goodbye to Adam on my way out. Then I headed home to get ready for school.

* * *

><p>My morning workout had not had the positive effect I was so desperately hoping for. I was sore and tired, and definitely not in the mood for class. Additionally, snippets from the dream (or was it a nightmare?) last night wouldn't stop playing inside of my head. I could barely look at Anna in mythology studies, as desperately as I wanted to return her kind smile, I simply couldn't look her in the eye. I just sunk deep into my seat in the back of the room, and tried to absorb bits and pieces of Mr. Octetes' lecture. Mythology studies was interesting though, but also somewhat eccentric. Honestly, some of the tales were quite bizarre. Everything from eight-legged horses to the Oedipus complex was just simply disturbing.<p>

However, the various gods in both Greek and old Nordic mythology were fascinating in the way they all had their special talent and purpose. I started wondering what kind of god I would be (in case the sky _should_ suddenly tear open, revealing a grey-bearded immortal, pointing a large finger towards me only to tell me I was the 'chosen one'). I tried imagining myself as Athena or Sif, but couldn't quite see it. I sighed heavily. _Who am I kidding; I'd probably be one of those preposterous ice giants from Nifelheim or something. _

After school, I decided to go to the football field to watch the boys practice. It was the middle of the football season, it was cold but not biting, so practice was held outside. I thought it might provide a distraction from my mind, which was working on unusual overdrive today. At the same time, it gave me an excuse not go home right away and dwell over the homework I wouldn't get done anyway.

I tugged my light jacket closer to my ears as I climbed the bleachers in long hard strides. I stopped when I'd reached almost halfway, giving me a satisfactory outlook over the entire field. On the field, I spotted Simon as he was gathering up the team. They were all wearing huge equipment, including helmets, shin guards and large shoulder pads – all in the schools' signature colour: deep purple. This sport was nothing like anything I was used to. I'd never been introduced to the concept of American football in Europe. _Why is it even called 'football'? The ball barely touches their feet for heavens sake. _

I watched as the players dispersed across the field, getting into their positions. The coach was standing on the sideline, observing his players carefully, probably thinking of all sorts of complicated manoeuvres that could lead to victory for each respective team. The coach blew his whistle. All the players practically collided after Simon had yelled what seemed like just random numbers. He then launched the ball as far as his arm would let him, for one of his teammates to catch, who then ran as if he was chased by an axe murderer.

A figure suddenly slumped down into the seat next to me. I jumped from surprise, and quickly turned to find none other than the busty blond with the big brown eyes and the fascination for cross-word puzzle was sitting next to me. His friend with the shaggy brown hair placed himself behind me, and smiled kindly. The blond however simply stared at me with a look of pure curiosity. His eyebrows knitted together in a look that told me he hadn't quite made up his mind about me yet. The brunet spoke first, making me turn slightly in my seat to meet his gaze.

"Hi," he said. His eyes were so kind. "I'm Sven. This is Kristoff," he gestured to the blond, who still sat and almost rudely stared at me.

"Um, hello," I said nervously. Uncomfortable by the blond's staring, I tucked an astray strand of hair behind my ear, and turned towards Sven. "I'm Elsa."

"We know," Sven said. "You're pretty much all the school has talked about the last two days." I swallowed hard. _Well, this can't be good_. My palms were starting to get sweaty, and I was overwhelmed with an overload of unpleasant emotions rushing through my gut. Sven probably picked up on my body language, and quickly broke the silence.

"Don't worry; most of it is just harmless gossip. Rumours spread fast around here," he smiled again. Sven was big, but not as big as Kristoff. He was built differently, and a tiny bit more slender in his body structure.

"They were right though, she's hot!" Kristoff stated. I didn't know how to react to that incredibly inappropriate statement, luckily Sven seemed to be used to it.

"Dammit Kristoff, you can't just go around exclaiming people are hot to their faces," he said. The blond didn't seem to care though, and plainly just leaned back into his seat, his eyes now watching the players on the field.

"'Vinter' that's an unusual name. Where are you from?" Sven asked, genuinely interested.

"Europe," I simply stated.

"Where in Europe?"

"Scandinavia,"_ wow, Elsa you really are no good at this so-called phenomenon called 'communication'_

"Where in Scandinavia?"

"Norway."

"Oh, cool. So you're like a Viking-chick," Kristoff laughed. I couldn't help but chuckle along, as did Sven. Something in the corner of my eyes capture my attention. Fiery red locks caught my vision, and I immediately knew that it was Anna. She was standing rather far away surrounded by a larger group of girls, including Nala. They were smoking. Anna stood with a cigarette in the corner of her mouth, the smoke rising from the tip, while she was inhaling the toxic exhaust.  
>"We noticed how you were looking at them yesterday," Sven stated. "One of the reasons we thought we would introduce ourselves," Sven said still smiling, not a hint of evil in his voice.<p>

"I guess you could say we're sort of the resistance," Kristoff added with a smirk. "Everyone else seems to be brainwashed by their 'coolness'," he said using air quotes. I was still looking at Anna, but I turned away to look at Kristoff. I noticed he was staring as intensely as I had just a few moments ago. However, Kristoff's gaze seemed…longing, in a sense. I didn't have time to read much into it before Sven spoke again.

"I assume you've met Nala?" He asked.

"Not officially. We had a brief encounter in mythology studies on my first day, but other than that, no." Sven looked at me, and I felt a sense of pity in his gaze. Kristoff started yelling something about an incomplete pass – which I had no idea what meant – and mumbled some foul things about the coach. I didn't pay much attention to him; my focus was on Sven who was still eyeing me carefully, like I was this fragile glass sculpture which could break just by breathing on it.

"I'm pretty sure she hates me," I spoke. Kristoff snorted, "No doubt about that," he said before returning to the game.

"Could you perhaps be just a tad more insensitive you big lug," Sven bit at Kristoff as he wafted a hand across his shoulder.

"Just keeping it real," he shrugged in response.

"But, why?" I asked, utterly confused.

"Nala comes from a super rich family, her father is like this hot-shot in his industry – their family is pretty much considered royalty. And from what I've heard, Nala _always_ gets what she wants. I guess she sees you as competition. It's no secret that you are very pretty, and she's probably threatened by you. Especially after the whole Simon thing," Sven said casually as if it was common knowledge. The boys returned to the game, Kristoff mumbling something about a touchdown.

"What Simon thing?" I asked stupidly. Both boys were smiling now, attention now on me again. It was no surprise that they found the whole situation quite amusing.

"The whole 'damn she's fucking hot'-thing. Nala is jealous as hell," Kristoff spoke teeth bared in a grin.

"That girl have her claws so deep into that boy, it's almost frightening. They aren't a couple, they just have sex from time to time, but Nala clearly can't seem to take a rejection," Kristoff explained. Sven shifted in his seat before getting up and dropping down into the seat next to me. He pointed towards the group of girls where a smog of smoke was resting above them. My gaze followed the direction of his finger, and my eyes were fixating on a certain redhead once again.

"The redhead over there is Anna, she's the only junior who's ever been able to sneak into their group; she's also dating that douche bag Hans," Kristoff gave an annoyed grunt when Sven said his name.

"That blonde next to Anna who looks like she is stoned all the time, that's Alice. Next to her, you have Aurora, insomniac, got in trouble last year for sleeping in all her classes. The hyper brunette next to Nala is Rapunzel, she's not a complete bitch, but can be if she wants to." I sat for a moment, letting the information sink in, my eyes unintentionally observing the group, but primarily resting on Anna. Suddenly Anna seemed to notice my staring. She gave me a small wave after assuring none of the girls saw. I was so caught up in Anna's acknowledgement that I hadn't noticed the boys had gotten up.

"We're going to Taco Bell, come with us," Kristoff practically ordered. He swung his bag forcefully over his shoulder; suddenly making me realize how large he was compared to myself.

"What's Taco Bell?" I asked. Both boys stood frozen for a second. Then they both broke out into laughter. It took them a moment to realize I was serious, but their laughter still didn't die out completely.

"You clearly haven't lived my friend," Kristoff said smiling, draping his strong heavy arm lazily over my shoulder, leading me the direction Sven was headed.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Next update will probably be Saturday or Sunday.


	4. Tutoring

**Chapter 4 – Tutoring**

_This. Is. A. Freaking. Nightmare_.

I was standing in the school's gymnasium. A loud whistle sounded that had my ears ringing, as if the ear-destructing device was conspiring with an undeniable wish for me to go deaf.

"Bring it in girls!" Coach Gothel yelled loud enough to make the vein by her throat pop out like a thin wire under her skin. Her jet-black hair wobbled wildly as she gestured for her students to come closer. People gathered, and I could feel an arm rubbing against mine. I looked up to find Anna's playful teal eyes looking at me.

"Hey," she whispered, smiling. She was wearing a black tee and shorts that were way too short.

"Hi," I said, as my lips quivered with unease, managing a somewhat restrained smile. Her tanned skin was so smooth and soft against mine I could barely concentrate on what the coach was blabbering about in her ongoing monologue.

_Get it together Elsa!_

"Today we're playing basketball. Merida and Belle will be choosing teams," was Coach Gothel's final words.

A girl with fiery red hair walked up next to the coach, followed by a graceful brown-haired woman. They started calling out names and girls slowly gathered behind their captains.

Merida picked me. I was sad to find Anna was on the opposite team. Thankfully, I was not picked last, and I suspected my robust physique had a say on that behalf.

"Grab a pinny ladies!" The coach practically screamed to overpower the gossiping teens. Merida threw a blue pinny at me, and I pulled it over my head. A thick smell of sweat spread to my nostrils like wildfire, and if there was something worse than the smell of old sweat, it was the smell of _someone else's_ old sweat.

_Yuck, is that dried blood?_

Luckily, Nala was on my team, which meant that she was forced, by the unholy laws of the basket-rules, to play alongside with me.

"Vinter, you're playing center," Coach Gothel said to me, and pushed me onto the court. It made sense though; I had a few centimetres on most of the girls, making me most eligible for the tipoff. I stood in the middle of the court… facing Anna. _This isn't fair; I'm several centimetres taller than her!_

The strawberry-blonde simply smirked and winked at me. I couldn't help but smile a tiny bit.

"Ready?" Coach Gothel asked, holding the orange ball in-between Anna and I. We both nodded. She blew her whistle and threw the ball into the air. Anna and I both jumped simultaneously. We were both reaching for the ball, and I saw Anna's shirt parted slightly, exposing a freckled toned stomach. I reached the ball first and tipped it forward to Merida. She caught it easily. Then I manoeuvred around Anna and two other girls, before indicating to Merida to return the ball to me. She passed it, and I scored a three-pointer. We ran back on defence.

Unfortunately for me we were running man-on-man defence. This of course meant that I had to follow Anna everywhere on the court. The auburn haired girl didn't seem to mind, in fact she started teasing me by running back and forth totally unnecessarily. Anna darted from one side of the key to the other. I could feel the sweat lingering on my forehead; Anna however didn't seem to get tired at all or even break a sweat. _Where does she get all that energy?_ Anna stood behind me, she was laughing, and we were standing close now. My butt was almost pressed against her lap. Her mouth came up by my ear.

"Sure you can keep up with me, Feisty Pants?" she said with a teasing voice. Her mouth was dangerously close to my ear, and it sent a shiver through my body. The next second she was gone. Anna's team had scored, and we were all running to the opposite end of the court once again.

One of my teammates passed me the ball, which I quickly tossed to Merida who was wide open. I watched as Merida skilfully dibbled further down the court, when something jabbed me. Suddenly I felt a painful punch to my side, like a shoulder colliding with my ribcage. I fell to the floor and landed on my shoulder. Pain spread immediately, like explosives detonating in the areas of my body that had taken the blow. The wind was knocked out of me, and I was gasping desperately for air. I coughed a few times, heaving for air that didn't seem to want to reach my lungs.

"For heaven's sake you're on the same team Nala!" I heard Coach Gothel shout.

Someone was at my side, a redhead. Unfortunately it wasn't the redhead I was hoping for. Merida was kneeling next to me, trying to roll me onto my back. I didn't try to fight her, but I fought the urge to pull away from her touch, still not sure who I could trust. For all I knew, Merida could be one of Nala's undercover minions. However, Merida was a junior, and my brain strictly took notice of what Sven had said about Anna being the only junior ever to party with the Royals.

"Breathe deep," the girl said. I tried and my lungs finally seemed to be susceptible to the oxygen I sucked in. I stared up at all the faces that eyed me with concern and curiosity. It felt like a million piercing eyes were resting on me, and suddenly it wasn't the jab in my side that made it difficult to breathe.

Anna's face wasn't among them. The space was so crammed. There were so many people. It felt like they were closing in on me. It was suffocating. _I _was suffocating. My hands were shaking. Merida helped me sit up, and I buried my face in my palms.

"Give her some space!" Merida demanded, and people seemed to obey the intimidating redhead. Merida handed me some water, and I sipped slowly, careful not to choke.

"T-thank you."

"Nae problem," the girl said while wafting with her hand like it was no biggie. I looked around catching the sight of Nala and Anna having a serious conversation. They were using a lot of exaggerated hand-gestures, some of them towards me.

Then I felt something I hadn't felt in a long time. Fury. It was bubbling inside of me, wanting out. In fact, I didn't know I still possessed such blood-boiling emotion. For a moment, I had doubted that I possessed any emotions whatsoever, but the adrenaline rushing through me told me otherwise. At the same time, it felt like all my senses had been aggravated, and I could hardly control myself. It was all so overwhelming, going from emotionless to such an abrupt emotional outburst.

I shot up, and took four long strides towards Nala, getting up in her face. In the corner of my eye I could see Anna's eyes following me, gaze full of concern. For a moment, Nala looked frightened, but she knew better than to let me exhibit dominance, and she quickly restored her role as queen with a self-confident smirk.

"What's your problem?!" I almost yelled at the girl. I fought the urge to shove her. _She's not worth it Elsa. Calm down._ For a moment, I felt like I was going to explode. There was so much inside of me that wanted out. It wasn't just about Nala, but I refused to be treated like her own personal punching bag.

"No problem here, Snowflake," Nala said sweetly, smiling tauntingly.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. Merida stood behind me, wearing a face that told me she was ready to back me up if things got serious, but also told me that she wanted me to calm down. Anna sent me an apologetic look while dragging Nala away from me. Nala's didn't break her gaze until Anna and she reached the restrooms. I exhaled loudly. Merida released her grip, giving me two gentle pads on the shoulder before turning around.

The excess adrenaline was now flowing to my head and I became dizzy. My hands were shaky, and my body was warm. _Elsa, you need to control it_, I told myself.

Coach Gothel pulled me aside after class. First, she gave me a warning for my slightly threatening approach towards Nala. I was cussing at her internally, clearly none of it was my fault, and it was_ Nala _that had tackled _me_. Admittedly I could have handled the situation better.

The next thing she said surprised me.

"Come to try-outs after school, I think you'd be a great addition to our team," she practically ordered. I wasn't sure whether it was out of pure fear of Coach Gothel, or because I thought I actually had potential, but either way, after school I headed to the gym once again. Coach Gothel didn't have me do much before practically shoving a jersey in my face.

I somehow didn't feel like I had a choice. What I couldn't make up for in academics, I could make up for in sports. I needed this.

* * *

><p>A week went by swiftly after meeting Kristoff and Sven. They sat with me at lunch every day, and things had seemed to have brightened up a bit. Kristoff and Sven did most of the talking, while I contributed with a few comments here and there. It seemed that the two of them had known each for a long time, and practically finished each other's sentences.<p>

After lunch the following Tuesday, Kristoff and I headed for mathematics. Kristoff was a junior, while Sven was a senior like me.

As we entered the classroom, my eyes once again rested on Anna's petite figure. Anna was yet again sitting in the front, her red hair hanging loose like a waterfall of red draping over her shoulders. I had never seen her wearing a skirt, and it almost made me stop and take in her beautiful long slender legs – though still covered by a pair of leggings, you could make out the muscles along her calves.

Kristoff and I retrieved to the back of the class, and I allowed him to take the spot furthest back as compensation from the first morning we had met. After 50 minutes of what felt like brain-torture, the bell finally rang. Kristoff and I were heading out, but Mr. Hawkins pulled me aside.

"Elsa can I see you for a minute?" Mr. Hawkins asked before I could escape through the door. I stayed behind and watched in envy as the remainder of my classmates left. Mr. Hawkins leaned against his desk, staring at me with his warm brown eyes.

"Elsa your scores came back from the previous test and it worries me to see you're that much behind. I understand you have moved a lot over the past years, and I see how that may reflect on your current scores, but we gotta get those grades up. Especially now that you're on the basketball team. We wouldn't want your grades to cause you getting kicked off the team."

I merely looked at my feet, not taken by surprise by anything Mr. Hawkins had just said. The excessive relocation had definitely put a mark on my report card, and sadly put me behind in multiple classes.

"Therefore I've set up a tutor for you. I asked one of my brightest students, who was very willing to help." I sighed heavily, fighting intensely not to roll my eyes and bold from the room.

_Crap. This is not what I need. I don't need some brainyack to tell me how incompetent I am… _

"Tomorrow after school. Library. Be there," Mr. Hawkins said in a demanding tone, though still eying me gently.

"Fine," I mumbled, and headed for the door.

* * *

><p>I highly considered ditching my tutor session, however, when I thought of the alternative (sitting at home alone cramming over unsolvable math problems, until I would become infuriated enough to smack a precooked dinner in the oven, and devour it over old reruns on TV until midnight), I reconsidered and started to walk towards the library.<p>

When I arrived, barely a soul was present in the cramped space. A few desks were scattered across the floor, hardly enough room to walk between them. I scouted the small space, not even sure who to look for.

"He probably hasn't arrived yet," I mumbled to myself. I walked towards the aisles of books, discovering even more tables located in-between every aisle, providing complete privacy. When I found no one, I decided to place myself at one of the tables out in the open.

Ten minutes passed, my knee was bouncing uncontrollably, and I had read over half of the titles of every book that was accessible to my field of vision from where I was sitting. I snapped out of my trance-like state when as slim figure slid down in the chair next to me. There Anna sat, placing a textbook in front of her on the table. She was wearing her usual black tank, and blue jeans, hair braided with a beanie on her head.

"You?" I announced surprised.

"Me?" Anna looked up, meeting my eyes. "Expecting someone more brainy-looking I suppose…" Anna said slightly teasing, but her eyebrows knitted together into a frown.  
>"No!" I exclaimed, probably too dramatically. "No. I was just taken by surprise, I mean, I didn't expect –"<p>

"Its fine Elsa," Anna giggled at my outburst. Anna looked around, and quickly scanned her environment, her face frowning for the second time.

"Do you want to sit in the more private section?"

_She probably doesn't want to be seen with you._ I nodded while standing, gathering my things. I grimaced when the chair made a high-pitched squalling noise. Anna giggled when she saw my face. My cheeks grew red, and I dreaded the large possibility that I would be making a complete fool of myself within the next few hours. We sat down at the table furthest in the back, completely isolated from the rest of the room.

"Should we get started?" she then asked. I nodded.

We went over what felt like a thousand calculus problems, and nothing seemed to make sense. Anna was patient with me though, never judging my lack of understanding. She said that some people just learned differently, and that was completely okay. She went on about a story involving her father, and how he had tried in vain to make Anna sit down and read when she was younger.

"He used to say I was like a baby on Red Bull, but later he just accepted I just didn't learn that way. I learned by doing. It was years until I could sit still long enough to enjoy a book, but when I first did I never stopped," she was smiling, getting lost in her own story.

Anna seemed to be able to talk for hours. You could see the light lit up in her eyes when she talked about her father. I wondered what it was like having a father who actually took an interest in you. Anna quickly broke that trail of thought however. She suddenly shot me a look that told me she could practically hear the gears turn in my head; she could see how hard I was thinking. I noticed she had put down her pencil. Unexpectedly, she put her hand on mine.

"You tend to fiddle a lot with your hands when you think too much," she said. I looked down at our hands, still touching.  
>"I-I hadn't noticed," I mumbled, not sure whether to be embarrassed.<p>

"Well I have," she stated factually. How could she have noticed? _She barely knows me,_ I thought.

"I've seen you doing it during class sometimes," she said, as if she was reading my mind.

"Oh," my eyes were darting around the room, unsure where to look. Anna seemed calm, trying to catch my gaze. For some reason I couldn't quite look her in the eye, the dream still having left its marks, along with clear inappropriate images in my head.

"Your hands are cold," Anna murmured. I blushed, not knowing what to say.

"Bad circulation I guess," I mumbled, extracting my fingers for then to make my hand into a tight fist. But Anna just grabbed my hand, stretching her palm against mine, before intertwining our fingers.

"This should warm them up," her lips curled up into a smile. The touch send shivers down my spine. I cleared my throat painfully obvious.

"Thank you," I managed to get out. Anna simply continued to smile, and took the pencil with her other hand. She jotted down a series of numbers, obviously not another math problem for me to do. She retrieved her hand. My palm was immediately missing the contact of her warm tanned hand.

"Here's my number, text me about our next session."

She handed me a small piece of paper which was folded neatly. Then she got up, gathered her things and left. She gave me a small wave before leaving. I unfolded the piece of paper, noticing she had put a tiny heart after the digits. Minutes passed. I was sitting in awe and confusion. My mind was racing, thoughts were processed again and again, but I couldn't seem to make sense of them. _She is still one of _them_ Elsa, no matter how sweet she is, _I thought. I looked long and hard at the few digits followed by the loosely drawn heart. It took a while before I swallowed hard, and punched the numbers into my phone.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Urgh, its currently 2:30 in the morning... so, sorry if this chapter is a mess.

Thanks for all the follows/favorites, and the kind support :)

I expect next update to be this Friday.


	5. Gerda

**Chapter 5 - Gerda**

_Thunk!_

_Thunk!_

_Thunk! _

An obnoxious noise continuously sounded, something collided with my door, and woke me. I stirred in my bed. _What the heck was that?_

It was Saturday morning, and I knew my father was out of town. _Thunk!_ Another hit sounded, and I got up, suddenly very awake. The hissing sound of a vacuum hummed from the opposite side of my door. I grabbed the first thing I could get my hands on, and opened the door, ready to encounter the intruder.

"Good morning! You must be Elsa," the short woman standing in my living room said. I said nothing as she preceded cleaning, pushing things out of the way to make room for the vacuum. She eyed me suspiciously, looking at me with a motherly gaze. In one smooth motion, the woman kicked the button on the vacuum, and the room fell silent. Her hair was in a bun, and she was wearing an apron over her green dress.

"And what exactly did you have in mind in regards to that?" She asked gesturing towards my raised hand. I was holding a shoe. _Good going Elsa, killing an intruder with a sneaker, that'll show 'em. _I threw the shoe back into my room slightly embarrassed.

"Um, who are you exactly?" She eyed me, eyes suddenly wide.  
>"Your father didn't tell you?"<p>

"My father never tells me anything really," I answered. She walked towards me, rubbing her hands with a piece of cloth.

"I'm Gerda," she said smiling kindly. "Your father hired me to clean up the place, and run some errands for him while he's away."

I couldn't help but think how typical of him it was not to tell me he hired a maid. Gerda was still standing before me. She had a certain…warmth to her being, not dissimilar to Anna.

I internally scolded myself for letting the girl pop into my head yet again. She was everywhere, and it was starting to become a regular distraction. _Get out of my head…_

I snapped out of it, and returned to Gerda who was eyeing me up and down.

"My goodness girl, you're skin and bones! Let me whip you up something for breakfast, while you go get changed."

I realized I was standing in merely a tank top and a pair of undies. I blushed lightly, trying to cover myself up a bit. Gerda simply laughed while walking to the stove and grapping a pan.

"I'm sure that's not a part of your job description," I objected.

"Nonsense!" Gerda exclaimed, her arms shooting up wafting off my protest. I tried convincing her it really wasn't necessary, but she wouldn't have any of it. She practically pushed me towards the shower and told me to clean up before breakfast.

I realized how long it'd been since I'd actually held a real conversation, meaning, a conversation I had actively taken part in. I couldn't recall the last time someone had cooked for me, let alone taken the time to sit down and talk to me like Gerda did. She told me about her husband, his name was Kai. I learned she had a daughter a year older than me. She was twenty and went to university in London. Gerda was beaming with pride when she spoke of her.

She then asked me a bunch of questions, but I tried to keep my answers short. After I revealed my Scandinavian heritage, she smiled with excitement telling me her husband was also from Norway, and that she insisted on trying out some of her Scandinavian cooking on me. She wanted me to have a taste of home, now that I was so far away from it.

"Does your mother never cook for you?" She asked, genuinely curious, smiling a toothless smile. She watched as my face turned into a frown, and her eyes grew concerned. It had been so long since I'd talked about her, even though I thought about her almost every day.

"She…s-she…it's only my father and I," was all I could say. She decided to leave it alone, sensing it was a sore topic.

From then on, Gerda did most of the talking; she even corrected my table manners by telling me to get my elbows off the table. I complied without hesitation, not even sure why I took orders from a complete stranger. I think it was the way she looked at me. The way her motherly eyes hovered over me, while she was polishing our cutlery. _Wow, it's been so long since I've had a mother. I don't even remember what it was like…I imagine it would be something like this._

* * *

><p>Later that day my father arrived home. He was dressed in uniform, and wearing his pilot hat. We ordered take-out, since I was too lazy to cook. I had taught myself how to cook, since my father was hopeless in a kitchen. We were both still recovering from the time he managed to nearly burn down the kitchen while cooking pasta. Before, I thought it would be common knowledge, but from today's date, I'm still not convinced everyone knows that you <em>boil<em> pasta, not fry it. I wasn't a master chef, but I got by with the basics, even though most nights resulted in bed without supper or frozen food.

When the food arrived, we sat around the excessively too large dinner table. Empty chairs encircled the table, leaving me with a hollow feeling. A feeling that something was missing.

We were sitting across from each other, the table so large it nearly left a two-meter gap between us. It had been so long and I could not remember the last time the two of us had sat across from each other and enjoyed a meal, and when we finally did, I remembered why.

"You look awfully pale," he pointed out halfway through dinner.

"Dad," I rolled my eyes at him, holding back the blast of anger I indeed felt, "I'm just not wearing make-up."

Even though my smooth skin had a natural pale complexion, I always tended to apply a thin layer of make-up. It left my cheeks a bit more rosy than my skin would naturally exhibit, and at the same time it functioned as a mask; a mask that made me feel just a tad safer, a mask I could hide behind.

I didn't know how else to respond. This was a pathetic attempt of a conversation.

"Huh," he then said, and continued eating. His green eyes rested on me for a while.

I remembered making small flashcards when I was younger with conversation topics and starters. It worked as long as I hid the cards in my lap, but I couldn't make do without them. My mind simply went blank – kind of like when I was doing math – resulting in numerous silent dinners.

"How's school?" He asked. His teeth were so aggressively white they nearly blinded me when he spoke. The question caught me off guard; he usually wasn't the one trying to start a conversation. Something was off.

"School is fine," I answered, delicately taking a bite of the dry chicken on my plate. _Come on Elsa, give him something to work with._ I chewed for a while. I swallowed.

"In fact, I just joined the basketball team," my throat was dry. The cutlery sounded loud against our plates.

"Lovely," he then said. "Make sure to tell me when you have your first game."

For a moment, I sat stunned. Would he actually try to make it?

"I-I will."

We said nothing for the rest of dinner.

* * *

><p>The clock stroke eight and I was helping my father clean out the table. I had told him earlier that I would be going to my new friend Kristoff's house to hang out. I wasn't asking for permission, but I always let him know, even when he wasn't home I would leave a note just in case. He had told me it was fine, and to drive safe. <em>You are not going to inspect me? Ask me awful and embarrassing questions about my new friend as any other teenage girl's dad would? Tease me, that I'm going to a boy's house? <em>I snatched my keys from off the counter and slammed the door behind me.

When I arrived at Kristoff's Sven was already there. He was getting cosy on the madras on the floor that was filled with Oreo crumbs, which Sven was so greedily consuming. When he saw me, he scooted over, making room for me.

"Sven you pig, you got Oreos everywhere!" Kristoff said when he returned with some drinks. Sven laughed loudly, placing another Oreo into his mouth and exaggeratedly scattering crumbs in larger proportions over his madras.

"You're disgusting," Kristoff announced. "Elsa take my bed, I'll sit with this swine," he said.

Over the last couple of weeks, I had gotten more and more comfortable around Kristoff and Sven. Clearly the two of them had gotten quite comfortable around me as well. Those two were like the R-rated version of Koda and Kenai (though I wasn't sure who was who), just with way more trash-talk and Lord of the Rings references.

I smiled, taking a place on Kristoff's bed next to the window. Both the boys grabbed a controller, and started a new game. It was some sort of shooting game, and both of them had objected when I said I didn't want to play because I didn't want to ruin their game with my bad gaming skills. They insisted on having me playing, but settled upon the agreement that I would watch the first few rounds, getting an idea of the rules and strategies.

Kristoff argued loudly with the army characters in the game, annoyed when they did not do as he wished. I curled my legs up underneath me, getting comfortable. My phone suddenly buzzed, and I were soon to realize I had received a text from Anna.

**Anna **[20:41]: _I see you ;)_

Before replying, I spend one moment on being confused and assume that this clearly must have been a mistake, and another moment admiring the winking smiley.

**Elsa** [20:43]:_ Are you sure you're not mistaking another stunning blonde for me_?

_Wow, Elsa that was smooth,_ I smiled weakly at my reply as it was sending. _Dammit, I should've put a smiley…_

**Anna** [20:44]: _Haha no silly, youre at Kristoff's place. I can see you through the window :)_

I froze for a second, taking in the text.

She could see me.

At that very moment, she was looking at me. My phone vibrated again.

**Anna **[20:45]: _I mean not in a creepy stalker-kinda way! I just live right across the street, that's all :) _

I laughed at her reply, covering my mouth when I did. Then I looked out the window, and sure thing, there Anna stood by the window across the street in all her glory. She waved at me. I had no idea how to reply. I decided to play to it safe and wave back.

**Elsa** [20:46]: _I see you too ;)_

"Who're you texting?" Sven said in a teasing voice.

"Probably someone pretty special since you're smiling like a total dork," Kristoff added.

"No one, it's just Anna," I mumbled, trying not to make a big deal out of it. They both turned around simultaneously, faces dropping.

"Holy shit, you have Anna's number?" Sven said, half laughing. Kristoff, however, was not laughing or smiling, in fact his face seemed to have faltered a bit.

"Well, yeah, she's my tutor," I answered, surprised by their odd reaction. "Why? Is that bad?"

As soon as I asked, the shrieking uproar of a car coming to hold abruptly sounded as a red convertible stopped outside Anna's house (even though it was way too cold outdoor driving with the roof down). The booming bass blasted and nearly made the windows quiver. Simon was behind the wheel, while Nala was hanging out the window yelling Anna's name in between hysterical giggles. Hans was in the backseat, next to some brown-haired dude. Rapunzel was sitting on the mysterious person next to Hans. Anna came running out her front door, jumping into the car, and landing in Hans' lap. Then they drove off, music blasting at and ear-piercing volume.

"Not particularly," Sven said. He sat for a moment. "Tutor huh? Didn't know the girl had brains…"

"Of course she has brains!" Kristoff said almost hysterically, breaking his trance-like state. Sven simply laughed.

"How would you know? You barely even had a conversation with her!" Kristoff was blushing heavily now, his eyes set focused on the screen.

"I mean, you guys have been living across from each other for how many years now? Eight? And how many times have you talked to her?" I could not tell if Sven was teasing any longer, but Kristoff definitely did not find the conversation funny anymore.

"I didn't know you guys lived across from each other, what's the big deal?" I asked, scared I was overstepping.

"Oh nothing other than he's been in love with her since the seventh grade," Sven giggled.

"Shut up Sven!" Kristoff got up and walked out the door. I felt better when I saw he picked up the empty chips-bowl on the way out, reassuring me that my question hadn't been serious enough for him to storm off without refilling the bowl.

"Damn," Sven sighed loudly, casually putting the game on pause, as if Kristoff's outburst was a regular occurrence.

"He's been in love with that girl for like, forever, too much of a chicken to do anything about it. Don't worry, he'll be good again in ten minutes time," Sven assured me when he saw my worried look.

"You guys seem to know each other well," I said. Sven seemed a bit flattered by the statement. He smiled widely, jumping onto the bed, sitting next to me.

"Kristoff is my bro. I mean, sure we have our disagreements, but we can always count on each other," Sven explained. "We kinda grew up together, you know," he added. My eyebrows shot up, and I tilted my head a tiny bit.

"Really? How so?"

"We were at the same orphanage actually, shared a bunk bed. Kristoff let me have the top bunk. He always stuck up for me when the other boys were teasing me," Sven's eyes wandered, thinking back.

"When he got adopted, I was all alone again. He came visiting all the time though. Luckily, it wasn't long until I found a family of my own, not far from Kristoff. We've been inseparable ever since," I could feel tears swelling up in my eyes. For some reason I found it so incredibly beautiful, and I hated myself for the jealousy that rose deep within me. Sven looked into my glistering eyes, before wrapping an arm around my shoulder. I leaned my head onto his shoulder, letting me comfort. Kristoff then returned with a bowl of fresh chips. He slumped down on Sven's gross madras, and grabbed a controller.

"I'm gonna kick your ass now," Kristoff stated determinedly, as if it was a sure fact.

"I'd like to see you try," Sven laughed. He untangled himself from me, and placed himself next to Kristoff on the madras. I looked at the two, Kristoff giving Sven a friendly shove.

It was then I realized that sometimes blood wasn't a factor. I knew I was looking at two brothers right there and then. I had never seen a stronger bond between two people, and I couldn't help but admire them.

"I think I'm ready to play now," I said smiling brightly. Kristoff slung a controller over his left shoulder, and started setting up my character.


	6. Chaos

**Chapter 6 – Chaos**

Lunch was chaotic, I think that describes it. When the bell rang, students formed in massive groups to walk down the hallway together, all moving towards the cafeteria. Per usual I was the first at our table, since I didn't have anyone to stop and talk to in the hallway apart from Kristoff and Sven. The food looked particularly unappetizing today, so I settled for an apple accompanied by some carrot sticks.

Kristoff and Sven sat down with their tray of disgusting cafeteria food. They were talking about another who-slept-with-who-scandal, that I was too busy to listen to, and least of all care for. I was deeply focused on my calc homework for next period.

Completely lost in the 'wonders of math', I reached for a carrot, and let it dangle in the corner of my mouth. I sat in deep thought, while scribbling numbers down in my notebook.

Anna's tutoring had finally started to kick in; I was actually trying to catch up on my homework. It was a rare occurrence, but for once I felt…motivated. I wasn't sure whether it was because I now had Kristoff and Sven which provided me with the sense of companionship, or if it was because of the tutoring lessons twice a week between Anna and I. The girl had some sort of magical ability to put a smile on my face with her excessive talking. She mostly kept it about math, but sometimes she would get lost in an anecdote about some crazy event (though never involving Nala, Simon or Hans). I chewed on my carrot stick, jotting down some notes, completely lost in thought.

"Elsa you should totally get one of those cute Christmas outfits for the winter formal," Sven said, interrupting my thought-process, with a smug wink.

"Huh?" I mumbled, half paying attention.

"Don't you ever relax?" Kristoff asked while smacking my calc book shut with his massive hand.

"Hey!" I protested, but Kristoff just scooped the book down onto his lap.

Sven picked up his greasy salami-something-sandwich, preparing for a massive bite. All I could do was roll my eyes.

It wouldn't really be lunch if I didn't receive my daily dose of death-glares from Nala and her troops (she had gotten all her friends to join in, except for Anna for some reason). It still sent shivers down my spine, but I felt better having Kristoff and Sven around. They were like my own personal cocoon of protection. I glanced over towards the Royal's table, and I observed that Anna for once wasn't planted on Hans' lap.

My mind wandered to our previous session, where Anna briefly told me about a thing she had today and therefore wasn't sure whether she would make it to our tutoring session. She said she would try to get out of it, and get back to me. _She probably has plans with her douchebag of a boyfriend, _I thought. I couldn't blame her, I'd probably also make up excuses to not hang out with me too. I realized it was bound to happen eventually, Anna not wanting to spend time with me anymore. _It's not like you guys are hanging out, she is your _tutor_. She probably gets extra credit for teaching your sorry ass._

Nevertheless, I decided to text her, assuming she might have forgotten to get back to me.

**Elsa** [12:36]:_ tutoring after school? :) _

The day progressed and I never received an answer. I kept checking my phone every ten minutes, anxious for her reply.

_Why am I obsessing over this?_

I thought twice about it. Over the past week or two, I had grown quite fond of our sessions – maybe a bit too fond. The dream being long forgotten, I could finally look at the redhead like she was a normal human being again. However, something still stirred inside of me every time I looked at the girl, something pleasant. Something I wasn't willing to admit to myself, but I let myself have the pleasure just this one time. The pleasure of her company. The pleasure of her energetic spirit and cute smile. What harm would that do?

I saw Anna walking in the hallway before last period. Her hair was braided into her standard braids, not hidden under a beanie for once. She stood lone by her locker, and I saw my chance. Not thinking, I walked up to her. She was reaching into her locker when she saw me, her face growing into a wide smile… then a frown. Her blue-green eyes became filled with worry.

"So, will I see you after school?" I asked before I could stop myself, clenching my books to my chest.

Within a second, Anna's friends formed a human-wall behind her, hovering over her like helicopters. I saw Hans' devious grin among the crowd. His facial expression made my blood run cold while his green eyes, possessing an abasing look, ran over me once. _Oh, shit,_ I thought.

My jaw tightened, realizing how stupid I had been for walking up to her without checking the hallways.

For a moment, the girl looked perplexed. From the corner of my eye, I noticed Nala sending her a threatening glare. Suddenly Anna's facial features became stern, and she let out an over exaggerated huff.

"Yeah, as if," she spat at me, sending me a look that implied I was worth no more than a jar of dirt.

My jaw nearly dropped to the floor. Laughter erupted from Hans and the others, and Nala wore a satisfied smirk on her lips. Simon was laughing goofily, clapping his hands together like an overly excited sea lion. Hans snapped his fingers and exclaimed "uuh, burn!" before resting a protective arm on Anna's shoulder.

I turned around on my heels and darted the other direction. The gazes of the bystanders around me drilling into my back as I motioned my way down the hall felt like they were burning through my skin. Turning a corner, I finally made it to the girls' restroom.

The tardy bell rang, and the girl's bathroom was deserted. I entered the stall furthest from the entrance, and locked the door. There I stood, leaning against the cold tile wall. For some bizarre reason I didn't cry. Or I couldn't cry. The tears wouldn't flow, as desperately as I wanted them to. Instead, the humiliation locked itself up deep within my stomach, piling up on everything else. _Great. You nearly break down crying in front of the whole class on your first day, but when you finally allow yourself to cry, you can't. How pathetic. _My thoughts were interrupted by a door opening, followed by hesitantly approaching footsteps.

"Elsa?" A voice asked. The footsteps approached carefully, and then finally came to a stop right outside my cubicle.

"Elsa, please, I know you're in there," Anna's voice sounded. "I-I'm sorry about what happened…please let me in," there was a gentle knock on the door. I didn't reply. The door ruffled gently once again, and I imagined Anna resting her forehead on the wooden surface. "Elsa I can see your bag under the door," Anna stated.

"Go away Anna," was all I could manage without my voice betraying me. It was quiet for some time. I heard a heavy sigh, followed by, "okay…bye." With that, Anna left, and I slumped to the floor, finally letting the tears flow.

* * *

><p>I was more upset than I would care to admit to myself. Anna had gotten to me. The worst part was that I had seen it coming, and I wasn't surprised by what had happened. I was angry with myself for letting it get to me this much. Admittedly, deep down, I had hoped that Anna and I could have been friends, even if it was in secret. <em>What did you expect Elsa?<em> I exited the elevator as it reached my floor. I couldn't wait to get to my room and slump down on my bed, forgetting the whole day, at least until I would have to wake up and face reality.

As I entered the front door, I was met by the smell of beer and cigars. Noises came from the living room. Loud manly laughter filled the entire apartment. Hesitantly I entered the room, still wearing my jacket and boots. The room fell quiet for a little bit as I entered, and I was greeted by a small crowd of full-grown men, puffing on their cigars.

"Elsa, you're home," my father said with a flat voice. _What a great observation_, I thought. I hadn't expected him home this early.

"You remember Karsten from Denmark, and Klaus from when we were living in Germany, right?" My father gestured to the two men sitting across from him.

"Det er godt at se dig Elsa. Du er blevet stor," Karsten said while running a hand through his ashy blond hair. I looked into his pale blue eyes, giving a polite smile.

"Det er også godt at se dig," I lied. I bade them goodnight before retiring to my room. No homework got done that night. I could hear the happy laughter from the other room, my father's being the loudest. Each of his chuckles cut deep into my soul. It hurt.

* * *

><p>A couple of days had passed since Anna and I last had spoken. She had texted me a few times, most of them containing apologies, and others asking if I wanted to meet up for tutoring. Kristoff and Sven of course knew the story (hardly five minutes after it had happened). News travelled quickly.<p>

It was almost at the end of the day, and I was standing by my locker, retrieving some books. I shot a quick glance at the Spiderman sticker, letting my fingers run over his smooth surface.

The tardy bell rang. It only felt like seconds before the actual bell rang, and I still stood by my locker, not really caring. I was trying to gather courage to get through the rest of the day so I could go home and crash on my bed. Finally, I decided to go to class, realizing how late I actually was.

As I turned the corner, a hand suddenly grabbed my arm, and pulled me violently into what looked like a janitor's closet.

"Hey! What the–" I shrieked. But before anymore words could come out, Anna had already slapped her palm over my mouth, raising her finger to her own in lips in a _shh_. She closed the door behind us, and let go of me completely, as if I was a piece of hot metal burning her skin.

"Anna, what are you doing?!" I hissed, still taken by surprise.

"Well, I wanted to apologize for what I said, but I've barely been able to make eye-contact with you since!" Anna hissed back, her hands clenched into fists. She locked her eyes with mine, and the tension rose, you could nearly cut it with a knife. Anna's jaw tightened, her lips pressed together forming a thin line.

"Fine! You've apologized, may I leave now?" We stared at each other for a few more seconds before I turned towards the door.

"Elsa…please don't leave," my heart dropped to my stomach by the sadness in her voice.

Finally, I turned towards the girl. Anna's hands were buried deep the pockets of her jeans, she was biting her lip. She looked nervous. I could see the hurt in her eyes. I crossed my arms over my chest, clenching my arms around my upper body, trying to hide how insecure and vulnerable I felt at that moment.

I was angry, but mostly angry with myself. Anna could ask for the whole world, and I would give it to her. I couldn't be angry with her, not when she was looking at me the way she was looking at me now. The younger girl was still looking at me with her intense turquoise eyes. They were mesmerizing. I took a deep breath, before exhaling noisily.

"Alright, spill." The girl looked at her feet, a hand coming back to scratch the back of her head.  
>"Look I'm sorry for what I said," she started, "I feel horrible about it. Suddenly Nala and Hans were just hovering over me, and I panicked. Nala doesn't like me talking to you, obviously. I know it's no excuse. If I'd just seen your text, I would have replied, and this wouldn't have happened. Elsa, I'm truly sorry, I didn't mean to treat you like shit, and especially not in front of all those people, and I wish I could take it all back–" I was impressed she managed to verbalize all of that in one single breath. The girl looked like she could go on and on forever, so I decided to end her misery.<p>

"Anna, its fine. You don't have to apologize," I interrupted.

I tried to smile at her, reassuringly.

"I forgive you." With those three words, I could see Anna's shoulders drop from her ears, followed by a sigh of relief. She was smiling at me, her usual crooked smile, and my heart nearly melted. I had to look away, her gaze simply too overwhelming. I looked at my feet, and my hands came down to smooth out the imaginary wrinkles on my skirt. The closet was dark, but I could still make out Anna's flaming red locks. It was like the colour of a sunset, or a fire slowly burning out.

Her teeth were bared in a wide grin now. Her energetic spirit suddenly filling the tight space, instead of the tense and guilt-plagued one that had rested upon the younger girl only moments ago.

"Do you wanna come to my house on Friday, and have the session there?" Her hands came out of her pockets now, only to place them in the pockets of her green baggy jacket. It suited her well, even though it probably was a size too big.

"Yeah, that sounds great," I said, once again back to my awkward state. Anna took a step forward, leaning towards me. She was close now, our faces only a few centimetres apart. I could make out the light freckles sprinkled across the bridge of her nose. Her scent filled my nostrils, she smelled like summer. It was a natural scent, and could perhaps be described as the vague mixture of peaches and honey.

"Well, I assume you know where I live since you've been to Kristoff's," she said, reaching for the doorknob behind me. As she turned the knob, I noticed her eyes fell to my lips. Mine accidently fell to hers as well. They looked so soft in all their pinkness. She bit her lower lip before pushing the door open. Anna moved pass me, peeking her head out of the closet. We parted with a shy goodbye, and a small wave. As I walked to class, my head was filled with what had just happened. My mind was too preoccupied to even worry about the punishment awaiting me for being late.

* * *

><p><strong>Translation:<strong>

_Karsten:_ "It's good to see you Elsa. You've grown"

_Elsa:_ "It's good to see you too"

**A/N:** Hello lovely people! Thank you so much for all the follows/favourites and kind reviews! Feel free to share your thoughts!

Chapters will slowly be getting longer, and the story will kinda soon pick up some pace!

The rejection-scene is slightly inspired from the movie 'A Walk to Remember'… if anyone was wondering…


	7. Feels Like Home

**Chapter 7 – Feels like home**

It was Friday, and I had just pulled in outside of Anna's house. I passed through the front yard, and stopped in front of the humble home. Something lit up inside of me. It was like warmth, but not like a spark that ignited. No, it was softer and more delicate than that. It was as if the warmth was spreading slowly throughout my system, like a wave of fire, calmly travelling through my bloodstream.

It felt like home.

A real home where all the people living there fitted together, like a puzzle. And I wanted to be a piece in that puzzle so badly.

I rang the doorbell, my knees shaking underneath me. The door opened, and there stood a tall, slender, brown-haired woman. Her hair was tied up into a bun, and her bangs hovered elegantly over her eyes. She had the friendliest smile, not like one of those fake smiles they give you at the supermarket to compensate for their bad service, but an actual smile.

"Hello, Mrs. Anderson, I'm –" I held out my hand, waiting for her to grab it.

"You must be Elsa!" She said happily, and pulled me inside. I was speechless for a moment, unprepared for the incredibly warm greeting. She had the same kind and teal eyes as Anna.

"Anna told me you were coming, she's in her room," she even had the same warm spirit as Anna. The older woman led the way down the narrow hall, to the farthest room in the house, completely isolated from the rest of the house.

"You have a lovely home," I said to Mrs. Anderson.

And it was. It smelled like home-cooking, freshly baked cookies and hot chocolate. The fireplace in the corner was lit, not because it was immensely cold outside, but it coated the living room with a cosy atmosphere. The walls were covered in all kinds of artistic pictures and some family portraits in between here and there. They even had vinyl records from the mid-80's framed and hung on the walls. I stopped to admire an original Rolling Stones track. It warmed my heart to see how worn out it was, covered in multiple scratches.

"You like The Stones?" Mrs. Anderson asked curiously, folding her arms over her chest, a smile creeping upon her lips.

"Love them," I said, and her smile widened.

"My husband gave me that record on our first date," she said, her mind playing her the memory.

I knew parents were supposed to be lame and all, but so far, I had come the like Mrs. Anderson. She reminded me of my mother; well the faint memories that I had of her at least - thankfully, Anna had had two parents taking care of her. That was all anyone could ever wish for. Perhaps maybe a sibling or two, then life would be perfect. I wondered if Anna had any siblings.

Mrs. Anderson twice knocked on the door to Anna's room before opening it. Anna was on her stomach, lying across her bed, her face buried in a book, and earphones covering her perfect ears, which were usually covered by her even more perfect braided auburn hair. She looked up as we stepped into the room; she smiled and closed her book.

"You girls have fun," Mrs. Anderson said before exiting. "Good meeting you Elsa." She send me a final smile. I could really see she meant it. Anna got to her feet, and placed the book on a large wooden bookshelf. I looked around, while Anna put my bag in the corner of the room.

I knew being with Anna, in her house, was going to breath-taking – but I'd never imagined anything like this. Her room was so fascinating; I suddenly had the urge to go exploring as if it was an undiscovered island. It was… unobtrusive, in a sense. Definitely not what I'd expected.

Nala seemed like the girl that instead of wall would have mirrors plastered to every wall, so that she could see herself from every possible angle. The only empty spots on the walls would be covered in completely irrelevant celebrity sensations. Of course, Nala wouldn't own a book that wasn't essential to buy for her classes, nor would there be room, since her walk-in closet would have taken up all the available space for that kind of stuff. Her bed would be covered in much too bright multi-coloured pillows, matching her so intensively pink – the kind of pink that makes your eyes scream – plastic chair.

Anna's room on the other hand, was nothing like that. She kept it in more earthy and calm colours; she even had a light-chain framing the only mirror in her room. Books were everywhere. Paper bags to hard covers, all with a cracked white line down their spine, was stapled from floor to ceiling.

The feeling of shame came across me. Anna wasn't the person I thought she would be, and I'd judged her by her cover.

"You should take a picture, it lasts longer," she teased, her usual smile spread across her face. A blush flowed to my cheeks, but I was still in awe, my eyes flicking across the room. Anna said something, but I was too engrossed with drinking in my surroundings to listen.

"Elsa?" She asked when I obviously forgot to respond to a statement or question I accidently overheard. I snapped out of it and met her gaze.

"You alright?" She then asked, she send me a worried smile, her brows knitted together.

"Yes!" I said, perhaps a bit too eagerly. "I mean, sorry. I'm just kind of fascinated by your room I guess," I admitted.

"Not what you expected, huh?" She said with a knowingly smirk. I sighed and nodded embarrassed, and ashamed of my shallow assumptions.

"Can't blame you," she said. "It is natural for the mind to fill in the gaps and make quick assumptions even with the lack of detail," Anna said as reciting from a book. I grinned, and so did she. For a moment, there was this silence between us. I cleared my throat.

"So, have you read all these books?" I gestured towards to the massive amount of literature carefully stabled along the wall.

"Ha! I wish. It's a work in progress. With school and friends I don't get a whole lot of spare time to read," she said.

She told me about some of her favourite books. Anna was very vivid in her explanations, using hand gestures and words I didn't even know existed to describe some of the characters. Her absolute favourite was some old fairy tales by Hans Christian Anderson. Having lived in Scandinavia and being half Danish I of course knew the one's she was talking about. Anna was utterly thrilled when I told her about my heritage. We talked for a while, becoming more and more interested in each other.

"Do you have a favourite book Elsa?" Anna then asked, while neatly placing one of her precious books on one of the shelves. Her delicate touch showed just how much she valued the small stacks of paper.

It was no secret that I unfortunately didn't read much, and I wasn't going to make up some foolish lie about how some tale written in old English was my favourite piece of literary, since I was certain it would come back and bite me in the tail. I refused to be cliché and arid by claiming my favourite piece of literature was _The Catcher in Rye_, and _Twilight_ was definitely also a no-go. So I decided to be honest. One piece of writing did seem to stand out in my mind, at least among the few I had read.

"I do," my voice was small, a fresh bloom of red forming on my cheeks. This was very personal, maybe too personal even. But for some reason, I actually wanted to share it with Anna. Her room felt like a sacred place, a place where it was safe to be who you were. Like Anna. By showing me her room, she had opened up to me, exposed herself, letting me peak into her small personal cave. The least I could do was to let her have a tiny look into my mind, as a trade.

"It's called _The Brothers Lionheart_. Have you heard of it?" My eyes lit up, suddenly intrigued by her interest.

"Vaguely," she commented, "it's a children's book, right?"

"Yeah. It's about these two brothers' adventure in the life after death. It's written by a Swedish author, Astrid Lindgren. My mother used to read it to me when I was younger," the thought made me smile.

I could loosely recall my mother sitting by my bedside, imitating the voices of the characters. She read with such enthusiasm, always using such dramatic voices. Her blue eyes were filled with life, and would watch my reaction warily whenever she looked up from the page. I remembered her blonde locks dangle over the pages, before she would tug them behind her ear. When the story would take a turn for the worse, and the dragon would announce its presence, I would climb onto her lap, and bury my face in her hair.

"So you speak Swedish as well?" Anna asked wholeheartedly curious.

"No, only Norwegian and Danish. My mother was Danish, er, s-so she taught me," I answered. "I also speak a tiny bit of Mandarin from my time in China," I stated, unsure whether it sounded as if I was bragging. _I wouldn't want to sound arrogant, especially not in front of the smartest girl at school._

"Where's your mother now?" She asked, clearly having picked up on the 'was' part. My gaze fell to the floor, annoyed that I suddenly could not look the girl in the eye anymore, even though I was quite proud of not having looked at the floor or over her shoulder since I arrived. Anna noticed my silence, and took it as a sign.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to intrude," her face exhibiting a bit of guilt for bringing up the topic. I hated being the person to put that look on her face. I wanted Anna to smile forever.  
>"No, it's completely fine… you're allowed to ask. I-It's a fair question…" I mumbled, afraid my voice would betray me.<p>

"She left when I was six, haven't seen or heard from her since," I said. The last few words hurt more than I expected. Anna saw the desire to change the topic in my eyes.

She asked about all the different countries I'd visited or lived in. About the different people and cultures I'd experienced. She was so caught up in everything I had to say about every different country she brought up. She was actually _listening_ to me. It felt great. Somehow, it felt greater just knowing that it was _Anna_ that was listening. I told her about all the different schools I'd been to. How there had been a certain language boundary, but luckily, most of the schools had had an international programme.

"It all sounds so exotic," Anna responded. "I've never even been on an airplane," she stated, sounding admiring. She fell quiet for a moment; I could see she was thinking.

"Hold on, if you've spend six months in Germany, two years in Denmark, eleven months in Beijing…" Anna was doing calculations in her head, her eyes wandered to the ceiling, while adding up.

"Elsa, how old are you?" I froze. I usually tried to avoid the fact that I was a two-year senior, still far behind on my academics, with no real plans.

"I'm 19," I said embarrassed, knowing that most people here graduated when they were eighteen. Anna read my expression, and quickly laid a hand on my knee.

"Elsa, that's nothing to be ashamed of. So you're a little behind, so what? I've never met anyone who's travelled as much as you, and I'm sure you're way smarter than half of the morons at our school," Anna said gently. "You just got to know your strengths, and work on your weaknesses." I hadn't realized I had been clenching my jaw, but as soon as Anna had said that, I felt more relaxed. Suddenly and hour had passed, and we realized we had completely neglected the true purpose of why I had come. We decided to get started.

Anna went to her desk to grab a few textbooks for our session. Some of the books slid from the counter and down on the floor. We both bend down to collect them. As we reached for the same book, our hands touched. At the precise moment our hands touched, I noticed a tiny snowflake landing on the window above Anna's bed. It quickly melted, but was soon replaced by another completely unique one. Soon snow was drizzling down from the sky, so peacefully, each snowflake swaying in their own little dance as it fell to the ground. _A bit late for snow…? _I wondered. She looked at me and smiled, but continued causally picking up the books, while I was stuck in the motion forgetting what I was doing.

Luckily, the door smacked open, and a young boy ran into the room. His hair was dark brown, with a hint of redness that appeared when light shone upon it, eyes the same teal colour as Anna's. Contrary Anna, his skin was snowy white, a bit more like Mrs. Anderson's.

"Olaf! Learn to knock!" Anna blurted out.

"Sorry! Mom says dinner's ready soon! Who's that?" He asked eagerly, pointing towards me.

"This is my friend Elsa," Anna said, less annoyed than before. In two jumpy strides, he stood in front of me, taking one of my hands. The boy barely reached my waist. He smiled brightly, revealing two pearly white front teeth. _Wait, did she just refer to you as her_ friend_…?_

"I bet you are the nicest, gentlest, warmest person eve-" he said leaning his head back to reach my gaze.

"Olaf, that's enough," Anna interrupted with a sisterly tone. Then he ran off, darting out the room and sprinted down the hallway with arms stretched out to each side while making airplane sounds.

"Sorry about that, that's my little brother Olaf. He tends to get a little over stimulated sometimes, we're working on that." I had never pictured Anna with a younger brother. Looking at her now, I could see her as an older sister. I somewhat always wanted a sibling. Someone to share things with. Like talking about your parents for instance.

"Would you like to stay for dinner?" Anna asked, looking at me hopingly. _You have no idea…_I thought.

* * *

><p>I sat across from Anna at the dinner table, Mrs. Anderson on my left and Olaf on my right. Olaf was sitting up straight, his hands resting in his lap; he was clearly fighting the urge to throw his arms up in the air as he was talking about his soccer practice he had had earlier that day.<p>

"Do you play soccer Elsa?" Olaf asked eagerly, looking at me, as I was some sort of superhero.

"Unfortunately no, I _do_ however play basketball," I tried. Admittedly, I wasn't very good at interacting with kids. Honestly, I would fear a child started crying, because I would have no idea how to comfort them. Or comfort anybody for that matter.

"Right! Congratulations on making the team Elsa, I'll make sure to cheer on you in your first game," Anna said excitedly. I forced myself not to let my nerves show. _First my father and now Anna? This game is going to be the end of me._

"T-thank you Anna," I said with a forced a smile. Luckily, Mrs. Anderson swooped in and changed the topic, not sure if for the better.

"So, Elsa, I hear you and your father has just moved here from Norway?"

"Yes Ma'am," I answered as politely as I could. I straightened my back.

"And what does your father do?"

"He's a pilot; he flies for Arendelle Airlines." Mrs. Anderson raised an eyebrow. Arendelle Airlines was a quite prestigious airline service, and my father's aviator title usually caused some interesting reactions, mostly because of the authority status followed by the job.

"How do you like it here? Have you settled in?" She asked, pouring some peas onto Olaf's plate. He looked at them with repulsion. I looked at him, trying to catch his gaze. Olaf looked back at me as I shovelled a mouthful of peas into my mouth, trying to send him an encouraging expression. He mimicked my action, though with a frown. Anna raised an eyebrow at me, suppressing a laugh.

"Well, it's very different from anywhere I've ever been," I admitted, returning to Mrs. Anderson's question.

"It's a good different," I added quickly when I saw Anna's curious face. She took a sip, eyeing me over her glass of water.

"I think I could really come to like this place," I said looking Anna in the eye.

* * *

><p><strong>Important AN:** Hello amazing people! Good news and bad news...

Bad news is that updates may become more irregular since I'm going to Thailand for a few months.

Good news though, is that most of the story is already written! To be honest, this chapter was one of the first ones I wrote (I don't work in chronological order, sue me)… So fear not! The story is around 30 chapters, give or take :) Though, this will probably mean instead of updates every 4-5 days, it's probably going to be once a week, maybe every 6th day. HOWEVER! This depends on internet connection of course! I have no idea how much access I will have to the internet down there, so please don't kill me if I fail to meet deadline once or twice…

Oh! And btw… two more chapters ;) ….


	8. Date

**Chapter 8 - Date**

Kristoff was missing at lunch the following Monday at school. The odd weather had passed, and the temperature was back to normal. It was a bit chilly, but a light jacket would do.

After dinner at the Anderson's, Anna and I had gone to her room to finish some homework. For once, I showed up to class prepared. I couldn't help but enjoy the sense of accomplishment I felt as Mr. Hawkins had send me a proud smile when I could answer the question on the board.

Things were slowly starting to fit into the right places, and I felt more relaxed than I had felt in a long time. I finally had friends. Two wasn't much (well, almost three. Anna _had_ referred to me as her friend) but it was enough for me. School at the moment was to overbear, and I didn't feel like I was suffocating as I usually did. And my father was out of town for a few more days. A few more days of peace and quiet. I could feel the tension in my body whenever I thought about my father's return. I would often feel the headache creep up a day before his arrival. I couldn't relax around him. I couldn't be myself.

"Where's Kristoff?" I asked, sitting down next to Sven who was taking a sip of his juice box.

"Oh, he had a chemistry lab to make up for." It was rare the two of us got a chance to talk privately at school. It was nice for a change.

"So," Sven started, "how was your study-date with Anna?" I could feel the blood rush to my head and my palms became sweaty. _There's nothing to suspect, so relax!_ My mind yelled. _Anna is straight. _You_ are straight! _

"It was fine, she's really not that bad," I said. Sven snorted, and ran his hand through his hair. "Yeah right, she's as much of a bitch as the rest of them, that's for sure." I nibbled on an apple, tearing off the green vitamin rich skin piece by piece.

"She really isn't that bad," I persisted. "Haven't you noticed she's the brainy of the bunch? She also dresses a lot nicer," I mumbled the last part, not certain how specifically I could go into detail about Anna without seeming obvious.

"Oh, come on Elsa! That bunch has done nothing but make your life miserable since you got here. Nala has been after you from day one! Don't tell me that you've already put that behind you, and grown sore on your old days." Sven had a point. Nala had really gotten to me the last few weeks, and although Anna didn't have a say in it, she didn't stop it either.

"Look. All I'm saying is that Anna is not like Nala."

"No, she's more like her clever evil assistant," Sven laughed. I decided to settle upon Sven's accusation. No need to defend Anna any further (especially since she'd never defended me).

"So, how was your Friday night?" I asked, for once curious.

"Nothing special. We went out, but it started snowing so Kristoff bailed – met a girl," he said completely nonchalant. I imagined Sven going home with a girl. A thing he typically did, but it rarely seemed like a big deal to him. Not that it was any of my business, Sven was a big boy, and could take care of himself.

"Yeah, weird weather," I mumbled, not wanting to get into the whole one-night-stand thing with Sven. He eyed me carefully, deciding whether to pick up on my obvious attempt to change the topic.

"You're allowed to ask, you know," Sven commented. I wasn't sure if I was ready for such intimate conversations with Sven – with anyone really. "I don't mind," he said smiling warmly. "Isn't that what friends are for? To talk about the stuff you don't talk about with others?" he continued.

"Yeah, I guess," I agreed. Sven's chocolate-brown eyes rested upon my face. He looked right through me, I could feel it.

"So why don't you?" He played with the fries in front of him, before throwing one into his mouth, chewing while waiting for my response.

"So why don't I what?"

"Talk?"

"I do talk," I mumbled, knowing it probably wasn't as true as I wanted it to be.

"Oh please Elsa, I know close to nothing about you," Sven snorted. I couldn't put a finger on it, but there was something about Sven. He had this ability to approach serious matters with a sense of humor, and an open mind. It was truly admirable.

"Okay, fine. What do you wanna know?" I threw my hands up as I spoke, as a sort of surrender. He looked around, surprised by the sudden privilege to ask. He sighed heavily, thinking hard. I took a sip of my juice box, waiting in angst.

"Gee, I don't know," he started truly out of a question to ask. "Are you a virgin?" I nearly choked on my apple juice, coughing desperately to free my airways from the sweet fruit drink.

"What kind of question is that?!"

"What?! It's a valid question," he laughed.

I blushed heavily, really not comfortable with such private matters as sex. Call me a prude, but I honestly had no desire to share intimate details about my sex-life in the middle of the cafeteria. Sven's grin only grew wider, and he laughed loudly. I looked around to see if Sven's laugher was drawing attention to our small table, but luckily everyone was so caught up in their own conversations to even notice Sven's outburst. It was quiet between us for a while beside Sven's chuckles, obviously not trying to supress how amusing he found my awkward approach on the topic. He was finally done laughing, and took another sip of his juice box, for then to stuff some more fries into his mouth.

"You're a virgin, right?" He asked in a more serious voice, however, with his mouth full of fries.

"What makes you think that?" I wasn't sure whether I was maybe a tiny bit offended. Had he just assumed I was a virgin by the sheer look of my appearance? He thought long about that one, until he finally confirmed my theory.

"I'm not sure how to put it… you just seem so innocent… you also dress a lot in white. And I couldn't imagine any dirty stuff going on in there," he pointed a finger towards my forehead, slowly pressing the tip of his finger between my eyebrows.

I sighed heavily, annoyed with his shallow observations. He'd labelled me the same way I had labelled Anna. I thought back to her room, and the way the space had unfolded Anna in front of me. A pang of guilt rose up inside of me as I thought about it. I adjusted my ponytail, and smoothed out my skirt before I started to collect my things from the lunch table. Sven looked confused as I gathered my books, and grabbed the remainder of my apple.

"As you said," I got up, and pushed my chair in. "You know close to nothing about me," hugging my books close to my chest, I turned around to walk away. However, before I started walking, I turned my head to look over my shoulder directly at Sven. His eyes were filled with confusion, and perhaps a bit hurt… maybe it was guilt?

"And for your information, I am not," I stated, and then I left.

I wasn't angry or mad, not even hurt. It was an escape. Of course, I was disappointed that Sven could be so shallow-minded, but merely three days ago I'd done the exact same thing. However, the question hadn't actually bothered me, but I was afraid. I was afraid that Sven would dare to start asking much deeper and more personal questions. Perhaps the next would involve my father, or maybe even my mother; I wouldn't know what to say.

* * *

><p>My feet let me to my locker, as my mind wandered. It was Thursday. The hall was crowded, and I tried looking at my feet as I walked, just to ensure I wouldn't get eye contact with anyone – and by 'anyone' I mean anyone from the Royal's table. I didn't want to risk bumping into Anna either, since she would most likely to be accompanied by Hans, or even worse, Nala. I reached my locker, punching in a pattern of digits on the lock, for then to swing the door open. I discretely high-fived Spiderman – a now common, and perhaps superstitious, ritual of mine to ensure his protection.<p>

"Hey Elsa!" _Oh gosh, what does his want_? Simon came strutting towards me at a hasty speed.

"Hey, listen…" he started. _Oh no, he's going to humiliate me in front of all these people_. I considered making a run for it, but my legs wouldn't respond. I stood frozen, dreading the fact where everyone around us would start laughing, and point fingers at me. _Please Spiderman, do something,_ I thought. I swallowed hard.

"I was wondering…" He scratched the back of his head. _Here it comes_…

"Do you wanna go out sometime?"

"W-wait, what?" My jaw dropped. I felt numerous eyes rest upon us, probably all wide from shock. Simon cleared his throat.

"Do you wanna go on a date with me?" He said in a humble tone. I still couldn't grasp the words that were thrown at me.

"_You_ want to go out… with _me_?" He nodded once, before sending me one of his million-dollar smiles.

I don't know why I agreed.

It all happened so quickly. Maybe it was his puppy-dog eyes, or the way he nervously buried his hands in his pockets. Perchance it was because of the rush I got for being noticed. Noticed by someone other than Sven and Kristoff. Or being wanted as more than a friend.

Perhaps it was because of all the eavesdropping bystanders around us. I felt the pressure, my palms had gotten sweaty, and my heart was racing. Not because of excitement, but because of adrenaline. Nevertheless, I agreed to go out with Simon. Thinking back, Simon had never been cruel to me. Sure, he hadn't stopped Nala when she made my life a living hell, and he had laughed along, but that was his job, wasn't it?

I could understand why he wouldn't want to be on bad terms with Nala, and therefore played along. Sven and Kristoff had also said that they weren't dating, and that Nala had wanted it more than Simon. Also, Simon _had_ said I was hot on my first day. Maybe he was genuinely interested.

I decided not to tell Kristoff and Sven, even though they would probably know within the next ten minutes. Simon walked off with a goofy smile, running his hands through his hair. It was blonde, but darker than Kristoff's. "I'll pick you up tomorrow," he turned around and said, and with that, he left, walking his confident walk down the hall.

I was left blushing heavily in the hallway. Some of the girls standing nearby gave me approving smiles, as if they were proud to see me finally making my way up the social hierarchy.

* * *

><p>I rushed through the door to my apartment, throwing my keys on the counter. Entering my bedroom, I tossed my backpack onto the bed, and swung open my closet door. I had already regretted agreeing to Simon's proposal. However, I couldn't see the harm, after all, it was only a date. Looking into my closet, I immediately determined that I had nothing to wear. I was pacing by now, running my hands through my hair, and rubbing my temples.<p>

"But its no big deal," I said aloud. _It's a very big deal!_

"Its just a date." _Yeah, a date with the most popular guy at school!_

"Geez, good going Elsa, you've started talking to yourself, might as well start talking to the paintings on the wall," I laughed mischievously, and glimpsed embarrassed towards my Johnny Cash poster.

_Hold on. Has that always been there?_

I looked around, suddenly noticing the whole new colour-scheme my room was now possessing. My bed was covered with a deep purple bed sheet, accompanied by dark blue pillows with large white snowflakes on them. Someone had put up my Johnny Cash poster, and he was hanging in all his glory above my bed. Meanwhile a bundle of fresh flowers had been placed on my desk. White lilies.

The room was completely changed. By the door, someone had hung up the picture I had of Van Gogh's _Starry Night_. Oh, how many times I had imagined myself standing at the very peak of that swirly mountain, and feeling the freedom that would be accompanied with it. The spirally composition and careful brushstrokes was mesmerizing in their own way, and I caught myself searching for the correct shade of blue-green that matched Anna's eyes.

Looking down I noticed my toes were digging into a new white rug. There were blue and pink candles by my window frame. For a moment I was confused, until it struck me.

_Gerda…_

A smile widened on my lips. I put down a mental reminder to thank the woman the next time I saw her. I looked around again, taking it all in.

My room. _My _room. My own personal space, which for once suddenly held a strike of personality. Gerda had captured my taste perfectly. For the first time, I could actually see myself calling this place home.


	9. Hurt and Kisses

**Chapter 9 – Hurt and Kisses**

It was Friday night, and I had just finished getting ready for my date with Simon right before he came to pick me up. After thirty minutes of going through every item of clothing I owned, I'd finally settled upon a simple blue midi dress, accompanied by a black leather belt to make the outfit seem less formal. Simon wouldn't tell me where we were going, so I decided to wear a pair of black boots, in case it was anything outside.

I wasn't nervous. My stomach didn't flutter. My mind wasn't racing.

I didn't stumble over the words when Simon picked me up at my apartment building. I wasn't even worried about what I was wearing. It was all so… eccentric.

Simon was wearing a purple t-shirt that made his chest look enormous. Over his shirt, he wore a black leather jacket, not dissimilar to the one Kristoff often wore. It suited Simon though. The jacket was tight, and made his bicep look as he could crush the tough outer of a nut just by flexing. A lock of dark blonde hair escaped from the opening in his cap, which he was wearing backwards. His blue denim jeans completed his outfit beautifully, and I had to admit, Simon was good looking. If you were into beefy guys that looked like they were on steroids, that is.

As I opened the door and climbed into his car, he turned down his music. Death metal was playing from the stereo, and it nearly gave me a headache. He was sweet – perhaps a bit arrogant and stupid, but nevertheless.  
>"So, what's on tonight's agenda?" I asked as we drove further and further away from my building.<br>"A bunch of us are hanging out at Eric's place, we're meeting them there."

We soon ran out of things to talk about. He kept his answers short and unspecified, so I decided to stop asking. My mind immediately questioned who this so-called 'bunch' was, and suddenly I started questioning whether this date was a good idea. I mean, what if Nala was there?

It had all happened so quickly, and I realized this date had seemed quite rushed. Kristoff and Sven hadn't even had the time to talk me out of it, since I hadn't seen Sven since our talk at school, nor Kristoff even before that. I was certain they knew about the date however, since it probably was on everybody's gossip-agenda. Panic started to engross me, and my mind speedily started questioning the motives behind this date.

I couldn't help but think it was weird when Simon pulled into a drive-through for McDonald's. After all, this was a date. Not that I expected roses and chocolate, while he got down on one knee to sing serenades, but a McDonald's drive-through? Saying I was disappointed would have been an understatement.

Simon ordered food enough to feed an army.

"People working at McD are such losers," he mumbled under his breath. When the cashier reached down to hand him the food, Simon simply looked at me, and added, "it's for later," and then smirked. We drove off, and before I knew it, he turned off the main road.  
>Trees had started to enclose around us, and we were driving on a narrow dirt road. The town was still new and unexplored to me, and these woods were even more unfamiliar territory. My grip started to tighten around the strap of my purse. Quickly I snuck a glance over at Simon, who was sitting calmly behind the wheel, apparently trying to remove some leftovers between his teeth with his thumb. <em>Charming…<em>

His eyes were on the road, but they were searching for something. I squinted my eyes to see what Simon was looking for, but the darkness was too profuse. I felt like I was mockingly blinded by the blackness surrounding me. Simon slowed down, as if he was scouting for something, or someone.

"Simon, where are we?" _Okay, this is starting to get creepy_.

"It's a short-cut, don't worry about it," he said. We drove a bit further, before the car came to a halt. We were surrounded by the nightfall, and the nothingness the darkness withheld. Simon got out and opened the door for me. Hesitantly I stepped outside, into the unknown.

The forest around us was quiet. Nearly too quiet. I was missing the happy chippers from the birds, the scary cooing of an owl or even the slight ruffle in a bush. There were no signs of small noisy birds, owls or anything living for that matter.

"Simon?"

I felt a strong hand tighten its grip around my wrist, and yanked me forward. I nearly went tumbling, but Simon's grip didn't loosen, in fact, it seemed to become tighter. He clearly didn't know his own strength. For some reason, I wondered why he had left the food in his car.

"Come on, just through here and we'll be at Eric's house," he said nonchalant.

He dragged me along for a few more steps, before he let go. Suddenly, he grabbed my shoulders and spun me around. I was hardly able to regain my balance when he let go completely. My breath was quick and forced. Fear took over, and suddenly I was on high alert.  
>The sound of a snapping branch made me gasp, and turn my head towards the source. My night vision adjusted dreadfully slow. My blood ran cold when another snapping branch sounded. I looked to Simon, but he was gone. I wanted to scream, or run, or at least <em>do something,<em> but I was too disoriented, too scared, too confused to do anything remotely logical. It was like my instincts hadn't kicked in yet, and I was the prey, the fragile exposed little bambi, standing in the middle of the field, hardly noticing the red laser pointer from the sniper aimed at me.

Suddenly lights turned on, beaming with an extreme intensity. Quickly I covered my eyes with a hand, which were now hurting from the sudden exposure. Under the shadow of my hand, I was seeking, trying to find the source.

"W-what's going on?" My voice was fragile, almost at the breaking point.

The light was burning my eyes, as if I was looking straight into the sun. Headlights were blinding me, and I figured there at least had to be ten cars surrounding me.  
>"Oh, Elsa, did you really think anybody would want to party with <em>you<em>?" Nala's voice mocked. She sighed heavily, "poor little Elsa. I thought it was time you learned not to mess with the big boys. Bitches like you need to know their place," Nala's evil disciples laughed scornfully.

Finally, my eyes adjusted to the powerful light, and I could make out Nala's figure. She was standing confidently beside the car right in front of me. That's when I realized.

This was a set-up.

Alice, Aurora and Rapunzel were standing by the car next to Nala's, along with multiple faces I didn't recognize, but was surely went to our school. Rapunzel didn't laugh along. She only stood there, her hands in the pockets of her pink jacket, sending Simon – who had magically reappeared next to Alice – the coldest look I'd ever seen.

"Let's bail you guys," and with that, everyone got in their cars and drove off.

"I got the food!" Simon yelled proudly while readjusting his cap. "We got the booze!" Another called out in response. Simon got in his own truck, starting the engine, and putting it in reverse, leaving me stranded alone in the middle of the road. Music was blasting from his speakers, volume turned up to the max. Some of them were even honking, while the passengers were hanging out of the windows laughing loudly.

I stood there, alone in the dark, abandoned. I had no idea how to get home. Tears were rolling down my cheeks. I don't know why I fought to keep the sobs down, nobody was around to see or hear anyway. I stood for at least ten minutes, just looking around, looking scared into the unknown darkness. Creeps ran down my spine when I heard voices.

"Screw you Anna!" Hans yelled from inside the woods. He sounded furious. I heard branches snapping and the crackling sound of crushing leaves beneath their feet as they approached.

"Hans, please! Can't we talk about this?!" Their voices were getting closer.

Suddenly two figures came into sight. I could make out Anna's strawberry blonde hair; she was wearing her green jacket, skinny jeans, and brown boots. Hans was walking ahead of her, too mad to even see me.

"No, I'm done talking about this shit, fuck you!" Hans walked towards a black Volvo, ripping the door open violently. I don't know why I hadn't realized there were two cars left. Perhaps the darkness and the tears had distracted me.

"Hans, please just wait!" He was already gone though, creating a dusty cloud behind him as he was racing towards the end of the road. Anna stood there for a while, looking at the red rear lights that was Hans' car. Then she turned around, and her eyes widened in surprise.

"Where did everybody go?" Anna said quietly to herself. It wasn't until I couldn't supress a sniffle any longer that her head snapped towards me. Her eyes squinted together. My light outfit and platinum blonde hair stood out in the darkness.

"Elsa… is that you?" Her footsteps were approaching me carefully. I nodded, afraid my voice would betray me if I dared to speak. Anna was in front of me now, clearly having a difficult time making out my face.

"Elsa, what are you doing h..." It was as if something clicked inside Anna's head as soon as she saw the trail of tears on my cheeks. Her eyes widened in realization, and her jaw tightened.

"Oh shit, Elsa, I'm so sorry," she started. "I didn't kn- I didn't know they'd planned this. I-I thought it was just a party… I wouldn't have come if I'd known, you gotta believe me," Anna was scratching the back of her head. She was wearing her usual beanie.

"Fuck, I'm gonna kill them!" She said loudly, as she saw another tear silently rolling down my cheek. I hugged my arms tightly around myself, while looking down at my feet, trying hard to hide my face so that Anna wouldn't see the tears building up and on the verge to spill.

"Come on, let me drive you home," she said gently, tugging softly on my arm.

I followed her silently, and jumped into the passenger seat. Anna turned on the engine, and music started playing. However, it wasn't the type of music Simon had blasted before abandoning me on the road only a few moments ago, but calm and soothing tunes. It was classical music, purely instrumental.

"Shit," Anna mumbled, before embarrassedly turning it off. She cleared her throat awkwardly.

"I'm usually alone in my car; forgot that was in there," she said uncomfortably.

_Gosh, she's cute when she's nervous._ She looked at me, eyes holding a pitiful gaze. I couldn't stand that look. I felt so…pathetic. Had I really expected anything other than a cruel attempt to humiliate me from none other than Simon? Nala really did have her claws buried deep into that boy. How could I be this naive?

Anna reached over in a determined movement, hand almost touching my knee as she opened the glove compartment. She pulled out some tissues, and handed them to me. I rubbed away some smeared makeup from under my eye, and with help from the side mirrors, I almost looked presentable again.

"So…" Anna tried, clearly wanting to break the tension. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I shook my head. It was too humiliating. It was too degrading to think how gullible Anna must have thought I was. How stupid and naïve I was. I cleared my throat.

"What happened between you and Hans?" I asked, voice still shaky, but thankful that I was able to change the subject.

"Oh, that…" Anna said and trailed off, reconstructing the fight with Hans in her head. Her eyes were on the road. I was relieved when we finally took a right turn, and Anna drove us up a main road with streetlights and traffic.

"We broke up. Actually, we broke up a few days ago. He was so furious that he barely heard me out, and I haven't gotten the chance to talk to him since… until tonight. I wanted to check if he was okay, and part on good terms, you know." I turned my head to look out the window, away from Anna, while I tried my hardest to suppress a smirk. _About time she got rid of that douchebag. _

"Is that why he stormed off like that?"

Anna made a grimace, I honestly couldn't really tell if she wanted to frown or laugh.

"No," she clenched the wheel, "he got mad when I said I didn't want to have break-up sex against a tree," Anna bit her lip; her eyes flickered to me, and then back to the road. It was quiet for a moment, an awkward silence.

"Oh…" I said, clearing my throat once again. The city was rapidly approaching, and slowly I started recognizing my surroundings. I told her to go left.

"Why did you break up?" _Christ Elsa, show some sympathy, the girl just broke up with her boyfriend…even if he was a complete asshole._

"I-I mean, are you okay?" I asked, trying not to make it sound forced. This time Anna actually laughed, and it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever heard. I could see my apartment building now, and I told Anna to park in front of the line of cars that were a few hundred meters away.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she snickered, "but thanks for asking." It was quiet for a few seconds, and I figured she had forgotten about my first question.

"I don't know. It just wasn't working out, in fact… I think I'm falling for someone else," Anna's voice was calm, but certain. Her eyes were still on the road, suddenly pulling in towards the curb, and coming to a full stop in front of my building. I unbuckled my seatbelt, and turned towards Anna. Teal eyes met my gaze, she was smiling.

"Thanks for the lift," I said. I reached to the floor to grab my purse at the same time as Anna did. We nearly bumped heads, but luckily we both looked up in time before collision. Her face was so close to mine.

"I never noticed you had freckles," she whispered, her eyes studying the bridge of my nose. I flushed, trying to avoid her gaze, but her look was so determined and firm I couldn't look away. Before I knew it, Anna was leaning in, and our lips almost grazed. Her hot breath touched my lips.

Startled, I pulled away.

"W-What are you doing?" Anna retrieved to her own space now, looking at me with wide eyes.

"Umm, about to kiss you I guess," she said, a hand shooting back to scratch the back of her head.

"I-I'm… I'm not gay," I stated. _Wait, is _she_ gay? Does she think _I'm_ gay? _"Wait, do I send some sort of gay vibe?" My voice was frigid.  
>"Um, yeah you kind of do in fact…" Anna said. The girl looked at me intensely, pity and hurt in her eyes.<br>"I-I'm not gay! I'm normal!" Anna flinched after I'd said the word 'normal.' I ran my hands through my hair. For a moment, I couldn't breathe.

"I shouldn't feel this way! This…this isn't right," for some reason I started to panic. Trying to defend my sexuality in front of Anna set my nerves on edge. I was in denial, and deep down I knew it. However, I couldn't admit it to myself; I wouldn't. I couldn't help but think that this, these feelings I had developed for the girl in front of me, was a flaw. I tried to gather myself, but it was like catching smoke with your bare hands: simply impossible.  
>"You shouldn't be feeling <em>how<em> Elsa?" Anna asked persistently.

I couldn't answer. My throat had tied itself together, and I could merely stare at my hands. They were fiddling in my lap.

"Elsa, its okay, you don't have to label yourself as anything," Anna tried, putting a soothing arm around me. I tried to wiggle out of the embrace, but at the same time, I regretted doing so. Anna pulled her arm back, hurt shone in her eyes.  
>"Elsa…I can't deny my feelings for you. And you clearly have feelings for me as well," Anna stated. She was so sure of her case. Jealousy struck me.<br>"I-I'm not even sure _how_ to feel anymore…" the tears were spilling again.

With that I grabbed the door handled and entered the cold night air, leaving Anna behind in the car. I slammed the door shut, and walked with intense steps towards home. I heard the sound of a car door open behind me.

"Elsa, wait!" The girl called. I didn't stop, nor turn around. I clenched my arms around myself. But Anna was fast, and soon she stood in front of me, chest heaving a tiny bit.  
>"Just…Elsa, I…" for the first time, Anna stood speechless. For once, she couldn't find the words. Instead, she took a step forward, and looked me deep in the eye. Her hand was on my cheek. She was shivering. I didn't know if it was from the cold, or if it was because there were merely two centimetres between us. She leaned into me, lips so close, so tempting, but still not quite – expanding the drum roll for as long as possible, when suddenly she leaned in all the way.<p>

And I let her.

_Gosh, this feels so right._ I couldn't move, I'd frozen under her warm soft lips. Soon her lips started moving in this perfect dance of hers, and mine tried to keep up. The kiss was so gentle compared to boys' lips. She treated me as this fragile picture, in the hands of her confident and protective frame – which was odd since I was typically the frame, though with no image to hold.

Her hands rested firmly on my hips, mine sneaking onto her back.

There was electricity in the air between us; you could light a whole city with it. I was lightheaded and woozy, and at the same time, I felt complete. A feeling I hadn't felt since I was six. All these emotions came crushing down on me.

I was nervous. My stomach was fluttering. My mind was racing.

_How can something that feels so right be so wrong?_ With a gasp, I flinched away, not totally sure of what had just happened.

I pushed her away, her hands quickly releasing my hips. Anger and denial hit again, overpowering the other feelings. Anna looked at me, expectantly, worried, and longingly. For a moment, I wanted to slap her. I wanted to slap her for making me feel this way. For making me realize how flawed I truly was. I turned around, and stormed towards the elevator. Anna was still standing outside in the cold as the elevator doors closed.

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><p><strong>AN:** Oh my glob, they kissed! Yes, I recently watched Kick-Ass 2 when writing this chapter. Honestly, that scene was the one to put everything in motion. Actually this was some of the very first I wrote. I hope I wasn't too harsh on Elsa…

Thank you for the follows/favourites, and most importantly thanks for the reviews. Honestly, I felt a bit discouraged. Reality suddenly struck, after spending a bit more than a week here, and I was feeling pretty alone, and almost didn't update. But then I read you guy's comments, and that really cheered me up! Feel free to leave more :) I know this update is a bit early, but I'm afraid it might be a week until the next one.

Thanks to Andy for helping me edit this chapter!


	10. Mistakes and alcohol

**Chapter 10 – Mistakes and Alcohol**

**Heads up/Warning: **chapter contains some violence.

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><p>I didn't sleep at all that night. After having left Anna outside in the cold, and the elevator doors had closed, I had fallen to my knees crying. The sobs were loud, and I didn't even try to contain them. Finally having found my feet again, my legs carried me to the apartment, and I let myself in. The remainder of the night I spend in my room, sitting on the stool by my desk.<p>

With shaking hands, I had opened my laptop, searching online. For hours, I took online tests and quizzes. Titles like "How to Know You Are Gay," and "10 Signs You Are Gay," popped up on the screen. My body was out of fluid to produce any more tears. Or I thought so at least. Finally, after enough unwanted results, I smacked my laptop closed.

It was seven in the morning when I grabbed one of the snowflake pillows on my bed and smashed it against the wall. The pillow collided with the wall a few more times before feathers started to swirl around the room, like snowflakes falling from the sky, creating a bed of feathers across the entire room.

Some got stuck in my hair, but the defeat was still fresh and ruling every aspect of my brain, making it impossible to care for such an extraneous factor. When the pillow was empty, and hung limp at my side, I grabbed another one.

And another one.

It wasn't until I reached for my fourth pillow to violently eradicate in my destructive frenzy that Gerda walked in, her expression aghast. I hadn't heard her arrive, so I stopped demolishing the pillow when I saw her standing in the doorway. My eyes were puffy, and tears had started flowing once again, even though I thought my body was completely incapable. I ignored the headache for now, but could slowly feel that I wouldn't last much longer without some water and sleep. I must have looked terrifying, wearing my outfit from yesterday, and still wearing my boots. The floor was white from the feathers.

"Heavens, Elsa, what're you doing?" Gerda said, her hands in her sides. She looked at me, and I looked at her, and then I broke down on the floor for the second time that day. I fell to my knees, sobs escaping again. I was laying in the feathers, they looked like snow. It was comforting, it was soft.

I felt a hand stroke my hair, before an arm was pulled around me. Gerda drew me towards her, embracing me wholeheartedly. We sat like that for a long time. I was tired, and almost fell asleep her on shoulder. She led me to the bed, where she put my head on her lap until I fell asleep. She was singing to me, it sounded like a lullaby. I didn't recognize the tunes. Before I drifted off, Gerda smiled at me.

"You could've just told me you didn't like the pillows," she said teasingly.

I exhaled through my nose, smiling softly at her before I let sleep pull me out of consciousness. When I woke up, the feathers were gone and so was Gerda. The only thing that was left was a note on my nightstand, with a number and an address saying, "_If you ever need anything."_

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><p><strong>Anna<strong> [08:45]:_ Elsa, please can we just talk about this?_

**Anna** [10:37]:_ Please pick up the phone._

**Anna** [14:16]:_ Talk to me Elsa_

**Anna** [15:57]:_ I'll be at the school parking lot for thirty minutes after school, if you don't show up I'll be here again tomorrow._

I hadn't replied any of Anna's texts over the weekend, nor had I any intentions of meeting her after school. As the week progressed, her messages died out little by little. She hadn't dared trying to approach me at school, which was probably for the best.

After the humiliating set-up party last Friday, Nala and her gang had thankfully decided to give me break. I didn't know how long this break would last, so I simply enjoyed it while I could.

Sven and Kristoff had decided to start acting as my own personal bodyguards after they heard what had happened last Friday. No one was to even look at me wrong before either Sven put a protective arm around me, or Kristoff shovelled in closer to me as we walked. It was nice to see how much they cared. They were like the older brothers I never had. Sven and I hadn't spoken about our last conversation, and I had decided to leave it.

It was better this way. Everything was better this way.

_Yeah keep telling yourself that_, my mind said mockingly.

"Why can't you just shut up for once," I mumbled to myself.

A week had passed since me and Anna's kiss and the texting had completely come to a stop. I had decided to take the next step with Sven and Kristoff, and invited them to my place. Per usual, my father was out of town, and therefore we had the apartment completely to ourselves.

"Well, this is some fancy shit," Kristoff said as he pulled out a bottle of scotch from my father's liquor cabinet. He saw the look on my face, and then added, "don't worry, we'll replace it with some spiced-up ice tea afterwards." We each poured a glass, almost to the edge, before slumping down into the couch.

"Careful, she's a lightweight," Kristoff said to Sven.

"Yeah, yeah, let the girl have some fun," Sven said, imitating a fatherly voice. Kristoff took up most of the space on the couch. He grabbed the remote and found a basketball game we all could watch. We all emptied our glasses, and Kristoff poured us another one. Soon we were all laying on the couch, giggling like maniacs. The boys were slightly tipsy, whereas I was on the verge to becoming rather drunk. They had at least twenty kilos on me, so it didn't exactly come as a surprise.

"Well kids, it's been fun, but I have work tomorrow, so I'm gonna bail," Kristoff said. Sven just wafted him off, pretending to be offended. He shot one look at me, and reached down to hug me.

"Don't let her drink anymore," Kristoff said to Sven before closing the door behind him. Sven took another swig of his drink, finishing it. Then he got up, and went to the kitchen, saying something about water. I didn't entirely listen as I was too fascinated by the remote control and it's magical powers to switch the TV on and off. Who knew a remote could be this fun when you were drunk? My cheeks were warm, and it felt nice. It felt nice to for once be outside of my own head. No worrying. No thinking. No Nala. And definitely no Anna… _Anna._ The girl simply wouldn't leave my mind, she was clinging herself to my brain, as if she was glue. _Anna,_ I wanted to say her name aloud so badly. Let the name roll off my tongue. My fingers touched my lips, and I grazed upon where Anna's lips had once touched. Her sweet and soft lips.

The room was spinning as I stood up**, **I was floating in my drunk state. I nearly tripped over my own feet. Sven had returned, placing a large glass of water on the coffee table.

"Woah, you okay there?" Sven caught me in his strong arms.

I looked into his chocolate brown eyes. He looked into my icy blue ones, not letting go of me. His lips looked soft, but not as soft as Anna's.

However, I would not deny myself the opportunity to test it. I stood on my tiptoes to reach his lips. He kissed me back immediately, hungrily. His arms wrapped around me, and I flung my arms around his neck, kissing him sloppily. My hands were in his hair now, pulling him closer, crushing our lips together. The tiny stubbles on his chin scratched my face as I pulled him even closer. Our teeth collided at some point, but I didn't care.

_This is wrong._

My head was buzzing. I took a few steps backwards. He pushed me against the wall, pressing his lips harder against mine. We were breathing heavily. I opened my mouth to push my tongue into Sven's. He reciprocated by meeting my tongue half-way, gently swiping it over my lip. He didn't smell as good as Anna. Not even close.

_Elsa stop._

A hand that was once resting on my back slid down and grabbed my rear, squeezing slightly. The other followed suit, sliding its way down from my neck, over the curve of my breast, to finally grab firmly onto my ass. A groan escaped from Sven's throat. _You cannot afford to lose another friend. _My hands came down and rested on his chest. We parted for air. Sven was about to kiss me again, but stopped halfway before reaching my lips.

"Maybe we shouldn't do this," he stated. His hands let go of me, and suddenly I wasn't pinned against the wall anymore.

I hadn't felt anything. I wasn't even turned on the slightest by him, and it almost made me tear up. In fact, the first tears were already making their way down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry," my voice cracked as I said it.

"Hey, hey," Sven said comforting, worry in his voice. "It's okay, let's just forget about it. You need some rest," before I knew it, he scooped me up from the floor and carried me to my room. He laid me down on my bed and I curled up into a ball, sobs escaping uncontrollably. I could sense Sven wasn't exactly sure of what to do, while he drunkenly searched my nightstand for tissues. His search as unsuccessful, and therefore he decided to scoot down next to me, holding me. I let his strong arms comfort me, while I let myself drift off to sleep on my tear-soaked pillow.

We both woke by the usual Saturday morning 'thunk' from Gerda's vacuum that collided with my door.

"Oh God, I think my head might explode," Sven announced with a hoarse voice. He sat up, pinching the bridge of his nose.

I sat up slowly, afraid yesterday's alcohol might make a reappearance. Luckily, it was only a throbbing headache that declared its presence, and the nausea disappeared rather quickly. I was rubbing my temples. The door suddenly shot open, and the sunlight blinded both me and Sven. We groaned loudly probably sounding like dying walruses, or something equally loud and obnoxious. Thankfully, we were both fully dressed as Gerda walked in without a care in the world.

"Good morning you two, breakfast's on the table," she hummed lightly to herself, and rolled up the blinds, making Sven and I flinch. Sven got up casually, and walked towards the kitchen.

"Thank God, I'm starving," he announced and left the room. I was still sitting on the edge of my bed, avoiding Gerda's gaze. She finally caught my eyes though, and send me a knowingly smirk, and a wink, before retreating to cleaning my room. I rolled my eyes, and followed Sven to the kitchen, my cheeks red as fire.

* * *

><p>Gerda hadn't asked about Sven, and Sven hadn't mentioned the kiss last night, both of which I was thankful for. I was alone in the apartment once again, and for once, it felt nice. I was about to pull out a precooked meal from the microwave Gerda had prepared for me, when my phone buzzed. I expected it had been a text from Kristoff, telling me to watch tonight's basketball game so we could discuss it the next day, since Sven dreaded basketball with every fibre of his being. That was why I was surprised when I saw it was from Anna.<p>

**Anna **[21:51]: _Ellsa y dunt u likew mew?++dfsdfg_

I looked an extra time at the message, trying to make sense of it. Before I had time to reply, my phone was ringing, Anna's name popping up on the display. Pressing 'accept call' I answered the phone.

"Anna?" I asked. There was so much noise in the background I could barely make out her voice.

"Elsa!" she called on the other end of the phone, obviously drunk.

"Anna, is everything alright?"

"You havin't anshwered my callz!" She said, stumbling over the words. She was angry. It was hard to make out what she was saying. I put a hand over my ear to block out all other sound.

"Anna, are you okay?" I asked again, loud and clear. The noise in the background grew louder. Anna took in a deep breath of air, and exhaled loudly. She was smoking, I could tell.

"Why do ya' care?" She asked hurt. She hiccupped as she said it, taking another puff on her cigarette. "You dunt evan like me," she said. There was suddenly a loud crackling noise, and Anna was gone.

"Anna? Anna?!" I called. More crackling noises. Anna was on the other end again, she must have dropped the phone. It was quiet for a little while. Then I heard sniffling.  
>"Why dunt you like meh Elsa?" she said taking a long loud draw of her cigarette.<p>

"Hey! Careful with that!" A voice called. I imagined Anna must have almost burned some poor soul with her cigarette.

"Screw you, asshole!" Anna exclaimed to the person, obviously almost forgetting she was on the phone. There was some ruffled sounds, more crackling noises.

"Hans get off me!" She yelled. My blood ran cold.

"Anna where are you?" I asked calmly, but she was too busy arguing with the Hans. No answer.

"Anna?" I repeated her name until I heard there was contact on the other end. When I heard the sound of a phone being pressed to an ear, I continued.

"Anna, tell me where you are, right now." It was quiet for way too long – I didn't like it, I didn't like it one bit. I was about to burst out in full panic mode, when Anna finally answered.

"I'm at Rapunzel's," Anna finally said.

"Stay there," I said. "Don't move, and don't go near Hans," I ordered as I grabbed my coat and keys and headed for the door. There was some silence on the line again, only the sound of a large crowd roaring in the background. I heard Hans' voice again, and suddenly the phone was disconnected.

I called Kristoff to find out where Rapunzel lived, it wasn't far from my place.

"Why do you ask?" Kristoff said on the other end.

"I, er, um… Anna left me some, er, math notes there," I lied. _My goodness, Elsa, you're a horrible liar!_

"You can't get them tomorrow? Are you really gonna drive there right now?"

"I need them now. Mr. Hawkin's gonna kill me if I don't get this done."

"If you say so," I could almost hear Kristoff shrug, before he hung up.

Still new to the city I drove around for a while, directionless. I rolled down my window in hope that I could follow the sound of the blasting music. Finally, I heard the bass, and I immediately headed towards the deafening dance music. I pulled in, parking almost in the middle of the road, since the street was filled with cars, leaving hardly any spots to park. I figured no one would be driving this late at night anyway. With determined steps, I walked towards the house, trying to withhold a confident posture and a threatening gaze.

I stopped right before I entered the front yard. My throat had closed in on itself, when the thought struck me._ What if Nala is there? What if Simon is there? They'll eat me alive._ I took a deep breath, trying to unknot the bundle of nervousness in my stomach. Nala would never allow me to crash this party, it wouldn't go unnoticed. My hands tightened into fists.

_Screw it,_ I thought as I walked into the house, each step forcefully pushing me forward.

I passed several drunk bodies, some eyeing me with a mocking or harsh gaze, others simply ignoring my presence. I searched all over the house, upstairs, downstairs, kitchen, living room, bedrooms – everywhere. I even almost knocked the door down to the bathroom, only to find Anna wasn't inside. She didn't pick up her phone. I was yet again standing in the living room, scouting for the auburn haired girl. I hadn't seen Hans anywhere. My mind started imagining various scenarios, and I suddenly felt sick.

"Who invited _you_?" A voice behind me asked. I turned around, and there Nala was standing, with a drink in her hand.

"Your mother never told you it's not polite to crash parties?" She asked, her words were mocking. Talking to me as if I was a kid, like I was a person of less worth. Her blonde hair was pulled into a braid, draped over her shoulder. Exactly like my hair was styled right now. She laughed and took another sip of her drink.

"Hey everyone!" Nala called out, trying to overpower the music. "Everyone! Look who's here!" The room fell quiet, and someone turned down the music.

"It's the Ice Queen!" Nala shouted, and the audience roared with laughter. The crowd had formed a solid and impenetrable circle around us. I was scouting for Anna again, hoping that I would see her face in the crowd of people surrounding us.

"Aw, what's the matter sweet-cheeks, looking for mommy?" Nala asked smirking. My eyes suddenly caught a glimpse of Hans, recognizing the auburn sideburns. I wasn't sure whether I was relieved or even more terrified. I couldn't focus on Nala who was standing right in front of me; instead I frantically looked around, searching and searching for Anna, desperately hoping to catch a glimpse of one of her braids, or her beanie, or her wonderful teal eyes.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you," Nala said, voice now harsh. She had turned my head with the tip of her finger, resting it on my jaw. _How did she get so close?_ By pure reflex, I smacked away her hand. I didn't want her touching me, hell, it had taken me several weeks to get used to Sven and Kristoff touching me.

Nala, however, took it as the worst possible insult.

She dropped her drink, beer splattering all over the floor, and shoved me hard. I fell backwards, but was caught by the wall of people behind me, who bounced me back on my feet. Frustration and anger suddenly took over, and I found myself shoving back.

It all escalated so quickly, and after some shoving and slapping, Nala was on top of me. Her nails were long, resulting in a long scratch above my eyebrow. I felt blood seeping out slowly. The tables turned and now I was on top, trying to hold her down to prevent her from smacking me in the face. I was straddling Nala, and for moment, I was thankful that I had decided to wear jeans. Her arms swung wildly around her, aiming for my face. She succeeded, and got a good punch in. Blood was flowing from my nose.

I regretted it as soon as I'd slapped her back, leaving a trail of red across her cheek. I didn't _want_ to hurt her. But she left me no choice. Fighting wasn't my style, but I was all for self-defence. Hands suddenly snuck up behind me, pulling me off Nala. Someone helped Nala up as well, holding her back, as she looked like she was about to jump out and rip out my throat. Admittedly, I was a little proud to see the mark I had left on the blonde girl's cheek.

Someone brought me to the kitchen, ensuring to separate Nala and me. The music started blasting again, and I was standing in the kitchen with one other. She had short brown spunky hair, and was wearing a pink shirt that didn't cover her stomach. She grabbed some paper towels and began to try to stop the blood from rushing out of my nose. The adrenaline had my body shaking, and I had to clench my hands to the table to make them stop.

It still hadn't hit me that I had just been in a fight with Nala in front of everyone. On Monday, the whole school would know, and I would be forced to have Kristoff and Sven with me _everywhere._ Nala wasn't through with me. I dreaded my stupidity for shoving back, but at the same time I couldn't let it go unnoticed. I was done being pushed around. I was done being afraid.

"You know," the brown-haired woman started, "I really don't appreciate you crashing my party." Rapunzel gave me a warning look with her green eyes, but kept drying off the blood.  
>"Tilt your head back," she said, and I obliged.<p>

"I'm sorry," I said, trying to speak, but finding it hard as she was rubbing my face with the towel. It was quiet for a little while.

"It's alright, I know you didn't start it," Rapunzel said, and for the first time that night, I saw her smile.  
>"There, all done," Rapunzel went to throw out the bloody paper towels. I looked down, and saw my shirt covered in blood. Luckily, nothing had gotten on my jacket. Rapunzel returned, and it stroke me how much she reminded me of Anna. <em>Anna!<em> I had almost forgotten why I was truly here, and panic started to rise again.  
>"Have you seen Anna?" I asked Rapunzel urgently. Rapunzel looked puzzled for a moment.<p>

"My cousin? Last I saw her, she told me she would go smoke in the back to get rid of Hans," Rapunzel barely finished her sentence before I ran out of the kitchen, searching for the back door, wishing and praying I wouldn't run into Nala again. Some people were blocking the door, so I pushed my way in between them. They clearly weren't bothered by my clumsy exit, and let me through with no trouble. I stepped outside into the fresh chilly night air.

There Anna sat, leaning against the house, sitting on a sofa cushion. She was asleep, an unlit cigarette dangling from her mouth. I exhaled loudly in relief. I'd never been so happy to see a person in my life. She was curled up on the cushion, hugging her jacket tightly around her. I kneeled beside her, touching her shoulder.

"Anna," I shook her gently. The redhead stirred a bit under my touch, mumbling something incomprehensible.

"Anna," I said a bit louder.

"Hm?" Anna's hazy eyes opened slowly. "Elsa?" She mumbled sleepily. I took the cigarette from her mouth, and placed it in the pocket of my jacket. Then I took one of her arms, and pulled it over my shoulder.

Together we rose from the ground, Anna only helping a bit. She wasn't heavy, but my body was aching from wrestling around on the floor with Nala. When she finally found her legs, she was able to sustain her own body weight. I snaked my other arm around her waist, pulling her closer to me for stability, as we walked towards my car. It was dark and I couldn't see where I was stepping. We stumbled a few times, but finally made it to the car. The people in front of the house didn't pay us any attention, probably because they couldn't see us. It was too dark. As I tried opening the car door for Anna, she suddenly swung her arms around my neck in her drunken haze. We stood leaning against the car for a little while, my arms around her waist, hers' around my neck.

I finally had her in my arms, and I had no intentions of letting go anytime soon.

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><p><strong>AN:** If anyone is curious, I was listening to "The Day after Tomorrow" by Saybia while writing/editing this. I thought the song suited Elsa's situation well.


	11. Letting Go

**Chapter 11 – Letting go**

**Heads up/Warning: **_Indication_ of self-harm.

* * *

><p>I was sitting on one of the bar stools in the kitchen, slowly sipping my tea, and crunched over my math homework. My hand was scribbling numbers and letters in my notebook, careful not to smudge the writing.<p>

_At least it looks neat…_ I thought, trying to suppress the hopeless feeling of failure, while glancing over my less than mediocre math skills. Some things would just never make sense to me, math being one of them. Pineapple on pizza being another.

The faint sound of a door opening made me turn my head. Anna stood in the doorway to my room looking at me. She was still wearing the outfit she had worn from the party yesterday. I'd only managed to get her boots and jacket off, before she crashed on my bed.

Her wobbly state had had me worried. Even as Anna laid on the bed, she didn't seem to find comfort in the stability the mattress provided. The world must have been spinning beyond compare for the girl. I knew the feeling of wanting to strap pegs and ropes onto the bed, just make the room hold still. In fact, I had relived that feeling merely two nights ago.

After having forced two glasses of water down Anna's throat, which she was highly unwilling to swallow, I was about to leave, having accustomed the sofa with a blanket and a pillow. However, Anna had held my hand firmly, pulling me down towards her. Maybe she didn't want to be alone in her drunk state, or perhaps just seized the opportunity to cuddle. Either way, I slid under the covers, pressing my back against Anna. She'd felt so warm against me, her arms wrapped around my waist.

I awoke early as usual, but figured Anna needed some more sleep to recover from the immense amount of alcohol she had consumed at Rapunzel's party.

Now she was standing before me, wearing her skinny jeans, and a low-cut t-shirt. Her hair was still in two braids, and she was holding a hand to her forehead.

"Hey," I said, putting down my pen. She slowly walked forward.  
>"Urgh, why're you shouting," she said, half-jokingly.<p>

I chuckled, watching as she slumped down in the stool next to me, dropping her head on the table. I went to the bathroom and brought back some aspirin for her. My fingertips touched her palm as I handed her the pills, and my stomach did a thing. I retrieved my hand, but a tingling sensation still stirred under the skin of my fingers.

She chucked down the two pills with a glass of water in two big gulps. I stood in the kitchen, Anna sat at the counter, only the kitchen island separating us. After a while, Anna stopped rubbing her forehead, looking more relieved.

"Thank you," she said, though her eyes displayed sadness. "I'm sorry about last night," she continued. "I'm not entirely sure what happened, but thank yo– what the hell happened to your face!?"

It hit me that Anna must have been sound asleep while the fight had occurred inside, and while Rapunzel had cleaned up my nose stopping the hot thick fluid from gushing out. It had been too dark for Anna to have noticed my bloody attire. But the gash above my eyebrow still exhibited a long thin crimson line.

My hand flew to the cut and touched the congealed line of blood, feeling its hard surface.

"Oh, that…" I mumbled, my eyes falling to the counter. I took a quick breath, still not looking at the girl, before continuing.

"Well, we were talking on the phone, and I heard Hans in the background, so I got worried, and I jumped into my car and crashed Rapunzel's party to check if you were okay, and then I ran into Nala, and we sorta got into this fight, and I punched her, but then someone stopped me, and Rapunzel helped me, then I found you outside and brought you here…" I was stumbling over the words, fully aware how fast I was talking, not a single breath in-between sentences. Completely aware how ridiculous it all had sounded, and how incomprehensible my words had probably been, I turned to look at Anna again. She was sitting up straight, she'd shot up as soon as I'd mentioned the Nala-part. Her face displayed shock.

"You fought Nala?!" Anna's eyebrows shut up into her hairline, before a proud smirk came across her face.

"Holy shit Elsa, I didn't know you were such a badass," Anna chuckled.

My gaze fell upon the kitchen counter again. Fighting Nala wasn't one of my proudest moments, though I was gratified I hadn't knocked her out in my violent frenzy. Nevertheless, I couldn't help the shameful expression that now covered my features, and the guilt building up inside of me. I could sense the way Anna's face fell into a frown, even without looking at her.

She got up and walked around the kitchen island. She approached me slowly, stopping as she reached my side. I turned my front towards her, raising my gaze to her eyes. They were filled with concern now. Her brows knitted together in a guilty expression.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to say that," the younger girl said. "I should really learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes," she mumbled, mostly to herself.

Anna scanned me up and down, examining me for bruises and cuts, before finally resting her eyes on the cut above my eyebrow. She looked at it with dismay. For a moment, the girl almost looked ashamed of herself. Her hands were clenched at her sides, leaving her knuckles completely bloodless.

Anna's eyes were glistering now, and I could see how hard she was trying to hold back the tears. I had never seen Anna cry, and honestly, I wished she wouldn't let the tears trail down her cheeks. One reason being I would have no idea how to comfort her, but mostly because I didn't like to see Anna unhappy. She was the most energized and spirited person I knew, and I hated seeing the hurt face she was displaying now.

"No matter what I do, it always seem like I'm hurting you… and all I can do is make these lame apologies," she said in all seriousness, with a trembling, husky voice.

"I understand if you don't want to talk to me again. You've made it pretty clear you don't feel the same way, so…" Anna cleared her throat, her eyes not as watery as before.

The words felt like a dragger to the heart. Not just a dagger; perhaps a dagger being stabbed into the pumping organ, for then to be twisted around real good.

"I should probably go," she finally said.

The redhead gathered her jacket and boots, which I had delicately placed by the sofa. The girl quickly tied the lazes on her boots. With her arms fiddling to get into the sleeves, she aimed for the door.

_Don't let her leave Elsa! Do something!_

Anna had her hand on the doorknob, already twisting it until the lock gave a distinct _click._ My heart was aching when I heard the sound. The white walls seemed to enclose on me, and air was struggling to fill my system. I finally decided to stop fighting it.

The perfect plain white walls had been holding me prisoner long enough, and it was time to push back.

All I wanted to do was to leap forward and shut the door, before the strawberry blonde had a chance to exit. So that's what I did. I nearly caught Anna's fingers in the doorway in the process.

"Elsa, what're you doing?" Anna asked with a surprised tone.

My palm was flat against the white wooden door, blocking it so Anna wouldn't escape. When I didn't respond Anna's eyes grew worried. Her hands came up, but she dropped them again immediately, fearing my response to her touch.

"I-I do like you Anna." It came out as barely a whisper, but Anna heard me.

"But…?" The younger girl was dreading the words that were to follow.

But that was it. That was all I had to say.

"No buts," I assured her. I tried to make my voice sound determined.

"Oh," Anna said still very surprised, her eyebrows shooting upwards. I couldn't help but notice her mouth hanging slightly open. We stood for a moment in silence, the tension rising for each second passing. It was getting awkward. I didn't know what to say, and for a second it felt like I was sitting across from my father, having the distinct feeling of being out of words. Secretly, I was wishing I had my notecards to guide me through this. Luckily, Anna was much better at talking than I was.

"So…" she started. Okay, maybe not a whole lot better at the moment.

"So," I stated consequently.

Anna was leaning against the wall now with one shoulder, her cheek was close to my hand that was still resting on the surface of the door.  
>"So, what does this mean?" She asked. Anna stood patiently, waiting for my response. I could see the anticipation in her eyes, as if my answer could go either way. Retrieving my hand from the door, I wrapped my arms around myself, and stared at the ground.<p>

"I don't know."

This wasn't going anywhere. Not until Anna placed a hand on each of my arms, unwrapping me from my own embrace. My arms dropped to my sides, and Anna's hands traced down them. First, they moved soothingly over my shoulders, then down my elbows, to finally settle in my hands.

Anna took a step forward, testing the waters. When she noticed I didn't pull back, she came even closer. Our foreheads were almost touching. Anna's eyes kept flickering from my eyes to my mouth, back and forth at least five times.

Then she kissed me.

Gentle lips traced mine insecurely. Her breath was hot against my mouth. She seemed to grow more confident when she felt my hands relax in hers, for then to come up to cup her cheeks.

Strong hands traced down my sides, before settling on my hips. Anna grew more and more bold, and I felt her take my bottom lip between hers. She pulled me closer, stomachs colliding. My hands ran down her neck to rest on her shoulders. I felt the burning in my core, longing for Anna's touch.

Carefully, I opened my mouth, letting her in. She happily accepted the invitation, and slid her tongue between my lips. She tasted like booze and cigarettes, but at that very moment, it was the most delicious thing I'd ever tasted. It wasn't long before the kiss lost its gentleness, and our lips were rubbing hungrily against each other. A small moan escaped from Anna's throat as the girl pressed against me.

Soon she had me pinned against the door, our hips bumping against each other. Before I knew it, she scooped me up. My legs wrapped around her waist. We couldn't get enough of each other. I wanted to hug her so tightly I might crush her, and even then, it still wouldn't be enough. We were panting hard, heaving for air as we separated at last.

"Maybe… we should take this slow," I said in between heavy breaths. Leaning my forehead against hers, I raised my gaze to reach her lovely teal orbs. She looked me deep in the eye.

"You're right," Anna said, trying to catch her breath. She put me down, but before she let go completely, she brushed a strand of hair behind my ear. A goofy smile spread across the girl's face. I was pleased to the see the guilty expression having left her features. She was beaming with joy, it was radiating from her, and she wasn't trying to hide it.

"I should probably get going," a hand shot up, rubbing the back of her head. "I could really use a shower."

I giggled. How could anybody be this adorable? I nodded in agreement, though I didn't want to see her go already. I was ready to offer the girl to shower here, but my father would be home at some unknown time slot in the duration of the day, and I could not risk them meeting. Not yet, and hopefully not ever.

"Your mom is probably worried," I said in sudden realization. Anna's grin didn't falter, which ensured me that things were alright.

"Nah, she thinks I slept over at Rapunzel's" she said nonchalant. "She loves you by the way, my mom. She would probably love if I could sit up that straight," she teased. Her eyes were glowing, and it made my stomach flutter. A smile crept upon my lips as well, seeing the girl this excited. Before she left, she gave me a quick peck on the cheek. I watched her enter the elevator, still feeling her warm lips linger on my cheek.

As soon as I heard the familiar sound of the elevator doors closing through the front door, everything came crashing down on me. I slid against the wall until I reached the floor. Curling my legs up underneath me, I buried my face in my hands.

All these emotions were too much. Anna had ignited something within me, something I had forgotten I possessed.

But the small spark was slowly dying out in the lack of her presence. My body was slowly returning to its numb state. The white walls standing strong again.

_This is wrong, this is wrong, this is wrong…_ my mind cried repeatedly.

I got up and walked frantically around the house. Pacing through the living room, my mind became plagued by my dull surroundings. Instantly the utter repulsion of the room rose up inside of me.

Disgusted by the beige couch, the insanely white pillows, the horrifically dull lamp, the grey table. I felt anger rise, my emotions all over the place. My abdomen tensed, and all I wanted was to sink to the floor, and let the anger eat me up. The way I always let it; letting the anger feed on my flesh, my bones…my mind.

Cold sweats started to spread, telling me my body was still in shock; my muscles were so tense the contraction almost made them spasm. It would be so easy to curl into my usual ball of protection, and numbness – it was so tempting. Instead, I went to the kitchen.

Opening the kitchen drawers frenziedly, I stumbled across the sharp kitchen knives. I looked at them, and I could almost feel their razor sharp edges staring back. Looking down at my wrist, I saw a thing line, exhibiting an even paler complexion than the rest of my skin. It was hardly visible anymore. I remembered back for a moment.

The sharp razor rested on my pale skin. Would I be able to feel it? Nothing seemed to evoke any feelings whatsoever, and I desperately just needed to feel _something_. I wanted to ensure I still _could_ feel, even if it only was pain. An edge was about to penetrate my flawless outer. Blood was on the verge of spilling. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't get myself to cut through, to leave a mark. It would scar, and stay on my wrist for all eternity. It would be a flaw. I would no longer be perfect. I would be even more broken than I already was, and even more imperfect.

I didn't go through with it. The cut on my wrist was from the neighbour's cat when my father and I were living in Germany. The nasty little thing had scratched me real good after a belly rub.

I closed the knife-drawer, and opened the drawer underneath. It was stuffed with baking material. I grabbed some red and blue food-coloring Gerda had used to bake a cake with the British flag, saying we were to celebrate her daughter's birthday. She had gone all in with birthday candles and everything; she even had me take a picture with the cake to send to her.

I unscrewed the lids on the two bottles, and walked to the huge wall in the living room, right across from the kitchen.

I squeezed one of the bottles, and a thick messy line of blue settled across the whiteness.

It was like magic, seeing the tiny blue drops seep down the vertical surface. I squeezed again, and another splash of blue now covered the wall. I felt a grin upon my lips. I spread some red on there as well before mixing the two colors it with my hands, creating a lovely hue of purple. I made a couple of large red flowers with a blue center.

The knot of anger was untying slowly in my stomach, and it was as if Anna was present for a short moment again. It helped.

As I was working on the stem, I heard a door slam shut.

"Elsa? What on earth are you doing?" I turned around, still wearing a smile, and saw my father. His expression was confused. He was standing in his uniform, a folder under his arm.

"Hey dad," I said happily. "Just decorating." I headed for the shower with a goofy grin, leaving the man speechless and confused in the living room.


	12. Clawy hot guys

**Chapter 12 – Clawy hot guys**

Our usual table was occupied at lunch. I stood with my tray of downright unappetizing food, that had the same appeal as cardboard, and probably similar texture. The cafeteria was filled to the brim with loud, hormonal, ridiculously immature teens, and I wondered if a zoo would be less chaotic.

Kristoff and Sven were both held up in class, so I'd had to settle for the only table left in the cafeteria. Unfortunately, that meant the table directly next to the Royals. I sighed heavily as I placed myself in one of the chairs by the empty table.

I shot one quick glance and at the beautiful redhead sitting among the Royals. Her face was so calm, and I immediately relaxed. A warm feeling spread to my entire body. She returned a hurried look, and I could see she was trying to suppress a smile. My face instantly went red, happy butterflies filling my stomach. I felt absolutely ludicrous as I could see the resemblance between me and some cliché awestruck and enamored teenage girl. With a book in hand that I pretended to read, I waited for Kristoff and Sven.

"I can't believe you got loser-freak-Elsa as your partner, bad luck huh?" Nala whispered to Anna.

Well, I wouldn't define it as whispering, I think she wanted me to hear. Anna and I had, to our delight, been chosen as partners for a project in mythology studies. However, Nala had felt the urge to express her disproval on Anna's behalf in front of the entire class.

Her eyes glanced up and down me, which confirmed my theory – she wanted me to hear. If you looked up 'bitch' in the dictionary, I was positive Nala's face would pop up as the definition. My grip tightened around the edges of the book. Shooting another glance towards the girls, my eyes settled across Nala's face. It annoyed me to see I hadn't left a mark on that nauseating face of hers. The wound above my eyebrow was still a heavy reminder of our disputes.

"You'll probably get a horrible grade as well," Nala giggled and winked at Anna. For a moment, I wished I had an Inspector Gadget arm, so I could launch a fist at her head from where I sat, and dry that tremendously annoying grin off of her face.

"Be nice," Anna ordered. Not sure if she was defending me, or just sick and tired of Nala's attitude. Then she turned around and shot me a compassionate smile, which made me believe for a moment that she maybe had defended me. Luckily, Sven and Kristoff came to my rescue, each carrying their tray with one hand, and a soda in the other.

"Maybe you should mind your own business Nala," Kristoff snapped, as he walked past their table. Nala just huffed, and went back to drinking her diet Coke, and eating nothing as usual. Kristoff, as protective and territorial as an older brother would be, sat down next to me, cutting off Nala, Anna and their group from my vision. Sven sat down on my other side, and started poking the tray's contents with a fork.

"You alright?" Kristoff asked, looking me straight in the eye. His chocolate brown eyes were worried, and his jaw was flexed. Sven pushed around the food on his tray, ruffling his hair with his other hand, to get that shaggy-rock-star look he so eagerly desired.

"Thanks guys, I appreciate it. But I can fight my own battles." Sven was quiet, eyeing us both carefully. Sven stayed out of it, but knowing Kristoff, he wouldn't be able to shut up when it came to the Royals and their grotesque way of treating people. Kristoff hated their act of superiority, and could hardly contain himself when conflict arose.

"So why don't you? Are you just going to let Nala insult you and bring you down like that? Elsa, come on..." This was another one of Kristoff's 'older brother' speeches. I hated when he got so overprotective.

"Kristoff please! Just leave it alone. I don't need this right now." I attracted a few judgemental gazes from the other tables, including some from the Royals' table, as I rose from my chair.

I scooped up my books and threw my bag over my shoulder, walking towards my next class even though there were several minutes until the tardy bell rang. I didn't feel like making a scene, but I couldn't stay and listen to Kristoff acting on his testosterone, playing this dominating male character that wasn't really him. It suited him though.

I didn't make it to the classroom before the nearly-mental-breakdown kicked in, so I rushed to the girl's room.

By the extravagant force of my willpower the tears were held back. What was I so upset over? Did Nala finally get to me? No, it wasn't that. That girl could insult me as much as she wanted, she couldn't touch me.

_It's just the pressure_, my subconscious told me.

The first basketball game was tomorrow, and I hadn't been doing very well at keeping my nerves at ease. I had left my father a note on the counter about the game, giving him a time and a place.

After the food-colour incident, we hadn't spoken much. He wasn't angry, not the slightest actually, just highly confused, and thought I was being immature. Well, that's what I gathered from his silence anyway. After that, he completely ignored the incident, one of his typical moves: ignoring things until they disappeared. I looked down at my hands, which still held traces of food-colouring.

"Are you alright?" A voice asked from the entrance to the bathroom. Anna stood by the doorway, door closed. My heart started racing. I thanked God this wasn't Tell Tale Heart because I was almost positive she could hear the aggressive pounding of my heart.

"Yeah," I said, standing there like a total moron just looking at her, stunned by her caring, "yeah, I'm great." My voice betrayed me though.

She took a few strides towards me. Looking at me with her turquoise eyes, she tilted her head a bit, sending me a knowingly smile. She raised a hand and placed her palm against my cheek. Her face was close; I could almost count her freckles.

"No you're not," she said, hand caressing my cheek. "You're doing the hand thing again."

I looked down to see my fingers fiddled together. I sighed, leaning my head into her touch. She looked at me with such concern, with such caring, I could barely handle it. Her arms snaked around me. It filled me with a sense of security, her arms wrapped around me as they were now, made me feel sheltered from everything bad that could ever happen to me.

"What's bothering you? What is Nala?"

"I don't really know," I admitted. "I guess it's just everything, Nala, the game, Kristoff playing hero…it's all a bit much," I said embarrassed.

All Anna could do was smile one of her glorious reassuring smiles. She never failed to settle whatever was stirring nervously in my stomach. She was now playing with a strand of hair, before pushing it back over my head where it belonged. She gave me a light kiss on the nose.

"You're going to do great on the game tomorrow," she said pulling me into to a hug. My head rested on her shoulder. "I'll be there to cheer you on. It's all gonna to be fine."

We pulled apart when we heard footsteps approaching. I was pretending to wash my hands, and Anna was on her way out as Belle walked into the bathroom. Anna mouthed 'text me' before leaving with her signature crooked smile. I couldn't help but smile at the silly girl. Correction: I couldn't help but smile at my silly girlfriend. The thought made me smile. Texting and talking to Anna over the last couple of days, since our kiss in my apartment, had made things seem different.

Worth it.

I was starting to get comfortable with the term 'girlfriend,' even though I still wasn't entirely sure on what we were. I hadn't asked Anna what she thought we were, I don't think I was ready for that.

Of course, all of this was only between Anna and me. I couldn't imagine what would happen if people knew about us. Especially my father. On Anna's behalf, she would probably lose her reputation.

Belle came out of one of the stalls, and I realized I'd been washing my hands for at least five minutes. I quickly dried them off and aimed for the door.

"Good luck with the game tomorrow, make sure to get some rest," Belle said politely.

I grabbed an even tighter grip on my shoulder bag; my palms got sweaty.

"Thank you. I will," suppressing the urge to flinch as she mentioned the game. Suddenly the nausea was back.

Even more expectations to fill.

* * *

><p>After the first two classes after lunch, I felt like I was in a trance – mesmerized by the daily stress that was my life. I sighed heavily as I grabbed my history book out of my locker.<p>

"Rough day?" Sven asked from behind my locker door. I was startled by his presence, and jumped at the sound of his voice. His eyebrows were knitted together. A pang of guilt hit me as I looked at him. I didn't mean to snap at Kristoff, the two of them only wanted to protect me – how could I get mad about that? I opened my mouth, but closed it again, when no sound came out. I tried again, tried to find the words.

"Sven..." I started, but couldn't finish.

"I know he can get overprotective at times," Sven started, "but he means well." The tone of his voice was so sympathetic, I could barely stand it.

"I didn't mean to..."

"I know," he said, cutting me off. "I know."

I closed my locker and smiled at him. Sven really was a sweet guy, probably the kind of guy my father would appreciate (apart from his, at times, vulgar sense of humour, I'd deem him perfect).

He saw the book in my hand.

"Let me walk you to history," he held out his arm like a gentleman, and we walked together, arm in arm, to history. Sven started goofing around a bit, pretending he was some sort of royalty, referring to me as 'my lady' and bowing to random people as they walked by; people were giving us weird stares. I caught sight of Anna from the corner of my eye, and suddenly I didn't want to walk arm in arm with Sven anymore.

_She might get the wrong idea,_ the superstitious part of my subconscious thought. No, Anna wouldn't get the wrong idea – she knew Sven and I were only friends, didn't she? When I saw she stifled a laugh at Sven's act, I knew I was right. However, I couldn't help but wish that it was her arm hooked in mine, instead of Sven's.

* * *

><p><strong>Anna<strong> [20:30]: _You busy?_

**Elsa** [20:32]: _not particularly, y?_

**Anna** [20:32]: _Your dad home?_

**Elsa** [20:32]: _no…?_

**Anna** [20:33]: _Good, now answer your friggin door, im freezing out here!_

I went to the front door, and surely there Anna stood, wrapping her army-green jacket closely around her torso. She was holding a silver thermostat in one hand, and a DVD in the other.

"Hey!" Anna said happily, trying to hide her shivering.

"Anna, what're yo-?"

"Don't worry, I don't plan on making it a habit to come unannounced. You just seemed really upset today at lunch, and I thought I would help you think of something else, you know, forget about tomorrows' game for bit," the girl quickly explained. "I brought hot chocolate and I thought we could watch a movie," she said smiling brightly.

My heart grew soft looking at the redhead. I quickly pulled her inside before she froze her butt off; I'd noticed Anna and cold weather wasn't a very good combination. Therefore I grabbed a bunch of blankets and two mugs, before heading back to the couch where Anna sat, making herself comfortable. She had plucked in the movie, and was watching the first few commercials on the disc, waiting for me to arrive with the blankets. As soon as I'd poured us two steamy hot mugs of hot chocolate, Anna dragged me under the blanket with her, capturing me in her loving embrace. I giggled as the girl tried to cover us both with one blanket.

"So, what're we watching?" I asked, honestly not really caring – we could watch a documentary about potatoes for all I cared – as long as I was lying next to Anna.

"X-Men," she stated absentminded as she was fiddling with the settings on the DVD. She really was a dork.

"I figured I didn't really know what kind of movies were into, but then I thought who doesn't like blue ladies and clawy hot guys!" I stifled a laugh, taking a sip of chocolate.

"You had me at clawy hot guys," I said putting down my cup.

It was quiet for a while as we watched the very beginning of the movie. Anna had snuggled up behind me, making me the little spoon. I was impressed by how quickly I had gotten accustomed to the girl's touch. It took me several weeks to get used to Sven and Kristoff nudging, hugging and budding into me on purpose all the time – not that it had stopped them, however, I never really fully got around to returning their gestures.

But with Anna it was just so easy. In fact, she had me longing for her touch, hoping some of her warm spirit would rub off on me. Her hand was resting on my waist. Anna cleared her throat, snapping me out of my train of thought.

"So…you also like guys?" she mumbled clearly having caught on to the 'hot guy' joke, perhaps reading excessively into it.

Not that I didn't do the same on a daily basis, overthinking everything, though I hadn't thought of Anna as such – an over-thinker. She seemed so spontaneous and carefree at times. I admired that about her. Though, something told me she was every bit as new to this as I was - she was just better at hiding it.

I couldn't help but clearing my throat as well. The question had taken me by surprise, and I was glad Anna couldn't look me in the eye.

"Well, yeah. I think so at least," I said, trying to sound resolute. "I don't know," I sighed, and sat up. My elbows rested on my knees, and I started massaging my temples with my fingertips. Anna sat up as well, putting and arm around my shoulder.

"It's fine if you do, I was just curious," the girl stated. She grabbed one of my hands to stop me from rubbing the sides of my head.

"I don't know anything… all I know is that I like you," I said.

"That's good enough for me," Anna stated happily. We laid back down, my head resting on her arm. I could feel Anna's eyes on me, she was looking at my hair, my eyes, my lips, simply just observing me as I tried focusing on the movie.

Her hand was stroking my hair, gently, almost with a feather-like touch really. Without any warning, she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek. I felt a blush creep on, covering my cheeks and nose. Anna noticed, and smiled, grazing a thumb over my heated cheeks.

I readjusted myself, turning myself onto my back, and Anna was staring down at me with those big beautiful eyes of hers.

"So…," Anna started, and I could see was considering whether she should continue. "Have you ever….you know…with a guy?" She asked. My cheeks were on fire now, oh goodness, this was unexpected.

I assumed Anna wasn't a virgin, she did say Hans had wanted sex up against a tree that night, and I figured that wasn't exactly something you did your first time.

I snuggled in closer to her, resting my head on her chest, so she couldn't see my face which was burning up.

"I have… once," I stated. Anna said nothing, but led a hand to my back to stroke it gently.

"W-what about you?"

Anna seemed completely fine with the question, although I didn't know if I would like the answer. After all, I hardly doubted she was a virgin, but there was just something about Anna confirming said assumption that had me feel strange.

"Well, yeah, I mean, Hans and I dated for quite some time. I haven't with anyone else though," she spoke and pulled me even closer. Then she wiggled herself further down so we were face to face. Her hands shot up and caressed my cheek again, and she smiled, before reaching over to kiss my nose. How could she be so relaxed about this?

"But I've never done anything with a girl before…. Not even a kiss," she whispered.

I don't know what came over me, maybe I wanted to be spontaneous for once, so I leaned over and gently planted a soft kiss on her lips. It didn't last long, but boy were there fireworks and explosions going on inside of my head.

She didn't try anything further though, maybe apart from sneaking a hand around me to rest at the small of my back. Gently, she massaged the naked skin above the edge of my jeans where my shirt and pants parted.

We didn't touch further upon the topic of intimacy. Instead we just got to know each other.

"What's your favourite place on earth? You can choose anywhere," she challenged.

_Right here in your arms,_ I thought, though I denied to verbalize it, since I thought it might sound a tad needy.

It was a tough question really, there weren't many places I particularly enjoyed visiting as such.

"There is one place…," I mumbled and pushed an invisible strand of hair behind my ear. "There's this mountain in Norway I used to visit whenever I was sad or needed to get away. It's way up north, and you can only really get there on foot. The view is amazing, and the air is so fresh. I wish I could show you," I murmured. Anna hummed, as she imagined the Norwegian landscapes as I tried to describe them with the best of my ability.

"What about you? Where's your favourite place on earth?" I challenged back with a mischievous smirk.

The girl didn't hesitate when she said, "right here in your arms," and my heart melted for the thousandth time that day.

I guess I could learn a thing or two about just speaking my mind.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Thank you for all your love and support! Your reviews means the world to me.

Until next time!


	13. Game Day

**Chapter 13 – Game day**

I thought about asking Anna to stay the night, but since we had both agreed to take things slow, and see where they led us, I decided against it. It was past midnight, and Anna was eager to leave so that I could get some rest before the big game tomorrow, however, I dearly wanted her to stay, and just curl back up on the sofa.

The redhead insisted though, saying she wouldn't risk coach Gothel ripping her head off for keeping her star-player up late the night before a big game. We both laughed at the mental image of the coach pacing back and forth, vein popping out the side of her head, for then to throw her clipboard to the ground in fury.

She kissed me goodnight by the door, a hesitant and shy kiss, careful not to overstep any boundaries. I still couldn't get over the softness of her lips. This time the girl didn't taste of booze and cigarettes, but more like the sweet scent that naturally coated her.

Taking a second, I breathed the girl in. The smell of peaches and honey hit my nostrils once again. It was more than that though. Her smell brought all sorts of associations with them, like the smell of newly cut grass, the smell of cinnamon and apples. Even in the cold, the girl smelled like summer – which I thought fit perfectly, since Anna earlier had expressed her utter loathing of cold weather and winter.

"What about snow?" I asked curiously, wondering if a person really could despise _everything_ that associated with winter. She thought about it for a second.

"I like snow, snow is fun," she concluded. "Snow can stay," she said, as she was some sort of weather-goddess. She laid her head on my lap, X-Men slowly turning into background noise.

"Imagine building snowmen in the summer – now that would be spectacular."

"See, now I think you're purposely trying to spoil the concept of winter. You're underestimating the wonders winter can bring."

"If by 'wonders' you mean icicle-death-traps and relentless butt-freezing, then no, I don't think I have misjudged the concept of winter."

"_Now_ you're just being stubborn. Winter has its perks, as summer has its perks. You got to take the good with the bad, or else the seasons wouldn't be fairly arranged," I tried, surely knowing the girl had a gift with words, and she probably could make removing a tattoo with a grader sound appealing.

Anna simply looked up at me sending her signature smile, before nuzzling her cheek into my stomach.

"You make a valid point Ms. Vinter, I will take the thought into further speculation, and let you know if you've changed my mind."

I laughed at Anna's formality, sending her a victory-smile. We stayed like this for while, until she dreadfully decided she had to be heading home.

Now, as we stood in the hallway saying our goodbyes, my mind suddenly became worried whether I could deal with Anna's absence the remainder of the night. Luckily, I felt much more at ease than I had the last time the younger girl had visited.

As the elevator doors closed, I shot a quick glance to the food-colour flowers still on the wall. They were calming, soothing even. Luckily, the living room had been too dark for Anna to notice them, really not feeling the urge to explain their sudden presence.

I got ready for bed, waiting in anticipation for Anna to text me that she had arrived home safe and sound. The familiar buzz on my nightstand soothed my nerves, and I opened the text from Anna.

Anna (00:21): _Almost broke my tail bone from the car to my house – summer wins._

Elsa (00:21):_ What did you expect?! You slipped on ice!_

Anna (00.22):_ It tried to kill me!_

Elsa (00:22): _That's what you get for being stubborn._

Anna (00:22): _Goodnight beautiful ;)_

Elsa (00:22):_ Goodnight :)_

* * *

><p>The sun had yet to rise when I got out of bed. Sleep was an intricate affair, and was hardly manageable with thoughts racing through my mind. Every worst-case-scenario imaginable was replaying in my head about the next day's game. I wondered if resting would have been simpler with Anna's arms wrapped around me. Finally, I decided to give up on sleep, and simply hoped that I could run on pure adrenaline during the four quarters.<p>

As I walked around the kitchen restlessly while eating my cereal, I noticed a note on the kitchen counter. It was the same note I had left for my father with the time and place for today's game. Underneath my own sloppy handwriting, I saw a neat couple of cursive letters lined up into a small sentence, beautifully tangled together. It was my father's handwriting. I stopped chewing for a second, disregarding the giant mouthful of cereal resting on my tongue.

"_Ok, see you there,_" the note spoke.

I nearly choked on the mouthful of cereal, almost causing the milk to spurt out my nose. Not fully comprehending the words I had just read, I picked up the tiny piece of paper to study it more carefully. True enough, it was my father's handwriting. After taking in the information, I couldn't get one more spoonful of cereal down. I left the apartment feeling nauseas and anxious.

The progression of the day was slow – painfully slow. I found myself more than once standing by my locker, pretending to be fiddling with some papers and notebooks, to avoid having to look people in the eye.

Spiderman was hanging in his usual spot, flinging his web into nothingness. Nostalgically, I gave him the usual mini-high five, afraid to jinx the entire game if I didn't.

The school bubbled with excitement and team spirit. Apparently, we were meeting our rival school – Weselton High School – which so far had gone undefeated in the tournament. To say losing would be a disaster, would be an understatement according to the student body.

Students were getting pumped with exhilaration, and pupils were slowly gathering at the gym after their last classes to get some decent seats. Not that the common interest laid in girls' basketball, the guys typically stole our crowd. However, this time the games were not synchronised, giving the audience the opportunity to watch both games. At the end of the day, my stomach had tied a knot on itself, and I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast. Sure, I was hydrated, at least keeping me from passing out on the court.

The girl's locker room was empty. I was half an hour early. As the minutes passed I slowly pulled on my purple jersey, number 43 flashing on the back, with the name 'Vinter' written in white letters above it.

Suddenly, I found myself sitting on the bench next to Merida, while coach Gothel gave us her encouraging (and somewhat threatening) reprimand. Trying to convince myself that this was just like any of our friendly practice games, my nerves slowly came at ease. However, when our team entered the gym, and I heard the roar from the crowd, I'd never felt more nervous in my life.

The next thing I knew I'm standing on the court, audience roaring in the background, getting ready for the tip-off. My coach was standing on the side-line waving her arms like a maniac, calling out different plays.

A short black haired girl on the opponent team eyed me carefully, I assumed she was their point guard. As soon as I walked to the center of the court, everything seemed to disappear. It was as if someone had taken a remote control, and muted the audience. Suddenly, it was only me and the other center, getting ready for the jump-ball. She had a sloppy posture, but had a strong advantage topping me 10 centimetres. I considered myself moderately tall, but compared to this girl I was a midget. She was big boned, and had a couple of kilos on me.

The whistle was blown, and the referee threw the ball up high.

"Steady Vinter!" Coach Gothel screamed at the top of her lungs, penetrating my bubble of concentration. I did what I was told though, and waited half a second to jump. The other girl was already in the air, miscalculating the height of the ball. I swooped in and stole the ball, throwing it to Merida, who played forward, and made a terrific layup.

From there on everything went smoothly until halftime. My blood sugar was running dangerously low from not eating. I was feeling lightheaded, and needed to sit down. I grabbed a seat on the bench, while all the other girls were off discussing highlights of the first part of the game.

"You alright there Vinter? Looking a little pale," my coach asked. I nodded, suddenly feeling drowsy. I turned my head looking at the audience. There were barely any seats left. The chance of me getting eye contact with my father was one in a billion. I seriously considered getting a good-luck charm, because for just a few second I locked eyes with my father. His facial expression looking highly judgemental. And right behind him, Anna was sitting next to Nala. She looked over this way, but we didn't get eye contact. By pure reflex I put my head between my legs. I felt like I was going to be sick.

All of a sudden a hand had a firm grip on my shoulder, pulling me up into an upright position.

"Here eat this," my coach said, handing me a Snickers bar.

"No," I mumbled, "I'm fine."

"You are not fine, take the damn bar," she nearly stuffed the chocolate bar into my palm. A feeling of agitation grew upon me, and it felt like my stomach was filled with bricks. I dreadfully wanted to devour the whole thing in one mouthful, but my body wouldn't stop fighting it. Every cell in my body repelled the delicious treat, melting in my hand.

"I can't," I said, holding a hand to my forehead. I was afraid I would start hyperventilating.

"Eat the damn bar Vinter, I need you on the court in five!"

My hands started shaking. _My life is ruined,_ I thought as I looked over at my father, impatiently checking the time on his Rolex wristwatch.

"Maybe I can help coach," a familiar voice said.

"Be my guest," Coach said, all out of hope.

Kristoff kneeled next to me, opening up a small lunchbox. He carefully picked out a piece of apple, and stuffed it in my mouth. _God bless you Kristoff_, was my thought as I sat dizzy and quietly chewing with my eyes closed.

"Thank you," I said. I wanted to say more, it didn't feel like 'thank you' would cover my gratitude towards the boy. Kristoff read my expression, and send me a brotherly smile.

"Kristoff, I'm sorr-" I started, but his interrupted me before I could finish.

"Don't worry about it. I shouldn't have butted in like that yesterday."

A lump got stuck in my throat, it was like a knot of guilt trying to suffocate me.

_Oh Kristoff… you're way too good to me._

If only he knew I was fooling around with the girl he'd been love his entire hormone-loaded adolescent life.

"Go kick butt," Kristoff said and ruffled my hair. The buzz from the scoreboard sounded, and Coach Gothel practically grasped me by the shirt, and threw me on the court. I suddenly felt vulnerable and fragile, as the huge girl from the tip-off was towering over me.

It was our ball. We were leading by two points. Belle dribbled the ball to me, and I was running for a layup. It would have looked great, if it hadn't been for that tiny black haired girl. She snatched the ball from me as I was entering their zone. There was no way I could have caught up with her before she reached our hoop and won her team two points. Coach Gothel went berserk, screaming at me from the side-line.

_Don't look! Don't look!_

But I couldn't help it. There my father sat, wearing his stone face, rubbing his temples. The anger bubbled from within me, blood sugar or not, I couldn't let it slide. It was their ball, and I called a zone defence.

"Belle, switch with me!" I demanded my left wing.

"Elsa, what are you doing!?"

I didn't answer; I just swiftly took her spot, and made sure she covered mine. The big boned girl was in possession of the ball. She was left-handed; making it obvious, seeing her struggling dribbling with her right hand, she would attack from the left side. She was picking up pace, dribbling more intensely. She was coming right at me, with no intention to slow down. Instead of moving, my arms shot straight up while I was stiffening my whole body, not moving, letting her foul me.

Her elbow was planted right in my chest, smashing all oxygen out of my system, knocking me to the ground. Grasps sounded from the audience, and then the satisfying sound of a whistle.

"Foul on blue player 3-8, shooting two," the referee stated.

Coach started yelling all kinds of nice things about me, and the whole school was cheering, especially Anna. I couldn't help but smile a little bit. The other team was giving me death glares, but with only two minutes left of the games, and me getting two foul shots nothing could beat me down. I made both my shots, and the crowd went wild. As the cherry on top I shot a three pointer, assuring us victory. The score buzzed for the last time, and for the first time that day, I felt like I could breathe.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I thought Elsa needed a win :) I know this chapter was a bit short, but the next will be out this weekend :) The next couple of chapters will mostly be cute Elsanna, developing their relationship :) But loads of bumps in the roads to come!

Stay cool!


	14. One fish, two fishes

**Chapter 14 – One fish, two fishes**

Things started to take a turn for the better after the game. Leading the team to victory had landed me a spot as team captain. Coach Gothel was impressed, but she held me on a tight leash as she noticed I had a mind of my own (let us just assume that not everyone on the team was particularly satisfied with my 'switching positions in the heat of the moment'-technique).

I knew I had acted impulsively and perhaps irrationally, but it was a chance that I had had to take – especially with my father in the audience.

We had driven home in separate cars, however, he did approach me before I got into the driver's seat. I'd felt a slight tap on my shoulder. There he stood, shoulders pushed back, and chest shot out.

"I must say Elsa, I'm impressed. I didn't know you had it in you," my father said, his voice not missing a beat. Not with a smile. Not with much facial expression actually. I'd never heard words like those leave his mouth. It sounded artificial in sense, but I'd take his praise any day.

"T-thank you dad," I replied, angry that it came out as a stutter. We stood in a long awkward silence after that. It didn't seem to bother my father much, but to me it was a rather uncomfortable forty-seven seconds, still counting.

"I'll see you at home," he finally said before walking off.

_So this it what it feels like? Having a person be proud of you?_

School seemed like an entirely different place now. People were, to some extent, almost friendly in the hallway. I was surely, but slowly, regaining some of my lost honour from the set-up with Simon, and the ass whipping I received from Nala (even though, in my defence, I got in a good punch).

And things with Anna couldn't be better. Anna and I had secret meeting-spots at different times of the day. For example under the staircase on the third floor before first period, or behind the dumpsters in the schoolyard after P.E.

Kristoff and I were on good terms again, even though I could not help the guilt that had a tendency to appear whenever I caught him looking longingly at Anna.

Sven was his dorky old self, and the kiss we had shared was almost completely forgotten, and buried in the past. It had been several days since my last breakdown, almost a new personal record for me. Everything seemed to have fallen into place after the game, and for a second I allowed myself to enjoy it.

I was meeting Anna in the girl's bathroom in the school basement in two minutes. Making sure I wasn't being followed, I swiftly ran down the stairs in long hurried strides. The bubbly feeling I felt whenever I was meeting Anna was starting to arise inside my chest. My heart almost swelled to twice size when I finally opened the door to the bathroom and the redhead was sitting on counter of the sinks, dangling her legs back and forth.

She sat with both hands gripping firmly onto the counter, her shoulders up to her ears. The auburn twin braids hung loosely over her shoulders. She was wearing a checkered green bottom-down shirt. Her brown boots were laced to just above the angle, revealing their white wool lining. Her jeans, tight as usual, was as black as coal.

I stood in the doorway, letting myself drink in the perfection of the figure in front of me. Anna send me a crooked smile, tilting her head ever so slightly. Her feet stopped dangling back and forth, and she relaxed her shoulders.

"Are you gonna stand out there all day, or are you going to come and kiss me hello?"

With one quick glance over the shoulder, I closed the door, and walked towards the smug-faced redhead. Slowly I walked towards her, teasingly.

We hadn't had a chance to see each other all day, nor the day before, due to a math retake on my behalf. I placed myself between the girl's knees, as she happily made room for me. Then she leaned forward and placed a lingering kiss gracefully upon my lips. Our hands intertwined, and as we parted, she leaned her forehead against mine. Anna was the one to break the silence.

"So, I was thinking…" she started, pausing before continuing.

"Don't brag," I snickered. Anna just smiled, probably proud I had started picking up on her mordant sense of humour.

"Ha-ha, very funny," she said sarcastically. Her thumb caressed my hand. Her touch was breath-taking, no one had ever made me feel this way, and her warmth seemed to become addicting.

"I thought it was time we went on a proper date," she said, lifting her head off my forehead, eyes now meeting. Her smile dropped, and she looked me fiercely in the eye. Anna was suddenly so serious, as if she suspected that I would actually be able to turn down such a gorgeous face.

"What did you have in mind?" I smiled reassuringly, at once growing curious.

"You'll see," she smirked.

"Should I be scared?"

"Terrified," Anna grinned mischievously, before catching my lips with hers.

* * *

><p>It was Saturday morning and Anna was picking me up at two. Gerda had just left, after finishing tidying up the place. She gave me a wink and bade me goodbye, reminding me of our dinner the following Wednesday where I had promised to cook for her. I said I wouldn't forget and practically pushed her out the door.<p>

The air was humid, and had the whole city in-capsuled in an uncomfortable heat bubble. It was going to rain, I could tell by the pressure. The air was thick. The clouds were hanging low, and had a claustrophobic effect. It was like being trapped. As if the clouds pushed you to the ground, trying to crush you.

For some reason I was nervous. Anna and I spend a lot of time together, and texted, but this was different. This was our first date – it was all so official. It was all so new and scary to me. _Oh shit! Should I have bought flowers? Do people still do that?_ Thoughts rushed through my head, confirming that I truly had no idea what a proper date looked like now a days.

The doorbell rang just as I was done braiding my hair. I had decided to wear a black turtle neck sweater, and a dark coloured skirt that reached just above the knees – simple and sophisticated. Anna had told me we weren't going anywhere formal, but you could never be too prepared.

_Maybe it's too much?_

It was too late to change now. With a heavy exhale, I took one last long glance in the mirror, before walking to the door. Looking through the peek hole (lone girl could never be too careful), I saw Anna. She was glancing down the hallway, balancing herself on the balls of her feet, with her arms folded on her back. Slowly I creaked open the door, peeking my head out. A toothless smile spread across the redheads lips.

"Hey," she said, her eyes beaming with joy. At the same time, I'd never seen her this nervous. The girl was blushing, and fiddling with the zipper of her coat.

"Hey," I said, opening the door just enough for the redhead to slip in. "I'm not entirely ready yet."

"Oh," Anna said, face dropping. "I'm not going to have to sit down and wait while your dad gives me a reprimand, am I?" She whispered.

I giggled as Anna's eyes darted around the living room for any sign of my father. Her hair was in a messy bun, and she was wearing her typical jeans and snickers with another checkered bottom-down shirt, this time blood red instead of green.

"He's not home," I snickered as Anna's shoulders dropped and the girl relaxed. I went to my room to grab a few things, and came back to Anna admiring _the_ wall. The wall with my food-colour flowers.

Even though the colours were slowly fading, and the flowers had started crackling, leaving small dry flakes of colour that with a whiff of a breath could make them detach sending them flying across the living room, I still found Anna mumbling precious things about my flowers.

"They're beautiful," she whispered in awe. "Did you make these?" She looked at me, her mouth slightly open. I nodded, folding my hands in front of me, and biting me bottom lip.

"Elsa, they're amazing," she continued. She took a step closer. Then I saw her trying to restrain a laugh.

"Is this food-colouring?" She smirked.

I nodded again. Anna turned at me questioningly. Sighing heavily I walked towards her, to stand next to her. My finger swiped across the surface of the wall, and a dusty layer of red settled on my fingers.

"I was just so…angry," I found myself whispering.

Normally I wouldn't let anyone know. Know about this anger, this emptiness inside of me. Nevertheless, the words were spilling, and I couldn't stop them. Anna frowned, but knew better than to interrupt.

"It was the only thing we had laying around; I wasn't thinking – I mean, jeez, it might even attract bugs at some point," I laughed. Anna laughed as well, but it was forced, I could tell. She grabbed my hand, squeezing it lightly.

"It's amazing how such beautiful things can come out of anger," she said now looking at me. Her thumb was stroking my hand gently. I'd never looked at it that way – creating beauty from hate. The two were nearly opposites, but at the same time rather similar.

"I guess you're right," I said with a pleased smile. I planted a quick peck on the girl's cheek, and watched as the blood rushed to her head.

"You ready to go?" I asked after a while.

She nodded, and we walked hand in hand towards the door.

* * *

><p>As we sat in the car, the first couple of raindrops started to fall upon the windshield. The moment Anna turned on the engine, music started playing. It was the same thing that had been playing that night Anna drove me home from the set-up-date with Simon.<p>

"Ah, shit, keep forgetting that," Anna exclaimed, as she reached over to change the music. I stopped her hand before she reached the button.

"Leave it," I said giving her a happy smile, "it's soothing."

Anna lit up even more, if that was possible. She pulled away from the curb, and soon we were on the road, on our way out of the city.

The temperature dropped immediately as the rain settled in large puddles on the side of the road. Breathing became easier, and I let the cool fresh air fill my lungs. Luckily, it was warm and cosy in the car thanks to Anna. She had noticed the Goosebumps rising on my arm, and had given me her green jacket. It smelled like her, and I happily wrapped it around my shoulders. Our hands were resting between our seats, lazily intertwined. We drove for at least thirty minutes. Anna had her other hand on the wheel. She was looking at the road, and I was looking at her.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked her, observing her as she concentrated on the road.

"About you and me," she stated casually, without much thought.

"You and me?"

"Yeah. You know, world domination with you by my side. All that usual relationshippy kind of stuff."

I laughed, bringing her hand up to my lips to kiss her palm. Anna smiled, clearly happy with herself. After a few moments, we pulled into a large parking lot. There weren't many cars to our surprise, and to our delight. First, when I saw the huge engraved letters on the building it hit me.

"The aquarium?"

"Yeah. This is one of my favourite places. I'm pretty sure no one from school knows about this. Just wait until you see it from the inside, it's absolutely astonishing."

Her eyes sparkled with excitement. I couldn't get over the fact that she was showing me her favourite spot – it made me feel so… special.

Anna insisted on buying the tickets. I tried to convince her that it really wasn't necessary, but with no luck. As we entered, the light dimmed, and everything became a shade of blue from the reflection of the massive tanks of water.

There were at least ten metres to the ceiling if not more. The light shining through the waters helped light up the shady setting. It was almost magical the way the light penetrated the surface of the water, and shone through the massive tank.

Anna read the admiration on my face, and pulled me closer. Seeing the wonderment in my face made the girl relax. She stopped fiddling with her zipper completely, and her shoulders dropped. I couldn't help but think how special this must have been for Anna since she had been that nervous about showing me. As she pulled me in, a large petrifying shark swam across the scene of corals, followed by a small steam of fish.

"That's a Sand Tiger Shark. They aren't aggressive, but look rather vicious with all those teeth sticking out," Anna explained calmly. She grabbed my hand and pulled me further into the wonders of the ocean.

The girl was like a walking lexicon, throwing facts here and there about all the different species and types of sea creatures we passed. It was tremendously fascinating, and I found that I could listen to Anna talk all day. She sounded so passionate when she explained about global warming and how the rise of temperature would increase the population of female sea turtles. At one point, we settled on a bench deep within the aquarium.

"You see that one?" She pointed towards a long slender figure behind the wall of glass. It was a green sea snake, which was moving in smooth strides along the glass, as if it was flying through the water.

"That's probably one of the most poisonous sea snakes on earth. It's not aggressive though, unless you provoke it. The thing is, it's very inquisitive, but also extremely forgetful. If in an ocean, it's very likely to swim towards divers because it's curious. What divers do is put their flippers up under its nose, because it hates the smell of rubber. It swims away, but comes back almost immediately, since its memory only lasts like ten seconds."

A small crowd of people walked by, mumbling quietly to themselves.

"You seem to know a lot about this stuff,"

"I try," Anna said leaning a bit towards me. Our shoulders bumped together, and our hands were both wrapped around the edge of the bench. They nearly touched. My fingers tingled from the thought of grasping Anna's hand. I couldn't get myself to do it.

Anna cleared her throat.

"That's what I wanna do," she said, her eyes looking down at my hand, so close, yet so far away. "I want to study marine biology... perhaps conservation of marine ecosystems," she continued, looking back at the snake that was still working it's way through the water.

"I think you would be terrific at it," I answered, trying to catch her eyes. "Where are you planning on going?"

Anna didn't look me in the eye, but kept staring at the snake.

"Oh, there's the community college in town. It's only fifteen minutes away by car…" she said but trailed off.

After listening to Anna's excited voice all day, I noticed the lack of enthusiasm when she talked about college. I huffed.

"With your grades I'm sure you could get into Harvard or something," I said. Anna's grip tightened slightly around the bench, it was hardly noticeable. She snorted.

"I don't think I'm smart enough for Harvard," her voice was teasing now. Finally catching her eyes, I held onto them in a serious stare.

"Anna, you're probably the smartest person I know. Heck, you're probably the smartest student at school."

She looked back at me with her dreamy teal eyes. Her dimples grew deep as the edges of her mouth hoisted in a grin. We sat in silence for a while, just looking at each other. Her mouth was so perfect, lips so full and pink. What I would have given to kiss the corner of her mouth at that very second, but my grasp on the bench seemed to tighten at the thought, restraining myself to fulfil the action.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked.

I hesitated.

"That I really want to kiss you."

"What's stopping you?"

"People…"

"People?"

I glanced over the redhead's shoulder, seeing the small crowd of people fascinated by a turtle passing by them.

"Too many people."

"Why is that stopping you?"

"People have eyes Anna," I said, stating the obvious.

The strawberry blonde didn't seem to take offence in it. She knew I needed time. Everything was still confusing, but if one thing was clear from today, it was that Anna was my girlfriend. I had come to terms with it, and slowly adjusted to the idea that I was gay. Or at least gay-ish.

After the realizing of my feelings for Anna, I had stopped pushing them away, and taken a long and reflective look at my life. I had noticed that even in my young years I had more times than often paid more attention to the female protagonist than the male in movies. It really hit me when I remembered a time I had told my mother that I was in love with the neighbour's daughter. She had not read much into it, me being six and all.

"So… does your dad mind you use his walls as a canvas?" Anna asked playfully. I couldn't help but laugh a little – she made it sound as crazy as it was.

"Nah, he doesn't mind much in general," I mumbled, trying to supress a smile.

"What do you mean?" Anna asked, her little finger lifting, and carefully stroking mine. The butterflies were back now, fluttering with insane force inside my stomach.

"He leaves me be, most of the time. We don't talk very often… not that he is home very often to talk to either," I explained. "I was a little surprised he didn't mind. He can be quite the perfectionist."

"I see," Anna said. "It sounds rather lonely."

"It can be."

Her little finger was now accompanied by her ring finger, and she was slowly sneaking her hand on top of mine. It made me smile, but at the same time, made my stomach curl. All those people, they were merely a few metres away. Anna send me a look. A look that said, "_Screw them." _A look that was so intriguing and shameless I almost stopped worrying.

"Tell me about your mother Elsa," Anna instructed in a serous voice. This was getting way too intimate, way too fast.

_Relax Elsa, why is it so difficult to share your feelings? Anna wouldn't judge, you know that._

"There's not much to say really. I don't remember a whole lot about her. I remember that I loved her."

"Do you miss her?"

"Dearly."

"Are you angry with her?"

I thought about it for a while.

It was so rare I got the chance to talk about my mother. My father had blocked her out completely after she left, leaving little room for the mentioning of her. He was angry, and I understood why. However, in his eyes, my mother was a monster, and if he ever told me I reminded him of my mother, it would be an insult.

"Yes," I confessed. I was not going to lie to Anna, that wouldn't be right, no matter how uncomfortable her questions made me.

"But I'm sure she had her reasons." _Me being one of them_.

"You're not curious of why she left?"

Of course I was curious. Who wouldn't be? But there were other questions I'd rather want answers to.

"It's not as much as why she did it. It's more how? _How_ could she leave her child? That's the one that bothers me the most."

"What would you say to your mother right now, if you had the chance?"

"I-I wouldn't know, I've never given it much thought," I stuttered, surprised how bold Anna could be. I wasn't sure if I liked it very much. But then again, it also bothered me not having anyone to talk to about this.

"Now that's a lie," Anna stated knowingly, raising an eyebrow in disbelief.

And it was. It was thick messy lie that ate me up. Of course, I had planned a whole speech for what I would say to my mother if I ever got the chance.

"A-Anna, I'm not sure if it's appropriate here," was all I could muster, even though the group was leaving; leaving us alone in the massive room.

"Elsa," she covered my hand with hers, her warmth spreading to my core. "Just trust me." Her eyes were almost begging. "It helps," she finally said. I took a deep breath, weighing my words carefully.

"'You made me," I spoke, as if my mother could her me. I looked up towards the ceiling, talking to the sky, because I knew that was the only mutual thing we shared. We were under the same sky. On the same planet. "I'm half you, and half another person. When you left, it felt like I was ripped into two pieces.'"

Now Anna picked up both of my hands and held them close to her chest. Her eyes looking at me intensely. Another group of people entered the room.

"Oh, Elsa…" she started but lost the words. For some reason I felt better… relieved in a way.

"Don't worry," I interrupted before she could start again. "I think I'm slowly coming together again."

Sending her a smile, I leaned over and put a strand of hair behind her ear before kissing her.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Terribly sorry about the delay, I simply haven't had good enough internet to upload - it was pretty much impossible. Thanks for your patience. Goodness you guys, you're just amazing! Thank you for all the follow/favourites and reviews :)

Keep being amazing!


	15. Ripping off the bandage

**Chapter 15 – Ripping off the bandage**

"I had a really good time today," I said while leaning in the frame of the doorway. Anna smiled. She was standing outside, her hands buried in her pockets. We had grabbed dinner after the aquarium, and had taken a stroll through the park while watching the sunset. The sun was now gone, and the apartment was dark and empty.

"Me too."

We stood for a while. Anna had taken a step towards me, one hand stroking my cheek. I could have stood like that forever. The way she looked at me, the way she made me feel, it was so refreshing. It was against everything I had ever thought, and made me reconsider so many things. Things such as love.

"Do you want to come in?" I asked, biting my lip.

"Are you sure?" She asked pulling me close. Our noses touched. I felt a jab in my core. An uncontrollable lust. I swallowed hard.

"Positive."

The redhead smiled, and stepped inside. She slid off her jacket and hung it on the rack. The living room was so dark, and the space was huge, so we decided to go to my room.

Anna was standing next to me on my bed to reach the shelf containing the few DVDs that we owned. As I stood trying to convince Anna to watch Rain Man (come on, it's a classic), she complained it did not have enough action. Anna was determined that the movie at least had to contain a good car-chasing scene, or she would fall asleep.

As I tried reaching for another movie, which I thought the redhead would appreciate, I almost slipped off the bed. If it hadn't been for Anna's strong arms, I would have gone tumbling to the floor. To my luck, she caught me. Her face was so close to mine, it lighted something inside of me. As I thought she was going to let go, the girl tightened her grip around me.

Anna leaned in towards me and grazed her lips upon mine. I felt like I had turned to solid ice for a moment. But another of Anna's kisses hit me, and I was thawing. Soon our bodies were intermingled. My hands held tightly around Anna's neck as she kissed me harder. Anna's hands crept onto my back, feeling the bare skin that became exposed as my sweater curled up by Anna's touch. Our breaths became heavy and we snuck in quick gasps of air between the kisses. My mind quickly wandered back in time, back to the time where I had completely stopped believing in love.

My first time was awful. It was clumsy, painful and awkward. He was sweet and all, very gentle. It was pretty much everything I had expected. Now I wasn't sure if I regretted it. Is wishing to able to have a second try at one's first time the same as regretting it? As for my partner in crime, he graduated last year. I wasn't in love with him, and vice versa. The ideal concept of a perfect first time was completely erased from my mind at that point. I was tired of feeling so controlless. Considering this, I concluded that one's own body is the only thing here in this world that we can have at least partly take control over. So before my limbs were getting tired and old, or some horrible disease struck me, I decided now was the time. No more waiting. There is never a right time for anything, and if you keep waiting for it, it is just going to pass you anyway. Time waits for no one, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't seem to shake the feeling of not having enough of it.

Now I had my second chance. It had to be perfect. It had to be smooth, and amazing, and wonderful.

I knew Anna hadn't been with anyone other than Hans, and we were both inexperienced in the girl's department. Anna's body was suddenly so warm. We laid down on the bed, without breaking the kiss. I felt the weight of Anna on top of me, pushing myself against her strong body. My body was trembling. Our hands were all over each other, exploring the curves and smoothness.

I felt a sudden craving. I wanted Anna so badly. Gravity changed, and Anna was now on her back, panting heavily. I managed to unbutton a few of the buttons of Anna's shirt.

The image was astonishing, as she laid beneath me. Freckles covered parts of her chest, and her shoulders. I wanted to explore every part of her body, kiss every inch of her skin.

She smiled at me as I was looking at her. She was so confident as she laid nearly half-naked on the bed. Her lips were slightly swollen from the intense kissing. My sweater was slowly coming off. I was wearing a white tank underneath my sweater. The redhead's hands were everywhere, feeling their way up under my shirt, tracing my bare skin. Her hand reached the opening of my bra. She was fiddling with the hooks, and it wouldn't bulge.

"Ouch!" I said as the material cut into my skin.

"Sorry, it's much easier doing it on yourself," she stated.

I tried unhooking it, but my trembling fingers couldn't do it. I let it be for now, figuring I would just pull it over my head later.

Anna reached up to kiss me again, her hands steadily exploring my forms. She caught my gaze, and we looked at each other hungrily, both yearning for each other's touch. The velvety touch of her hands had me burning with desire. She seemed so effortless in her doing.

The burning between my legs was becoming too intense to ignore. The intensity only grew, and it was nearly sickening. The fire was actually starting to grow painful. For the first time that day, I felt discomfort in my lower abdomen.

_Oh no, _I thought. _This can't be happening!_ I started counting in my head.

Apparently, it could.

I felt warm tickling liquid between my legs. I knew something like this was _supposed_ to happen in situations like these, but this didn't feel right. Anna's hand was working its way up under my skirt. Quickly, I stopped her before it reached its destination. A wave of emotions crossed her face. She looked scared for a second, the fear surfacing as she thought she might have hurt me, or overstepped.

"Sorry," I said. "Just…give me a second."

I jumped off of her, and headed to the bathroom. Sure enough, a red spot had soaked into my underwear. _You have got to be kidding me_. The anger started to fuel up inside of me. _This can't be happening,_ my mind repeated.

My hands started working automatically, grabbing my girl supplies from the cabinet. After I'd cleaned myself up, finding my secret underwear stock behind the sink, I stood taking a long hard look in the mirror. Then, I sat down on the cold tiles, finding myself completely lost. The tears trundled down my cheeks, meeting under my chin, and splashed onto the cold bathroom floor. I wasn't sure how long I was sitting there, until I heard a knock on the door.

"Elsa, are you alright?"

I sniffled, too embarrassed to answer the girl. A few more knocks sounded. Anna wasn't the type who gave up. I loved that about her.

"Elsa, you're scaring me. If you won't answer, I'm coming in."

Anna gave me a few seconds to reply to her statement. A few more seconds passed before I heard the click of the door handled. Anna peaked her head in, and found me sitting on the floor, tears still filling my eyes. Her eyes went wide, and quickly entered the restroom, sitting down next to me.

"Elsa, what's wrong? Did I hurt you?" I could hear the concern in her voice.

I shook my head. With that, Anna placed herself next to me, and wrapped an arm around me. I leaned my head onto her shoulder.

"I got my period…" I said discomfited.

"Oh…" Anna said, leaning her head onto mine. She took one of my hands from my lap, and brought it to her chest. I could feel her heart beating. It was so strong, so forceful.

"I wanted it to be perfect," I mumbled.

"That's some pretty high expectations, don't you think?" She kissed my palm and started playing with my fingers. I shrugged.

"Its fine, it doesn't have to be perfect," Anna said as she gave me a peck on the cheek. "Perfect is boring anyways," she stated and stood. Pulling me up, she wrapped her arms around my waist.

"I know perfect isn't everything, and is unachievable…but to me you're perfect," Anna confessed.

The words filled me with warmth. A different type of warmth than I had felt only minutes ago. The pressure was gone. Anna had made it disappear just like that. It was amazing how she did it.

"Come on, let's get some sleep." She pulled me towards the bed. Anna laid down first, and towed me down with her. Burying her face in my hair, she kissed the back of my head, before wrapping her arms around me. I was lying in a protective cocoon of Anna. I fell asleep in her arms.

* * *

><p>I woke up curled up on my side. The slight inhale and exhale beside me assured me Anna was still right next to me. I missed her embrace. Our date started to play inside of my head again, replaying the best parts. I laid restless, thinking for a long while.<p>

Finally, I popped myself up on one elbow, and looked at the sleeping girl next to me. I stroked her hair. The locks were so smooth and soft. Anna smacked her lips before exhaling softly once again.

We weren't perfect. Far from. But to me, Anna was the closest thing to perfect I had ever felt. She acknowledged my flaws – embraced them even. Made me feel better about them, accepting the rough parts of me, and did not try to change me. She made me feel loved. Secure. Safe. Self-confident. Alive. Before I met Anna, I was certain that love didn't exist. I still wasn't confident whether this was love according to the book, or what love felt like exactly. However, in my mind this was it. Anna was it.

"Anna?" I kissed her lips. Nothing.

"Psst, Anna," I whispered under my breath.

The girl stirred, making cute noises as she did. I kissed her lips again, which slowly came to life under mine. Sleepily she was kissing me back.

"What?" She whispered under my lips.

I pulled away, and carefully stroked my hand across her cheek, gently brushing a wayward strand of hair behind her ear.

"I love you," I whispered back.

The words felt foreign on my tongue. It was quiet for a while, and I was scared. I was scared that she might actually have heard me. At the same time I was scared that she might hadn't, and had drifted back to sleep. For a moment, I wanted to curl up into a ball and crawl deep under the covers, until Anna said, "Elsa you are such a dork."

I could hear the smile on her lips.

"Such a hopeless romantic, waking me up in the middle of the night with such momentous confessions," she added with a yawn. I was impressed by her vocabulary, imagining her mind must have been rather foggy from waking up so abruptly. It was quiet for little for while again.

"Good thing I love you too," and with that she turned her back to me and pressed it to my front. I snaked my hands around her waist, wearing a goofy smile. Luckily, it was too dark to see. That night I fell asleep happier than I'd ever been.

* * *

><p>After dishing up some meatballs and potatoes, Gerda and I sat down for an early dinner. From the moment she walked in, she was able to sense my anxious state of being. That woman would notice everything, even an eyelash astray. She'd even noticed the cut above my eyebrow, Nala's work and pride, even though I had tried to cover it up with a thousand layers of foundation – however, she was wise enough not to question it, though she shot me a stiff look.<p>

It was no surprise she had already detected my unease. I knew I wasn't a master in hiding it, with my hand fiddling and eye-avoidance, but even though I practically sat on my hands and forced myself to stare her in the eye, she could still see right through me. As we sat around the dinner table – much closer to each other than when I had dinner with my dad, by Gerda's suggestion – she tried to spike up a conversation to brighten my mood.

"So, do you have any plans this weekend?" Gerda asked excited, pouring us some water.

"Not particularly. I have this mythology project I need to work on, but other than that…" I took a sip of water.

"That sounds insanely boring," she announced. "Why don't you go to a concert? Or shopping maybe?" She knew how much I hated shopping; being the whole reason my father had requested her to decorate the place.

"Maybe you, Kristoff and that handsome Sven fella' could go watch a movie? _Or_ even better have a movie-night here! You could throw a whole party! Invite the whole school, don't worry I'll take care of the booze," she gave me a goofy wink, while she took a nip of her water.

We both knew how unlikely this was. She knew I wasn't the most popular kid at school. I strongly doubted Gerda would object to me throwing a party however. I was even sure she _would_ supply the booze. The room fell quiet for a bit. _Oh, screw it._ I inhaled deeply.

"Gerda," I said.

The urgency in my intonation made her smile fade. I sat there for a while, inadvertently dragging it out the tension, wondering if it was too late to abort mission. I could still chicken out and say I got a bad grade or something. _No,_ it was time. _Do it now! Do it quick,_ _like ripping off a bandage!_ I could tell my silence was killing her, so I just sighed, and spat it out.

"Gerda, I'm gay." The blood rushed from my face, and my stomach dropped. I gave her a while, but she stared straight ahead for a couple of seconds… and then kept eating. Had she heard me?

"Gerda?" I tried. "Say something, please," I begged. She just shrugged, and smiled.

"Good luck telling your father," she responded, smiling mischievously. I laughed. Then she took my hand, gave it a tiny squeeze, and stuffed her mouth with a potato.

"Elsa, you're an amazing person. This doesn't change anything," she chewed, "and I must say this is delicious," she added. And from that moment, I knew for sure that I was never going to be alone in this crazy world. She took a sip of her drink, eyeing me over the glass.

"So, any cute girls at school?"

* * *

><p>As the night captured the city in darkness, I found myself sitting alone in my room, on my laptop. I had been sitting, staring, at the green icon at the bottom of my screen, next to the name 'Anna,' for way too long. My math homework was spread across my desk, unfinished, and unsolvable. It was so tempting to click on Anna's name, to open up a chatroom, perhaps even call her.<p>

The curser circled around Anna's name, before coming to rest on it. _No! Bad hand! Don't you dare-_

'_Click!'_

And I had lost the battle.

Skype was currently dialling up Anna, and before it got a chance to ring for the second time, she picked up.

"You sure are up late," I heard Anna say. The sound of her voice made me discard the worries of my homework entirely. Suddenly they were non-existing, even as they laid displayed mockingly right in front of me.

"And hello to you," I giggled. Anna huffed, I could hear her smiling.

"Hi," she then said, and it was just completely ridiculous how adorable a person could sound over the phone. By now, I was definitely not regretting the decision of neglecting my homework, though I probably wouldn't be too happy with myself tomorrow.

There was a bit of noise on the line, but nothing too distracting.

"What are you up to?" I asked the girl, imagining her as was sitting behind her computer, wearing a headset, resulting in her having to tug her hair behind her ears.

"Watching _Divergent_," she replied. I heard gunshots in the background, assuming she was well into the movie.

"Am I interrupting?" I asked, concerned I might have interrupted an important plot twist or one of Anna's beloved action scenes.

"No! No, not at all, I love talking to you," Anna said quickly. "Honestly, this movie is more brutal than _The Hunger Games_… I don't mind you being here with me."

She said the last part with such a small voice. Just as I thought she couldn't be more adorable.

"I wouldn't know, I haven't watched either," I said. It was quiet on the line for a few seconds.

"I really need to educate you on dystopian sci-fi…" Anna sighed. I imagined her pinching the bridge of her nose. The thought made me smile.

"You're so cute when you talk dork," I teased. Anna snorted, and I could hear her readjusting on her bed.

"So, watcha doing?" Anna then asked, seeming to disregard the movie a bit.

"Math," I could nearly sense the redhead flinch as the word left my mouth.

"Do you need any help?"

"No, it's fine…"

"But I'm your tutor!" Anna pointed out.

"Yes, but you're first and foremost my girlfriend," I responded. It was silent now. Anna fell awfully quiet at once. For a moment I thought the connection was lost, and I was about to redial.

"Anna?"

But when I saw the minutes passing on the screen, I was very aware that Anna was still with me. What had the girl go mute so suddenly was still a mystery.

"You…called me your girlfriend…" Anna stated after a while.

Her words caught me by surprise. My mind had slowly settled upon the status of Anna being my girlfriend. Of course, we both knew how we felt about it each, and we had even said 'I love you', but this was the first time one of us had referred to the other as 'girlfriend.'

"Sorry, shouldn't I have said that…?" I asked, suddenly doubting myself.

"No, no…it's just… I like the sound of it. Especially when you say it."

And once again Anna Anderson had not failed to put a smile on my face.

"I guess this means we're exclusive, huh?" Anna said jokingly. Modern technology could not evolve fast enough, so that one day, I could punch Anna on the shoulder for such remark over Skype.

We talked for a while longer, until Anna ended the call with a "'night beautiful."

I went to bed that night, for once, almost excited to go to school the next day. Partly for the academics, but mostly because of a certain redhead.


	16. The people-pleaser

**Chapter 16 – The people-pleaser**

"Say it in Norwegian," Anna whispered, releasing her lips from my neck, only to kiss me on the cheek. I sucked in a quick breath.

"Jeg elsker deg."

The girl made some pleased noises and her lips traced down my jawline.

"Say it in Chinese," she mumbled.

We were sitting on the couch. Actually, _I_ was sitting on the couch, and Anna was straddling me. It was Thursday afternoon. We had the whole apartment to ourselves, and taking advantage of every minute of it.

"Wo ai ni," I breathed out, hardly able to focus.

Her mouth worked its way to my collarbone. Anna's jeans felt soft under my fingertips. I had one hand on Anna's thigh, and the other holding a firm grip on the couch, as if I was to fall off any second – but with Anna, who knew? The girl could be so unpredictable; I didn't doubt that Anna was fully capable of sending of tumbling to the floor, for a spur-of-the-moment rush. She might even find it hilarious, and could easily convince me it was a good idea. I leaned my head back, enjoying the gentle touch.

"French," she said, grabbing each of my hands and intertwining our fingers.

Closing my eyes, my breath hitched as the girl suckled on the sensitive skin on my neck, probably leaving a mark.

"J-Je t'aime."

"Gosh, that sounds sexy," Anna giggled, while biting my earlobe. I couldn't help but chuckle along. Anna pulled back, looking at me with those piercing teal eyes of hers. Her freckles dotted her face in beautiful patterns, and I almost felt the urge to trace them. Tracing them like a star chart, mapping every formation.

"What can I say, those French people know what they're about," I smirked.

Before climbing off, Anna gave me a quick kiss on the mouth. She placed herself next to me, sluggishly putting her feet on the sofa table. I nuzzled into the crook of her neck, and Anna wrapped an arm around me.

We sat for a few minutes, not speaking, but enjoying the moment. Anna's other hand was in my lap, and I sat and played with her beautiful tanned fingers. She was wearing dark purple nail polish – the kind of dark that looked almost black unless you shredded light on it. It suited her perfectly, matching the dark sweater the redhead was wearing. Her hair was pulled up into a high ponytail, while amiss strands of hair framed her face.

_Elsa, just tell her. You know it's been nagging you._

I took a deep breath. Anna's hands were my distraction, giving me an excuse not to look at the girl.

"I told Gerda about us."

The room fell quiet again; even more quiet than before if that was even possible. Anna knew about Gerda, and how she had looked out for me since my arrival. I had even told Anna about the pillow incident.

The silence grew uncomfortable. I tore my gaze from her wonderful fingers, and looked at Anna's face. It was difficult to read her expression.

"I'm sorry, I should've talked to you about it. She's happy for us – I promise she won't tell-"

"No Elsa," Anna interrupted. "I think it's wonderful."

I leaned my forehead on Anna's shoulder in relief. She kissed the top of my head.

"How do you feel about it?" Anna asked.

And before I knew it, the apprehension inside of me was back. How _did_ I feel about it? How did I feel about the world slowly settled upon the factum that I was gay, or at least gay-ish? The only thing I knew was how I felt about Anna. Everything else seemed like a blur.

"Good." My voice was firm. _I'm fucking terrified_, my mind stated.

"And us?" Anna continued. I froze again, not completely sure where this conversation was going.

"What about us?"

"How do you feel about us?" she pushed. Anna's hand had become rigid in my lap.

I looked up to meet her eyes. They were a mixture of every emotion I could think of. Even though Anna was as easy to read as a book at times, she had her moments where she was completely impossible to retain any information from. And as of now, I couldn't even read her front cover. Something laid beneath her expressionless gaze. It was hiding under the surface, but it was there. Something she was good at hiding. It was then I realized Anna was an expert at hiding – she did it every day. She lived a double life.

"You know how I feel about us. If you don't recall, I just described how I felt in multiple languages," I tried, but her face was still only a mask. _What is she getting at?_

"That's not what I meant Elsa. I know you love me. I'm asking how you are feeling about us. About everything."

"I'm fine," I assured her. "Everything is fine Anna."

My voice didn't miss a beat. I didn't want her to worry, or drive her away with my insecurities. _I'm scare you'll leave me, like everyone else. I'm scared people won't approve. What if my father finds out? _

She looked me deep in the eye, and for the first time she let an emotion shine through. Her mask faltered, and revealed anger. Hurt. She took one long glance at my fiddling fingers in my lap, and stood up.

"You're doing it again…" Anna mumbled upset.

"Doing what?"

"You know what I am talking about. Elsa, you're such a people-pleaser."

The words stung as they left the redhead's mouth. I clenched my jaw. Anna walked around collecting her things. Her knuckles had turned white from the enormous amount of force she used to clench her hands into fists.

"What makes you say that?"

"You just tell people what they want to hear. Like when I asked about how you were feeling, you just lied me right in the face. Please just tell me what you're fucking feeling."

Anna's anger took over; she was clenching her jaw tightly.

Defensively I stood, my arm crossed over my chest. Anger swelled up inside of me too. I couldn't help it. These accusations were too much. Partly because they were true… _mostly_ because they were true actually. I hated how the girl could read me so easily. I hated the way she made me feel. That wasn't true, and I knew it, but at that very moment I truly did hate it. Being so controlless. So powerless. Completely dependent on another person. Anna had haunted my mind since day one. She had simply put up camp inside of my head, dominating almost every thought. I wanted her out of there. I wanted her out of my head.

"You want to know how I'm fucking feeling? I hate that you're friends with them! I hate that you and Nala are best buds, and you let her treat me like shit!"

"Suddenly this is about my friends?!" Anna yelled.

_Yeah Elsa, where the hell did that come from?_

It wasn't much of a question where it came from though. It bothered me, yes, but this was only an attempt to project the conversation over on Anna.

"What '_friends'_?! You really consider those people your friends? I thought you had better judgement than that Anna," I snarled, finally losing my temper entirely.

I couldn't get myself to regret the words that had just left my mouth. They were true, but hurtful and cruel. Anna didn't deserve them, but it was too late to take them back.

She was putting on her shoes now, violently tying the laces on her boots.

"What do you know about friends Elsa? It's not like you have a bunch," she growled.

That comment hit right in the chest. The tears were threatening to spill. My eyes stung from holding back the tears. Anna saw how her words had hit spot-on. Her eyebrows knitted together in a shameful expression. I couldn't say anything, my voice had tied a knot on itself. My lips was pressed into a thin line.

"Those people are my friends. I don't expect you to understand," Anna stated firmly.

She finally grabbed her jacket, and swung it over her shoulders. Anna headed for the door, taking the handle. Before she exited, she looked her over shoulder, seeing the tears that I had fought so hard to hold back had escaped and were trailing down my cheeks.

"Everything can't go according to your perfect little world, Elsa. Life doesn't work like that."

With that, she left, leaving me more alone in the huge apartment than I'd ever felt. My emotions were scattered all over the place. I was furious over her ignorance, but at the same time, I knew I had brought this on myself. I walked to the window to see Anna walk out on the street. She was rubbing her hands together, and brushed something away from her cheek. Was she crying? I saw her leaning up against her car, lighting a cigarette. She huffed a couple of angry breaths of smoke before throwing it on the street, and drove off.

* * *

><p>Friday was a very long day. Anna and I hadn't spoken since our fight. She didn't initiate contact at all during the whole day. Sitting at the lunch table with Kristoff and Sven, looking over at the Royal's, made the blood sizzle in my veins. Anna was sitting next to Hans, they were talking. <em>Look at that smug face. Disgusting!<em>

"Whoa, easy on that piece of chicken," Kristoff laughed.

I noticed I'd cut it into complete shredded pieces, and it now nearly looked like mashed potatoes. The knife in my hand had almost cut through the plastic tray. I dropped the cutlery, and picked up my juice box instead, taking small sips in hope that it would ease the fury that was building up inside of me.

"Or… at least I think that's chicken. Sven, judgement call," he said.

The remainder of lunch went by with Sven and Kristoff discussing the textural properties a piece of meat should withhold to actually be considered meat. At least I didn't have to join the conversation, which gave me time to mull things over, while I at the same time tried to contain myself enough to not launch my fork at Hans.

As the day finally approached to an end, and Anna still hadn't even glanced at me, I decided to bail from basketball practice and just head home. I refused to be the one to initiate contact, thinking it might just upset the girl even more. Truth was, I didn't know what to say, and I was simply afraid to make matters worse. Perhaps the redhead just needed a chance to cool down.

Loneliness filled me as I was driving, and I dearly wished for someone to talk to. However, the only person who could remotely understand my situation I had currently managed to piss off beyond limits.

I crashed on the couch before I even got my shoes off. Flicking through the channels, I found a cooking show.

Only a few minutes passed from entering the door, to the couch-crashing, until my phone vibrated in my pocket. Hoping it was Anna, I pulled out my mobile, and opened the text. It would be an understatement to say I was disappointed when I saw it wasn't from Anna, however, a smile still came across my face when Sven's name popped up on the screen.

**Sven** (17:50): _Hey Elsa, meet us downstairs in ten. Bring Oreos._

I had learned not to question Kristoff's and Sven's untimely messaging, and beginning to just roll with it. Knowing if I wasn't standing outside in exactly 10 minutes, Oreos in hand, they would surely come knocking on my door, and drag me out of the apartment feet first.

As I was reaching for the pack of Oreos in the cabinet, my phone buzzed again.

**Sven** (17:54): _And onions._

I rolled my eyes. _What the hell?_

With a surrendering sigh, I grabbed some onions from a bowl on the counter, and walked towards the elevator. At six o'clock on the dot, Sven and Kristoff pulled in towards my apartment building. They were driving in Kristoff's old pick-up truck. It was a rusty red, the paint slowly starting to peel off. Sven stepped out of the car and grabbed the supplies I had brought. He went to put the things in the back, while I climbed into the car, followed swiftly by Sven. I loved sitting in the middle, even though Sven and Kristoff had a tendency to make a sandwich out of me, as their shoulders were so brought they were almost crushing me.

"We're all set, you can drive my good sir," Sven ordered to Kristoff, who didn't hesitate in stepping on the gas.

I glanced over my shoulder and noticed the massive box of vegetables in the trunk. There were tomatoes, cabbage, apples and even a small watermelon stacked in the box. I noticed a few eggs carefully placed on top of the collection of food. The Oreos seemed out of place as they were placed on the very top.

"What's up with all the food?"

"You'll see. Patience young one," Kristoff said.

_Jeez, if they're going to talk like that the whole time, I might strangle one of them. _

"I'm older than you," I growled.

Kristoff snorted, and Sven joined. Sven reached over and turned on the radio. Soon, rock tunes filled the car, and Sven started bopping his knee to the beat of the music.

"Tell her what happened," Sven ordered with a proud smile. I looked to Kristoff, who was wearing a pleased grin on his lips.

"I mean, I don't like to brag or anything," he huffed, puffing up his chest. "But I held a real-life conversation with Anna Anderson yesterday."

My mouth dropped open. Kristoff laughed when he saw my eyes went wide, luckily, he didn't know the whole truth.

"R-really? What happened?" I asked, clearing my throat, trying not to sound so nervous.

"He swept her off her feet, and they rode into the sunset," Sven supplied, laughing loudly.

"Punch him for me, will ya'?" Kristoff asked.

And I did. We laughed as Sven rubbed his shoulder. I knew my laughter was stiff, and forced, but it was the best I could come up with at this very moment.

"Nothing happened," Kristoff continued. "I just saw her across the street, getting out of her car, she looked upset. I walked to her, and I comforted her with my smooth and soothing words," Kristoff announced happily. "And then we hugged."

At this point, my stomach was a pit of guilt and lies. For a moment, I felt like was going to get car-sick. The space felt crammed so suddenly.

"So when is the wedding?" Sven asked, as serious as his voice would let him. This time Kristoff leaned over me to swat Sven in the back of the head with his palm. There was silence for a little while. Kristoff cleared his throat, and suddenly, it was he who sounded nervous.

"Y-you talk to Anna, right? I mean, she's your tutor, you have to talk… right?" He asked. I knew where he was going, and I didn't like it.

"Right," I agreed.

"So, do you think you could put in a good word for me? Talk me up a bit?" He asked hopefully.

Thank God his eyes were on the road, because if he would be able to give me those puppy-dog eyes he usually did when he asked me to watch the latest football game with him, I wouldn't have been able to say no.

"I don't know Kristoff, we don't know each other all that well… maybe it would be weird," I tried.

"Oh come on!" He exclaimed, nearly letting go of the wheel. "It wouldn't hurt, besides, she broke up with Hans – it won't be long until some other dude swoops in!"

_Or before some other girl swoops in, _my mind corrected. His pleading tore me apart, and I couldn't deny his request.

"Fine, I'll see what I can do," I lied. "But I can't promise anything."

It felt horrible lying to him like that, but I couldn't see an alternative. It wouldn't be fair for me to risk Anna's status by telling them.

We drove for a good twenty minutes before the city started to die out. Kristoff listed all kinds of things he would do to show his gratitude, the whole way. I couldn't wait until we arrived at the still-unknown destination. Soon there were open plains, and massive grassland ahead of us. Kristoff pulled in when we reached…nothing. There was nothing here; we were literally in the middle of nowhere. The boys seemed determined as they stepped out of the car. Kristoff lifted the heavy box of food supplies, while Sven jumped up into the trunk to uncover something.

"Elsa my dear, my sunshine, could you fetch the safety glasses in the glove department," Sven said dramatically. I nodded, choosing to ignore the 'my sunshine' part, and let it slide. _These guys are complete lunatics._

"Kristoff, your assistance is required," Sven called. Kristoff put the box down not far from the car. Then he rushed to Sven, and helped him carry some things out of the trunk. First, they pulled out a pair of golf clubs, followed by a metal baseball bat, and finally a crowbar.

_My goodness, they have lost it._

Sven jumped down from the car, approaching me. Kristoff had snatched a pair of safety goggles from my grip, and went to stand by the box of food.

"Choose your weapon," Sven grinned. With wild arm gestures, he presented the choices of murderous weapons. For a moment, I stood in disbelief. Then I looked over at Kristoff, then back at Sven, slowly putting two and two together.

"You can't be serious."

"Oh, we don't joke about this kinda stuff," Sven said in utter seriousness.

"But… wait, for real?"

"Yes for real."

"But…"

"No more buts, let's go."

I huffed once, nearly laughing at their childish endeavour to convince me that this wasn't the craziest thing I'd ever encountered. I decided to play along with their game.

Sven gave me an approving look as he saw I went for the baseball bat. I was about to walk to the other end of the field, but Sven stopped me.

"Safety first," he said placing a pair of goggles on me.

I smiled at him, and couldn't help but giggle at this ridiculous idea. I now stood about ten metres from Kristoff who was patiently waiting for me to get into position. I pulled the club back, preparing to swing at full force.

"Just imagine someone you hate!" Kristoff called, as he picked up an onion.

He tossed it a few times in the air, weighing it in his hand. He prepared to throw, and I nodded to Kristoff that I was ready. He threw the onion with mild force, giving me time to calculate its position. I swung the bat with such force it nearly send me stumbling. There was no sound of contact between the onion and the bat, and I was disappointed to find I hadn't hit it.

"You're thinking way too much!" Kristoff called. "Just stop thinking, and swing the damn thing!" He laughed.

I nodded, preparing myself once again. I decided to follow Kristoff's advice and imagined someone I hated. Hans popped up as number one for some reason. My grip around the club tightened when Nala entered my thoughts. Their faces fuelled me with newfound willpower to hit the damn apple – as Kristoff was now tossing up and down in the air – and I found myself pumped, excited even.

I nodded to Kristoff, who gently tossed the apple towards me. I saw Hans' auburn hair in the red peel of the apple as it hung in mid-air. It spiked something in me. This time I didn't think, or try calculating the distance or position of the fruit, but simply let the club swing at full force. The satisfying sound of the fruit colliding with the bat sounded, and the apple was torn to pieces. Kristoff and Sven were cheering at the top of their lungs.

However, I wasn't done.

I held a firm grip around the club and smashed the remainder of the apple – now on the ground – into even smaller pieces. When all that was left was apple puree, I started beating at the onion on the ground not far from where the apple had landed.

"You," the club collided with the onion, "stupid," again "bastards!" and again.

My arms were getting tired, but the feeling was so satisfying every time the club struck the vegetable.

"I think she's enjoying herself," I heard Sven say with a smirk.

"Definitely," Kristoff agreed.

I was panting hard when the onion was finally beaten flat. Chest heaving I walked over to Kristoff and Sven, both wearing goofy grins. Sven was standing with the pack of Oreos. I handed Kristoff the bat.

"I feel better," I breathed.

And I did, I felt terrific in fact. Kristoff leaned the bat against the car.

"What were the Oreos for?" I asked, still trying to catch my breath.

"Eating of course…" Sven stated matter-of-factly. I rolled my eyes at him.

"My turn," Kristoff announced reaching for the crowbar. Sven stuffed his mouth with another Oreo, and headed for the food-box. Kristoff hit the tomato in first try.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Next chapter is a big one, be prepared! :D


	17. Heroes

**Chapter 17 – Heroes**

Kristoff was sitting on the floor in front the TV in my apartment. It was Monday night, and he had convinced me to watch Spiderman with him. Sven wasn't present, he said he had better things to do. He had an unspoken rule about superheroes. Sven insisted that superheroes were a complete made-up concept of bravery and selflessness. Heroes didn't exist in the real world, and it was just a platonic kid's concept, like Santa Claus.

However, I knew for a fact Sven believed in some real-life people as heroes, but perhaps in a more pragmatic sense. Sven had told me Kristoff was his hero when he was younger. He even insisted on calling his adoptive parents heroes once in a blue moon. Sven saw the every-day hero. The hero without supernatural powers and spandex. True heroes who had in fact worked and earned their skills, instead of receiving them.

Anna and I hadn't spoken all weekend. Not a single text or call. I missed her so much it hurt, but the redhead clearly needed some space. I knew she attended Simon's party this weekend; it was all the whole school was talking about. I missed her so dearly that I wouldn't even have minded a drunk text. A simple indication assuring that we were okay and this was fixable. I was still quite angry with her though. I'd realized that we'd both been out of line. Maybe even Anna more than me. As Anna's girlfriend, didn't I have a potential right to question her about her friends? Especially friends like _Nala_.

The fight was bound to happen though. We'd spend so much together that a fight by now was nearly inevitable. I just never imagined our first fight as a couple would be such a big one…

"Gosh, could Mary-Jane just shut up for a second, I feel like all she does in this movie is scream…" Kristoff complained. I chuckled at the blond sitting on the floor. He was leaning against the couch I was sitting on.

"Jesus Christ, why can't he just tell her he is Spiderman and get it over with?!" Kristoff was using wild hand gestures, while throwing popcorn at the screen.

"It must be difficult living a double life," I mumbled, though loud enough for Kristoff to hear.

"Difficult? He's hiding behind a mask, what's difficult? I mean, imagine if he told people he was Spiderman – probably wouldn't be beaten up at school anymore, just sayin'," Kristoff stated, as if it was that easy.

"Yeah, but then his enemies would know too, and he would be vulnerable…" I trailed off.

I couldn't help but think of Anna, and how she was like Spiderman in a sense.

Or Spiderman in reverse.

She had an image to withhold. She was hiding the dork, the total geek, the part of her that secretly wanted to be a marine biologist, the part of her that listened to classical music, the part of her that not just enjoyed, but _loved _books as if they had feelings.

She _was_ living a double life.

And she didn't want me to be part of the fake one, the one at school. That was all just a façade. She wanted me to know the real her. But revealing her true self…she would be left vulnerable. Now, for the first time in forever, I had friends, and I understood what that meant. Anna would have to turn her back to the place she belonged, where she felt accepted. I knew better than all people what it felt like not having a place to belong. She would have to drop her guards. Sometimes it was just easier pretending to be something you're not... Like I was doing with Sven and Kristoff. Pretending not to be in love with Anna.

I suddenly saw Anna's situation with brand new eyes, and I felt a cringing urge to call her. Call and apologize, and talk things out. We both had things to apologize for. I felt the urge to hold her in my arms, and tell her it was all okay again. That we were okay, and that I would stop pushing until she was ready. As long as I knew who she truly was, nothing else mattered.

I missed my hero.

* * *

><p>Anna wasn't at school the next day. For the first time in almost a week, I tried texting her. When there was no reply, I tried calling, but her phone was switched off. That's when I decided to go to her house. I knew where she lived, obviously, and didn't find it that odd to drop by – it could might as well have been home-tutoring, in case Kristoff asked.<p>

The minute the bell rang, I headed to my car. The traffic was light, and I was standing outside of Anna's house in no time. It looked deserted in a sense, the house.

The window shades were down, and there was no smoke from the chimney like there had been the last time I had visited. The trees were naked, looking so fragile since their leafy crowns had disseminated with help from the wind. Brown leafs were scattered over the hard cement, making the ground look muddled.

With a few uncertain strides, I walked to the front door and knocked twice. I stood there for a good minute and a half before knocking again. When no one answered, I turned around on my heels and walked to my car.

As soon as did, however, the door creaked open. There Anna's mother stood, eyes searching my face.

"Elsa? Sorry, I wasn't sure if someone was knocking," she said. Her mouth wasn't chirped into her cheery smile as the first time I met her. Walking closer, I noticed the small bags under her eyes.

"Hi Mrs. Anderson," I said. Standing with my hands buried in the pockets of my jacket.

"Did you and Anna have a session today? But it's Tuesday…" Mrs. Anderson said gently, but with confusion in her voice.

"No. No we didn't. I just noticed Anna wasn't at school, and I wanted to check up on her." This time a tiny smile escaped from the woman's lips, and it was comforting to see.

"That was sweet of you Elsa," her mother said, and I could hear the kindness in her voice. Mrs. Anderson studied my face, as if she was looking for something. Her eyes were glossy, however, as I was talking to her, she seemed to forget the misery that had displayed in her eyes when she first opened the door.

"Is she home?" I asked, finally getting to the point.

Mrs. Anderson now opened the door completely, and stood leaning in the doorway. She crossed her arms over her chest, and titled her head as she looked at me – just like Anna sometimes did. She shook her head.

"She's still at the cemetery with Olaf. She said she would take him out for ice cream afterwards."

"The… cemetery?" I said, not completely following.

"Yes, she wanted to visit her father's tombstone. Today's the two year anniversary of my husband's death," she said with glistering eyes. "I'm sure she must've told you?"

"No. She didn't." I clenched my jaw.

It was silent for a while. The information hit me like a brick to the face_._

_Anna, for Christ sake, why didn't you tell me?_

My heart went cold with sadness for the redhead. Suddenly my joins felt achy, and I couldn't get the image of a grieving Anna standing by her father's coffin at a funeral out of my head. She always spoke so highly of him, but never slipped between past and present tense as I had done with my mother. I'd never even considered the possibility, and I hated myself for not being there for her.

Gosh, I felt like the most horrible person at that very moment. The worst possible girlfriend. For heaven's sake, the thought hadn't even entered my mind the first time I was invited over for dinner.

How her father hadn't been present, and how Anna had even pulled out an extra chair from her mother's study. There wasn't even four chairs circled around their dinner table. I had just assumed, like my father, Anna's dad had a crazy work schedule.

Perhaps the excessive amount of time spend away from either of my parents, made me not realize that something was even missing. That my family setting was so damaged and imperfect, that my brain wouldn't even recognize a family dysfunction, because it was too blinded by just the fact of having a mother and a little brother. That those two had simply outshined the fact that her father had been missing. But honestly, that was just a lazy excuse. How ignorant and selfish could a person be?

Before I had the chance to say goodbye, and bold, Mrs. Anderson spoke.

"You know, you're the first friend Anna has ever brought over. She must think you're pretty special," she said with a smile. The tiny wrinkles around her eyes were clenched together. I couldn't say anything. The words rested on my tongue, but I couldn't spit them out.

"After my husband's death, Anna have had a hard time. She's not the same… she doesn't open up to me anymore. Then you came along, and it seems, recently you're the only thing she talks about. She speaks highly of you," her smile faltered a bit.

Her words seemed incomprehensible, as if my brain denied to face reality. To realize Anna didn't have the perfect life, the perfect family setting. She too, was lacking a father. Perhaps not in the same way I did, but still similarly to some extent. And she thought_ I_ was special. _Me_. Elsa the introverted, academically challenged, fitness-freak. A person with so many emotionally instabilities, and to some extend anger-issues.

The bundle of shame and anger settled in my stomach, this time, with no indication of untangling. Ever.

Mrs. Anderson almost stopped smiling completely. She looked at me with her pale teal eyes.

"I would hate seeing her getting hurt," she eyed me warily.

_Too late,_ I thought shamefully.

"Anna is good at putting on her game-face, but I know she's struggling. She feels everything so deeply, always has. A person can only pretend for so long until they crash. Nobody is that good, not even Anna, even if she at times seem like she can take on the world. That's my Anna, always full of spirit, even when she's hurting," she huffed with a proud grin.

Then the tears started to spill, I stood hardly able to breathe, and could only watch as the woman sobbed. The image of Anna standing strong next to her father's grave flashed through my mind. Her brave posture, and stern face, as she was comforting her little brother, careful not to let a tear slip. The way she would rest a hand on the younger boy's shoulder, and bow her head in respect, never allowing herself to cry. Never allowing anyone to see the hurt she felt inside, which she was so adept to camouflage.

A car suddenly pulled in by the curb in front of the house. It took me a second to grasp that it was indeed Anna's car.

Mrs. Anderson swiftly wiped away her tears, and waved at the car. Soon enough the redhead stepped out of the vehicle. Olaf jumped out, ice cream in hand, and ran towards his mother.

His face was smeared in chocolate ice cream. The younger boy stood, licking his cone, while hugging his mother's legs. She gently ran a hand through his hair. I knew it was only Anna who would be crazy enough to purchase ice cream in such cold weather. Even with the knot of guilt and anger in the pit of my abdomen, I couldn't help the slight simper that appeared on my lips. I caught Anna's eyes, and immediately received a leer expression – the redhead was definitely not happy to see me.

"Anna dear," her mother greeted her. "Elsa and I were just talking about you," she chippered.

"Lovely," Anna said in a monotone voice, however, with a strident undertone. I could see her discomfort as she locked eyes with me once again. Her gaze nearly send me running with my tail between my legs, but I needed to make this right. We had so much to talk about.

Mrs. Anderson cleared her throat, and suggested that Anna and I could go to her room, while she prepared some tea for us. Anna's harsh look made me feel like I was trespassing. And I was. I knew this properly wasn't the outmost suited opportunity or timing, but I couldn't stand another second of Anna being angry with me.

We walked to Anna's room in silence. The younger girl slumped down on her bed immediately, starting to take off her boots. She was surprisingly calm. I stood in the middle of the room, not feeling it would be appropriate for me to sit down. Looking out the window, I saw raindrops beginning to run down the glass. My head snapped towards the redhead when she finally cut through the silence.

"I'm really not in the mood to fight with you," she said. Her voice was firm, but much softer than it had been merely minutes ago.

We both had stuff we needed to apologize for, so I thought I might as well start. Besides, it was no surprise Anna was in a foul mood, being the anniversary of her father's death after all. Searching for her gaze, which she would not return, I answered with a sense of urgency.

"I didn't come to fight. I came to apologize," the confession seemed to lighten the tension. She finally looked up, and her face expressed sadness. It was heart breaking to look at. Funny how a simple expression could make you feel so much pain, as if the bare hands of your worst enemy were tearing out your heart.

"We both said some things we regret. And I'm sorry about what I said," I muttered. "I didn't mean to accuse you of anything. But I feel like I _had_ to ask. Because I really don't understand…"

Anna stopped mid-motion, her hands now simply resting with the laces between her fingers. Before I knew it, I was sitting next to the girl, carefully placing myself by her side. She looked at my face, but could not look me in the eye. We were sitting close, our shoulders touching. Then she leaned her head on my shoulder.

"I missed you," I whispered.

My thumb was stroking her cheek. She leaned into my touch, and I took it as a good sign. A sign that this was fixable. We sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments. Anna's arms had snaked around my waist, as I kept caressing her face. Her touch felt needy, and longing, as if her arms had been restless without me to hold. Her face was now buried in my shoulder.

"I missed you too," she finally mumbled.

Her voice was muffled against the fabric of my thin jacket. She nuzzled closer to me, resting her head at the crook of my neck. We both knew we were ignoring the elephant in the room. However, I didn't know where, or how, to start. Our fight needed closure, but I couldn't get myself to bring it up while the freckled girl was grieving over her father.

As much as I wanted to avoid conflict – or worse, to upset the girl further – I couldn't ignore it anymore. If there was one thing I had learned over the extent of time I'd spend at this new place, was that problems didn't go away no matter how hard you avoided them. They had to be dealt with. One thing at a time. I knew it wouldn't be easy.

"Your mom told me about your father," I said.

Anna's body stiffened. Her eyes fluttered open; I could feel her eyelashes brush the skin on my neck. I felt her hands clench around the fabric of my clothing she was holding onto.

"Why didn't you tell me Anna…?" I asked carefully, trying to hide the hurt in my voice.

Anna let go of me. I missed her touch already as the girl pulled back to look me in the eye. Her eyes were glistering, the tears sparkling, threatening to spill over. Her expression was incomprehensible.

"I haven't told anybody…," she breathed. I felt my throat tightening. Her complexion was pure hurt and pain now. Anna leaned over, resting her elbows on her knees.

"The only person at school who knows is my cousin…I told her to keep her mouth shut though," she whispered hoarsely. Carefully I placed a gentle hand on the younger girl's back, taking in her reaction, before rubbing it up and down her spine.

"But…why?"

Nothing seemed to make sense. Why would Anna keep such thing hidden? What was with all the secrecy about her family? Why did she try so hard to keep her social life and family life separate? Living two separate lives was no way of living. I could see how torn she was. And it was her own doing. Anna was slowly, but determinedly, tearing herself apart.

"I didn't want people to treat me differently. They would start pitying me. I wouldn't be able to stand all those sickening sympathetic looks – I could barely remain my sanity at the funeral… It didn't exactly fit into the clique criteria either," Anna sniffled once.

The puzzle was slowly coming together, but there were still a few pieces that seemed misplaced. The criterion-part had me thrown off guard.

"What do you mean?"

Anna sighed heavily, slumping her head between her shoulders. She soon looked up again, but stared into the thin air, her hands folded neatly beneath her chin.

"My father died two years ago. He was killed in the war – it was an ambush. He was shot twice in the chest," Anna said, her voice surprisingly firm and brave. Her hand flew to her chest, as if she could feel the bullets.

"Oh, Anna… I'm so sorry," I whispered, trying to overcome the lump that had settled in my throat. Anna simply nodded in acknowledgement. She looked deep in thought, and then resumed.

"I remember hearing about the attack. I saw it on the News, and my heart nearly stopped. I spend every moment of that day wishing it wasn't my father, that he hadn't been near the attack, and that he was safe… but then we got the call," her voice was still firm, but she sounded so distant, as if she was reliving that day. All I could do was sit and listen.

"It was almost unbearable to watch my mother and Olaf grieve. Olaf sometimes talks about him, even though he did not nearly get as much time with him as I did. As for my mother…" Anna almost couldn't finish, her voice was starting to tremble. "… it was almost as she stopped living completely. Stopped breathing as he took his last breath."

The younger girl stopped for a second, but quickly found the courage to continue. "It was the same year I started high school. Nala found me freshman year. It was so…_easy_ with her. It was as if it never happened. Ignoring the hurt like that…," she trailed off, "no one had to know," she whispered.

"If no one knew it felt less real. I felt so alive with her and her friends, always doing stupid stuff – it kept my mind preoccupied." She took one long hard look at me.

Suddenly I understood. It was so much more than just having a place to belong. Anna needed to forget to survive, and that is what Nala and the rest of the Royal table had provided for her. A way to escape reality.

"I started dating Hans, he was sweet, but such an arrogant douchebag at times. But he made me feel alive…at least for a second."

"I see…" I mumbled. I hated Hans had been there for Anna, and made her feel that way.

Jealousy stirred inside of me. It was an ugly feeling, I knew it, but I couldn't help it. Hans just had that effect on me; at times, I would even go as far as saying I resented him more than Nala. Nala was a bitch, for sure, but Hans was devious and vicious in his own way of being. I could still remember the smug smirk he had send me on my first day, while I was looking up at him from the floor.

Anna noticed my slightly tensing body, seeing my expression fading, and turning into anger.

_Great Elsa, way to make it about you._

"But with you," Anna started, now looking me deep in the eye and taking my hands. "With you it's different. This happiness doesn't seem fake. You make me feel alive without me breaking into amusement parks at night, or getting drunk every weekend. _You_ make me happy."

I smiled at the girl, and she looked relieved. She seemed more at ease than I'd ever seen her. However, I was surprised that she had gotten through all of this without shredding a single tear. Perhaps she had just gotten so used to bottling up everything about her father's death.

"That's why I haven't called the last few days. This day is just…," she let out a displeased sound. "This day just kills me. But I bring Olaf with me to his grave, and we just sit and talk to him. My mom lets us have the day off, and I take him for ice cream afterwards…," Anna's eyes were filled with sadness.

"I'm so sorry about the things I said the other day. I'm sorry I didn't tell you – I should have told you, especially after everything you told me about your mom and dad and–" I cut her off with a kiss, knowing the girl would apologize for the next ten minutes if she was given the chance.

Her lips still tasted as sweet. We broke apart slowly, taking the time to look each other in the eye.

"It's okay…but I wish you'd told me…" I whispered and pulled her towards me.

Anna swung her feet up on the bed, and curled up on her side, while resting her head in my lap. "I'm sorry," Anna said again. It still didn't justify everything that had happened, and I would hate to see myself as someone who forgave their significant other just like that, like some complete love-struck fool with no spine who let themselves be pushed around. But I knew Anna was trying to keep it together. There had to be room for failures and mistakes, because God only knows how many _I_ was going to make in the future.

Suddenly she looked me right in the eye, her gaze so intense it was almost frightening.

"I love you Elsa, please know that. I'm so in love with you that it hurts… but I'm still learning," she said. I understood what Anna was trying to say, and my heart fluttered as she did

One of her hands were wrapped around mine, and she pulled it towards her lips and kissed my palm. My other hand was stroking her wonderful red locks, as much as her beanie would allow at least. We sat like that for several minutes. I could tell the girl was relieved, much to my pleasure.

"Wait, you broke into an amusement park?" I asked, slightly teasing. Anna huffed ever so lightly, her voice still a bit hoarse.

"Just _one_ time," she smirked. It was good to see her smile again; the pearly row of white teeth was one of the things I'd missed the most over the past week.

"I've done a lot of stupid things over the years," Anna admitted, not particularly proud. "But nothing bad enough to be a burden to my mother."

By the time she had said it, her mother called from the kitchen, announcing she had made tea, and asking Anna to come and get it. The girl excused herself, and gave me a swift kiss on the mouth, before leaving the room. She left the door slightly ajar. I took a deep breath, releasing all the tension and guilt I had felt – it was still there, but in more manageable proportions.

I looked down at my feet to see I was still wearing my boots. As I was about to take them off, something caught my attention.

The corner of a pamphlet stuck out from under the bed, and I reached to pick it up, curiosity getting the best of me. Soon I realized it was a brochure. Not just any brochure, but a brochure for Harvard University.

Not being able to resist I reached under the bed, only to find several more college leaflets, some being elite universities. Way too soon Anna stood in the doorway, carrying a tray with tea and cookies. Her face was in utter shock as she realized what I was holding. Hastily she placed the tray on her desk, tea spilling. Angrily she snatched the papers from my grasp, curling them all into a ball.

"What the hell Elsa?" She asked hurt.

"I-I'm sorry, they were on the floor, I…" not knowing what to say, I simply stopped talking. The confusion of the situation overwhelming me. Anna hurried over and closed the door firmly.

"I thought you said you were going to community college," I said, remembering the deep and meaningful conversation we had had in the aquarium. How the girl's voice had faded with enthusiasm as she spoke of her designated college.

"I am," she said, clenching her jaw. I was not convinced; Anna was maybe good at hiding stuff, but she was a terrible liar.

"Anna, you're smart enough to get into any school you desire. If only you could see how competent you are. Why settle for less?"

Anna didn't answer. She looked so small as she stood there by the door. Then she bended over, clutching her arms over her stomach. Her knees hit the floor, and I rushed to her aid. Tears were streaming down her face when I reached her. Anna's eyes were filled with such pain; it took all my willpower not to look away. My arms hesitantly wrapped around her. Teal eyes met mine, as she was stammering out the words.

"I-I can't leave them Elsa…I-I c-can't," she was sobbing now.

Finally, she let me in-capsule her in my embrace. I could feel the hard jerks of her shoulders as she wept. Anna had carried the weight of her family for two years. Pulled them through the sorrow and grief her father's untimely death had caused. She refused to show weakness at the expense of being the strong one. The brave one. Protecting her family of all cause. She finally let it out. It was like a surrender. She finally gave in, and her game-face had faltered. If only she knew this would make her so much stronger. Anna was crying in my arms, her sobs tearing at the silence in the room.

I finally broke her shell. And I felt like it was the first step in the right direction.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I hope this shreds some light on Anna's situation as for why she was a little harsh in the last chapter. Keep in mind that Anna is developing as well, not just Elsa :)

Thank you so much for your reviews you guys :) I love reading all of them.

If you're interested, I've posted a new Elsanna fic called "Ice Roses," so feel free to check it out if you want to :)

All the best from your friendly neighbourhood Banana-viking!


	18. Rainbows and Thunder

**Chapter 18 – Rainbows and Thunder**

Anna persuaded me to stay the night. She convinced me her mother didn't have a clue about us, and girls had sleepovers all the time. Not wholeheartedly believing the freckled goddess, I tried making up a number of excuses of how inappropriate it would be.

"She hardly comes into my room, and your bag is here anyway," she'd argued.

Her adorable turquoise eyes were still red and puffy, and it would be impossible to decline the offer, the girl having such brutal grip around my heart. We'd spend the past hour on the floor, me holding onto Anna as my life depended on it. I had tried rocking her back and forth, and it seemed to soothe the younger girl as she was sobbing in my arms. Soon after she had fell quiet, and the old Anna started to resurface.

The tea had gone cold, and Anna refused to drink it. I was confident the girl was dehydrated after the, what seemed like a billion, tears she had shred. Instead, I force-fed her a cookie, assuring her it would make her feel better.

Now we were curled up on her bed. I insisted on sleeping in my t-shirt, feeling it wouldn't be fitting any other way. Essentially, I had gone to bed still wearing pants, but Anna ripped them off of me, saying that it was, and I quote, 'a disgrace to mankind, and I might as well sleep in a straitjacket on a bed made of hedgehogs.' It amazed me where she came up with such analogies. Her statement had left me speechless, and I lied stiff as she pulled them off.

Anna stripped down to her undergarments, and I couldn't help but let my eyes wander over that amazing body of hers. Her tanned skin looked so deliciously smooth. All I wanted to do was run my hands all over it. Anna snuggled up close to me under the covers, our legs intertwining. Her feet were cold, so I placed them between mine. Our heads were budding together. I placed a feather-like kiss on her lips and nuzzled closer to her.

"No funny-business tonight," she mumbled, "so stop teasing me with your sexiness."

I snorted, kissing her again. She kissed me back. Her hand was on my waist, and mine was on her shoulder. I could feel her bra strap that ran over her collarbone. My eyelids were getting heavy. I listened to Anna's steady breaths, which were becoming slower and heavier by the minute.

"You know," she mumbled hazily, "I wasn't kidding when I said it's different with you." I nuzzled in closer, now almost resting my head on her chest as she spoke. I felt her chest hum under my ear as she spoke.

"It's like…whenever I look at you," she whispered tiredly, "my heart is dancing – no – moonwalking among the stars, with rainbows and puffy clouds…" she trailed off, too tired to continue.

"Wow, you're such a romantic," I mumbled teasingly.

"I try…" Anna breathed before dozing off. I fell asleep to Anna's steady heartbeat – the one currently said to be moonwalking among the stars.

* * *

><p>I woke by the sound of subtle footsteps. The thunder was roaring outside, and the rain was pouring, playing a loud drum solo on the windows. The door creaked open, making that high-pitch squeaky noise they always use in horror movies. Anna and I were laying on each side of the bed, and I was laying with my back to the door. I was laying in fetal position, quickly missing Anna's touch and warmth against me. The footsteps approached slowly, the sound of bare feet carefully crossing the carpeted floor made me want to turn around, but a tiny little voice made me decide not to.<p>

"Anna?" A trembling voice whispered. It was Olaf's tiny voice, and he was crying. I heard his small sniffles.

"Anna?" He whispered again, his voice trying to hide he was on the verge of tears. The figure next to me came to life. Anna sat up abruptly, the cover slid off of her slightly as she did, pulling my part of the comforter with her.

"Olaf? What is it?" Anna asked calmly, as if she was used to this. I heard her rubbing her eyes. Another thunderclap sounded, sounding like it was ripping the nights' sky apart. The sound gave me Goosebumps. Olaf let out a petrified gasp.

"C'mere," Anna said as she pulled her legs off the bed, and placed them on the floor. It was quiet for a while, until another thunderclap sounded.

"It's just a little thunder," she whispered as she pulled him close. His sniffles died out with Anna's comforting words. "See," she continued, "nothing to be scared of."

I popped up on an elbow and turned towards them. I felt as I was intruding, however, nor did it feel candid to eavesdrop. Anna noticed my stirring, and turned around, Olaf still in her arms. She smiled at me, a confident smile – extraordinarily confident for a girl sitting in her underwear. It didn't seem to bother the girl, and I admired how comfortable she was in her skin.

"It's fine Elsa, I'm just gonna put this one to bed," she whispered, smiling at Olaf. The young boy's freckled face lit up. He looked up at her, pure idolization in his eyes. His cute smile was brave; he wanted to be brave for his sister.

"Come on little guy," Anna said with a smile and reached out her hand, which Olaf took. I watched them walk off into the hallway, before laying back down, pulling the covers closer around my body, trying to trap the heat. Anna was back after a couple of minutes. The light from the hallway made her into a silhouette. I watched as her beautiful slender figure closed the door, and killed all light.

I felt the tugging of the cover as Anna slid under it, and placed herself against me. She was leaning over me now; I could sense her face look down upon me, even though it was too dark to make out any facial features. Her hand was resting on my stomach, drawing circles on the fabric of my shirt. She was resting her head in her hand, popped up on one elbow.

Finally, she reached down and grazed her lips upon mine. They felt so full and soft. Anna captured my bottom lip between hers. I snaked a hand around her neck to pull her closer. As I did, she leaned down harder on me, breaking the gentleness of the kiss.

The hand that had rested on my tummy seconds earlier was now trailing down by the hem of my shirt. Anna broke away, trying to catch my eyes, looking for approval, but it was too dark to see. I simply lifted my shirt up, just a tiny bit, and reached up to capture her lips again.

Anna accepted the invitation, and took the liberty to explore my naked skin. Her warm fingers left a tingling trail as they walked over my torso. It made my head spin. Anna's tongue slipped pass my lips, snaking its way gracefully around my mouth, carefully tasting me. My hands crept onto Anna's bare back, and settled at the small of her back. Meantime, Anna's hand daringly approached my chest, currently caressing my ribs. My hands wandered up, trailing the girl's spine, feeling how the muscles under her skin were working to keep herself up.

The kissing became so intense, so wet, Anna had to break free for air. I was left panting as well. As Anna finally gathered courage to run her hand over my breast, she started kissing my neck. Her hand was adventurously exploring my curves, massaging gently. It was amazing how perfect my breast fit into her palm.

My hands stopped working, as did my mind. Closing my eyes, I leaned my head back into the pillow, biting my bottom lip. Speaking of biting, Anna began to nibble gently on my collarbone, suckling and licking my smooth pale skin. The urge to return her touch grew stronger. As the thoughts were exploding in my head, like fireworks on New Year's Eve, Anna bit down just a tad harder. Not being able to hold it back, I let out a pleasurable moan. Anna giggled, not breathing so heavily anymore, and raised her head again.

"Maybe we should stop before we wake up the whole house," she whispered with a laugh. I blushed, not aware that I had been that loud. I nodded in agreement, and Anna removed herself from me, being kind enough to pull down my shirt again as she did. She laid down on her back, and I snuggled up against her. We were quiet for a while, trying to calm down from the intense closeness we had just shared. I broke the silence.

"So… Olaf always comes to you when…?"

"…Yeah. He used to go to my mom, but after my dad died, she started crying herself to sleep every night. I told Olaf not to disturb her…. He shouldn't see her crying, he shouldn't be the one comforting her, that's not fair…" Anna whispered.

"You know, its okay for kids to know their parents are human too, right?" I asked carefully. Anna laid still for a moment, looking at the ceiling.

"I know," she said. "But he's still the child, and she's the parent. He shouldn't take care of her, it's hard enough just to listen to it…" Anna whispered. I leaned closer to her, hugging her body tightly against mine. The rain was coming down hard outside.

"It's okay," I said, feeling Anna's body tense. "I think what you're doing is great… Olaf really loves you, you can tell." Anna laid flat on her back, one hand playing with the edge of the comforter. I took her hand, and brought it to my lips. For once, her hand was a little cold, so I pulled the comforter closer to us both.

I kissed her fingertip.

"You're so good at taking care of people… I just wish you would take a little more care of yourself." Then I kissed another of her fingertips, and pulled her hand under my chin.

"Just…" I started, unsure whether Anna would take this the wrong way, "just, don't forget, you're the kid too…" It was quiet for a little bit. Anna's hand was now playing with my fingers instead of the blanket.

"I know," she said with a sigh. It wasn't an angry sigh, or a sigh of surrender. It was a sigh that told me Anna knew. She knew what I meant, and she agreed – to some extent.

"I love you," I mumbled. I waited in anticipation for her reply – if she was going to give me one, that is. Anna turned her head, and put her chin on the top of my head. My nose was touching her neck now, deeply buried in her scent. Her scent was captivating. She smelled like home. Like everything I was longing for, and more. I wish I could bottle up her aroma, and spray it all over my room.

"I love you too," she whispered and kissed the top of my head. My lips quivered up into a discreet smile. With that, we both let sleep take us into the unconsciousness with its gentle hands.

* * *

><p>It was morning. I knew Anna had a habit of being late, though she claimed she was being "punctual." Punctual in the sense that giving or taking ten minutes wouldn't kill anybody. The fact was just that I was usually never late, at least not for my first period – not since my second day of school. It might evoke suspicion if Anna and I showed up at school at the same time. It would be Twilight all over again. And probably worse.<p>

I couldn't borrow any of Anna clothes, it would be too risky having anyone recognize it. However, I did borrow some clean underwear (presumably no one would have to see those – luckily, we didn't have P.E. today). I put on some of Anna's deodorant and headed for the door – the redhead was still in bed, refusing to get up, until she was forced to by the ticking clock. She lied on her stomach, her eyes closed. I kissed her lips gently, but the girl hardly stirred.

"mmhh, stop kissing – sleeping," she groaned. I giggled, as I tugged some of her red hair behind her ear.

"I'm gonna go," I said gently as the girl tried to open her eyes.

"Already?" She complained, obviously dissatisfied.

"Yes, I don't want to be late," I teased.

Before I knew it, Anna grabbed my wrist and pulled me down to her, wrapping her legs around me, and burying me under the comforter. She planted kisses all over my face. As I was struggling to untangle myself, her embrace only grew stronger, and finally I couldn't fight her anymore.

"I surrender, I surrender!" I laughed. The bombarding of kisses stopped, but she didn't loosen her grip. She was smiling brightly, a smile that reached her eyes – it was beautiful. Looking down at my girlfriend, I placed one hand on her cheek, and kissed her lips. Anna kissed me back eagerly, goofily, as she tried not to laugh.

"I'm gonna take you out on a date tomorrow night," she said when we broke apart. Her invitation made me smile.

"I'd like that," I said, "I'll pick you up at seven."

"Wait, I said _I_ was going to take _you_ on a date," Anna pointed out, still wearing her goofy grin. I pushed myself off of her, and Anna let out a dissatisfied whine.

"You got to do it last time, now it's my turn," I laughed while exiting the door.

I shot her a tiny wave before leaving, and just pulled her comforter up under her chin, and lied back in bed.

"You are gonna be so late," I mumbled teasingly. Anna just shot a hand up and wafted it, indicating for me to scram. I couldn't retain the giggles bubbling up. The night had been wonderful, in spite of the thunder. Falling asleep in Anna's arms was the definition of perfection. If only I could fall asleep like that every night.

* * *

><p>"You smell different," Kristoff commented during lunch.<p>

"And weren't you wearing that outfit yesterday?" Sven continued. Those two could be an old married couple sometimes. I rolled my eyes, and shrugged. Sven leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. He shot one knowing glance at Kristoff, and nudged his head in the blond's direction.

"She got laid," Sven snorted.

"Totally," Kristoff agreed, stuffing his mouth with fries.

"What?! No, I-I…" _ oh shit, oh shit, oh shit…_

"So, who's the lucky fella'?" Sven asked, popping his feet up on the chair next to me. He folded his arms behind his head, and looked at me expectantly.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said as coldly as I could manage, and picked off the dull tomatoes from my sandwich.

"Really now? Well…" Sven started, sitting more upright than before now, "how'd you get that hicky?"

I stopped in mid-motion, tomato-slice dangling between my fingers. Frantically, I threw the food in my hand onto my tray, and dug deep into my purse, pulling out a pocket mirror. And right there, right above my collarbone, on my snowy white skin, was a purple bruised spot. _Anna you little…_ my mind growled. I sat stiff in my seat. Sven and Kristoff just looked at me, loving every minute of it.

"My ex is in town," I yelped.

Their eyebrows shot up into their hairlines. The expressions they wore were priceless, and for a moment, I didn't feel bad about lying. Little did I consider whether it was clever to advertise such information, especially with the uncontrollable rumour mill at this school, but for now it was a passable cover.

"The mysterious dude that you refuse to talk about?" Sven asked curiously. I'd never seen him like this, his expression displayed curiosity, and perhaps a little jealousy. I had mentioned my past relationship briefly to Kristoff once a while back. He was whining over Anna, and I couldn't stand listening to it any longer, ergo, I decided to give him crappy relationship advice.

"What was his name again, Jake? Josh?" Kristoff started.

"Jack." My voice was stiff. _Oh please, guys just leave it…_ My luck didn't stretch that far today, and Sven and Kristoff interrogated me throughout the remainder of lunch. They loved seeing squirm in my seat. They were relentless, asking into every detail of everything they could think of – both dying of laughter when my face turned as red the tomatoes I'd picked off my sandwich. _Anna, you are _so_ going to pay for that hicky placement… _


	19. All is fair in blood and gore

**Chapter 19 – All is fair in blood and gore**

**Heads up/warning: **um, yeah, intimate scenes. Also, I apologize for the horrible word play title lol. I'm pretty much naming my chapters randomly.

* * *

><p>I picked Anna up at seven. We'd agreed to go to an old movie theatre outside of town. The theatre was outdated, Anna had explained, so we were not going to meet anyone from school there; that was certain. I pulled up behind a parked car a few streets away from Anna's house – in case Kristoff was home. I sat in the car, applying some lip balm, observing myself in the rear-view mirror. The door was torn open, and I jumped in my seat, nearly getting lip balm in my eye.<p>

"Hey gorgeous," Anna smiled, as she jumped into the car. She had one hand in the pocket of her army-green jacket, and holding something in the other. She reached over and kissed me hello, as I turned on the engine. Before I got a chance to put the car in drive, Anna grabbed my hand.

"Wait," she said. "I have something for you."

With a shy smile – a feature that seemed foreign on the girl's lips – she handed me a flat package. It was wrapped in brown paper, sloppily draped with tape to hold the edges together.

Hesitantly, I took the gift and unwrapped it while warily eyeing Anna. She was biting her bottom lip in anticipation, her eyes focused on my fingers, as they were fiddling with the paper. The item in my hands revealed to be a black leather-bound book with large blank pages. In the corner of the leather were my initials. The pages were thick, and could easily withstand paint and markers.

"It's a drawing book," Anna stated, playing with her zipper. "The guy in the store said it was the best. I thought, since you seem to relax while drawing, it was would be good for you. I'm sure you can create something equally beautiful in here and spare your walls at the same time…," she laughed. It was a nervous laughter. I rarely saw Anna blush, but at this very moment, her cheeks were flaming.

"I-I in-carved the letters myself," she continued, as I still sat speechless. She was stumbling over the words now. She ran a finger over the two letters. I did the same, and our fingers touched. Our gazes met, my eyes drinking in the redhead, and her adorable awkwardness.

"D-do you like it?" She asked, pulling her hand away to fiddle with her zipper.

She was so precious, and I couldn't help but laugh. Anna looked up, confused for a second. As I clenched the sketchbook close to my chest, close to my heart, I grasped the collar of her jacket, and pulled her in for a searing kiss. The kiss had taken Anna by surprise, and she was left flabbergasted when I broke away from her.

"I love it," I said. "Thank you Anna."

For once, I had left Anna speechless. She simply sat and stared for while trying to comprehend the moment. Meanwhile I started the engine, which roared loudly as I pulled out on the road. As soon as we were on the road, Anna grabbed my hand, and held it in her lap. She was playing with my fingers, telling me about her day, and giving me directions to the cinema.

"Turn right here," she said, and continued talking about how she used to go to the movies with her dad during the winter, and how they would get caramel popcorn and corndogs.

"How can you never have tried caramel popcorn?" She asked in disbelief. "I mean, it's practically a delicacy!" She argued dramatically.

"I think we have two very different opinions of what's considered a delicacy," I snorted.

"Probably."

"But who am I to speak, in Norway they eat old fish."

"Ew, gross."

"And yet surprisingly appetizing," I giggled.

Anna made a repulsed grimace. Then she laughed out loudly, pulling my hand up to her mouth, and kissed it.

"I guess that's what you can expect from ABBA-loving drunk Vikings," Anna said matter-of-factly. I turned my head to see the girl wearing her goofy grin; closely resembling the look of a child who ate the last cookie. I couldn't help but smile. Anna's inner child was adorable to look at.

"Stereotypes are a wonderful thing," I said sarcastically.

I turned on the radio, and a lively saxophone suddenly filled the car with it's tunes. The song was upbeat, mixed with some electronic. It was jazzy in a sense, and a strong female vocalist broke through. I was about to change the station, figuring it was to the redhead's dislike. But Anna stopped my hand, by grapping it and pulling it back down into her lab.

"No leave it," she said. "It sounds amazing."

I'd noticed Anna's fascination towards classical music, but her taste seemed to be broader than that. Overall, the girl simply seemed to love instruments. Her foot would always tap against the floor when a piece of music she enjoyed was playing. As she was doing now. It was cute, seeing how her body would start responding to the beat. The younger girl didn't seem to be aware of it herself.

As the song ended, Anna's foot-tapping died out.

We sat for a moment, and I felt Anna's grip around my hand had stiffened. As the light turned red, I took the opportunity to give her a quick peck on the cheek. However, as my lips grazed her skin, I noticed her face had faltered. She was staring thoughtfully into the horizon, and then looked down in her lap.

"What's wrong?" I asked concerned. The light had turned green, and a honk sounded behind us. My temper nearly got the best of me, and I simply stepped on the speeder, fighting the urge to flick the guy off.

As we drove, Anna didn't look up from her lap. She had acted weird today, not her confident self. Anna had even been nervous about giving me the present – it wasn't like her. The girl could practically walk butt-naked around the school without giving a rat's ass what other people thought. However, when it came too close to her person, like with her dad, she would shut down. Like she was doing now.

"Tell me Anna."

"I um…so… I heard your ex is in town," Anna stated flatly. She sounded annoyed, maybe a bit arrogant. I didn't like it. Releasing my hand from her grip, I put it on the wheel.

"Don't believe everything you hear."

"Well… is he?" She persisted.

As I made a right turn, I couldn't help to get a tad annoyed at the way she had said it – as if I was to cheat on her. As if she wasn't the person I loved the most in this world, the person I would trust with my outmost secrets.

"Jesus Christ, no Anna. He lives in Norway for crying out loud. It doesn't seem a bit unrealistic to you that he would fly all the way here just to see me? I only needed to come up with an excuse, because _someone _wasn't careful where they placed their hicky's," I said annoyed. My grip around the wheel tightened, so much in fact, that my knuckles went white. I let out a loud sigh, breathing out slowly. It helped calm me down.

"I don't want to fight," I mumbled, never taking my eyes off the road.

"You're right I'm sorry." Anna breathed in deeply as well. "It's just all these nasty rumours has been going around. I was just so surprised when I heard about him, but understood why he would come all this way to see you … I mean, I would."

The last comment made my heart flutter, overruling the feeling of annoyance and distrust. I felt her eyes searching for mine. Of all the things she could have said… Anna just always knew the right thing to say. Instead of returning her gaze, I gave her my hand again, which she happily took.

When she started kissing my knuckles, the tension loosened up. Her lips tickled my skin, and left me smiling like a complete fool. We didn't speak for the remainder of the drive, but enjoyed the silence, simply being in each other's presence. There had been so much drama lately, in fact, ever since (and even before) Anna and I started dating. For once, everything seemed completely at ease. I liked Anna was closer to me now in a sense. Knowing what I knew about her and her family, made me feel important. Anna trusted me, and I trusted her.

I pulled into the parking lot. It was only half empty (or half full?), making it easy to find a spot. Darkness had already crept upon us, and the yellow streetlights guided us from the lot to the cinema. There was a tiny burger joint next to the theatre, accompanied by some other small shops. We were so far away from everything – it seemed as if Anna and I were in our own small world, our tiny personal universe, without the worries or responsibilities that the real world comprised.

We walked in, hand in hand, and headed for the movie posters that hung on the wall. We stood for what felt like hours, debating on what movie we should watch.

"I don't know, it looks so…violent," Anna sounded unsure.

"Well, it's either that, or another romantic comedy with Kate Hudson," I stated.

I knew how much Anna despised romantic movies. She thought they were platonic and unrealistic, and as she put it "cheesy as hell." Ergo, we decided on the thriller (not to Anna's satisfaction) and went to get soda and popcorn.

We sat in the theatre long before the movie even started. Luckily, we were the first one's there, so we could be as loud as we wanted. Anna popped her feet up on the chair in front of her, and leaned back in her seat. She took a swig of her soda, and I let her feed me some caramel popcorn. After admitting they weren't that bad after all, and Anna proclaiming they were the "food of Gods," we sat and chatted for a while.

Suddenly something struck me. A faint memory of a promise I had made earlier that week. The chocolate brown puppy-dog eyes was burned into my brain. The words rolled off my tongue before I could stop them.

"So…Kristoff…" I started, but quickly ran out of things to say._ Why are you talking up some dude to your girlfriend!? Really Elsa? How low can you sink? _I knew it was an empty promise, but for some reason, I felt like a more terrible friend if I didn't even try.  
>"Kristoff… Kristoff is a good guy," I hummed. Anna's gave me a weird stare – as if I was a complete and utter idiot.<p>

"Elsa, what's the matter with you? Why are we talking about Kristoff?" Anna just kept staring at me in disbelief. Her eyebrows were knitted together, her mouth pressed into a thin line. I sighed heavily in defeat. Anna sat forward in her seat, leaning closer towards me.

"Kristoff wanted me to put in a good word for him," I looked down at my hands, the embarrassment was agonizing.

"Why?" Anna asked laughing.

"He…kinda…sorta…has a crush on you…" It was quiet for a little while, until Anna burst out into a snort.

"I know," the younger girl giggled.

"You know?" A smile crept upon my lips. I felt bad for laughing, but relieved to hear the disinterest towards Kristoff in Anna's voice.

"I've known for years, the boy isn't exactly discreet." Anna leaned back in her seat again, placing her arms behind her head. She shrugged lightly, wearing a mischievous smile.

"Too bad I have to break his heart," she said, as she was some sort of evil villain. I punched her playfully on the shoulder.

"Hey! What am I supposed to do?" She giggled, "Kristoff is a nice guy and all, and deserves someone great. But I don't exactly play for his team." Her statement caught me by surprise.

"Wait…so, you're sure…?"

Anna smiled, and snuggled her coat closer around her torso.

"Well sure, I mean, I think I've come to terms with that I'm at least bi – probably gay," Anna said nonchalant, not making it sound like it was a big deal whatsoever. She looked so relaxed, so at ease. She was so down-to-earth. It was amazing to watch how a person could be so sure of oneself, she seemed so self-reliant and fearless. As if the idea of coming out didn't scare her.

"What about you?" She asked. It was the first time Anna and I had _really_ discussed our sexualities. I could tell she was tired of hiding.

"I still don't like boxes," I answered. Anna smiled, her face was beaming…she was proud.

Some people entered the theatre. A young couple, a boy and a girl, placed themselves behind us. I puffed Anna lightly, telling her to get her feet down. Anna choked back a laugh, mumbling 'yes mom' under her breath, before placing a kiss on my lips. The kiss caused a slight gasp from behind us. Anna snapped her head around to send a questioning – okay, threatening – glare at the couple. For some reason, I slightly enjoyed Anna's protective instinct. It made me feel like she was fighting for us.

The lights slowly died out and the commercials went on. Soon it was too dark to see a hand in front of you. Something heavy snaked around my shoulders. I felt the warmth of Anna's arm. _Wow, that was smooth you little bugger._

Honestly, the movie was a drag. Blood was hysterically splattered everywhere, as limbs where torn from bodies. Anna hadn't been understating when she said it looked violent. Halfway through, the scriptwriters had gone completely berserk, and the murderous killing scenes were somewhat… extremely visual. I took a quick glance over at Anna, who had retrieved her arm not too long ago. She was rubbing her forehead. Beads of sweats had gathered up on the girl's forehead. In the faint light from the screen, I could see Anna's pale complexion. Before I could react, Anna stood up abruptly.

"Jesus Christ, I think I'm gonna be sick," she stated, and then she walked out the theatre with hasty strides, cupping her hand over her mouth.

I sat perplexed for a moment, before darting after her. My eyes adjusted to the bright light as I entered the hallway, my eyes frantically searching for Anna's red hair. After a couple of minutes of searching the hallways, I decided to check the obvious places, such as the girl's bathroom.

"Anna?" I asked. The fluorescent light was agonizingly bright; it was like walking into a hospital.

"In here," a shaky voice mumbled. I walked over to the only open stall, where Anna had slumped down on the floor, partly hunched over the latrine. Her knees were pulled up underneath her, and she was leaning her head back. Her face was slightly green-ish, and she had broken into cold sweats.

"Hey," she whispered, her mouth curling up by the edges ever so slightly.

"Oh, Anna," I breathed, kneeling down next to her. My hand swept across her face, removing the stands of hair that was sticking onto her face. Her skin was cold, with all the blood that had run from her head.

"You dizzy?" I asked. Anna nodded, swaying lightly with every bob of her head. Guiding her, I made her put her head between her legs, placing my hand at the back of her head.

"Now, push your head upwards."

Anna complied, and I pushed back against my hand. We sat like that for a few second, I could feel the girl tense beneath me. "This should help the blood rush back to your head." Anna sat up straight again, as I reached into my pocket for a chewing drop. Carefully, I placed it in Anna's mouth, and watched her chew. The sugar would help.

"Where'd you learn that?" Anna's fragile voice asked.

"I used to get really dizzy when playing sports when I was younger. My dad showed me a few tricks, being a pilot and all," I explained while leaning against her. Wrapping my arms around her, we sat on the cold tiles.

"I've never been much for blood," she said, breathing steadily.

"Says the to-be marine biologist," I snickered.

"That's different!" She exclaimed. "Humans are gross…besides, I don't suspect blood will be splattering like that on the job." I was relieved to see the colours reappear in her cheeks; they were slowly becoming rosy again.

"Sorry I ruined our date," Anna whispered.

"You didn't – the movie was crap anyway," I assured her. We both giggled. After some intense convincing, a little snuggling – and yes, some kissing – we finally got off the floor, and walked hand in hand to my car. We passed the couple who had sat behind us in the theatre. They send us odd stares when they saw our intertwined fingers. But I didn't care. Because Anna's confident smile brightened up when she caught my eyes. A smile that said, "_screw 'em,_" just like the one she had send me at the aquarium.

* * *

><p>The clock almost stroke ten as we entered the door to my room. I had driven us home, shooting quick glances at Anna as I drove. Anna had leaned her head against the car door, opening the window and sucking in all the fresh air that pounded at her face as we drove. It seemed to her help, and her complexion soon started to look normal again.<p>

When we reached the apartment, she was all better. I took the chance of inviting her in as we stood awkwardly outside the door, not wanting to say goodbye, not wanting to part.

As we entered my room, Anna went to sit by my desk. Instead of placing herself on the chair, she decided simply to lean against the table. She investigated the framed picture, the only picture, which was placed neatly next to my computer. I hung my coat on a hanger outside my door, and stepped out of my shoes, re-entering the room and closing the door behind me.

"This your mom?" She asked. I nodded.

"She's beautiful," Anna said, "you look like her."

It made me smile, knowing it came from Anna. However, my mind was elsewhere. There was this tension, this electricity, between us. It had been there all night, but I was only now acknowledging it entirely. It was the same feeling, the same energy, which had been present the first time Anna had ever kissed me. The night I had pushed her away, left her standing in the cold, and locked myself away completely.

Standing there, looking at her, I realized how much I'd grown since moving here. How all these feelings, that I didn't know still existed within me, was bubbling up inside of me, waiting to be let loose and set free. I wanted to show Anna how she made me feel. I wanted to show how far I'd come, how much I'd grown. And all because of her.

Her hands were wrapped around the edge of the table, arms stretched, which made her shoulders hover next to her ears. She looked calm, wearing her usual smile, and tilting her head a bit. I took a deep breath, suddenly feeling anxious.

The dim moonlight shone through the crack in the curtains above my bed. I stood still in the center of the room, hugging my arms tightly around my body. I was shivering lightly, and all I wanted to do – all I could entirely think about – was to walk confidently towards Anna, and kiss her senselessly.

Nevertheless, an instinct – a horrible instinct really – instructed me to remain put, even though it meant fighting the sizzling urge to grab Anna and throw her onto the bed. It wasn't in my nature to be this bold. I did not possess such bravery. The kind of bravery Anna had shown by defending us from the mocking couple behind us. That kind of bravery that would carry me across the room, and kiss Anna passionately.

Instead, Anna walked towards me, perhaps seeing my internal struggle; and I let her come to me, knowing that my feet wouldn't respond, even if I commanded them to walk. Her hands tangled their way around my waist, and she pulled me closer.

Our hips collided. Anna taking the control calmed me down a bit. She let me raise her chin, with a trembling finger, so I could kiss her more deeply. The warmth spread through my system, as if alcohol was boiling in my blood. The butterflies in my stomach would not stop flapping their wings, and for a moment, I thought that by holding my breath I could suffocate them until they fell flat to the bottom of my tummy.

We broke apart only for a brief moment.

"Anna, I…" I started saying beneath her lips. "This is new to me, and I'm not sure…" but knowing what I was going to say she just interrupted me with her lips on mine.

Then she took my hand and put on her chest so I could feel how fast her heart was beating, proving to me she was every bit as nervous as I was. I slowly started to loosen up, my tense muscles relaxing bit by bit.

Cautiously I unzipped her jacket, and wrenched it off her, by pushing it away from me. She let go of me for a second, so her hands could meet on her back, and help me remove the jacket. It fell to the floor with a _thud_. Quickly, she stepped out of her shoes using the tip of her shoes. Carefully she led me towards the bed, pushing me ever so lightly with her body until I lied beneath her.

My thighs clenched against her hips. I pulled her down towards me, our lips meeting for an intense kiss. Every cell in my body was spinning, and as Anna's tongue daringly entered my mouth, I intertwined our fingers. I could hardly restrain a moan as she licked my bottom lip. She released my lips, which immediately left me longing for more, and trailed kissed across my jaw-line, all the way to the crook of my neck.

I really didn't have much to go on except for what I'd seen in movies. I was trembling, taking quick heavy gasps for air, while my shaking hands tried to undress myself. Anna helped me pull my blue midi-dress over my head, leaving me half-naked with a leg on each side of her body.

My heart was racing.

It beat so hard it felt like it would fly out of my chest any moment. For once, the anxiety and guilt was pushed away, shoved away by a stronger force – a force known as an entirely new uncontrollable feeling which was building up in the pit of my stomach. It was lust. I was yearning for the redhead's touch, aching to be released from this burning desire that was slowly, but surely, taking over my body.

My knees clenched tightly around her hips, as I now unbuttoned her slim jeans. Anna leaned backwards to get rid of her shirt, easily pulling it over her head in a quick motion. The way her body was stretched out so perfectly for a short moment, exhibiting her slender figure, left me dumbstruck.

Then she leaned down over me, locking eyes with me again. I lifted myself up so Anna could slip a hand under my back, and unclasp the hook of my bra. It slowly came off, and Anna threw it away sloppily. It was as if my room had become a vortex, swallowing everything that surrounded us. All that was left was Anna and I. Only us. All that was on my mind was her, her touch, her smell, her being. The weight of her on top of me was the only thing that reassured me that I wasn't floating on a cloud. That I wouldn't be floating away.

Anna readjusted herself, moving one leg to the other side of my thigh, leaving only a single knee between my legs. My hands followed the concave track up her spine, until reaching her bra, which I then smoothly unhooked. Anna smiled between the kisses, whispering 'I love you' in my ear. Then she led her hand gently cupping my breast, as my hands trailed the edge of her pants. I pulled down her jeans revealing her Sloggi's. Anna nearly had to get completely off the bed to get rid of the jeans entirely. Nevertheless, I soon felt her hot body against mine again.

Our stomachs were grinding together. She felt so strong against me, I could barely contain myself. Her knee gently pushed against my core, making my back arch, causing me to thrust myself into the girl. Anna's breasts were against mine, and the softness of them had my fingers dig into the bed sheets. Thrusting a knee against Anna's core rewarded me with a sensual moan. I could feel her wetness soaking through her underwear. Pressure was starting to build up inside of me, and it was almost too much. I found it problematic to relax. My head was spinning, thinking a million thoughts a second. Was Anna enjoying herself? Was I doing this right? What if our neighbours heard us?

_Stop thinking, stop thinking, stop thinking…_

Releasing the sheets, I clung on tightly to Anna, digging my nails into her back as we were thrusting against each other. Anna pulled back, allowing the burning sensation between my legs to continue, and I was left in excruciating agony and longing after her touch.

"Relax," she whispered soothingly, kissing my jaw. None of us tried to get our breaths under control, knowing it would be a lost cause. Slowly and gently she glided a hand over my stomach, working its way south. As her fingers was searching for my core, I realized something. At that precise moment, I was grateful to have gotten a second chance for my first time. And never again would I underestimate the importance and perfectness of doing it with someone you love.

Anna slipped a clumsy hand underneath my panties, her fingers seeking for my longing core. To create more working-space for her, I widened my legs. The heat between them were nearly unbearable at this point, but I let her fumble for a couple more seconds, before reaching an assisting hand down. Carefully I guided her hand to my center, and soon felt her touch where I was most longing to be touched.

A slight gasp escaped my lips, and Anna smirked in victory. However, I couldn't pay much attention to the girl's facial features as the pure bliss of her touch was fogging my mind. My skin was tingling where Anna trailed her touches on my body. Her fingers were luring by my entrance. Her lips were now on my neck again. My hips bucked to meet her touch, and Anna ran a finger over my clit once more.

Soon she found a rhythm, and everything seemed to accelerate so fast from there. My breath picked up, and I found myself calling out her name in pure adoration. I didn't want her to stop, I _needed_ her. She picked up her pace, and let a single digit slip inside. I moaned loudly, not being able to retain myself, even though I tried my hardest. Anna made tiny sounds as she kissed my collarbone, tracing her teeth over the sensitive skin. I leaned my head back, realizing my moans were only growing louder. I arched my head back, holding onto Anna with my dear life. Every thought I had once withheld was knocked out of my head. For just a few seconds, there was no worrying, no guilt and no shame.

"It's okay," Anna whispered between kisses, "just let go." And I did. As soon as she pressed onto the sensitive knob of nerves with her thumb, and let a second finger slip inside of me, I reached my peak. Anna pressed her body and lips against me, as I screamed out her name.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** So I've never written intimate stuff before. I hope it was okay…

I let me inspire by the song "Let your Fingers do the Walking" by Sort Sol…if…you know…you were wondering…I'm sure you were… :P

Also, the song they were listening to on the radio was "Jubel" by Klingande


	20. Control

**Chapter 20 – Control**

**Heads up/warning: **Adult contents, language and violence.

* * *

><p>Sex. Let's just get it out there, sex with Anna was extraordinary. We could hardly get enough of each other, and barely keep our hands to ourselves at school – we knew better than that of course.<p>

Well, _I_ knew better than that.

Our secret meetings often resulted in some heavy kissing, which I – the mature and sane person – had to cut short. Anna would just laugh and kiss me on the nose, before putting her beanie back on (which she would have lost in the heat of the moment).

I had never imagined it being something like this. Anna and I had such a deep emotional connection, but being with her and having such an intimate physical connection as well, had my mind go crazy.

It took an astonishingly short amount of time to find Anna's weak-spots. Soon, I knew her body better than my own. I knew that she hated me touching her feet. I knew how sensitive the skin between her breasts was. I learned that she found my waistline incredibly sexy. I knew how much she loved me kissing her shoulders and neck. And I learned how insanely ticklish she was by ears.

It had merely been two weeks since our first time together. I thought back to that morning.

Anna was laying on her stomach, sleeping soundlessly in all her naked glory, only the light comforter covering her up from the waist down. I could stare at her for hours – which I didn't, because that would be creepy.

But I did observe her for some time. The way her shoulders would rise and fall concurrently with every breath she took. Trailing a finger over her back, I laid on my side, solely admiring my redhead. She had fallen asleep with her ponytail, but I didn't have the heart to wake her by removing the hairband, and let those fiery locks loose.

In the end, I couldn't resist, and I had to trail my mouth over those glorious shoulder-blades or hers. If there was one thing that I had learned, it was that Anna did not like being disturbed while sleeping. A loud (rather aggravated) groan sounded.

"What time is it?" Anna murmured into her pillow. Releasing my lips from that freckled skin of hers, I turned to look over at my nightstand. _05:14, oops…_

In my lack of response, Anna turned to look at the clock herself. Anna let out an exaggerated noise of displeasure, which could easily be closely resembled to a dying animal.

"You better have a really good reason for waking me…," she mumbled sleepily.

_I do not, but no one should look this cute while sleeping, so it's your own fault._

"Anna, we got school," I whispered gently, kissing her again. We both knew that no one would get up so inhumanely early to get ready for mythology studies – not even me.

"Don't make me sucker punch you this early in the morning," Anna complained, a playful smile resting upon her lips. She turned onto her side. I snickered, running my hand through her bangs. Before getting up, I kissed her once on the nose.

"I'm sorry, go back to sleep," I said.

Anna smiled and closed her eyes, snuggling back into the covers. Meanwhile, I headed for the bathroom, and turned on the hot water to let it run for a bit before getting in. I stood and observed myself in the mirror, which was slowly becoming foggy from the steamy shower.

I stretched my arms over my head, and heard a satisfying _pop_ coming from my spine. My back had been aching from last night's activities – perhaps not the activities themselves, but from the tense and nervous state I had been stuck in.

The hot water was soothing my aching muscles, untangling the knots that had viciously placed themselves in my neck and back. As I stood letting the water soak me, and comfort me, I felt a pair of firm hands rest on my waist. Startled, I turned around, finding Anna standing behind me. The water slowly swallowed us both; we stood under the showerhead, in each other's embrace. Anna's lips on my shoulder, and my lips on her neck.

The steam fogged up the shower walls. Anna's hands ran down my sides, grabbing onto my rear squeezing it firmly. The kissing grew rougher, and suddenly I found myself pushed against the wall. In a smooth movement, Anna pushed one leg between mine to separate them.

"No," I whispered under her lips. "My turn."

Last night, Anna had been the one to set things off, being the first to give. Afterwards we had switched, and I had been working my fingers as skilfully as I could.

We still had a lot to learn, but still nothing came close to how amazing it indeed had felt. Just as I thought we were done, and too exhausted to continue, Anna had pulled off my panties completely and proceeded to pleasure me with her mouth. Now, I never got to return the favour. So with that, I pushed Anna back against the shower wall, claiming dominance. We were out of reach from the heavy drops from the showerhead.

There was this energy between us. Adrenaline was fired within me, driving me mad with lust. But it wasn't just lust and desire. It wasn't just purely primal. There was love involved. I could feel it radiating from Anna. Every touch I received from her was so packed with loved. She was so careful. She respected me. She loved me.

I was filled with love to the bursting point. I don't think I'd ever received such large an amount from anyone. Honestly, I still knew nothing about love, which was perhaps why I referred to it as if it was some sort of product_. Yes, I'd like to order ten grams of love please. Or litres? I don't know which unit love comes in. Depends if you snort it or drink it._ Either way, you definitely got high from love.

I kneeled, and quickly grabbed a hold of Anna's hips. Her hand had already found my hair, and she had widened her legs, making room for me. I kissed the insides of her thighs, until running a tongue over her womanhood. Anna was much better at containing her moans than I was, but she definitely had to fight hard to keep them down. My mouth was working, and I was flicking my tongue over her sensitive spot.

It wasn't long until she tightened the grip around my hair, and arched her back letting out a pleasure filled moan. Anna was left flushed and panting. I kissed my way up her stomach until I reached her lips. She smiled at me, and I smiled at her. And there we stood kissing until we were almost late for school.

* * *

><p>School was hectic again but not in the stomach-wrenching way it had used to be. Nala still wanted my head on a plate, but she seemed to be too preoccupied at the moment – with what, I had no idea.<p>

Kristoff and Sven busted my ass for not replying their messages quickly enough – if replying at all. Spending so much time with Anna in all secrecy occupied an extravagant amount of my time. Admittedly, I had been neglecting the two a bit lately. Partly because I could barely look Kristoff in the eye, because of the guilt. And the other part was basically that I enjoyed spending time with Anna.

As I sat in chemistry, next to Sven, I received a text message from Anna. I was hesitant about opening it during class. _Please don't be dirty, please don't be dirty…_ I begged as I grabbed my phone, and held it discreetly under the table.

**Anna **[12:45]: _Mom's at soccer practice with Olaf – house all to ourselves ;) C u after school 3_

Sven send me a curious look, which made my blood run cold. Had he seen?

"Texting Anna I see," he smirked. "So tell me, how is it receiving tutoring from the devil's assistant?" He whispered teasingly. Relieved that he had only seen her name flashing across my screen, but annoyed by the insult towards Anna. However not angry enough to blow our cover, I gave him a stiff smile.

Two and a half hours later, I found myself outside of Anna's front door. Before I could even knock, the door was ripped open, and Anna pulled me inside by the collar. Her lips were already on mine, tongue exploring its way through my mouth.

I didn't object – rather, I _couldn't_ object. She pushed me against the wall as she closed the door with her foot. We managed to get all the way to her room – stumbling like idiots, yes – without breaking the kiss. I shrieked as Anna pushed me down on her bed, letting us both fall and hit the madras. We both giggled, panting lightly. I sat up, and Anna straddled me.

As she was sitting on my lab, a leg on each of my sides, Anna started kissing my neck.

"Anna… not here," I said in a husked voice, my mind begging for her to continue.

"Why not?" the girl asked sadly, and started pouting – which was ridiculously cute.

"You live on the ground floor, and those things you call curtains are practically see-through. People could easily see us!" I stated.

Anna's hands were cupping my face now, one thumb gently stroking my cheek. She looked lost in thought for a moment. She sighed heavily.

"Always the responsible one," she laughed. She sat with my face in her hands for a little while. Our noses were touching.

"Well, I guess we'll have to find somewhere else then," Anna said with a smirk, and her eyes flickered towards the two white doors leading to the walk-in closet. Anna quickly got on her feet, and practically dragged me towards the closet.

"Closet-sex? How ironic," I commented with a grin.

From the moment we closed the doors, she pinned me against the dresser, which was the only thing that wasn't covered with hangers and clothes. She scooped me up, as if I was as light as a feather, and she stood between my legs.

I got rid of Anna's jacket, allowing her more mobility. The freckled girl looked at me, her eyes were hungry with desire, I could tell. Over the past few weeks, I'd grown much more comfortable around the concept of sex. Anna had guided me, pulled me out of my shell, and soon I stopped doubting myself so much.

I placed a hand on each side of myself, lifting myself up just by the slightest. Popping the button open on my jeans, she pulled them down to my angles along with my underwear. I slowly made room for her, as she placed her mouth on my inner thy. The satisfaction that Anna's tiny moans caused me was indescribable.

As her tongue pressed towards my wet core, my fingers found her hair. I pushed her face closer to me, as I panted heavily. My leg was now resting on her shoulder. As I mentioned, I wasn't very good at concealing my moans, and it only grew worse as the pressure build up when she slipped a finger inside of me, and my vocal cords were put to test.

Her mouth and hands were working intensely, desperately attempting to satisfy me. Her struggles were definitely paying off as my grip on Anna's hair became tighter. As she slipped a second digit inside of me, my moans grew louder.

I felt myself tighten around her fingers. I leaned back against the wall, knocking down a couple of hair products, and clenched my free hand around the edge of the dresser. As I climaxed, I heard a car pull into the driveway. Hastily I shot my free hand up to cover her mouth. My eyes went wide when Anna heard the same – now the sound of car doors being closed.

_What? They can't be home already!_

But apparently they could.

"Oh shit!" I yelped, barely having time to enjoy my high. We both stumbled out of the closet, me frantically pulling up my pants, and Anna wiping her mouth with her sleeve. Both sitting panting on the bed, we stared at each other in shock.

There was a knock on the door. Frantically, Anna tried to smooth down her hair. I had really made it my mission to ruffle it completely out of its braids with my one hand. The door opened, and Mrs. Anderson's head peeped out from the creak.

"Hey honey, we're back early," Mrs. Anderson cooed. Anna's face was red, as was mine. Mrs. Anderson looked towards me, as if she was only now noticing my presence.

"Oh hello Elsa. Nice to see you, are you staying for dinner?"

"Yes!" Anna said, a tad too quickly. "Yes, she is."

The older woman eyed us with suspicion. Then she just smiled and left the room. The moment the door closed, Anna and I both had to stifle our laughter. We fell back on the bed and kept giggling.

* * *

><p>Control. <em>I want control<em>. I took a deep breath. As I exhaled, I closed my eyes. Being in love did _not _suffice my body. It was fighting me. Actually, on second thought, I believe it suited my body just fine; it was just my mind that was the problem.

I was standing yet again in the gym, all alone with my speed wraps on. It was late, as dinner at Anna's was prolonged, because Olaf wanted to play PlayStation with me. Of course, I couldn't turn down the adorable cuteness that was the boy, and Anna agreed to watch. I let him win most of the time, not from the goodness of my heart, but mostly to impress Anna honestly.

As usual, Anna was occupying my every thought. However, something else had my mind racing. School was becoming a burden again. My grades were not bad, but definitely not good either. Finals were only a few months away, and I hadn't applied to any universities. My sense of direction was as askew as a compass surrounded by a thousand magnets. Of course, my father knew nothing about these predicaments. The stress was nearly crushing me, and Anna was the only thing that could keep my head straight – as ironic as it sounded.

My drawing book had come in handy lately. The overwhelming feelings of misdirection was testing my nerves. Therefore, the nights I couldn't spend in Anna's arms, I spend hunched over my drawing book – a great alternative to wrecking my room or painting on the walls.

I didn't show Anna any of my work – not yet at least. Right now, I was drawing for me.

Drawing everything I felt. I drew my dreams. My nightmares. A faceless character kept reappearing. A slender, simple, tall figure became a reoccurring central character on my works. Often drawn in the context of being trapped inside boxes or floating away into space. It was incredible what a marker or a pencil could create. No, actually, it was neither the pencil nor the marker that was creating anything – it was me. The thought gave me a sense of accomplishment.

As I focused on my footwork – sweat beats blandly soaking through the pores on my forehead – I suddenly noticed the shrieking sound of the door opening behind me. I turned, and there Anna stood, perfect as she was. She was wearing a white baseball shirt, with red sleeves. Her hair was tied up in a high ponytail, messy as usual. I lowered my parades, exposing myself to my imaginary opponent.

"Hi," she said, a faint smile luring on her luscious lips. She approached me and planted a quick peck on my lips. Her eyelashes were so long, her mascara making her look like she just popped out of a Max-Factor commercial. Anna was wearing her skinny jeans again, really showing off her figure, and her sexy hips.

"Hi," I said back.

I couldn't help but smile, even though I hated being interrupted during my training. In addition, I didn't feel particularly attractive standing there sweating, like a thick grey cloud had just drizzled its load of water on me. The best I could hope for was a sexy glow. _Ha! Who am I kidding?_

"So this is where you come to blow off steam?" She asked as she walked around. My heart was beating harder than when I was at the peak of my workout, just by looking at her.

"Not exactly," I smiled at her and she smiled back. She was wandering around, absorbing her surroundings. I watched her as she curiously picked up some boxing gloves from the basket in the corner and tried them on.

"So, why do you come here so much?"

I thought about that for a bit while I helped her get the gloves on. Still thinking, I pulled her closer to the centre of the room.

"I don't actually know," I answered.

I chewed on my bottom lips, thinking hard. Why _did_ I come here so often? Health and physical vigour was important, of course, but there was more to it.

"Sometimes I just feel so…weak," I heard myself saying. "Which is probably why I focus so much on physical strength. Because my mental strength isn't exactly adequate…This way, I can at least pretend to be strong… does that make sense at all?" I laughed, a bit embarrassed of my newly found confession. Anna nodded lightly.

"Balanced body, but wobbly mind," she said, smiling her crooked smile. I huffed lightly, amused by Anna's effortless rephrasing of my words.

"I guess this is my hiding place," I finally answered.

I stood behind her now, guiding her into the correct pose with my body. Legs shoulder-width apart, slightly bended knees. Anna's body sculptured after mine, her back against my chest. I grabbed her arms and pulled them up in front of her face, not letting go of them. Slowly, I followed through with a punch – still not letting go of her wrists – Anna mimicking my motions. I let go.

"Now you try," I said, even though I hated letting go of her. Carefully she threw a punch into the air. Then she threw another one at the punching bag; it hardly wiggled. She smiled, and started removing the gloves again.

"What are you hiding from?" She asked, looking me straight in the eye. I pulled off her gloves.

"I don't know," I confessed. "I mean, I'm not sure. Reality perhaps."

No one said anything for a couple of second. She was just staring into my eyes, and mine into hers. Then she closed hers and pulled me closer. My hand grabbed around her neck, and I could feel her breath between my lips. We were interrupted by a horribly loud noise coming from where Anna had just entered.

"Elsa!? I know you're in here!" It was my father, and he did not sound happy. _Me and my damn notes_. It was probably time to consider whether leaving a note every time I left the house was such a good idea after all.

"Hurry, hide in here," I whispered to Anna who had written panic all over her face.

She had never officially met my father, and if it was up to me, she never should. Anna made it into the grey metal closet. I was leaning up against it until she had settled down in there.

"Yeah, I'm in here!" I said louder than necessary to cover the noise from the closet.

The door slammed open, not aggressively, just firmly; my father rarely lost hold of his temper completely. For a moment, we stood facing one another other. I tried to keep my face as blank and emotionless as possible.

What was all this fuzz about? He held something in his hand, between two fingers, and soon he started walking closer towards me. For a brief moment, I was in pure shock considering the possibility of my father finding out about Anna and me. Then I thought back to the item he held between his pointer finger and thumb, and I was certain that his fury was related to its contents, and in a heartbeat, I was not that worried anymore.

"Can you explain to me what this is?" We stood a couple of metres apart, and he held out his hand, carefully exhibiting the cigarette he was holding between two fingers.

For a moment I searched my memory, until it struck me that it was the cigarette I had grabbed from Anna's lips the night I had picked her up at the party.

"Where'd you get that?" I asked.

"It fell out of your coat this evening when I hung it up on the rag," he explained, his eyes stern.

"What are we going to do about this Elsa?" He asked, entirely serious. I thought about protesting, claiming it wasn't mine – which actually, it wasn't – but the evidence seemed quite clear, and I knew my father wouldn't buy it. _But you can't just let him believe you started smoking!_ My mind protested, and for once, it had a point.

"It's not mine," I stated, my voice firm.

He put down the cigarette, and took his jacket and tie off. From the corner, he grabbed a couple of punching mittens. My father had this tendency to drag out the tension as long as possible. I never started questioning, that annoyed him, and I was sure he wasn't happy with me already.

Then he walked towards me. We now stood facing each other, and his parades went up, casually in no hurry. I sighed heavily – I really didn't want to do this now, especially not with Anna hiding in the closet.

He indicated to me to throw a punch at him. He blocked with the mitt. We did this for a while, me throwing punches, and him blocking. For the first time he threw a punch and I ducked. The way he stood there, perfunctory in front me, as if he wasn't even making an effort.

"I will not tolerate smoking," he announced. I said nothing, but simply placed my fist perfectly into the palm of his glove. I avoided eye contact.

"Forstår du det?" he asked.

I knew things were getting serious when he switched to Danish. It was habit he had picked up after my mother left. He was still holding a grudge, therefore only using her mother tongue when he was to deliver sad or angry news. I swallowed hard, but kept beating in his palms.

"Jeg stilte dig et spørgsmål Elsa," he said firmly. I didn't know what to respond.

"Ja," I answered. "Det forstår jeg godt."

Silence again.

Only the sounds of my fist colliding with his hands.

Suddenly his arm flew up and hit me on the side of the head before I could duck. The punch threw me off balance, and it was too late to block the next punch that was aimed straight at my nose. My arms came up, and I bended over, to protect my face. Blood was gushing out of my nose, and stained the black rubber floor.

I could taste the cold metal flavour on my teeth. He kept throwing punches until I was knocked up against the metal locker Anna was hiding in. First then he stopped. Breathless and in shock I stood, trying to get myself together.

My father had already thrown off the mittens and picked up his jacket and tie. As he walked out he said: "Du må hellere fralægge dig den ulækre vane Elsa. Jeg skal ikke have en datter som ryger." There was disgust in his voice. And then he was gone.

Anna flew out of the closet. She rushed to my side; her face first displaying fury, then pity. To her this was all so perplex. I didn't want her near me. Instinctively I turned my back to her, while trying to get a hold on all the blood still flowing from my nose.

"What the hell was that?" She asked while tenaciously trying to make me face her so she could have a look at my injury. My blood covered hands delicately tried to push her away. I'd never felt so small.

"It was nothing," I mumbled.

"That sure as hell didn't look like nothing!"

"Just leave it Anna!" I snapped. I regretted it immediately.

"Let me take a look at it Elsa!" She said forcefully. "It looks pretty bad, just let me help you," she begged insistently.

The lump in her throat made me drop my guards. I let her lead me over to the locker where she made me sit. Carefully she leaned my head back. I never stopped looking at her, while very focused she diligently cleaned me up. The blood had congealed. She dabbed the blood from my face and hands with a damp cloth. When she was done, she just sat there and looked at me expediently.

"Are you going to explain to me what the fuck just happened?" She asked. As per usual, I said nothing. Instead, I got up and started collecting my things. Anna huffed loudly.

"So you're just going to let him hit you like that? Elsa, you can't let him treat you this way! You need to tell someone, I mean, he could get arrested for this!"

"It was a boxing match! You are supposed to hit your opponent," I stated on the edge to fury.

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that Elsa. We both know it was more than that."

"I said leave it Anna."

Finally, I figured that my life with Anna – the life I had been urging for, for so long – would be a life without complete control. This would take some time getting used to.

Obviously, Anna wouldn't leave it, it wasn't in her nature not to. She liked dealing with things head-on, with the exception of her father's death. I took a deep breath, fighting the urge to bold from the room, and hide away somewhere.

It wasn't that anger hadn't filled my system when his punches had hit me, or that the adrenaline wasn't eating me up inside, begging to be released in some sort of physical outlet. The sadness was overwhelming as well, not overruling the anger however, but it was there.

"Elsa…," Anna's hand were cupping my cheeks now.

"He isn't a bad guy," I said absentmindedly.

"Elsa, your nose is bleeding again…," she pointed out. Anna picked up the cloth, and started dapping my face. "He made you bleed Elsa. He hit you…" Tears were welling up in her eyes. They were tears of anger. Her jaw was clenched.

"Stop it Anna," my voice cracked as I said it.

"I seriously don't understand why you take all this crap from someone who clearly isn't interested in being a part of your life. At least not the way you want him to be. You're trying to live up to these standards that he has set for you, and he clearly doesn't even care. Why can't you see that?" I tore free from her grip.

The feeling of my brain going into overdrive made me dizzy. It was as if my mind was going into a circuit, as if my brain was a CD with a scratch, jumping incomprehensively through the tracks.

"He isn't a bad guy," I insisted.

He really wasn't. No, he was far from the father you would strive for, but he was the best I'd got. And honestly, I didn't believe I was worth much more than what he gave me. My mother had been the main cause of that. The feeling of never being good enough. Knowing someone chose to leave you… that just gets to you and it will eat you up, piece by piece, bit by bit… if you let it. And I had let it – I had let it eat me up for way too long now, and I was in too deep.

"He's all I have."

Anna gently put her hands on my shoulder, looking me deep into the eye.

"That's not true Elsa… you have me. You have Kristoff and Sven, and Gerda…"

"How could you possibly understand?" My voice was shaking. "Your father didn't leave you. You have no idea how it feels knowing that someone purposely abandoned you! Like you weren't enough to keep them around."

The expression on Anna's face changed. She immediately knew I was talking about my mother suddenly. She looked at me in shock. I wanted to smash something. The punching bag. The wall. Anything.

"No you are right; I don't know what that feels like," she said "Because my dad didn't abandon me. He was taken from me. He died Elsa. I'm sorry that I can't compete with your run-away mother."

"I'm not trying to compete with you Anna," I spat harshly, turning my back to her once again. The room fell quiet for a little while. We were both stuck with a lump in our throats – I knew I was at least.

"You know, I'll never get a chance to talk to him again, tell him that I love him. You might…" Anna whispered.

"She doesn't want me, don't you get that!" I yelled. Fury accessed and controlled my entire body by now. My hands shaking from the pure rush of excess adrenaline.

"My father is not a bad person. Just oblivious."

"Why do you keep defending him!?"

"Because he is my _father_ Anna!" I screamed.

"Just because you descended from his balls, doesn't mean that he owns you!"

That one hit me like a train. How _dared_ she?

"Fuck you!" I screamed, while retrieving my duffle bag.

"Hey!" An alien voice sounded throughout the room. Anna and I fell silent as we looked towards the door. There Adam stood, obviously startled by the whole situation.

"What the hell is going on you guys?" Adam asked, half concerned and half annoyed.

"Nothing." I shot a glance towards Anna. Her eyes were wide with frustration and hurt.

"I was just leaving," I growled, and stormed passed Adam, smacking the door behind me.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** (Please don't hate me)

**Translation**

_Elsa's dad:_ Do you understand that?

_Elsa's dad:_ I asked you a question Elsa.

_Elsa:_ Yes, I understand.

_Elsa's dad:_ You better quit that disgusting habit Elsa. I shall not have a daughter who smokes.


	21. When everything crumbles

**Chapter 21 – When everything crumbles**

**Heads up/Warning: **Angst stuff and violence.

* * *

><p>The clouds hovered closely over the ground. They were thick and heavy with rain; it was only a matter of time before they would empty out their contents.<p>

As I was driving to school, the first few drops started falling. Neatly, they landed on my windshield, splashing out to twice their size as they collided with the glass. I turned the wipers on, and they started dancing back and forth.

My head was aching, and I could feel the pounding in my head, the repeating throbbing in my temples. I sat in my car for a few minutes in the school's parking lot, rubbing the sides of my head, and gathering courage to face Anna. We had first period together as usual, and after yesterday's fight, I wasn't too thrilled that I was forced into a compact classroom together with my redhead.

I knew I shouldn't have left like that, but she was ripping me open with vigorous hands – ripping open the wounds that I had tried too hard to conceal. When it came to my father, I just wanted to be left alone, and dwell in my own misery. My father and I was doing our thing, and I liked to believe that it was working – but even I couldn't deny that this lie was getting kind of old.

Finally, I stepped out into the rain, and walked towards the entrance. The rain soaked into my jeans, so I hurried. The school was already full of students roaming the hallways, even with fifteen minutes before class.

Sven stood by his locker, Kristoff leaning his back to the locker next to Sven's. They both appeared to be tired – perhaps annoyed? From afar, they didn't seem like their usual goofy selves.

As I walked towards them, my shoes squeaking from the wet rubber meeting the floor, I received a tremendous amount of stares. I was used to it by now, being Nala's punching bag and all, but this was ridiculous. All eyes were on me. The girls send me funny arrogant looks, while the boys looked at me like hungry lions, looking me up and down. My face adapted a dismayed expression as I kept walking towards the boys.

_What's going on?_

My footsteps slowed. Their eyes felt invasive the way they rested on my figure. Clutching the straps on my backpack tighter, I continued with hesitant steps. _I know my cheek is a bit swollen from yesterday's blow, but this is a bit extreme…_

As I reached Sven and Kristoff, I took a swift look over my shoulder to find the entire hallway of pupils ogling me. _They sure aren't subtle…_

Turning back to the bulky boys in front me, I noticed the tense expression on Kristoff's face. I tried to study it, but he looked away, not even acknowledging my presence. He had crossed his massive arms over his chest, making his biceps appear even more colossal.

"Hey guys…" I tried. Sven gave me a restrained smile, not hiding the effort he put into it. Grabbing another book from his locker, he spoke.

"Hey Els…" his voice was quiet, bearing a repugnant undertone. _Els? Sven has never called me 'Els' before. What happened to 'your majesty' or 'Viking-chick'? _Sven was an original, and would never settle for such an uncreative and tedious nickname.

"What's going on?" I asked.

Unexpectedly, I felt the sense of vulnerability creep onto me. Both boys were giving me the cold shoulder. _First Anna, now them?_ Without them, I felt even more alone at this humongous school. Like a lone target standing on a field in the middle of nowhere with the archer only a meter away.

"We could ask you the same thing," Kristoff suddenly snapped, his words sounded loathing. My eyes went wide by his tone. Kristoff was mad at times, but never this cold or furious. Sven remained surprisingly quiet, avoiding eye contact.

"What do you mean?" I asked, tired of guessing, as if I was shooting in the dark.

"Don't play dumb, Elsa. I saw you."

Sven still said nothing. It took some time to the information sink in. First, his words were incomprehensible, but then I remembered.

The window.

Kristoff living across the street.

Anna on my lap.

Anna kissing my neck.

He had seen everything.

Kristoff new about Anna and me. And by the looking of it, Sven knew too. In fact, zooming out completely, the whole school knew.

_Anna…oh shit…they are going to eat Anna alive. _I swallowed hard.

"Kristoff, I-I …" was all I could muster without starting to hyperventilate. _Breathe Elsa, breathe!_  
>"Oh, cut the crap, I fucking saw you with her," Kristoff snarled.<p>

I felt sick. Like, literally, I felt sick. Cold sweats started to surface, and my hands were getting clammy. Sven was looking at nothing, not engaging in the conversation. I grabbed a hold on the wall, fearing I might fall. Kristoff slammed Sven's locker door shut. The loud noise caught everyone's attention. His teeth were gritted, his brown eyes full of hate.

"I thought we were friends Elsa. Instead, you go behind my back, screwing the girl I like. Dude, I _talked _to you about her! You knew how I felt."

"I-I-I'm sorry Kristoff, I truly am…" I whispered, my voice betraying me. The shame weighed heavy. I couldn't look him in the eye. I couldn't.

_Breathe Elsa!_ I couldn't do that either.

"Fucking hell Elsa, you didn't even tell us you were gay." This time it was Sven talking.

"I-I'm, I-I-I thought…–" _stop stuttering you fool._

"That we wouldn't like you anymore? You think we're that shallow?"

"No! No, n-never…"

"Because you being gay changes nothing," Sven said firmly. "But sleeping around with your best friend's crush is kind of a dick move Elsa."

With that, both boys turned around on their heels and left. At that precise moment, the bell rang.

My breaths were forced, struggling, and too deep. I became lightheaded. Noticing my hands were shaking made me terrified. My bodies wasn't responding, I wasn't in control.

_So much for physical fucking strength_, I thought.

Never had I been so weak, not even able to control my own body any longer. Stumbling down the empty hall, supporting myself against the lockers, I ran for the only safe place that came to mind. Fleeing down the stairs, I finally saw the bathroom door. Anna and I's secret meet, the bathroom in the basement, where the cleaning staff would barely step foot.

Bursting into the bathroom, I saw Anna leaning against the sinks. Her cheeks were puffy, eyes red. However, as much as I wanted to comfort her, I still couldn't make the air reach my lungs.

Anna said something, I didn't know what, I couldn't hear it over the pounding in my head, and the sound of my exaggerated breaths.

Unzipping my backpack, I turned it upside-down, letting all the contents roll out on the floor. Emptying the contents of my lunch bag as well, I placed the plastic bag on my mouth, breathing into it. When I fell to my knees, Anna rushed to my side. I looked at her with foggy eyes, her expression so worried, her eyes filled with tears. Her voice was drowned by the thoughts in my head._ You are worthless. No one wants you. If it wasn't because you couldn't breathe, Anna wouldn't still be here._

"No –" I choked out, in response to my brain. My face was wet from all the tears I didn't realize were falling.

_You have lost all your friends. No one wants you. No wonder why your mother left._

"Please –" I cried out breathlessly.

The sobs made it even harder to breathe.

I felt Anna's hands on me, her arms around me. She dragged me across the floor the best she could muster, and placed herself against the wall, separating her legs, making room for me to sit. She leaned me up against her, my back against her stomach and my head resting on her collarbone. A hand stroked my hair back, and came to a rest on my forehead, preventing me from bending over.

"Elsa! Elsa!" Finally, I heard her voice.

Her touch made me relax, and my breathing slowed. My chest hurt. My lungs burned. All the extra oxygen had left me woozy. She leaned her head forward to look at me. Her bangs tickled my face. I stared into the air. Her thumb was caressing my cheek now, the slightly bruised one.

Finally I put down the plastic bag with trembling hands. Then I placed a hand on my stomach and one on my chest. For a couple of minutes I focused on my breathing, concentrating on only making the hand on my stomach rise, and for the air to go deep. They were still forced, my breaths, but now they were somewhat in control. Anna kept caressing my cheek. I didn't want her to stop, the movement having a calming effect on me.

"Elsa, say something… please," Anna's voice cracked, and a sob escaped.

"I'm fine Anna…" I whispered still a bit out of breath. My body was still shaking, and I could hardly move at the moment. Anna grabbed one of my shaking hands, while she hugged me closer.

"You scared me for a second," she whispered. I could feel her breath by my ear.

I heard her sniffle. It broke my heart. _Look at what you have done to her_. Her arms tried to grasp me when I tore away, but I didn't want her to touch me, afraid to poison our relationship even more. As if my touch was toxic – as if _I_ was toxic.

I was still dizzy, and my body was trembling. I could see Anna wanted to comfort me, her hands aching to grab my shaky hands.

"What are you doing down here?" I asked, sounding colder than I intended. Anna only shrugged.

"It was the first place I could think of…" She sounded distant. It was quiet for a few seconds.

"Elsa, what are we gonna do?" Anna suddenly asked. I got to my feet, and walked to the sink. Then I leaned my hands on the edges, and looked at my messy complexion in the dusty mirror. My hands had a firm grip around the edge so I wouldn't go tumbling to the floor.

"Firstly," I started with a trembling voice, "you are going to stay away from me."

My words hung in the air. I could see Anna's reflection in the mirror. She looked horrorstruck. Her mouth opened, and she was getting up, but I interrupted her before she could object.

"Then I'm going to tell everyone that I was the one who initiated it. That it was all my idea, and that you wanted nothing to do with me…"

"What the hell are you talking about Elsa?" Anna stood behind me now. She wore her hair in her signature braids, no beanie for once.

Everything hurt. Everything inside of me hurt.

"We both know you have more at stake than I do. This way, you can go back to your friends, and pretend like nothing ever happened," I uttered dryly.

To my surprise, Anna smiled. Then she snaked her arms around me, and put her chin on my shoulder. As much as I wanted to push her away, I couldn't. She was too warm, too loveable, too gentle.

"Elsa, I'm not ashamed of you," she reached under my arm, to caress my cheek. "Yes, things are going to be different, and some people might be a pain in the ass, but I still love you. If people can't accept that, they aren't my real friends." Anna kissed my cheek, catching the tears that was trailing down it. "And if you ever say anything like that again, God so help me, I'll never have sex with you again," Anna smiled, but eyed me warily.

I tried to laugh, but the lump in my throat wouldn't let me. Instead, a heartfelt sob escaped, forceful enough to shake my shoulders. Anna raised her chin, and turned me around. She tried to unwrap my arms, which I had wrapped tightly around myself, but I wouldn't let her.  
>"Elsa…" Anna sighed, "…Elsa, don't do this. Don't shut me out. This isn't your fault."<p>

"Yes it is," I whispered.

"Oh really now?" Anna leaned against me, pushing me against the counter to the sinks. "So... you were the one who told the whole school?"

"Well, no, but…"

"Elsa, things will be fine. Everything will be okay. No one is hurt, _we_ are good – we still got some things to talk about though…"

I just shook my head. Anna looked at me with a puzzled look.

"Kristoff got hurt…I hurt my best friend. I lied to both of them, betrayed them…"

"Christ Elsa, you make it sound like you killed someone." Anna sighed heavily again.

I shrugged, looking down, fighting the urge to allow myself the pleasure of nuzzling my cheek further into Anna's touch. Anna insisted on untangling my arms. She placed my arms around her waist, where the lifelessly hung above her hips – my fingers still twitching from excess adrenaline. Then she took my face with both her hands, forcing me to look into those teal beautiful eyes of hers.

"Look, you didn't tell them because you were protecting me. Kristoff have been dwelling over his crush for _way _too long – I know because Nala told me. He never even talked to me until, like, three weeks ago! And honestly, he cannot be mad over something he never pursued. Kristoff is just hurt and upset because he finally realized he got no actual chance whatsoever, but he's gonna to come around. Trust me."

For some reason the tears wouldn't stop running from my eyes. Anna's words had made me feel better, however. She was right. Kristoff was whining over something he never had the guts to pursue. Anna wasn't interested, and probably never would be, and you can't force someone to love someone.

It still didn't defend my lying and the broken trust between us. But things were going to be OK. No one was dead, no one was hurt, Anna was still mine, and I was still hers. Perhaps a broken heart, and an angry mob of friends on Anna's behalf was the outcome of this, but nothing more.

"You're a good person Elsa, if only you could see how wonderful you are, and stop doubting yourself so much. You feel everything so deeply… too deeply maybe. This doesn't have to be a big thing. I'm sure it's much bigger in your head, than it is in reality. You worry so much. Elsa, you cannot please everyone. Some things you just have to let go."

I nodded, letting her words soothe me. After a solid minute, I leaned my forehead onto hers. Anna smiled, and kissed me once on the lips. I was exhausted.

"Did you put ice on it when you got home?" Anna asked, running her thumb over my cheek. I shook my head, letting my eyes drop to her lips, really wanting to kiss her again.

"Idiot," she mumbled, pulling me closer for another kiss. "My idiot," she laughed under my lips.

After a few more kisses, we parted. I suggested whether we should get to class. Anna proposed that we could wait until next period. She explained she had no desire to go back to her classroom at that very moment. Surprisingly, it hadn't been Nala who had confronted Anna about our relationship, but an infuriating comment from Hans. When the rest of the clique had joined in, Anna had bolded from the classroom.

The bell rang, and we parted outside the bathroom door after agreeing we would sit together at lunch. I went to my locker to grab some books, trying to overhear the indiscreet whispers and comments from the other students as I walked by. Alice and Aurora was walking towards me, clearly not intending to move. Alice's shoulder bumped into me hard enough to almost make me stumble.

"Whoops, sorry, didn't see you there," she laughed, while Aurora stifled a giggle. I sighed, dearly wishing Anna was there, or even Kristoff…or Sven. The tardy bell rang, and I opened my locker, seeing Spiderman in the corner.

"Back to square one, huh Spidey?"

* * *

><p>I decided to meet Anna outside her classroom after second period. God knows what Nala and her crew would say to her, and I didn't want her to be alone. We were in this mess together. Being a supportive girlfriend was the least I could do.<p>

Anna came out of the door as one of the last ones. She was wearing her black tank today, the one showing just the right amount of cleavage. _Not today Elsa, you perve._

To my surprise, Anna grabbed my hand as soon as she saw me. We walked down the hallway with intertwined fingers. At one point, I thought a poor girl's eyes were going to roll out of their sockets. It almost made me laugh. _Screw 'em._

Anna looked over at me, seeing me smiling made her smile as well.

"Well, well, well, there we have dyke 1 and 2! Tell me, how's everything going on the rainbow?" I heard Nala utter. _Well, you can't have a rainbow without a little rain_, I thought, doing my best to ignore her.

"Just leave us alone," Anna said firmly.

Nala was standing with her group, leaning proudly up against Simon. Hans send me a threatening glare. Rapunzel stood behind Nala, her brows knitted together, looking quite unnerved. We kept walking, but Nala continued her heckling rant.

"Damn Anna, since when did you turn into such a cold-hearted bitch – I'm loving it!" Nala cut us off, making it impossible for us to continue walking without walking through her.

"Nala, fuck off please." Anna's voice was cold and dismissive.

A circle of people, a human wall, seemed to gather around us making it impossible for us to retrieve. Anna and Nala now stood face-to-face, Anna's hand still holding a firm clutch around mine.

I saw Sven and Kristoff among the mob. Kristoff was frowning, and was exchanging evil glares with Simon and Hans. Nala just laughed, getting reassuring back-up giggles from her crew. Rapunzel however, did not seem to enjoy seeing her cousin being taunted.

"Honestly, I don't understand why you would settle for such an incompetent loser such as Elsa! I mean, seriously, there are plenty of hot girls at school that I'd happily introduce you to!"

It stroke me that Nala wasn't bullying Anna because she was gay. What seemed to bother the ash-blonde was that Anna was with _me_.

"Shut. Your. Fucking. Mouth. Nala." Anna enunciated clearly.

An evil grin curled onto Nala's lips. She was enjoying herself, immensely. The hand that I was currently holding was no longer out of affection, but rather to hold Anna back from getting in Nala's face.

"What's the matter? Embarrassed that I'm calling you out on your low standards?" Nala snarled.

Before Anna could tear loose from my grip, and jump the girl, I stepped in between them.

"Don't you _dare_ talking shit about my girlfriend again, you stupid bitch!" Anna yelled from behind me.

I'd never seen her lose her temper like this. She was… defending me. Everything that I had wanted Anna to do, stand up and defend me, was happening. So why did it feel so wrong?

"Nala, we don't want any trouble…," my voice was weak, and I sounded like a scared child standing up to the school bully who had been stealing my lunch money.

"You know, you should really learn to know your place," she growled at me.

Her nose was only a few centimeters from mine. You could see the look of pure disgust on her face. That's when I received the first shove, which was quickly followed by another. The second one send me stumbling backwards into Anna. Before I could stop her, Anna had stepped around me, and shoved Nala into the lockers.

People started rooting and cheering as I saw Nala plant a nasty punch right on Anna's mouth. Her lip tore open, and blood trailed down her chin. People were yelling, horny guys were wolfs whistling, desperate to get a closer look at the cat fight. _Why is no one doing anything?! _

It struck me, that I as well, had taken the role as a passive bystander. Both girls had blood dripping down their faces from a newly slit gash. Nala pulled on Anna's shirt, making it ride up, revealing her stomach, as Nala jostled her to the floor. Luckily, Rapunzel bolted forward, and tried to get Nala off of Anna. I followed her lead, tearing Anna away from the ash-blonde lunatic that was currently straddling her.

All at once, people started to disperse. I looked up, and therefore missed the elbow that collided with my face at that exact moment. For a moment, I thought my nose was broken, but the missing sound of a _crack_ comforted me.

"Break it up! I said break it up you two!" Mr. Hawkins voice was loud and manic.

I held Anna by the arms now, pulling her off the floor. Rapunzel was struggling to hold Nala back, but Kristoff soon aided to assist. Anna were drawing quick angry breaths of air. Fearing the redhead might pass out or something worse, I clenched her securely against my body.

"You!" Mr. Hawkins pointed towards Nala, "and you!" then at Anna, "principal's office, now!"

I didn't want to let go of Anna, even though she was trying to break my grip. Sven was at my side now, tugging my arms calmly, telling me to let go. I watched as Nala and Anna walked down the hallway on each side of Mr. Hawkins.

As they turned the corner, I realized Sven had his arms wrapped around me, preventing me from sprinting after the redhead. My redhead. Kristoff was in front of me now, one hand on my cheek to hold my head still, and the other planting a feather-light touch on the tip of my nose. I flinched, the soreness of it still fresh from the blow.

"Do you think we should get her to the nurse?" Kristoff spoke, as if I wasn't there.

"Nah, she's isn't bleeding and it's not broken. Besides, the nurse have her hands full with those two," Rapunzel replied, as she also was inspecting my nose.

"Elsa, are you alright?" Rapunzel then asked, looking me deep in the eye. It was the first time they had engaged me in the conversation since Anna left. I nodded.

"Maybe we should get you out of here," Sven suggested.

Both Kristoff and Rapunzel nodded in agreement. Kristoff grabbed my bag, while Rapunzel took Anna's. Together we all walked to Sven's car. Kristoff sat in the front with Sven, while Rapunzel and I stacked in the back.

An overwhelming feeling of exhaustion made me drowsy, and without recognizing it, my head had slumped down to rest on Rapunzel's shoulder. My emotional quota had expired, leaving my body completely worn out.

The brunette didn't seem to mind though, and wrapped and arm around my shoulder to make me more comfortable. There were some loud chatter going on in the car, nothing that I took particularly notice of, but the three of them seemed to enjoy each other's company. At least that's what I gathered from all the snickering.

We finally reached my apartment complex, and all I wanted to do was go up and bury myself in my bed, and call Anna.

Kristoff stepped out of the car with me, saying he would follow me to my door.

"I'll pick you up tomorrow," Sven called out the window, since my car was still at school. I waved lazily at Rapunzel, barely able to keep my eyes open anymore. Kristoff practically had to carry me to the elevator. It was silent until we reached my front door. We stood awkwardly in front of each other. I took a deep breath.

"Kristoff, I'm so sorry, I've been a terrible friend to you."

"Yeah. You have," Kristoff replied. Then he threw his hand up in defeat, and one came back to scratch the back of his head.

"Look maybe I overreacted…" he started, obviously slightly embarrassed. "I see how much you care for her. I didn't know it was that serious between the two of you… but I saw the look on your face after the fight, and I saw how much you really care for her. And honestly, I wasn't getting anywhere with her. Heck, I hardly even know her…," his brown eyes observed me. Kristoff was a true friend. "And since I was the one to tell the whole school, I guess would can break it even."

I nodded, taking in his words.

"Sven was only upset because he's had a crush on you since day one. He has always hated my feelings towards Anna, thinking I was being ridiculous."

Everything seemed to fall into place all at once. Though it struck me that Sven had feelings for me. We were buddies, and I couldn't see him in any other way than a friend or a brother. I was amazed that he had restrained himself when I practically threw myself at him that night we kissed. He saw how upset I was, and refused to take advantage. Sven was a special and amazing guy, and he deserved more than what I had given him.

Another couple of awkward seconds passed, before Kristoff scooped me up in a bear hug that could have crushed my ribs. We both smiled as he let me go, and my feet touched the ground again. I pulled out my keys, and started unlocking the door.

"So, you know Merida, right?" Kristoff spoke before I vanished into my apartment.

"Yeah?" I quirked and eyebrow at him. His cheeks were getting rosy.

"You think you can introduce me?"

"Why, that didn't take you long," I punched him playfully in the chest, smiling widely at my large friend.

"Figured it was time to move on," he snickered.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Hey guys, couldn't just leave ya hanging – hope you enjoyed it. (If you hadn't noticed, I kinda fancy Spiderman). Until next time!


	22. Spaghetti Stains

**Chapter 22 – Spaghetti stains**

**Elsa** [21:01]: _when can i see u?_

**Anna** [21:01]: _soon, i promise :)_

**Elsa** [21:02]: _how soon?_

**Anna** [21:05]: _when things calm down a bit. My mom is still processing…_

**Elsa** [21:05]: c_an i come by with your homework tomorrow?_

**Anna **[21:06]: _yeah, i don't think she would mind that :)_

**Anna **[21:08]: _i miss u…_

I sighed once.

_God, I miss you too._

It was almost pathetic actually. Anna and I had only been apart for five days so far. The trouble with Nala had caused her a week of suspension. Luckily, she persuaded the principal not to put it on her permanent record, since she wasn't the who originally initiated the fight, and Nala had shoved me first. Anna did however receive a whole week of suspension, a cracked lip, and some detention to go with that.

In addition, the office had called her mother to come pick her up. This had been hard on Anna since she had always sworn that she would never cause any trouble that would involve her grieving mother. She didn't want her mom to worry. And when Mrs. Anderson suddenly gets a call from the school, saying her daughter had been in a fist-fight with another girl, Anna had broken that promise to herself. She had treated her mother as if she was a fragile glass sculpture the past two years. With the same cautionary behavior one would exhibit when daring to eat spaghetti wearing a white shirt. Anna had now stained the shirt, and was doing damage control. Her mother hadn't exactly grounded her, but had advised her to stay home and make up for the lost school hours.

**Elsa **[21:10]: _I miss u too 3_

School seemed empty without Anna's happy face to adore at inappropriate times. Well, they wouldn't be as inappropriate now that people knew we were together. Things with Kristoff and Sven were back to normal, and even better so. There was no awkward tension between us, even though the boys kept asking preposterously unsuitable questions about me and Anna's relationship. Surprisingly no lesbian stereotypical questions, such as 'who was the guy in your relationship' or 'if they could watch.' The boys were rather respective of the gay aspect of it all, but were just genuinely curious on the basic relationship stuff.

Luckily for me, we had a new addition to our table. Rapunzel had decided to join us, being fed up with Nala's aggressive outbursts and the constant bitching. It was nice having a girl by my side – a girl who wasn't Anna, and I had no romantic feelings towards.

Kristoff and I had agreed to leave out the fact that he had told me about Sven and his crush. I figured it was for the best. I didn't want to humiliate the boy by an awkward rejection, and thought I'd just slowly let it die out. Besides, Rapunzel seemed to be rather fond of Sven. She was sneaking glances once in a while, and 'accidently' touching his arm when she sat down next to him.

Kristoff and I were best buds once again. During basketball practice, I had put in a good word for him with Merida, slowly warming up to the big leap – the introduction. I wasn't a match-maker, but I could definitely see potential in the little feisty redhead. She was much like Anna in a sense, and would with no doubt be a challenge for the stubborn massive blond.

The Royals had left us alone, but we expected the worst upon the return of their queen. At the moment, we were just enjoying the peacefulness of the cafeteria – as much as I could enjoy it without Anna at least.

When the final bell rang I headed for my car, for once not car-pooling with the trio for the first time that week.

"Will we see you later?" Sven asked. I titled my head and made a questioning face.

"We're all going to Kristoff's place, come with us," Rapunzel begged. Rapunzel looped her arm through Sven's who didn't seem to object.

"I'll be over after I visit Anna," I announced. The brunette bounced happily on the balls of her feet, dragging Sven with her towards his car.

"Her mom finally letting her out?" Kristoff stood by my side now, his face in a frown.

"Not exactly," I answered, "I figured delivering her homework would be a valid excuse to see her. If so, at least just for a minute or two…"

Kristoff nodded, his blond locks swaying as he did. He planted his gigantic paw on my shoulder, squeezing it lightly.

"Well, you know where to find us," he smiled encouraging. Then he headed for the car, but turned around in time before he closed the door.

"Oh! Could you pick up some–"

"Oreos! Got it!" I yelled back, while entering my own car. _Those damn hustlers_…

* * *

><p>Sven's car was already parked in Kristoff's driveway when I arrived at Anna's house. I had stopped to put on gas, and picked up some Oreos at the gas station. The cookies neatly tucked away in the pocket of my jacket, I curled my hand into a fist and knocked twice on the door.<p>

Footsteps followed swiftly after the knocks. The door swung open, and a brooding Mrs. Anderson stepped outside, and closed the door behind her. I had to stumble a step back to make room for the woman. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and mouth pressed into a thin line. I swallowed hard.

"Elsa," the woman greeted.

"H-hello Mrs. Anderson," I replied as politely as I could. She stood for a little while, swaying a tiny bit, as if she was restless.

Without any warning she untangled her arms, and swung them around me, pulling me in for a tight hug. I stood frozen, unable to move, unsure of what to do. The hug was very motherly, very loving, as she started stroking my hair. My stiff arms carefully came around the woman, and I started hugging her back. After what felt like minutes she pulled back, holding me at an arm's length with a hand on each of my shoulders.

"Sorry, Anna told me you are a bit sensitive about people touching you," Mrs. Anderson said, as she discreetly let go of me with one hand to wipe a tear away from under her eye.

"N-no, its completely fine," I reassured her, even though the hug indeed had startled me a bit. The way she looked at me, I couldn't tell what she was thinking.

"Anna told me about you two," she then said, and I nearly choked on my own spit.

Was that what Anna had meant by 'she's still processing'? The only thing that had crossed my mind was the suspension and the fight. I thought she wouldn't burden her mother with such things? That she didn't want her white shirt covered in spaghetti stains?

"Don't worry honey, everything's fine. Anna was right, you think an awful lot," the woman snickered. I still stood in shock, trying to interpret the situation. What does one say in such situations? '_Well, yes Mrs. Anderson, I'm totally gay for your daughter so I guess you are my new mother-in-law now'_? Before I could think of something to verbalize, Mrs. Anderson sighed.

"She finally opened up to me," the woman spoke, her eyes swimming with tears of joy. "She told me everything. About you. About college. About her feelings and her struggles over the past two years. She just needed a push in the right direction, though I don't appreciate her fighting," she rose a warning finger at me.

"She's currently in her room doing homework. Anna needs to learn the consequences of fighting, even though I'm proud that she stuck up for you."

Overwhelmed by her kindness and approval, I stood flabbergasted, still partly in the woman's embrace. However, I managed to smile, and I could see on the woman's face that it warmed her heart.

"She must love you a lot," she said, her smile reaching her eyes. "She's lucky to have you Elsa, you should know that."

We were interrupted by a pair of footsteps from inside the house. The door opened hesitantly, making a creaking sound.

"What're you two doing out here?" Anna asked, "Mom, I told you Elsa was stopping by with some homework."

Mrs. Anderson took a step back, allowing me to see Anna's entire figure standing in the doorway. Her mouth curved up by the edges, her eyes sparkling. I felt my face grow warm, and the blush spread to my cheeks and all the way to my ears. Nervously I brushed my bangs back and corrected my braid. Anna stepped forward, clearly not embarrassed to pull me closer and embrace me in front of her mother. I had missed her smell, the way her warm hands contrasted with my cold ones, and her bangs that gently tickled my cheek when she hugged me.

A crackling noise sounded, and Anna pulled back, only to notice the oblong package of cookies in my pocket.

"What's with the cookies Elsa, sweet tooth much?" Anna giggled.

"Oh, they're not for me. They're for Sven," I mumbled, my cheeks still rosy.

Anna's mother was standing by the doorway, adoring us. The older woman was resting her hands under her chin, watching us with watery eyes as Anna placed a kiss on my cheek. By now, I was sure my face looked like a fire truck.

"I promised to meet them at Kristoff's place after I was done here; your cousin's there too… if you want to join…" I send a sheepish grin towards Mrs. Anderson. The older woman glanced at her wrist watch.

"Just be back before ten," she sighed in defeat. Anna squealed, and put on her shoes. "You're still on thin ice missy!" Her mother called after us.

"Yes, Ma'am!" Anna saluted, as she took my hand and started walking towards the street.

"And don't call me Ma'am," the woman exclaimed with a grin.

"Yes Sir!" The redhead waved her hand over her head, while locking our fingers together.

"Just go you two, before I change my mind," Mrs. Anderson laughed.

* * *

><p>The fear that the whole situation might be awkward stroked me. Honestly, I didn't think anyone would mind that I invited Anna. Kristoff had moved on, her cousin was there, and Anna was officially my girlfriend now.<p>

And it wasn't awkward. Not the slightest. Anna entered the room with her happy spirit, and was met with ecstatic greetings.

Rapunzel went to hug her immediately, while Sven uttered, "look who escaped! Tell me Anna, how was your time behind bars?" Anna merely laughed, and I threw the package of Oreos at him, receiving a satisfying 'ouch!'

Kristoff even joined in on the teasing while he placed a bottle of Coke and a basin of chips on the floor. Anna and I occupied the bed. The trio sat on the floor, deeply focused on the screen. They were watching a soccer game as the World Cup was currently happening. Sven and Kristoff cursed at the screen when some dude faked an injury – even Rapunzel roared loudly in frustration.

Anna and I were spooning on the bed, finally allowing me to be the big spoon for once. However, that didn't last long as she twisted her torso around so that she could kiss me. Her butt was still pressed against my lap. A hand came up and caressed my cheek.

"Listen Elsa, about your dad…," she whispered shyly.

"Can we talk about it later? I really just want to spend time with you," I asked gently. There was no need to get defensive, Anna was just worried. And she understood, giving me a slight nod in agreement.

"I really missed you," she mumbled.

I smiled, running my hand over her waist. My finger drew circular patterns onto her exposed skin where her jeans and shirt parted. Anna's lips were on mine again, her tongue daringly swiping over my lip, whereas I allowed her to enter. She caught my bottom lip between her teeth playfully. The hand that was once on my cheek now grabbed around my neck and pulled me closer, deepening the kiss.

"Ew you guys, get a room," Rapunzel said over her shoulder. Anna stopped kissing me and laughed loudly before nuzzling into the crook of my neck.

"Nah, it's cool, we don't mind," Kristoff laughed nudging Sven with his elbow.

"You guys are such perves," the brunette stated, before going back to her cheering.

Suddenly someone scored a goal, and the three literally jumped up in joy. They were all dancing, giving each other high fives. Sven and Kristoff started singing some made-up national anthem at the top of their lungs.

"Wow, you should've thought that they were completely wasted," Anna cooed, holding back a laugh. Kristoff let out a burb that could have scored a 9.0 on the Richter scale, before taking his seat on the madras on the floor.

"We're even more fun when we're drunk, isn't that right Elsa?" Sven asked, dropping down next to Rapunzel.

"If by 'fun' you mean absolutely insane, then yes. Then you're even more fun when you're drunk," I said while playing with Anna's fingers. Sven and Kristoff both huffed loudly, and turned around to face me and Anna.

"Ha!" Sven snorted. "Says the girl who had a full-on conversation with the remote last time she was wasted!"

I froze in my pose behind Anna and immediately stopped playing with her fingers. As I felt Anna's body shake from laughter, my cheeks turned bright red. My ears grew warm while the others howled with laughter. Rapunzel looked at my radiating red face, and settled a comforting hand on my arm.

"Don't worry Elsa," she laughed. "I once found Anna drunk in my garage playing air-guitar in her underwear. Gosh, you should've seen her, she was smeared in chocolate from head to toe!"

Anna was suddenly the one to become very very quiet, and her giggles died out. The boys just laughed even harder as Rapunzel continued. "Then she ran out into the garden with a towel wrapped around her neck like a cape, yelling she was 'the indestructible night fury'…at least until she passed out on the lawn."

"Shut up Rapunzel!" Anna yelped and got up to slap a hand over her cousin's mouth. My stomach hurt from all the laughing. "Don't you start!" Anna said and swatted a hand over my arm, but I was too engulfed with laughter.

"Aw Banana, you were so cute in your batman underwear," Rapunzel giggled, and wiped a tear from her eye that had escaped during her laughing fit.

"You let me lie out there until the sprinklers woke me…," the redhead grumbled, and leaned back on the bed with her arms crossed. I got up to reach her lips and planted a soft kiss on her mouth, trying to wipe that pout away from her face.

"I would've loved to see you in your batman underwear," I mumbled seductively in her ear, and for the second time she swatted me on the arm, though she was now wearing a wide grin.

As the clock stroke nine-thirty Anna tugged on my arm, pulling me up from the bed.

"Well, guys it's been fun, but I promised I'd be back by now," annoyed groans of protest sounded throughout the room.

"Anna, what're you…?" but before I could continue, the girl wafted dismissively with one hand.

"I know, I know," Anna said, "but on Monday I'll be a free woman." With that, we headed for the front door together. As soon as we were outside, I pulled Anna close to me.

"I thought your mom said you had until ten?" My voice was curious, but sad. Did she not have a good time? The redhead simply dragged me along into the night, wearing a rather mischievous grin. As she walked ahead of me, she turned around to look at me.

"Hmm, I wonder what we should do for thirty whole minutes," she hummed using a formal, but teasing tone. It sank in soon enough as Anna was headed for my car with jumpy strides, which I luckily had parked a few houses down, due to lack of free parking spots.

We stopped for a moment as I fiddled with the car keys. Anna ran her hands over my back, and hugged me from behind, planting a kiss behind my ear.

"I want you to come to Olaf's birthday party tomorrow…" she said after placing another kiss right below my earlobe. "…as my girlfriend," she added. I gulped once, suddenly nervous.

"A-are you sure you're ready for that?" I asked, uncertain whether it was actually me who was truly ready for that.

"Mhm," Anna hummed. "It would mean a lot to me if you came."

I turned around, facing the redhead. She grabbed hold of my hips, pulling me closer, making our stomachs collide.

"B-but what do I wear?" I didn't even try to hide the nervousness in my voice.

"Clothes preferably," the redhead giggled, kissing my jaw. "Although, I prefer to see you without any."

That last part had my cheek burn brightly, and I blushed heavily. Anna stifled a laugh.

"Relax babe, you can wear whatever you want, it's just a casual thing," she smiled at me, and my heart melted. I sighed, not being able to resist smiling back.

"So, you'll be there?" Anna asked with a small voice as she caressed my cheek. I nodded once.

"I'll be there."

Anna beamed with joy, and kissed me once on the lips. Then she grabbed the car keys from my hand and unlocked the door.

Anna wasted no time and pushed me into the back seat, where she immediately straddled me. We sat for a second, kissing gently.

It was horrifying the pull the girl had on me. It was as if she was gravity, and I would float away without her. She kept me down to earth, and prevented me from floating into the massive nothingness that was space. And for a minute, I didn't feel like nothing. With Anna, I was something. Then I realized I had been something all along, but Anna had just brought that something back to the surface. As if, I was drowning, and she swam to the bottom, pushing me to break the surface.  
>"I honestly don't know what I would do without you," I mumbled under her lips. Her mouth curled into a smile, as she simply deepened her kiss in response.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Hey lovely people, hope you enjoyed this chapter – sad to say it might be a little while with the next one (as I explained in my authors note in Ice Roses). I'm aiming for updating at least by the end of this month. (And yes, I wrote this during the World Cup).


	23. Birthday and Dinosaurs

**Chapter 23 – Birthday and Dinosaurs**

I rang the doorbell, butterflies fluttering chaotically in the pit of my stomach. Muffled laughter and music came from the other side of the front door. It wasn't hard to tell that the house was packed to its bursting point. The rain had left my hair damp, and suddenly I was thankful for deciding on a messy bun. I shook the tiny raindrops off of my umbrella as I waited for someone to answer the door.

_Please let this go smoothly…_I begged.

The door opened and there Mrs. Anderson stood, wearing a red apron over her slim dark blue dress. Her arms opened wide, gesturing an incoming hug. Mrs. Anderson caught me in a motherly embrace, and patted my cheek once before pulling away to announce something over her shoulder.

"Anna! Elsa's here," she called, as she pulled me inside. "Come in dear," the older woman said. She grabbed my umbrella, along with the wrapped present placed under my arm.

"I'll put this on the table for you. Olaf is so happy you came," Mrs. Anderson said, sending me a smile and a wink before disappearing into the living room to all the amused guests. Anna appeared from behind the corner as Mrs. Anderson left. The cut on her lip was only a vague dark red line. Admittedly, the soon-to-be scarring cut annoyed me. It annoyed me that Nala had put such mark on my girlfriend, such mocking and tormenting reminder that she had the upper hand.

The thoughts of contempt swiftly disappeared as Anna reached to kiss me hello. She was wearing tight jet-black jeans, and a white blouse supplied with a white cardigan. Her hair was set in a messy ponytail, where some of her auburn bangs dangled astray, framing her beautiful face brilliantly.

"Hey you," she said, grapping my coat and put it on the hanger.

"Hey Gorgeou-" I stopped midsentence as I felt a tiny figure collide with me. Olaf had swung his arms around my waist in a tight hug, his face digging into my stomach.

"Elsa, you made it!"

Anna giggled while trying to untangle her brother's arm from my waist. Her face was expressing an apologetic look, though she couldn't help but laugh. I kneeled down in front of the young boy, and rested a hand on his arm.

"Of course I made it. Who else is gonna play goalie when you open your birthday present?"

"No way!" Olaf yelped before sprinting into the living room to open his present. Anna and I both giggled at the excited birthday boy.

"What'd you get him?" The redhead asked with a raised eyebrow. I sighed happily seeing as the present made the boy light up with excitement. I leaned into Anna, which made the redhead snake an arm around my waist.

"A soccer ball," I said happily.

"Oh, Elsa you shouldn't have," Anna uttered in a mature voice.

"It's nothing. Really," I assured her, giving her a peck on the cheek. _Well, it only took you all morning to find the perfect present, and a near-mental breakdown about meeting Anna's family._

The thought of Anna's family made me wish I hadn't just kissed the redhead's cheek. Did they know about us? Of course they knew about us, Anna said I was here as her girlfriend. _Just relax Elsa, Anna is here._ With that thought, I grabbed one of Anna's hands, refusing to let it go.

"So, um, about my family. I don't wanna scare you, they can be a little… inappropriate…and loud. Like, really loud. But you know, they're fine, they mean well, I mean-" I put a hand on her cheek, turning her head to meet my gaze, before she could ramble on.

"Anna, they sound great," I assured her as we entered the living room.

All eyes were on us. Everyone was smiling, greeting us as we walked through the room. Anna introduced me to her Uncle Oaken.

"Oh Anna dear, she's lovely! You sure know how to pick 'em!" The man exclaimed. He nudged Anna's side with an elbow that nearly knocked all the wind out of her. _Gosh, and I thought Kristoff was big…_ I thought as I looked at the giant man. Anna laughed as she rubbed her ribs, clenching my hand a bit tighter.

We sat down at a table, surrounded by Anna's many relatives. They were all kind and welcoming, and as Anna had expressed. Loud. Like incredibly loud. We are talking, putting-my-eardrums-to-a-test-loud.

"Who's hungry?!" Mrs. Anderson called out, as she exited the kitchen with a massive dinosaur cake. People cheered around us, raising their glasses and clapping as Olaf blew out his birthday candles. It was nice. Being there with Anna, being accepted by her family. I couldn't have asked for more.

Anna was so relaxed, not the slightest bit of worry on her face. She was proud of presenting me. I could sense it in the way she kept pulling an arm around me, caressing my shoulder without even thinking about it. I held kissing to a minimum though, no matter how much I enjoyed the company, there was no way I could ever feel comfortable kissing Anna in front of her family.

Anna was in heated debate with Rapunzel, who also was present, still arguing over the batman-underwear-incident which had slipped Rapunzel's lips last night. Apparently, Anna felt that she had the right to reveal one of Rapunzel's drunken stories to Sven, to be even. An eye for an eye sort of thing. I didn't pay much attention to be honest because I suddenly felt a couple of judgmental eyes resting upon my figure.

I turned my head, finally acknowledging the intense stare I was receiving from the girl by the end of the table. She was around my age. She had very very light blonde hair, which was held together in a ponytail by a much too pink ribbon. The girl was dressed in white from head to toe, beside the pink belt around her waist. Her figure was so delicate and petite, the way her slender fingers wrapped around the glass. Her gaze didn't break as she took a sip.

"Um, Anna," I mumbled with a low voice, leaning closer towards her ear. Anna turned her head, and the blonde haired girl turned hers away immediately as Anna did.

"Oh, that's my cousin Marie. Just ignore her," Anna mumbled, her tone of voice suddenly sounding bitter. Easier said than done, because as the words had left the redheads mouth, Marie got up and walked the few steps to the chair across from us.

"Hey Anna Banana," the girl said as she effortlessly sat down crossing one leg over the other. She barely acknowledged me and Rapunzel's presence. Not that I'd say I minded, the girl, for some reason, gave me the creeps. Something about her just let off a bad vibe.

"Hi Marie," Anna said stiffly. Marie tilted her head, glancing quickly towards me, then back at Anna.

"So when did you decide to go gay Banana?"

Anna's hand tightened around mine, and from the corner of my eye, I could see she was gritting her teeth. _Relax Sweetheart_, I thought as my thumb caressed her hand.

"You don't just turn gay Marie. It's not exactly a choice," Anna said in a surprisingly reasonable manner. I looked over at Rapunzel, trying to find comfort in her eyes. She rolled her eyes at her rude cousin. I swallowed hard, begging for Marie not to continue. Though, my begging was in vain.

The blonde huffed loudly, a sign of superiority on her behalf. The sound send a blast of anger through me, simply clarifying how ignorant this girl truly was.

"You can't even tell you guys are gay, you look so normal. Banana, you could've told me, we could've gone to a dyke bar or something," the girl laughed.

It was quiet for a moment. Anna's jaw was clenched tightly, and I feared I might hear the crunching sound of teeth cracking. The redhead's hand, the one which rested upon her knee, curled into a fist.

"I'm just curious, but are you really satisfied by being with girls? Sexually of course, I mean, do they fulfill your needs? You have been with a guy right?" Marie popped an elbow up on the table, and rested her cheek in her palm, looking at Anna expectantly. Before I knew it, Anna had hunched forward in her seat, barely able to suppress a growl.

"What the hell Marie, that question is hardly appropriate! Would you ask me that if I was straight? What makes you think just because I'm gay that it gives you the right to pry into my sex-life?!"

"Woah, easy there Ms. Sensitive, yeesh, just asking a question," Marie rolled her eyes, nearly causing Anna to launch herself across the table and slap her. However, the girl was mature enough to just walk away, pulling me along with her. As we exited the living room, Rapunzel's voice sounded faintly. I could hardly make out her voice in the crowd of laughter and small-talk, but I thought heard her say, "you can be a real bitch sometimes, ya know that?"

Anna dragged us to her room, she took a deep breath while closing the door firmly behind us. Her eyes were closed, trying to get her temper under control. My palms ran down her arms, collecting her hands, and pulled them towards my chest. Anna was forced to step closer, giving me the opportunity to rest my forehead against hers. The girl's body slowly became relaxed, breathing through her nose, and out her mouth. When she finally opened her eyes, I felt the sense of relief rush over me.

"Are you okay?"

Anna exhaled one last time, blinking a few times, before fixating on me. Then she nodded. Her hands slid from my chest and down my sides to rest on my hips. My hands remained over Anna's heart, feeling the pace as every beat made her heart thump against my palm.

"That's just pretty much Marie in a nutshell. I'm sorry I got so angry…" Anna apologized.

"You're allowed to get angry," I told her. "I mean…I would've been angry too… what's her deal anyway?" My voice was low. Anna thought for a while, considering a best possible answer.

"She's just very insensitive. The first thing she asked after my dad died was if we'd get any sort of compensation from the government." My eyebrows knitted together as the words left her mouth. "We've never been very close, not like Rapunzel and I. Her obnoxious personality probably being the reason for that…" Anna's voice was bitter.

My arms came around her neck, pulling her in for a hug. I buried my face in her shoulder.  
>"I'm sorry I pulled you out like that. My family loves you, you know? Maybe a bit too much…"<p>

I laughed, nuzzling even closer to her if that was possible.

"It's alright…I don't mind some alone-time," I admitted. Being with Anna's family was lovely, but drained me, the constant nervousness leaving me tired. I sighed into her shoulder.

"Mh, me neither," Anna agreed, planting a kiss on my neck. We stood for a moment. Anna was swaying us a bit from side to side in a silent dance. Our feet barely left the ground as she rocked me.

"I have something for you actually…" I whispered. Anna pulled back, catching my eyes.

"For me?" She asked in disbelief.

Merely nodding as I released the girl from my arms (much to my displeasure) and went to dig through my bag. Anna sat down by the foot of the bed, waiting in anticipation. Finally, after what seemed like years of digging, I pulled out the book. I hadn't wrapped it. Somehow, it seemed less official if I didn't. I knew Anna would never agree to me giving her a present, unless it was her birthday, or maybe Christmas. Perhaps, not even then. And yet she walks around and gives me professional drawing books out of the blue. That girl would forever remain a mystery to me.

I walked the few steps towards the bed where Anna sat, closing the distance between us. Shyly, I handed her the small stack of paper. I already imagined where she would put it. I was hoping right next to the H.C. Andersen fairytales.

"I ordered the English version over Amazon… I wanted to give it to you earlier, but it only arrived yesterday."

Anna sat in silence for a little while weighing the book with the title "The Brothers Lionheart" written in large red letters on the cover. The cover contained an image of two brother sitting on a bridge, fishing in the river.

"Elsa… I don't know what to say…" Anna whispered, her words sounding heartfelt. "Thank you."

Then she leaned over and kissed me on the mouth before returning her gaze to the book to study it carefully. Before I knew it, she maneuvered herself across the bed to sit against the wall. I followed suit, and rested my head on Anna's chest. She draped an arm around me and opened the book with both hands. I could hear her heart beating loud and clearly. I could hear Anna's voice hum in her chest as she started reading.

"_Now I'm going to tell you about my brother. My brother, Jonathan Lionheart, is the person I want to tell you about. I think it's almost like a saga, and just a little like a ghost story…"_ her voice was angelic as she read to me. I felt a single tear in the corner of my eye as Anna kept reading. I'd almost forgotten how much I loved being read to. For a second, I was back with my mother. For a moment, it was her chest I was resting on.

Anna read the first couple of chapters, changing her voice according to the characters. I loved her portray of the brother, Jonathan. She was using her own voice for him. Anna reminded me of Jonathan in a sense. The same selflessness and bravery.  
>"Are you still with me?" Anna whispered, fearing I might have fallen asleep.<p>

"Yes, I could listen to you all day…" I mumbled happily into her chest. I heard Anna huff a breath of air out through her nose, before her mouth settled into a smile. She kept reading. I could hear in her voice she was enjoying the story as well. Maybe it would get a spot next to her favorite fairytales after all.

"Elsa….?" I hadn't realized Anna had stopped reading. The book laid face-down on her stomach, and she had an arm behind her head, while stroking my back up and down with the other.

"Yes?"

It was quiet for a little while. Anna had shifted into her serious mode; I could feel it on her body, though she was breathing calmly.

"The thing with your dad… has it ever happened before?"

Everything was still. Only the sound of Anna's heartbeat sounded in my ears. I shook my head lightly, without lifting it from her chest.

"No…" I mumbled. And it was the truth. "It was a mistake… he got carried away… but I'll never let it happen again. I swear to you."

I raised my head just enough to capture her eyes. I wanted to show her that I meant it. No one should ever get to lay hands on me like that ever again. But it _had_ been a mistake on his behalf. I didn't know much, but this I was positive of.

Our faces were close. Anna's nose was touching mine. The redhead looked worried though, but her hand never stopped rubbing my back delicately.

"It's just… seeing him hurting you. Elsa, I could've kicked his ass. If anything were to happen to you, I'd…I'd… I don't know what I'd do."

"I know, I'm sorry. I know it must have been hard for you to watch."

With that, I kissed her. There was nothing more to say on the matter. Things couldn't be undone. Anna kissed me back immediately, as a silent agreement that the conversation was over. I shifted my weight so I was laying half on top of the younger girl.

Anna's mouth broke into a smile under my lips. It was heavenly to feel her energetic spirit. She pulled me closer, practically crushing me down towards her. I felt a hand slide over my rear, squeezing ever so slightly, but carefully sliding back up again. It was a family birthday after all. Dreamily I pulled away to kiss her cheek. Then her jaw. And her ear. Her shoulder immediately shot up as I nibbled on her earlobe. I giggled as she rubbed a hand over her ticklish ear.

"You know I hate that," she pouted, though she couldn't suppress the smile for long.

"I'm sorry," I laughed, "it was just too tempting."

Anna popped on her elbows and was suddenly sitting up straight. She grabbed my hips, and pulled me unto her lap until I was straddling her.

"Well, maybe I need to find your weak-spot," she mumbled as she nibbled on my neck. I let out a shuttering breath. Gosh her lips felt so good against my skin.

"Can't find something that doesn't exist," I breathed, trying to ignore the heat spreading in my abdomen.

"We'll see about that," Anna said seductively. She trailed kisses all the way from my chin to the sensitive skin between my breasts. I leaned my head back. My mind was foggy, especially as she took a firmer grip around my hips and pulled me closer to her. She really did do a good job on pushing my core as close to hers as possible.

_Mmh, that belt-buckle feels good…_

My breath hitched, and I turned my head down to look at my girlfriend. Our faces were both heavily flushed. I planted another kiss on her lips, but didn't dare to deepen it.

Without warning, the door was kicked open, and in flew Olaf with a smile so big I thought his cheeks were going to burst.

"Elsa! Elsa! It stopped raining, let's go outside and play!"

I blushed heavily, but the boy hadn't even seemed to notice the position in which he had caught me and his sister in. Instead, he just grabbed my hand and pulled me outside. I dragged Anna along, and we walked through the house like a human chain, Olaf in the lead.

All the guests watched us as we played in the garden. Of course I let Olaf win, being his birthday and all. Additionally, Anna's entire family were watching, how could I not let the boy win?

We played until darkness fell upon us and it was too dark to see the ball. We were all covered in mud, the rain having made the grass soggy. Anna had slipped in the muddy grass, and both Olaf and I had laughed. I went to help her up, but that's when she dragged me down with her. Suddenly, we were wrestling in the mud, until we awkwardly ended on top of each other, and Anna shot me a kiss before helping me up. You could almost hear Anna's entire family going 'aaaww' inside the house. Still, I couldn't help but blush.

Our nice clothes were ruined, but I didn't care. Anna and I washed up with the garden hose, and Mrs. Anderson came out and wrapped us in clean towels. She rubbed my arms, trying to heat me up before pulling me in close for a hug.

"Why don't you girls go get changed? Coffee and tea will be ready soon."

Anna took my hand, and led me to her room. As always, she wasn't the least bit shy, and started stripping down to her underwear. I couldn't help but watch, just standing in my towel and wet clothes. Anna dug into her closet, and pulled out some fresh jeans and a t-shirt and threw at me.

"These will fit you," she said with a grin. She'd noticed me staring.

At once, Anna took two long strides towards me, untangling the towel from my embrace. It dropped to the floor. Then she grabbed the bottom of sweater, and pulled it over my head in one fluent sexy motion. Now we both stood in our bras, and Anna in her panties. The younger girl bit her bottom lip. Then she stepped even closer making our stomach's collide, and fiddled with the zipper on my skirt. It fell from my waist and pooled around my feet on the floor. Anna's body was cold when she hugged me closer, she had Goosebumps covering every inch of her skin. I started kissing her freckled shoulders, and Anna made tiny noises of pleasure.

"I love your freckles," I mumbled as I pulled back and gave her a kiss on the nose.

"I love your everything," she replied quickly and caught my lips with hers. The knock on the door drew us back to reality, and Anna's mother sounded on the other door.

"Tea and coffee served, don't make me come in there!" Mrs. Anderson exclaimed teasingly.

"Guess we better put some clothes on," Anna laughed.

"No, actually, I thought I would walk out like this," I tried striking a sexy pose, but failed miserably. Anna just laughed, and pulled on her pants.

_When did I get this lucky?_

* * *

><p>I came home with the goofiest grin on my lips, realizing I was completely love-struck. Nevertheless, I didn't care. This was the happiest I'd ever been. It was nearly too good to be true.<p>

I found my dad sitting with his laptop in the living room. He had smacked his feet up on the sofa table, where a glass of red wine neatly stood by the edge.

"Hey dad," I said as I walked passed him (still smiling) to get to my room.

"You didn't leave a note," he stated without taking his eyes off the screen. _Hello to you too! _I had stopped leaving notes after the boxing incident figuring I was nineteen years old, and didn't need to tell my parents where I was every waking second.

"I have a phone. You could just have called or send me a text," I answered bluntly.

He didn't seem to care by my brusque tone. Instead, he hummed, pretending he at least had listened to half of what I'd been saying. Then he cleared his throat and pulled his feet off the table, reaching for a sip of his wine. After nipping at the bitter liquid, he actually turned his head to look at me.  
>"Speaking of phones, I just got off the phone with Mr. DeHeart," he said.<p>

My blood ran cold, fearing he was about to say what I thought he was going to say.

"He's relocating us. I got an opening slot in the Scandinavian section again now that they introduced the new Boeing models."

And like that, my world was crumbling.


	24. DeHeart

**Chapter 24 – DeHeart**

Nothing seemed real anymore. Sitting by the lunch table with Anna holding my hand, everything seemed a bit pointless. Across from me sat Rapunzel and Sven, giggling together, completely oblivious about the fact that both of them had a thing for the other. According to Anna, her cousin had just recently broken up with her boyfriend. I figured I'd tell Sven when I had the chance, telling him to go for it. They did look cute together. Kristoff sat on my other side, trying to hold a conversation with Merida, who was arguing about the World Cup. Anna had taken Merida's side, and the two redheads were in heated debate with the poor blond. Merida had joined our table quite recently; in fact, it was Kristoff himself who asked her. As much as I wanted to be proud at the somewhat pompous large blond, my head was elsewhere.

"Hey, are you alright?" It was Anna who spoke. My eyes went wide. _She knows something's up._ I swallowed hard. _Well, you should have told her already you raging idiot!_

"You should eat something," she added, handing me my apple that was just standing mockingly on my food tray. It was impossible for me to consume anything. My stomach was filled with worry and hurt. There was room for no more, let alone food.

"Yeah, everything's fine."

_Elsa, you are, and will forever be, a horrible liar._

"You don't seem fine." All I could do was avoid her teal eyes, knowing she would be able to look right through if she got the chance.

"Your hands are all clammy, what's going on?" She persisted, taking my hand into both of hers. Anna's concerned gaze caught my eyes. She could see the panic in my eyes, and she now looked rather alarmed herself.

"Elsa you're scaring me," the table quickly became focused on Anna and me. I looked up, meeting the gazes of all my friends – all the friends that I soon had to leave – and nearly broke down in tears. Before I gave myself the chance to blubber like a pathetic fool, I pushed my chair back, and stormed out.

On my way out, I caught the sight of Nala. Her swollen black eye was difficult not to notice, and I couldn't help but stare. Even though the darkness of her bruised face was fading, it was still a dominating feature that was hard to avoid. She send me a poisonous smile. That girl had a magic ability to get under my skin, and send shivers crawling up my spine. I pushed open the door, and entered the hallway, supressing Nala's haunting expression.

I made it to my locker, where I fought bravely to keep the tears back. But when I felt a tap on my shoulder, I knew what was coming.

"Mind telling me what's having you look like someone just tried to kill you?" Anna stood with her arms folded over her chest, tapping her food impatiently. She looked annoyed, which I couldn't blame her for. She had good reasons to think I would hide something for her, I hadn't exactly proven her otherwise throughout the duration of our relationship. My eyes darted from object to object, refusing to meet Anna's gaze. Anna tilted her head, her impatience growing more obvious. Suddenly my throat tied itself into this tight knot, it nearly hurt. Frantically, I grabbed a bottle of water from my locker and chucked down a few heavy gulps, almost causing myself splatter the liquid everywhere from nearly chocking. A bit out of breath, I finally managed to say something.

"I don't think this is the best place…"

"Elsa, just tell me. This relationship won't work if you don't open up to me!"

I felt so small. So tiny, compared to the world. It was crushing me. The world was crushing me. I was at the bottom of the ocean again, having all the continents stacked up on top of me.

I felt a pull on my arm, and Anna was dragging me along. We entered the girl's bathroom. Belle was standing by the mirror, fixing her lipstick.

"Hey Elsa!" She greeted. She nodded politely towards Anna. "Anna…" she greeted.

"Do you mind giving us a minute?" Anna asked hastily, not caring for the perplexed expression Belle's face adapted.

"Of course," Belle said, a bit startled. Her concerned eyes trailing us up and down as she grabbed her books and clutched them tightly to her chest. The door closed behind her.

"Anna, this isn't the best place, people could easily…"

"Tell me Elsa. Now." Her face grew stern. There was no more hiding, I couldn't avoid it any longer. Now, what all that was left was a head-on confrontation, and perhaps two broken hearts.

"Anna," I took a deep breath. "Anna, I'm moving away."

Her face fell. She looked at me, suddenly eyes wide. The grip around herself grew tighter, I could see how the message had gone straight to her heart, as she was covering it up.

"What? W-where are you going?" She asked, stumbling over the words.

"I'm moving back to Norway."

"Wait, what?" Anna asked, finally taking in the words and their meaning. "What do you mean 'you're moving away,' you just got here!"

"Anna, it's already decided. My father got the news two days ago."

"Two days ago!? Why didn't you…!?" Anna let out a loud groan and pinched the bride of her nose, something she rarely did. She breathed deep through her nose, and let it slide. But then she looked at me with begging eyes.

"But Elsa you're 19, you don't have to go," tears started to swell in her eyes. The thundering sound of my heart-beat going ten thousand miles an hour threw me off course. Knowing I was the cause of every single tear that dripped down Anna's face, was enough to make me want to plunge through my own chest and rip out my adrenaline rushed heart. The pleading in her eyes didn't help. A look telling me not to go.

"You don't understand," I said frustrated as I walked back and forth.

"Then help me understand Elsa, because you're really not making any sense. You don't get along with your dad."

"It's complicated," I stated.

"No. _You_ are making it complicated!" Anna exclaimed.

_There's nothing complicated about it. I'm too big of a coward not to go with him. I'm too desperate for his approval. _

"Look Anna, the man is the only family I have. Everyone either doesn't want me, or are dead."

My eyes were burning from holding back the tears. The anger dwelling inside was only directed at myself. I needed to hit something, preferably a mirror, so I could at least pretend to hit myself in the face. Taking a sharp breath of air, really forcing the air down my lungs, I spoke again.

"Even with his lack of presence, my father has always been the only consistent thing in my life." My voice was merely a whisper by this point. Anna's voice, however, was not. I could tell the girl was restraining herself from yelling.

"Can't you see the relationship between you and your dad is completely draining you? I understand you're scared Elsa, you've always had a roof over your head with your dad, but I'll help you. I'll be right here," she walked towards me and took my hands in hers as she spoke. There was a deadening silence for a moment.

"No Anna," I whispered, as a tear rolled down my cheek. Another tear leaked from the corner of my eye.

"What are you saying?" Her voice cracked when she said it.

"I… I don't know," I said hesitantly.

"I think you do," Anna said before she headed for the door. I didn't stop her. I fell to my knees as the door slammed behind her.

* * *

><p>It didn't surprise me that the whole school knew about my departure by the end of the day. Sven and Kristoff had already approached me, both complaining to me how the whole situation was utter bullshit, and that I could always move in with them. We all knew it was only empty promises. However, I could see how they both were struggling, and had put their game-faces on. It was needless to say that it was their way of coping.<p>

Rapunzel and Merida came walking down the hallway towards us. Sven was leaning against the lockers, and Kristoff stood behind me, holding his backpack by one strap over his shoulder. The brown-haired boy was unusually quiet, and was hiding an awful lot behind his bangs, as he stood there.

"Oh Elsa, I just heard. I'm so sorry," Rapunzel said, not hesitating with a full-on bear hug. As she stood embracing me, I patted her awkwardly on the back, obviously too uncomfortable to hug the girl back. It was a nice gesture however, and I could feel that she meant every word of it. Merida fist bumped me, giving her apologies, before she walked over to stand next to Kristoff.

It's funny how we had become this large group – in fact, almost as big as the Royals. It was peculiar being surrounded by that many people, willing to call me their friend. _If only Anna was here,_ I thought.

"Screw Nala," Sven said out of the blue. His brown eyes had lit up with anger, as he brushed his hair away from his eyes.

"Yeah, fuck that bitch. I can't believe this," Rapunzel supplied. _What the heck are they talking about?_

"Whoa guys, I know we all hate her, but what has she got to do with anything?" All eyes were on me now. Their round orbs were wide with surprise, mouths gaping.

"What do you mean? She has everything to do with this!" Sven shot across the gap separating us to stand in front of me. He ran both his hands through his hair, throwing his head back a bit in disbelief.

"You really have no clue, do you?" He asked.

"About what?!" My pulse was speeding up. What was he so worked up about?

"How can nobody have told you!?" Sven was clearly too upset to tell me what was going on, so I turned to Kristoff. The blond stood flabbergasted for a moment, manically looking for assistance from the two girls next to him. Kristoff sighed deeply, making his chest pop out.

"The last name DeHeart doesn't ring a bell?" Kristoff declared.

"Of course, Mr. DeHeart, my dads bos–" I bet you could almost hear the gears turning in my head. Then realization struck me like lightning.

"Nala DeHeart!?" I exclaimed. _How could I never have known her last name!?_

"Wow, you really didn't know," Kristoff uttered in awe, "I figured that Anna would've told you."

It still didn't seem real. "Her father is Scar DeHeart…" I mumbled, and everybody nodded at my statement. Sven's words from the day we first met played in my head,_ "__her father is like this hot-shot in his industry – their family is pretty much considered royalty."_

"I'm sure daddy's girl pulled some strings in getting you transferred. I mean, come on! That little rat had a whole week of suspension to convince him!" Kristoff was getting angry and overprotective again.

I could see how the fight with Anna and the suspension could have been the last straw. And who knew, if she had such pull with her father that people said she did, I didn't see how she could have resisted. Admittedly, if I had that sort of power, I probably wouldn't have hesitated in getting Nala relocated either. Especially after getting Anna to turn on her like that. I knew it was Anna's choice, and she was tired of pretending to be something she was not, but either way, I still caused Nala a friend (or an evil descendant if you prefer).

Speaking of the devil, Nala was making her way down the hallway towards us with hasty strides. Simon was following her, trying to keep up with her urgent pace. He was using wild hand gestures, definitely expressing his displeasure towards something. His nagging voice sounded all the way down the hallway, however, they were too far away from us to hear the matters of the conversation. In a matter of steps, they were close enough to make out what they were saying.

"This is low, even for you Nala!" Simon spat. He placed a hand on her shoulder, indicating for her to stop her manic walk, but she merely brushed it off. Simon didn't seem to let it bother him, and continued his rant.

"Everyone knows that Elsa's dad works for your father, and don't tell me you had nothing to do with his transfer!" His words were harsh and threatening. Everyone seemed to listen to their conversation with half an ear, too intimidated by the two to actually line up and watch them fight. Simon now threw his hands up in frustration. Nala didn't seem to want to listen to him, as she barely made eye contact with him. She simply wore her stone-face, and looked at the lock to her locker as she punched in the digits. Her pale blue eyes followed her hand as she retrieved several books from her locker.

"I mean it's one thing to make her life miserable, but just because you're DeHeart's daughter doesn't mean you get to play god!" Simon continued relentlessly. Nala didn't do anything. She barely acknowledged his presence, and only stood there with her cold bitchy attitude.

"Go to hell Simon," Nala said coldly, and walked away from, swaying her hips exaggeratedly as if she knew everyone was watching. She looked me up and down as she passed, her lips pressed into a thin line. Sven swung an arm over my shoulder, shielding me with his broad shoulder. However, Nala did nothing. She didn't wink, she didn't send me a poisonous smile. Rapunzel fought to hold back a growl.

_Well, I be damned. She finally got me,_ I thought, realizing my defeat.

* * *

><p>I wanted to get to school early to see if I could catch Anna before we went to class. Of course Anna's inadequate punctuality shot large holes in my plan, and I didn't get an opportunity to speak with the redhead before the bell rang.<p>

The talk in the bathroom yesterday still had my head spinning. What did this mean? Were we over? My mind was like a crowded train station at the moment, too overpopulated by thoughts at inconvenient times. Anna's absence at our lunch table had me worried, leaving me ruminating about our entire relationship, whether I could have done anything to prevent this. And of course the answer was yes.

By the end of the day, I felt the insistent and continuous rush of panic devouring me. I needed to talk to Anna. Before it was too late.

The next day I decided to wait by her locker. She was avoiding me, I knew it. The thought about leaving her be and not pursue her, prowled my mind. However, I couldn't live with not knowing. The bell rang, and class had started. Anna still hadn't announced her presence, and I figured she was just late as usual. I stood leaning against her locker, tracing my finger over the cold metal. I jumped when I heard someone clear their throat behind me. Excitedly I turned around, expecting to see Anna's gentle features. However, I was startled to be met with the last person I ever expected to talk to.

"She's already in class," the ash-blonde spoke. "She saw you from down the hall and asked if she could borrow Eric's book."

Disappointment and hurt coursed through me, hearing the confirmation of Anna knowingly avoiding me. Nala had her hair in a ponytail, her pale blue eyes fixed on me.

"What do you want Nala? Come here to taunt me some more?" It was the first time I had really been able to speak with such strength in my voice. It caught Nala by surprise as well, and I was rewarded with a staggered expression for one or two seconds. Then she rolled her eyes, shaking off my new-found confidence.

"No."

I crossed my arms over my chest not to protect myself for once, but trying to look impatient, while giving her a harsh glare. Nala was clearly uncomfortable, seeming not to be able to find the right words – or any words at all.

"Then what do you want? I'm really not in the mood right now Nal–"

"Look Princess, I didn't get your dad transferred."

"Oh really now?" I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "What gives me any reason to believe you? You've hated me since I got here."

Nala looked around, refusing any sort of eye contact. She buried her hands deep in the pockets of her leather jacket, crossing one leg over the other while leaning on her weight on one foot.

"Elsa, you gotta believe me. Do you really think I have that sort of influence on my father's work? The man is hardly ever home, and he barely listens to me." At that moment, I realized Nala and I had more in common than previously I thought.

"Now everyone thinks its my fault because I'm the alfa-bitch, and people are too stupid to use common sense."

The faint familiarity of the hurt in her eyes was enough to convince me. Nala knew what it was like. She knew what it felt like not being a priority. That money could at times seem at more worth than you could. Trying to live up to standards that surely wasn't even there, but you tried anyway, because in the end, you wanted them to be there. To at least pretend that your parents were interested in seeing you making them proud. To at least pretend that your parents set boundaries and rules. Not having any rules to break could be just as big a problem as having too many rules. Maybe it wasn't exactly the same, but I liked to believe that it was.

"I believe you."

"Good… Thank you," Nala looked up for the first time, meeting my eyes. I still couldn't deny she was pretty, even though her horrible personality made her seem unattractive to me.

"I still hate your guts."

"Oh yeah, ditto," Nala laughed.

We shared a smile – a weird one of that, but I still counted it as a victory. Awkwardly, we parted ways, heading opposite directions.

"Oh, and Barbie," Nala called. "Go to the school concourse behind the fire-escape after third period."

I send her a questioning look.

"Trust me," she said and then she turned the corner.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Three more chapters to go guys, and then an epilogue.


	25. Goodbye

**Chapter 25 – Goodbye**

The bell rang after third period, and I headed for the schoolyard. As I turned the corner to reach the staircase to the fire escape, I smelled smoke. Behind the corner sat the person I was the most longing to see. A head of fiery red locks infiltrated my vision. Anna was sitting at the bottom of the staircase, a cigarette between her lips.

"You know," I said, and the girl looked up, "you really oughta quit that." I tried hiding behind a smile, which Anna did not return. I could see she didn't wish to speak to me. She took a long drag of her cigarette, heaving in the gases as if it was the last oxygen on earth.

"Can we talk?"

Anna shrugged, puffing on her cigarette. I sat down next to her, our shoulders rubbed against each other.

"You've been avoiding me…" I said, trying not to sound too hurt. The last thing I wanted to do was to drive the girl off because of guilt. The sizzling urge to rest my hand on her knee arose, but I fought it. Instead, I fiddled with my hands, trying to preoccupy them, as I always did. What I wouldn't have done to kiss her at that moment. Anna was usually so difficult to shut up and now that she wouldn't talk it made my insides go cold.

"Please look at me," I pleaded, missing the gentle eyes that I had woken up next to numerous mornings. Anna didn't turn her head. The cigarette between her fingers grew smaller. The smoke filled my nostrils with an unpleasant scent.

"Anna…" I tilted my head, trying to catch her eyes, "I'm truly sorry. About everything…"

The strawberry blonde took one last drag, before tossing the bud.

"Stop," Anna whispered.

My lips sealed shut. For the first time she looked at me.

"We shouldn't do this to ourselves Elsa. I'm done being your second choice. As much as I love you, I can't stop hating you right now."

She got up. _No, no, please don't leave…_

"Anna please, can we please, please, please talk about this?" I begged.

"What's there to talk about, really? You're leaving, and I'm staying where I've always been. Stuck in this town."

"Anna, please just listen. Talk to me."

"No," She said. "It hurts too much." She picked up her bag and tossed it over her shoulder before walking to the school.

"Goodbye Elsa," was all her voice could muster before cracking.

Now I knew what she must have felt that night when I left her in the cold after our first kiss. Only, this was surely a billion times worse. At that time, we didn't love each, we didn't know each other that well. Now, I simply felt like my better half had been ripped away from me, not unlike the way my parents had ripped me in half. This was different however. Maybe I wasn't meant to get the things I wanted. Maybe I was supposed to live an unhappy life in fear and neglect.

Maybe Anna and I weren't supposed to be together.

* * *

><p>It'd been a long day. Having my heart torn out wasn't exactly the ideal aspect of a perfect day. The only thing the day had brought was the confirmation of what I had dreaded the most.<p>

Anna and I were over.

I was leaving for good, and I probably had to redo my senior year somewhere else.

Days passed. Anna had gotten exceedingly good at avoiding me – not that I tried anymore. Her, Merida and Rapunzel now had a table of their own, while I sat with Kristoff and Sven. I didn't feel bad for separating them, I knew they would reunite as soon as I was gone.

Another excruciatingly painful day went by. I was determined to go home and pack the last of my belongings. My room was pretty much one big box by now. To my dread, but also my delight, Anna had left behind one of her baggy oversized sweatshirts. It was deep blue and plain, with no hoodie or zipper. It smelled like her, and I found myself wearing it excessively often. I didn't dare wash it by the fear that her scent might disappear.

As I stood in the elevator, I found myself sniff into the sleeve of Anna's sweater. The tears were trying to push their way through, but I quickly pulled away from the piece of clothing before letting them leak. I put my keys in the door, dreading the sadness that was to overcome me while packing the rest of my items. To my surprise, I found that it was already unlocked.

_Weird…Gerda doesn't work on Tuesdays._

I entered and found a slender tall woman standing in the kitchen. A complete stranger. She stood by the kitchen island. Her high heels looked uncomfortable.

The first thought that crossed my mind was that she was from real estate. The woman stood deeply lost in her phone, flicking her fingers across the screen. She was swiping the screen sideways with her pointer finger since her fake nails were too long for her to use her fingertips.

"Um, can I help you?" I asked warily.

The woman turned around. She had piercing dark eyes, which almost had an unnatural hue of purple, and wavy long brown hair. She was wearing a slim black low-cut dress, exposing her womanly curves. Her push-up bra was nearly at its bursting point. It almost made her boobs look like deformed balloons, desperately trying to fly away from their cage, the cage being her bra. The red lipstick made her lips look full and soft.

"You must be Elsa! It's so nice to finally meet you!"

Before I knew it, the woman was pulling me in for a tight hug. The embrace caught me by surprise. The hairs on my arms rose – something wasn't right – and I pushed her away so forcefully it nearly caused her to trip backwards.  
>"Who are you!?"<p>

The woman looked perplexed for a moment. I eyed the intruder harshly, knowing my emotions were on the verge of spilling over, on the edge to a complete mental breakdown.

"Why Sweetie, I'm your father's fiancé."

Her words hung in the air in front of me. There she stood, this stranger claiming to be my father's fiancé, looking at me expectantly. As if I was to cling myself to her and call her 'mommy.' I heard the door slam shut.

"Wonderful, I see you've met Vanessa," my father's voice sounded.

The man entered the living room, carrying a brown paper bag of groceries. Per usual my father didn't possess anything close to a smile, however, his eyes seemed to lit up by the slightest as he approached me and this so-called Vanessa.

As soon as he had put the bag down on the counter, he pulled the woman close and kissed her on the lips.

"Dad, what's going on? Who _is_ this?" I asked with a shrieking voice, noticing too late that I was pointing towards the woman as if she was some sort of animal at the zoo.

I took another glance at Vanessa – she was clearly too young for him. He turned towards me, never releasing the grip around Vanessa's waist.

"Honey, this is Vanessa," he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "my fiancé."

His words left me stunned. I had been introduced to my fair share of new girlfriends, but this one? This one took the prize.

When a smile quirked upon his lips, something inside of me tore. A major implosion of emotions happened within me. I was like a ticking bomb, ready to blow any minute now.

"Oh Elsa, your father is just wonderful! We met a few months ago at this hotel, in the lobby, and we simply fell in love at once!" Vanessa cooed happily, while she ran her hands over my father's strong chest, careful not to wrinkle his shirt.

The fact that she had added 'in the lobby' convinced me that she had been a one night stand - perhaps a regular - on one of my father's trips. It wouldn't surprise me if Vanessa was a stewardess, maybe even working for Arendelle Airlines. Then she leaned in close and nuzzled his nose with hers. I was about ready to hurl.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner sweetie, but I wasn't sure where this was going," my father said, his eyes stealing a quick glance at Vanessa's rack.

"What, so you guys have known each other for like two months?" I growled. _Has the whole world gone mad all at once?_

"A month and a half!" Vanessa squealed in delight.

Then she reached out her arm to me, showing off the massive diamond ring on her finger. The diamond was probably the size of an apple, and honestly, I couldn't apprehend how the woman still had strength to lift her arm.

"Dad," the gravity in my voice caught his attention. "Is this a joke?" I asked in all seriousness.

"No honey, why would I joke about such thing?"

I took a few steps back, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"What's wrong Elsa?" He asked, not looking at me, but looking at Vanessa who hand slung her arms around his neck.

"What's wrong?" I asked, trying to contain my voice. _Calm down Elsa, don't let your temper get to you…_"What's wrong is that you can't marry someone you just met!"…_well, crap_.

He sighed now, one of his _not this again Elsa_-sighs, as if this was a regular occurrence.

"I don't expect you to understand, but I need you to accept it," he said, "Vanessa is moving with us."

The threatening shakiness of my knees made me fear I might collapse to floor. The anger welled within, yet again confirming I was a ticking time bomb. The way she looked at him was sickening and made my lunch stir in my stomach.

I was convinced with all of my heart, that if this apartment caught fire and my father could only save one of us, he would save Vanessa. It was heart breaking to think of, but it was the truth.

"I'm not leaving," I said quietly.

My voice was as cold as ice. It made my father's eyebrows shoot to his hairline. I'd never spoken so determinedly at him.

"That's nonsense Elsa. We're leaving and you're coming with us," was his final dismissive words. I clenched my fists tightly, prepared to stand my ground.

"No. I'm not leaving. I'm staying right here," I said calmly, trying to withstand my mature posture.

My father finally untangled himself from Vanessa's embrace, and turned towards me. Seeing the frustration and disappointment in his eyes barely hurt. I was hurt beyond belief, and my body was deflecting any more.

"Where is all of this coming from Elsa? Why are you acting like this? This isn't you."

I snorted, the tremendous amount of hurt and his constant guilt-tripping not getting to me anymore.

"How would you know? You barely know me at all!"

"That's ridiculous. Of course I know my own daughter."

"You _think_ you know me!" I had to laugh aloud at his statement.

My father seemed to have frozen to the spot. Vanessa stood awkwardly, taking a small step behind him, and draped her arms around her figure. She was pathetic as she stood there. The fact that she actually thought that she could just waltz in here, claiming the spot as my new 'mommy,' thinking we could be this one big happy family disgusted me. She disgusted me. They both disgusted me.

"Okay! Well!" I started, letting my anger fuel me, "did you know I _hate_ basketball? Did you know that I despise boxing?"

_Elsa what are you doing? Stop before you say something stupid,_ was all my mind could think of.

But I didn't listen. This was 13 years of repressed thoughts and emotions that were spilling, and it couldn't be stopped. It was like trying to empty out a broken dam with a teacup before the barrier cracked.

"Did you know that I love art?"

My father's complexion began to fade. He was turning pale. I couldn't tell if he was angry or shocked by my outburst.

"Did you know that my grades are hanging on by a threat?!" The control of my anger was slipping through my fingers. I looked at him, completely ignoring Vanessa at this point. There he stood. The most flawed perfect man I'd ever seen.

_Three…two…one_, and the bomb exploded, taking everything with it.

"Did you know that I'm gay!?"

That statement send my father coughing – on what I don't know. He covered his mouth with his hand, and his eyes started to get teary by the intense coughing.

"Excuse me?" He said, swallowing hard.

"Don't pretend like you didn't hear me," I said dismissively, as if I was the adult and he was the child. It felt great. If only Anna could see me now.

"All my life I have been trying to please you. That's all I've been doing," I ran my hands through my hair, speaking just as much to myself as to my father.

The realization of it all hit me hard. Nearly everything I had done in life had been to satisfy my father. Shaping my body and mind into what I thought he wished – to become the perfect daughter, a daughter everyone would be proud of displaying. Always with the thought in the back of my head, that if I didn't, if I wasn't perfect, he would leave me as well.

"I've accepted the way things were. I've never asked you for _anything_. You didn't hear me complain once about you never being home, or never coming to my science fairs," I was yelling by now.

"Elsa, calm down. Let's just talk about this in a civilized manner." He held out two hands defensively, trying to calm me with his gestures. Shooting one glance back at Vanessa, who stood shocked behind him, my father took a cautious step forward.

"That's the problem dad! We don't talk! You say we're gonna to talk, and then we go back to ignoring the problems like we always do."

It was quiet for a little while, only Vanessa clearing her throat sounded through the large empty room. Surprisingly, I didn't have difficulty breathing. It was as if the adrenaline did me good for once, trying to clear my head, and putting words on my thoughts. And honestly, I didn't mind the aggressive undertone. My father deserved it.

I took a deep breath.

"Why did mom leave?" I whispered.

It was a question I'd never dared to ask. It had never crossed my mind to even consider asking, because I was too afraid how my father would take the question. Would he think I was blaming him? Would he get angry and tell me again and again what a horrible person she is?

"Elsa, this isn't the right time and place–"

"Just tell me!" I screamed. The tears were flowing now.

"She left because of many reasons Elsa…"

"Don't you lie to me. Don't you dare stand there and fucking lie to me," and that was the first time I swore at my father.

Small sweat beads had appeared on his forehead. With one crooked finger, he pulled out the collar of his shirt, allowing air to enter. With a nervous look, he glanced over his shoulder towards Vanessa. Then he looked back at me, releasing an intense sigh.

"She left because I was unfaithful to her."

Relief rushed through me. She didn't just leave because of me. There was more to it than that, I hadn't driven her off, not entirely at least. It felt as if an elephant had rose from my shoulders. My father spoke again, and I fixed my eyes on him.

"Elsa. Your mother had a drug problem, which was why she couldn't get custody of you. My job supplied us with everything we needed, and I-I thought since we were moving so much, it would be for the best just to cut all bonds," he was stumbling over the words. I'd never taken him as such a coward. He said all of this as if it was to his defense. as if this would clear his name. As if he was the hero of this story.

The urge to punch him grew.

"I'm so sorry darling," he started as he walked towards me, and planted a hand on my shoulder. His touch felt like poison. As if the familiar sting of nettles crossed the surface of my skin. I shook his hands off, feeling the sudden urge to wash myself. I felt dirty.

I looked him right in the eye.

"Fuck you," I said.

His eyes went wide, and his mouth hung open. The way his eyebrows knitted together was completely foreign to me. I'd never seen such charismatic expression on his face, and I never knew his facial features allowed such shapes.

"You denied me the opportunity of a mother. In my eyes, you will never be more than a selfish bastard," and at once, the truth was out, and all the hurt that followed with it. However, I was done being the one hurting. In general, I was simply done.

His face was filled with panic.

"S-she left you a letter," he stuttered with watery eyes. Without hesitation, he went to his bedroom. He was back a few moments later, holding an envelope. It had already been opened. I snatched it from his poisonous hands.

Thankfully, I was already wearing my boots, but had unfortunately taken off my jacket, so that I could snuggle further into Anna's sweater. I turned around and headed for the door.

"Elsa…" My father said with pleading eyes. I looked over my shoulder, clasping the letter tightly in one hand.

"You're not a bad person. Just oblivious," were my final words to him.

He looked at me oddly, as if I somehow was the villain. I needed to break something. The urge to smack him across the face was strong, but I resisted once again. Instead, I grabbed the white lamp on top of the bookcase by the door and smashed it to the wall. The porcelain pieces shattered all over the marble floor.

"I've always hated that fucking lamp."

And then I ran, while clenching the letter close to my heart.


	26. A new beginning

**Chapter 26 – A new beginning**

Rain was falling from the sky in fat drops. I was soaked to the bone. It was cold. I was shivering. I remember running; remember my father shouting my name as I ran through the door. I ran as fast as I could, away from everything. Without a coat, without anything. Tears were flowing, mixing with the rain. It was impossible to tell tears and raindrops apart, only the distinct taste of salt revealed the liquid's identity.

I found myself standing outside a door.

To my surprise, it wasn't Anna's door.

I couldn't burden her with this. It was all too much. Too fresh. The wound was open, and couldn't let Anna see me like this. This broken. This shattered, and beyond repair. I loved her so dearly, and I had hurt her. I had hurt her so badly. What if it was too late? What if I couldn't safe this? The thought about me running to her, and her rejecting me at her door was just enough to decide not to run to her. I was too broken to fix anything other than myself right now.

I knocked twice on the large wooden door before wrapping my arms around my torso. My braid hung wet and heavy over my shoulder. I had goosebumps all over my milky white skin. The door opened revealing a short, chubby, bald man on the other side. He looked at me questioning, though the smile on his face made his cheeks look like apples. The smile faded soon enough.

"Hello, can I help you?" he asked gently, but obviously taken by surprise by the sobbing girl on his doorstep. The rain was coming down harder, if that was even possible. Droplets were drumming on my scalp – it was almost impossible to think. I opened my mouth, but closed it again, as no sound would escape my lips. Instead, a chocking sob sounded through the cold afternoon air, nearly drowned out by the sound of the rain.

"Kai dear, who is it?" I heard footsteps coming from behind Kai. Gerda appeared behind him, drying her hands in a piece of dishtowel.

"My goodness, Elsa honey, what are you doing out here?" Gerda announced stunned, before grabbing my wrist pulling me inside, into the warmth of their home. Kai closed the door, shutting out the rain.

"What happened dear is everything alright? Are you hurt?" Gerda inspected me carefully, looking for scratches and cuts. I shook my head. If only she knew the damage wasn't to be seen by the naked eye.

My breathing was irregular, as my body was still processing. All the things that had happened that day. First Anna, and now my father. Saying goodbye to two people like that in one day, should be illegal.

Gerda saw my struggle for air, and rested a hand on my cheek. My clothes were soaked. I was dripping on their carpet, their red beautiful carpet. I was ruining it, which made me cry even harder.

"C-can I-I stay here?" I sobbed.

Gerda planted a soft kiss on my forehead, and nodded

"Let's go get you dried off. Kai, watch the soup will you?"

The man obliged, and walked to the kitchen. Gerda led me up the staircase, never failing to support me in every step we took.

"I'm sure some of my daughter's clothes will fit you just fine," she smiled. Those gentle eyes of her

never failed to calm me.

We reached the top of the staircase. The interior of the house was so cosy.

The wooden panels matched the railings of the staircase. The walls were draped in happy yellow wallpaper, and the curtains were a wine red hue. Despite the tiny size of the house, it felt spacious and homey. Kind of like Anna's house. A humble chandelier hung by the ceiling, displaying its simple beauty by the light hitting the tiny crystals, projecting little fractals of light onto the walls.

"Here we are. Now, you take a nice hot shower while I go find you something to wear. I'll leave some fresh towels outside the door for you," Gerda said as we stood outside a wooden door with a golden knob.

"Take your time dear, soup will be ready when you're done. Here, let me take that, I'll put it on your bed," Gerda carefully took the letter, which I still had clenched in my right hand. It had gotten wet while I was running, even though I had tried to shield it from the heavy droplets. I hoped that it was still manageable read.

The hot water helped. My head was still spinning, but was somewhat clearer than before. The clothes fit well, not perfectly, but sufficiently. The pants were a bit too short and the sweater a bit too loose around the chest. It felt nice in a way though, not having anything clench to my body.

As I stood brushing my hair, a knock sounded on the door. Gerda entered shortly after, and her eyes lit up when she saw me in the black sweat pants, and coral blue wool sweater, her eyes lit up.

"You remind me of my Jane," Gerda said proudly. I smiled, seeing how happy the woman was. I figured she must've miss her daughter terribly. She sat me down on the bed, holding onto my arm. She rubbed it gently, and started braiding my hair.

"So, tell me, is this about Anna?"

I shook my head.

"No. We're not together anymore." The disappointment in her face nearly made me flinch.

"Why, I don't understand, you spoke so fondly of her." Her gentle hands worked efficiently, and she was nearly done braiding by now.

"I didn't have my priorities straight, and I lost her," I explained. After sealing the braid with a hairband, she leaned back to look at me.

"Gibberish! You don't just lose a girl!" Gerda said, half-serious, but in her usual playful tone.

"It doesn't really matter now anyway…" I said.

"Well, if it isn't about Anna, then what it is darling?" Gerda stroked my hair again.

I told her everything. Everything from the moment I stepped foot into the apartment, until the moment I stood on her doorstep. I told her about Vanessa, about my father, about my mother and about the letter.

Without hesitation, Gerda offered – no, demanded – me to stay with them until further notice. Tomorrow, Kai and I would drive by my old apartment building and pick up my stuff, and I would move into Jane's old room. Everything seemed…easier, after that. More manageable. My stomach had uncurled itself, and my head wasn't swimming in thoughts of self-hatred. The only thing that was left after a wonderful meal with Kai and Gerda, was my broken heart. That and the letter that laid mockingly on my pillow, simply waiting for me to open it. However, I was too much of a coward. I decided to give myself a break. This day had been one big emotional rollercoaster, and I wasn't capable of any more heart aching confrontations. Instead, I went to bed, and I slept until the late noon sun awoke me.

It was a nice change to be awoken to the smell of Gerda's pancakes instead of the excessive collision between my door and her vacuum. I sat up and stretched my sore limbs, realizing it was well after noon. School was the last thing on my mind now. It could wait. Right now, I needed closure.

After one delicious cinnamon pancake too many – I seriously thought Gerda was trying to make me fat, the way she kept insisting – I put on my dried off clothes. Kai was already in the car, the motor running. Gerda wasn't coming, she wanted to stay at home and clear some of Jane's old stuff out of the way. This provided me with great opportunity to get to know Kai.

Kai was one of the kindest men I'd ever met. At the end of the car ride, he practically insisted on having me tag along on one of his boat rides. We were approaching the apartment building dangerously fast for my taste, but Kai didn't fail to distract me.

"Elsa, Gerda and I discussed this last night, and I was wondering if you would be interested in a part time job at my café downtown? We thought it could be nice for you to earn your own money, perhaps start saving up for college. The hours are flexible, and the pay is good. I know it's not the most prestigious of jobs but–"

"I would love to Kai," I said. "You two have done so much for me already; I don't know how I could ever repay you." Kai chuckled, a warm laughter.

"I enjoy seeing my wife happy, and she is very fond of you. I think she sees a lot of our daughter in you. We are delighted to have you Elsa," Kai stated certainly.

We reached the complex. It looked much smaller than it did yesterday for some reason. To my relief, no one was home, neither my father nor Vanessa. I felt like a betrayer and a coward emptying out my room while no one was here. Therefore, I decided to leave a final note.

"_Hey dad, I'm fine, enjoy Scandinavia – Love Elsa_."

Those were my final words. There was no anger behind them, no blame. _He still has your damn phone number Elsa, take a chill pill, it's not like you're never going to see the man again._

Kai and I drove home in separate cars. I figured I could perhaps sell the damn thing, and use the money as a pre-college fond. My father owed me at least that much. Buses weren't so bad, right?

The remainder of the day, I spend getting settled in my room. I decided not to get too comfortable. There was no need to take too much advantage of Kai and Gerda's generous hospitality. After stacking my boxes on top of each other in a corner, I laid back on the bed, and held the dreadful letter from my mother in my grasp. Looking at the torn envelope made it even worse, knowing my father had snooped in my personal, and only, message from my mother. I balanced the piece of paper on my forehead, and groaned loudly.

"It's just a piece of paper Elsa," I mumbled to myself. "Just read it already…" but I didn't move. In fact, I fell asleep with the letter on my head, still fully dressed.

I slept until Kai gently ruffled my shoulder.

"Elsa, time for school," he announced. What? Had I already slept through the night? I left the letter on the bed, as I made my way to the shower.

Gerda refused to let me leave without eating breakfast. She observed me warily as I chewed every bite of my food. I had borrowed another one of Jane's sweaters, too lazy to dig through the boxes for my own clothes. The jeans from yesterday would have to suffice – I didn't exactly dig the 'stumpy pants'-look.

On my way out the door, I took a long look in the mirror. A good night's rest had done wonders. My eyes were no longer puffy, and the heavy bags under my eyes were nearly gone.

"You can do this," I said with a firm voice. A smile leaked across my face, as I exited the door.

* * *

><p>The large mahogany desk looked humongous compared to the tiny lady behind it. Her long brown hair nearly reached her waist. It was tied back with a green hairband. The wrinkles by the corners of her mouth deepened as I entered the office with wary steps.<p>

"Ah, Ms. Vinter – have a seat," she gestured to the chair in front of her desk. I slung my backpack off my shoulder, and dropped down into the seat. She ruffled through some paperwork, before giving me her full attention. The glasses on the tip of her nose made her look intimidating.

"I'm Principal Elinor, I don't believe we've met," she reached a hand over the table, and I humbly shook it. She leaned back into her large chair, and folded her hands over her lap.

"I understand that you wish to be enrolled back into school," she said, adjusting her glasses professionally.

"Yes," I confirmed.

"You're aware how close we are to the final exams, aren't you Ms. Vinter?"

I nodded. Principal Elinor glanced over a file.

"Taken you are a senior, and by the looks of your grades, it seems as you've been rather distracted throughout the duration of your stay here… any explanation for that?" She eyed me over her glasses. My gaze dropped, and my knee started bopping.

"I've had some…personal issues," I stated. To my surprise, Principal Elinor's lips quirked up the slightest by the corners.

"That happens to even the best of us," she smiled. "However, I do assume that these issues have been fixed, or at least kept at bay?"

"Yes Ma'am."

The older woman leaned back into her chair once again. Her hands came together, folding them neatly over her lap.

"Well, your father did pay until the end of the school year…" she mumbled. "But with only a few weeks until the final exams, I expect to see hard work. If you want to be enrolled back into this school, you have to exhibit dedication. Your athletic skills are no longer going to suffice; it's crucial you put in the academic work. I expect complete dedication from you Ms. Vinter. No more tardy's. No more incomplete assignments or late homework. I will arrange for you to become assistant basketball coach for the elementary building as extra credit. With that, I'm certain you are fully capable of graduating with your fellow classmates this year."

I smiled widely at her.

"Thank you Principal Elinor," I said as I rose from my chair. I slung my backpack over my shoulder, and walked towards the door.

"I believe in you Ms. Vinter. You can do anything you put your mind to. Don't prove me wrong."

I glanced over my shoulder to send her one last quick nod.

* * *

><p>"Oh thank goodness! We thought you were already gone!" Kristoff exclaimed as I came walking down the hallway. Both he and Sven threw their hands in the air, before Kristoff wrapped me into a tight hug lifting me off the ground. As Kristoff released me – and I was able to breath – Sven draped an arm around me.<p>

"Where've you been?" Sven asked.

"It's a long story," I said, nudging in closer to him, "I can't believe you guys thought I would leave without saying goodbye."

They both looked at me, a faint blush blooming on Kristoff's cheeks. I punched him playfully. We started walking towards class together, Sven still holding me close.

"You seem awfully cheery today My Lady," Sven cooed. "What's up?" The boys looked at me expectantly. Apparently, it wasn't hard to tell how relieved I truly was. I felt lighter. As the guys eyed me I stopped up, smiling brightly.

"I'm not leaving." They both dropped their jaw, mouth hanging wide open. That is, until they started cheering and laughing like complete meatheads. Sven fell to his knees and raised arms towards the ceiling.

"Thank you lord!" He called out.

Kristoff grabbed me in a headlock, and ruffled my hair, "now you're stuck with us forever," he laughed. After five minutes of complete maniacally laughter and celebration, the boys finally settled down.

"Have you told Anna?" Sven asked eagerly.

I shook my head. A sadness settled in my stomach. The sound of her name made my heart ache. _Anna_. Would this change things between us? Would me staying fix all of this? I deeply hoped so, with all of my heart. On the other hand, the bond of trust between Anna and I was probably broken. Anna deserved to be with someone who wouldn't bail on her just because of a few bumps on the road. She deserved to be a first priority. As much as I wanted to be that person, I wasn't sure if I could.

Perhaps I should put myself first for once. Perhaps I should figure out who I was, without my father, without the security of the dysfunctional home I just left. Maybe I needed time to be me. Right now, I wasn't sure if I was the best for Anna.

"Have… have you spoken to her?" I asked carefully. Sven nodded.

"A little, we haven't seen much of her. From what Rapunzel tells me the girl's a mess…"

_Glad to know I'm not the only one…_

"Aren't you going to tell her the good news?" Kristoff cheered. "You guys can get back together, and everything will be back to the way it was!" He sounded so sure, I was honored to hear the faith the boy had in me and Anna.  
>"I don't know guys…," my tone of voice made both frown.<p>

"Elsa, what happened? Why aren't you moving, did something happen?" Sven asked.

I told them as much I could manage before the bell rang, leaving out some minor details. None of them said much as I spoke. I realized, this was the first time I'd shared such intimate details about my life with them. I told them about my meeting with the principal, and how I had to get my act together if I wanted to graduate. Sven agreed to help me with the academics every day after school, on the days I didn't have work or practice.

The tardy bell rang, and for once, I couldn't actually be late to class. Kristoff and Sven gave me one last massive hug before we parted. On my way to class I decided I had to talk to Anna. I needed to tell her. About everything. I roamed through my backpack for my phone and dialed Anna up. It went straight to voicemail. I knew I couldn't fit the whole shebang into one voicemail – and I wouldn't want to, I needed to talk to Anna in person. But either way, I decided to leave a message after the beep.

"Hey Anna… I-it's me. Um, Elsa. Well, I guess you already knew that. Look, I really think we should talk. Could you… could you call me back? I'd really like it if you called me back. Gosh, this is such a lousy voicemail, I'm sorry. Please just call me back when you get this?"

Voicemails had never been my strong suit, but I figured it would do. For now…

Afterwards I rushed to class, thankfully not tardy, and sat down in the front row for once. I pulled out my notebook, and a pen. The teacher nearly looked shocked at my sudden participation and dedication towards the class. The class begun and I started scribbling down.

_Alright Ms. Vinter, you can do this. Focus._

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Sorry if this chapter is a mess, I'm super tired... Thank you guys so much for your reviews - you're just awesome. Stay cool B)


	27. Rather loved and lost

**Chapter 27 – Rather loved and lost**

Time seemed to speed up. Every waking moment of my day was occupied by either school, work, practice or homework. It often led to late nights at Sven's, resulting in me sleeping over at his house at least three times a week. He had taken the role as my math tutor since Anna and I still hadn't faced each other since the day by the fire escape. She was still skillfully avoiding me. To her defense, she was rather good at it. She still hadn't called me back (I mean, I knew it was a horrifying voicemail I'd left her, but still). I had tried announcing to her that I wasn't leaving, but she wouldn't even pick up her phone. In the end, I decided to focus on graduating instead of worrying about Anna. Studying took my mind off things to my luck and utter surprise. Kristoff even lend in a helping hand occasionally, going through flashcards with me.

Work was refreshing. The café had a lovely atmosphere, and the people there were welcoming. The manager, Marshall, complimented me on my quick learning skills. Soon it was no big deal to take and remember orders, or balance the food and beverages on the trays. In fact, I enjoyed my job very much. There was something about being self-sufficient; it gave me a great sense of independence and freedom.

A few weeks had passed since I tore free from my father's demanding claws and gathered my newfound independence. Graduation was over; I was free. Truthfully, I never thought I would finish high school. For me, this was a personal victory. I had done the impossible and graduated with my class, which included Sven. Now, all that was left was waiting patiently to go on summer vacation, with only a few days left of school. In the meantime, I had picked up a few extra shifts at Kai's café. Now that I was finally moving out and preparing to go to college (unbelievable, I know right?) I needed as much work as I could get.

As soon as my shift had ended, my phone buzzed.

**Sven **(18:01): _We got it!_

**Elsa** (18:02):_ No way!_

**Sven** (18:02):_ Yes way! We get the keys tomorrow!_

I smiled brightly - something I seemed to do a lot lately - and started typing in a cheerful response. However, with my lack of coordinating skills when walking while texting, I didn't finish my reply before bumping into some poor soul.

"Oh! I'm so sorry, are you oka–"

The wild red locks had me thrown off guard. The face that I missed so dearly over the past few weeks was now right in front of me. It was as if my heart tore right open here and there, ripping even further apart. Apparently, the few stiches that I had tried to hold it together with could not withstand such a head-on confrontation. There she stood, in all her perfectness, wearing her peachy lip-gloss and brown leather boots looking as mesmerizing as she always did.

"Anna…" I announced stupidly, though completely lost in my absentmindedness that her beauty had caused.

"Hi Elsa," she smiled warmly, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. It was like being awestruck, and I nearly had to shake my head to focus.

"How've you been?" I asked lamely. Anna didn't seem to catch on to the awkwardness in my voice.

"Good," her voice was not the usual cheery jitter, "I've, um, decided to apply for UCLA next year." She sounded proud of her decision.

"That's amazing Anna! I'm so proud of you," I said without realizing it. Anna simply smiled again, a polite kind of smile.

"What about you?"

"I'm good. I got a job at the, well, the café across the street," I pointed towards Kai's café. Anna's gaze followed my finger, giving the café a quick glance. The people roaming outside seemed happy and delighted.

"Sven and I are moving in together, we're actually getting the keys to our new place tomorrow. And I got into the community college's art department. That art book you gave me… it really helped me realize… I-I actually send it in as my art portfolio. I know it's not a realistic career goal, but it's a start…" _She probably knows all of this, stupid!_ Rapunzel and Sven hung out often, so I wouldn't be surprised if Sven had kept her updated on my current occupations. _Well, she hasn't heard it from _you_,_ I thought and relaxed again.

"It sounds wonderful Elsa. Really." Anna buried her hands in her pockets.

_I miss you,_ was all that crossed my mind as she stood there.

The spark in her eyes was gone. Those beautiful teal eyes seemed miserable without it. We both stood for a bit, not knowing what to say. I was positive she knew all about the events that had happened those mere weeks ago. How I had left my father and moved in with Gerda. How I had worked my butt off to graduate. There was nothing more to say really.

"It was good running into you." _I love you_, my brain uttered.

"Yeah, you too," she said.

"I guess I'll see you around?" _Please come back to me._

"I'll see you around Elsa," the redhead said. She gave me a tiny wave before she passed me. I couldn't help but watch as she walked further and further away from me.

* * *

><p>"I'm the king of the wooooooorld!" Sven yelled out the window after putting his box down. He was leaning out the slightest, holding onto the windowsill with his giant hands. Gerda's motherly instinct took over, as she yelled from the kitchen that she wouldn't pay for the ambulance if he fell those two stories. Sven giggled, I could see he was tempted to lean out even further, but decided against it when he saw me.<p>

"Good for you Mr. Dawson, now if you wouldn't mind helping me with this box," I said and nearly tripped as I stood balancing on the threshold. Sven came to my aid quickly and grabbed the box out of my hand as if it was filled with feathers.

I put my hands in my sides as I stood admiring the living room. It wasn't much, but it was ours. To my left was the open kitchen, which was spacious enough to hold a small dining table. Across from me was my room, with Sven's room right next to it. The walls were bare, some exposing the red bricks the exterior of the building was made of. It was authentic in a sense, it gave the place personality. Some of the wallpaper on the other walls was peeling, but could easily be fixed. The wooden floors wasn't shiny anymore, and it was only Sven's room that was coated with a rug.

Kai was in the corner putting up some shelves, while Gerda was in the kitchen batching up some sandwiches for us all. Sven's parents had been kind enough to sponsor us with cutlery and plates, along with an old ragged couch. Everything was soon to come together, and the place suddenly started to look more and more like a home.

A loud grunt sounded from the hallway, and Kristoff entered the apartment with sweat beats dripping off his forehead.

"This was the last of it," he huffed, drying the sweat off with the back of his hand. Then he walked to the couch and slumped lazily down onto it. Gerda announced that sandwiches were ready, and the boys sought to the kitchen, hovering over the sandwiches like hungry vultures.

"So," Kristoff said with his mouth full of sandwich, "what're you guys gonna do if someone brings a date home?" I rolled my eyes fearing what to come.

Gerda stifled a smile, while Kai hardly noticed our conversation.

"I guess we're just going to sort to the sock rule, how does that sound Elsa?" Sven grinned. My cheeks were getting warm and a blush bloomed across my face.

"You guys are unbelievable," I mumbled and punched both of them before heading to my room to unpack. I heard them all laugh from the living room. It was thought-provoking knowing how all three of them loved to see me squirm.

Evening came upon us, and I retrieved to my room for the night. It was late, and I was tired from the day's events – moving took up a lot of energy. Gerda and Kai had left, and Kristoff and Sven were currently playing videogames in the living room.

I was unpacking my clothes, when my eyes caught something. Something I had been avoiding for almost a month by now. The letter from my mother was laying on top of my clothing. I remember packing it into a box, barely being able to look at the damn thing without nearly bursting into tears.

Shutting my door firmly, I walked over and sat on the edge of my bed. With steady hands I opened the envelope. The text was smudged from the downpour the night I had run away, however, it was still manageable to read. I didn't know what I expected – whether it was pages of pages of heartfelt gibberish about how one day we should be reunited and have the mother-daughter bond we both so deeply desired, or a simple sentence revealing a lame-ass apology and practically telling me to stick it where the sun don't shine. _Stop thinking, just read it!_ I unfolded the single piece of paper, and let my eyes roll over the smudgy text.

"_My dear Princess,_

_I love you, more than you will ever know. Please know that if it wasn't for the circumstances, I would never have left you. _

_Your father swore to explain when you got older. He means well, even though he doesn't always show it. The man loves you, he just doesn't know how to express it. Be patient with him._

_Promise me you will be open to whatever life gives you – I'm sure it only wants the best for you. I know I do. Elsa, my sweetheart, never be afraid to reach out and grab whatever you desire. You may get burned, but it's better knowing that you tried than live in oblivion. Being an over thinker myself, I know it can be difficult. Make sure to get out of your head once in a while, and don't take the problems of the world upon your shoulders._

_I'm sure you will grow up to be the fine competent young woman I always knew you would be. _

_Don't try looking for me. You wouldn't like what you found, and I don't think my heart could take losing you twice. _

_Know that I think of you every day, but also know that you are better off this way, without me._

_Love always,_

_Mom"_

That was it. 13 years of not knowing all crunched down onto one single piece of paper. She did love me. She didn't want to leave, but at the same time, she didn't want me to find her? The contradiction made no real sense to me.

Of all the things she could have written, all the life advice she could have given, and she told me to get out of my head and grab what I desired. To not carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. I remember my mother as being the person who always knew what to say. And after all these years, without barely knowing me or knowing what I had become, she still knew exactly what to say.

_Damn this woman… I have to meet her._

She was wrong about one thing though. According to my book at least, I would argue that thirteen years would display a certain kind of patience. My father had had his chances, and I was done. The intention wasn't to cut the man out of my life completely, however, from now on things should be done on my premises or not at all.

But what now? This was it, there was no more. No more wondering what could have been, and what was. No more speculating whether or not I was good enough, or deserved my mother's love. What was I supposed to do now? Dismiss the fact that I had parents at all, or reestablish contact with both of them? The options were endless and send my head spinning.

_Elsa, you're doing it again!_

And here I was again with all my thoughts. I was doing exactly what my mother told me not to do. Overthinking every possible scenario, imagining every possible twist and turn, overanalyzing everything, everything, _everything!_ It needed to stop!

I ripped out the plug that fuelled my thoughts. No more thinking.

All that was left was one thought though. Only one.

_I have to get Anna back._

And it wouldn't stop coursing through my head.

A tear trailed down my cheek. _Reach out and grab it Elsa._

With no further hesitation, I ran, as fast as my legs would carry me.

* * *

><p>"Hey Elsa, where's the fire?!" Kristoff yelled as I was about to bold out the door. I looked at them wide-eyed.<p>

"I-I have to get Anna back! I'm getting her back," I said, talking a thousand words a minute.

"Wow, wow, wow, slow down, isn't it kinda late? Maybe you should wait till tomorrow," the blond said in a responsible tone.

"What are you talking about you nerd! Go Elsa, go!" Sven yelled with a huge-ass smile as I sprinted down the staircase, taking two steps at a time. I heard Sven cheering at the top of his lungs from the front door, which I hadn't bothered closing. As I ripped my car door open, Kristoff and Sven appeared in the window both hanging out of it as much as they could.

"Go get her Tiger!" Kristoff laughed.

Sven was so overly excited he couldn't stop laughing or yelling. "Look at her go! Our little Elsa," Sven shouted at Kristoff as he pretended to wipe away a tear. Their cheering nearly woke up the whole street and they received a few complaints, which they simply shrugged off as they kept cheering.

Nothing crossed my mind in particular as I was driving towards Anna's house, a couple of miles above the speed limit admittedly. Luckily, the streets were rather empty at this time, and the fear of cops didn't pass my mind either. My mind was pretty much empty, except for a picture of the beautiful redhead. I wasn't preparing what I was going to say. I wasn't thinking about everything that could go wrong.

I tapped the steering wheel impatiently whenever I held for a red light. _Turn dammit! _After what seemed like an eternity a green light flashed on, and I stepped on the speeder. Ten minutes later, I stood in front of Anna's house. The windows were dark, and there was no smoke from the chimney. The house exhibited no sign of life, in fact, it looked rather abandoned. However, the newly cut grass assured me its residents were still very much present. The streetlights were the only source of light in a radius of 2 kilometers.

_Oh shit, maybe it _was_ a bit too late to do this…_

But I had gathered too much courage up to stop now. Instead of walking to the front door and knock, as I usually would do, I stepped into their front yard. Thank goodness Anna lived on the ground floor, or else this would be a lot harder to do.

I walked to the far end of the house. Very gently, I tapped on Anna's window. There was no response so I tried again. The curtains were blocking my view, and I couldn't even see if the redhead was in her bed. _Maybe she's at Rapunzel's_, the thought made me frown. I stood for several minutes, scared beyond belief that Anna might not turn up. Waiting anxiously, I tapped a few more times. Reality hit, and I had to face that this shit probably only happened in sappy romances.

I was about to leave and walk towards my car when a scrambling noise sounded from inside the house. The curtains were pulled apart roughly, revealing a startled redhead. The shock was evident on her face, but was soon superseded with anger. Anna furiously pushed open the window, though without making much noise.

"Jesus Christ Elsa, you scared the living shit out of me!" Anna hissed, holding a protective hand over her beating heart.

"You know, normal people use the front door," she snarled. _Okay, she is _not_ in a good mood_. I didn't expect to be invited in under the circumstances. Clearly, I had scared the crap out of her. However, nothing could stop the joyful smile that spread across my lips upon seeing her; seeing her wonderful twin braids, and her freckled nose.

"Is there a specific reason you decided to break into my house in the middle of–"

"I love you!" I interrupted. But before I could say anymore, Anna slapped a hand over my mouth, and held a finger towards her lips. She then released her grip. I took a deep breath, for once, not having planned out what I was going to say. Calmly I came closer to the girl, and started improvising in a low voice.

"I love you Anna, more than you could ever imagine. I'm sorry it took so long for me to figure out that I need you in my life," I snuck in a quick breath of air before continuing, "things have changed, _I_ have changed! You were never my second choice. But I've learned that it's just as important to put yourself first sometimes. I just needed time to figure out all these things, these things…" my mind was running into a loop. I lost her eyes, as mine were now fixating onto the floor. There was so much I wanted to tell her, and not nearly enough time. Anna's hand came up and cupped my cheek, seeing my struggle.

So I decided to settle for the most simple thing I could think of.

"You never gave up on me when I was running from my feelings. I'm not giving up on you now," I said with a shaky breath.

There. I said it. I knew, from that point and out, I could do no more. Now I didn't have to live in the eternal regret of never knowing what would have happened if I hadn't pursued Anna; still not knowing whether my fingers would remain intact, or become badly burned.

Anna sighed heavily, her eyes growing dark. Hurt was evident on her face. A glistering tear leaked from her sparkly teals eyes. I collected her hands in mine, capturing them and creating a great knot of fingers, before resting my chin them. Anna was leaning on her elbows, looking down on me.

"Is it because you don't trust me?" I asked lightly. She shook her head, causing a tear to land on the back of my hand. I clenched our hands tighter together, and kissed her knuckles.

"Then what is it?" My voice was calm, soothing. She sniffled, and I kissed her hand another time, while rubbing my thumb over hers. She shook her head while speaking.

"At some point… one of us is going to leave. If not you, then me…," her voice was so fragile. My eyebrows knitted together.

"I'll either be off to college somewhere, or you'll be back in Europe…," she sniffed again. "This past month has been so full of hurt… I couldn't stand losing you twice…," she whispered. My mind darted back to the letter from my mother. Those were her words. Nevertheless, they weren't going to stop me. Just like they were not stopping me to begin the search for my mother.

"Oh Anna, I could never leave you… this month should be proof enough of that," I laughed half-heartedly. "I'm not going anywhere. It's time for me to put down some roots… I think that'll be good for me," Anna met my eyes. "And we're going to figure it out together when the time comes, when you go off to college. We still got a whole year. We'll figure something out, I promise."

Anna let out a sound. I couldn't tell if she was chuckling or sobbing, perhaps it was mixture of both. Then she untangled her hands, and as I thought she was about to leave and smack the window shut, she forcefully slung her hand around my neck and pulled our lips together. There we stood, kissing through the window. It was as if we had never stopped. Her lips still tasted the same, still just as soft.

Anna and I flew apart when we heard the sound of some clearing their throat.

"That was a beautiful speech Elsa," Anna's mother spoke. She was standing in the doorway to Anna's room wearing a grey bathrobe. "But since I've now received several calls from the neighbors about a burglar trying to climb in through my daughter's window, would you care to come in?"

My cheeks flushed bright red. Mrs. Anderson had with no doubt heard everything. I was thankful she had let me finish, knowing she had probably peaked her head out the window, before waiting by the door until we were done talking.

I looked towards Anna who nodded, and practically pulled me over the windowsill.

"She could've just used the door dear," Mrs. Anderson sighed.

"Where's the fun in that?" Anna said, as she pulled me in for a hug when my feet finally found the ground.

"Goodnight girls," Mrs. Anderson yawned, and closed the door. The room fell dark again. Anna pulled me towards the bed before I could even get my shoes off. She helped me kick them off once we were in bed however. Then she pulled off my jacket as she kissed me dearly. None of us could help but giggle by pure and utter happiness of being reunited.

"Wait, is that my sweater?" Anna laughed. I looked down upon the blue zipper-less sweater I pulled on whenever my heart was throbbing too hard in agony. I nodded, hiding an embarrassed smile.

"You dork," she mumbled. "Good thing I love you," her voice was teasing and sleepy at the same time. Anna gave me another passion filled kiss, and pushed herself as close to me as possible before pulling the covers over us.

I fell asleep in her arms and that's when I knew, I was exactly where I was supposed to be.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Epilogue will be out soon :) Fear not you guys. One of you awesome readers asked if I was interested in writing a couple of chapters for A-Air from Anna's perspective – so look out for those! Although, I probably won't have time until Ice Roses is finished.

Until next time! Stay awesome you guys,

Banana-viking


	28. All I Want

**A/N: **Thank you for all your love and support. You guys have truly been amazing. A special thanks to my friend Andy, who provided with moral support and helped occasionally beta this story.

This final chapter is named after the song "All I Want" the Ellie Goulding cover (since it is sung from a woman's perspective - originally by Kodaline). This has pretty much been Elsa's theme song throughout the whole story, and I've been listening to it forever and ever. I know it's a love song, but I feel like it can be applied to both Anna and Elsa's mother in some aspects.

Until next time!

- _Banana-viking_

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><p><strong>Epilogue – All I want<strong>

_**Six months later**_

"But what about the art exhibition?" Sven asked, as he writhed around on the couch, adjusting himself so that he could see me. His stirring resulted in him practically laying upside down with his feet sticking in the air.

"I told you, we're gonna to be back in two weeks. Plenty of time for me to prepare," I answered, while folding a blouse neatly for then to place it in my luggage.

"I still can't believe you got into the advanced art exhibition programme. You're freshman for heaven's sake!" He exclaimed proudly, now trying to stuff Oreos into his mouth, still upside down. To my surprise, he succeeded – not without leaving a trail of crumbs everywhere though. He chewed loudly.

"Guess the coordinators finally got their heads out of their asses and saw what extraordinary talents my baby possesses," Anna hummed as she walked towards the couch from the kitchen, carrying three cans of soda. She had a way of making foul language sound charming. I tried not to smile, reluctant to encourage the two and their goofiness. Anna elegantly jumped over Sven, and slumped down next to him, placing her feet in the air while dangling her head off the edge of the couch, just like Sven. Both reached for an Oreo, which they tried to eat in respective positions. Anna and Sven munched on their Oreos while I stared at them, grimacing.

"Disgusting…" I mumbled.

"I'm sorry," Sven said with his mouth full, "couldn't hear you over the deliciousness of my upside-down cookie-cream sandwich."

I shook my head dismissively and went back to packing.

"Where's Kristoff? He with Merida?" Anna asked curiously, the blood starting to run to her head making her cheeks red.

"Nah, they broke up," Sven announced, "she was a real bitch to him, so he ended it. He's at work, he'll be here later."

I knew Kristoff and Merida were over, but it didn't seem like Kristoff took it too harsh. He was his happy self, and in my opinion, he deserved better than Merida. She could be quite demanding at times, and for a lazy lad like Kristoff, the two didn't always mix well. Sven and Rapunzel however were going steady. Although Sven complained over her ex at times, apparently, he could be a real pain in the ass at times, and clearly not able to take a hint. Rapunzel stayed over most nights here, just like Anna. It could be somewhat crowded at times, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

"So when're you leaving?" Sven asked, now getting up, and grabbing one of the icy cold drinks Anna had placed on the sofa table.

"Tomorrow morning," I replied, "Denmark is nine hours ahead, so we'll be there the day after tomorrow at some point."

"What? Denmark? I thought you were going to Norway to visit your dad?" Sven's face was filled with confusion.

"We are," Anna interjected, "but we're stopping by Denmark first to look for Elsa's mom. Elsa found one of her mother's childhood friends whom we're planning to pay a visit. Her father isn't expecting us until Thursday." Anna got up, and walked to me, rubbing a hand on my back before lacing an arm around my waist.

My father and I were on speaking terms again, in fact, it was he who had invited Anna and me. The split had to some extend made our relationship… stronger. We had started emailing, which perhaps was the right way of communication for us – not much emotion needed to write a simple email. To my surprise, Vanessa and he were still together. And the best part of having a father as a pilot? Free tickets.

"Wow Elsa, are you sure you're ready for that?" Sven asked. Anna was hugging me from behind now, burying her face in my shoulder, while swaying us from side to side.

"Positive," I smiled.

Sven wasn't the only one who was concerned. Anna had been worried sick about my decision. Even though she was good at hiding it, and wanted to support me fully, Anna was worried. However, the redhead was determined on helping me solve this mystery. She wanted nothing more in the world than to stand by my side.

Her mother had given her permission to come with me, and celebrate Christmas in Norway with my dad and Vanessa. Mrs. Anderson had sat down with me one afternoon, without Anna, with the intention of preparing me for the worst in the kindest way possible. What we might find. I had showed both her and Anna the letter from my mother. The letter that was so lovely contradicting. They were worried about the clear warning my mother had given me, about not finding her. I told them there was no way they could change my mind.

"Are you done packing yet?" Anna mumbled into my shoulder impatiently. I leaned my head back into Anna's shoulder and sighed. I really didn't feel like packing anymore, but I had that usual feeling that I was forgetting something.

"I wanna watch an episode of Orange is the New Black before we go to bed," the redhead said. Sven flicked the TV on and Anna dragged me to the couch. There was room enough for the three of us, but only because Anna had pulled me down on her lap. Sven shot a glance towards us, smiling crookedly.

"You guys are so cute," he said in his best fangirl voice. Anna and I barely had time to laugh before Kristoff barged through the door. Knocking was a long forgotten necessity between the five of us now.

"Hey kids, I'm home," Kristoff said and slumped to the floor in front of the couch, grabbing a can of soda. Anna nudged him with her knee, a silent greeting, while Sven flung himself around his neck from behind.

"It's good to see you too buddy," Kristoff laughed, padding Sven on the arm. Sven leaned back into the couch, and leaned an arm on my knee. Those big puppy-dog eyes rested on me for just a moment, before returning to the screen.

"I brought nutrition!" Kristoff exclaimed while pulling a McDonald's paper bag out of his backpack.

"You call that nutrition?" I asked sceptically. The three of them giggled.

"Of course! Don't you see that tiny piece of lettuce in there," Kristoff emitted, flashing a hamburger before our eyes before greedily popping a bite.

"And do you know the best part?" Kristoff continued with his mouth full.

"That one day you will learn to eat with your mouth closed?" Anna asked hopefully.

"No," Kristoff responded with a snort, and swallowed the humongous mouthful or food. "Guess who was behind the counter at McD." We all just sat and stared at him in anticipation. "Simon," he then said.

There was something about Simon ending up at the Golden Seagull that had us all laughing like maniacs. I felt Anna chuckle behind me as she leaned her head back bubbling with laughter. It wasn't the fact that Simon was working at McDonalds, I mean, a job is a job. It was more the fact that he had to serve Kristoff. That he now in a sense had the upper hand. It was like a victory, really. Karma is a bitch I guess.

We all ate and drank and watched, while simply enjoying the fact that we were all here together, and after the episode we stayed up late and played cards. It wasn't until Anna ran a hand over my thigh I suddenly felt the urge to retrieve for the night. As her finger started drawing circles on my jeans, our eyes met, and a mischievous grin formed on her face.

I leaned over and kissed her cheek, before getting to my feet. My left foot was asleep, and the small tingling refused to leave until I wiggled my toes.

"Goodnight you guys," I said and dragged Anna up from the floor in one fluent motion. Anna followed my lead, as I pulled her in both arms after me. It wasn't supposed to look seductive, but Sven didn't hesitate throwing in a smug comment.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do," he grinned. I huffed at his arrogance, and repeated 'goodnight' before shutting the door firmly. Anna had already manoeuvred herself towards the bed, and now laid on her back with her hands behind her head. For a second I looked at her, adoring her dreamy expression.

"Are you just going stand there all day, or are going join me?" She asked as she popped up on her elbows, stretching the fabric across her chest tightly (read perfectly). In two long strides, I made it to the bed and practically placed myself on top of her. The smile that appeared on her lips was undeniably satisfying. Her hand shot up, brushing my hair back and caressing my cheek, before pulling me down for a searing kiss. The kissing was intense for a minute, tongues in heated battle and lips in constant contact. When a pleasure-filled moan sounded from Anna, I pulled back, tracing a thumb lovingly over her soft lips.

"Shh, the boys are right next door," I shushed, now placing a kiss right by her earlobe. And then a second kiss right by her ear.

"It's not my fault your walls are thinner than paper," Anna squirmed and pulled her shoulder up towards her ear to prevent any more tickling kisses. As she turned her head, I quickly placed a kiss on her other ear and Anna twisted beneath me, trying to suppress a squeal.

"You know," she said, rubbing a hand over her ear, "this means war."

Before I knew it, gravity changed, and Anna was now on top, digging her hands into my sides. I laughed in surprise, thankful I hadn't stopped working out completely, meaning I could still take on Anna. She squealed as I was suddenly on top again. In the end, we were half wrestling each other to be on top, until we rolled off the bed and onto the floor. That simply made us laugh even harder.

Unfortunately for me, Anna had won, and was now hovering over me, holding herself up by the elbows. Her petite figure was resting between my legs as she raised a hand to run through my hair. Her mouth was right there, and it was begging to be kissed. Anna responded immediately, pressing her lips carefully against mine. The kiss became heated rather quickly. I closed my eyes, dreamily kissing the girl with deep passion.

Her breath was shaky, when she whispered into my ear. "So…you wanna…?"

Before she gave me a chance to respond, she rolled her hips forcefully against my core, thrusting her hips against mine. Instinctively, my legs wrapped around her. A moan escaped, and an even louder one sounded as she repeated the action once more. My head was swimming, but I had to concentrate.

"Anna, the boys are right next door," I mumbled, this time in a more serious tone. "I'm pretty convinced they don't wanna hear what's going on in here."

"You might be wrong about that," she smirked.

"Well…" I stated, brushing Anna's bangs away from her face, "I'm pretty convinced _I_ don't want them to hear what's going on in here."

The downside of having a roommate: keeping it down low. There were certain unwritten rules about having loud sex with your roommate next door. You simply didn't. That had been our agreement after Sven and Rapunzel had been going heavy at it one night. Rapunzel being Anna's cousin and all, made the loud moans and heavy banging on the wall rather uncomfortable. Anna had to leave, forcing me with her, and we spent a night sleeping in my car. The day after only resulted in sore backs on me and Anna's behalf, and blushing cheeks on Rapunzel's behalf. Sven never blushed, simple as that. He might even have looked proud. We had a talk, and agreed that certain boundaries and noise-levels had to be withheld to sustain the peace in the condo.

"Well, guess we'll just have to be quiet then," Anna mumbled into my ear, and slipped a hand down my pants. Her touch was as lovely as always, and I was definitely in the mood. Still, I couldn't relax.

"Anna, we'll have our own hotel room in a less than 30 hours…." But my argument was lost as she dipped a finger inside of me. Soon, her fingers were doing their magic, and all I could do was try not to be too loud. Anna couldn't help covering my mouth since she sustained her weight on a single elbow, while her other hand was…well.

My fingers were digging deep into the rug, so instead, she silenced me with her lips. Anna's fingers were working intensely now, picking up speed. One digit turned into two, as she was pumping them in and out of me. My hips were moving in the same rhythm her thrusts.

It wasn't long until I came undone in the redhead's hands, and I tightened around her fingers.

"Come for me Elsa," the redhead whispered in my ear.

I had to break the kiss to bury my face in Anna's shoulder to cover my oncoming orgasm. I bit the fabric of the shirt, muffling the small whines of pleasure.

Anna rested her head on my chest as I was trying to catch my breath. Goodness, this girl was going to be the end of me. Yet, the smile plastered on my face stood strong, and I wrapped my arms around my girlfriend. I licked my lips, and I tasted salt from the tiny layer of sweat settled upon my face.

"Good?" Anna asked, now raising her head to meet my eyes. I nodded.

"Amazing," I mumbled with a smile.

We laid there for a few minutes before Anna pulled me up on the bed. She was wearing a mischievous smile.

"I've got a surprise for you," she giggled, as she climbed on top of me.

"Really now? What surprise?" I smiled, watching her lovely smile, as she tugged her hair behind her ear.

"See for yourself," she giggled, glancing down, and then looking back at my eyes. I stifled a laugh, but took the hint. Slowly, I unbuttoned her jeans, popping the button open seductively. I quirked an eyebrow, but Anna just kept smiling. Pulling down her pants, I revealed a couple of jet-black panties with a Batman logo on there. I gasped, and then beamed at the redhead.

"You wore the batman underwear," I giggled, though more eager to see it on the floor than on Anna.

"With matching bra and everything," she stated proudly.

"Can't wait to see it," I mumbled under her lips as I started undressing her.

* * *

><p>"<em>Ladies and gentlemen, we're preparing for take-off, please fasten your seatbelts…."<em>

"You ready?"

She nodded, my hand resting on top of hers. The propellers were working on max. Anna turned her hand to intertwine our fingers; she clenched my hand nervously. Then we took off, leaving the ground, and reaching the clouds in a matter of seconds.

"And there goes my flying-virginity," Anna snickered, as she observed in awe how the city became smaller and smaller underneath us.

* * *

><p>I knocked twice on the door. Nervous, but not anxious. The hallway was a moss-green kind of shade. Rather distasteful in my opinion. The stairs were worn out, and looked like they could give into our weight at any minute. The sound of police sirens sounded in the distance, making Anna clench my hand tighter. A few seconds passed before the sound of footsteps appeared from the other side of the door.<p>

"Elsa… please, just don't get too disappointed if things doesn't turn out…," Anna got lost halfway through, as the footsteps grew louder. I looked to meet her eyes, giving her a reassuring smile and her hand a tiny squeeze. The door flung open, and revealed a dingy old woman. Well, she wasn't exactly old per sae, however, the wrinkles around her mouth and eyes added years to her complexion. Her thin, almost transparent, hair stood wildly as a mane around her head. She looked fragile, as if a slight breeze would be enough to knock the poor lady over. Her hands were bony, and the veins popped out as if worms were climbing over her skin.

"Hvad vil i?" She hissed. I took a tiny step forward, pushing Anna behind me by the slightest.

"Hej," I started with unease, "mit navn er Elsa Vinter, jeg er Inga Jensens datter… Er du Gertrud Egedal?"

The woman tensed by the sound of my mother's maiden name. Her eyes became stiff and her grip on the door became fierce. She blinked a couple of times, as if Anna and I were to disappear suddenly when reopening her eyes.

"Du godeste…." She whispered. One of her shaky hands reached out, and nearly cupped one of my cheeks. Her eyes were watery.

"Du leder efter din mor…," she choked, her voice was full of hurt and pity. I nodded, even though I didn't think she needed a response.

"Ved du hvor jeg kan finde hende?" I asked eagerly.

"Jeg er desværre bange for det ikke er muligt. Hun døde af en overdosis sidste år. "

"Oh…" was all I could manage to say with the lump stuck in my throat. A variety of emotions rushed over me. I'd always been used to the idea that my mother and I at least shared the same sky, at least having that one thing in common, but now that idea was dead. Along with my mother.

I knew tracking down my mother could withhold a numerous amount of disappointment and hurt. Honestly, I couldn't decide whether I had wanted to just have never found her, than found out she was dead. However, the faint words of my mother's letter was still imprinted sharply in my brain. Rather have tried, than never knowing what could have been. And now I knew. Now I never had to speculate about what could have been, whether she would have been happy to see me. Whether I could have helped her, or saved her even.

"Tak for hjælpen," I then said stiffly, and Gertrud nodded. Anna looked at me, worry and bewilderment displayed on her face, while I dragged her down the stairs. We made it outside, and it became easier to breathe.

"Elsa, what happened? What did she say?" Anna articulated, "your face just… dropped," she then added with a low voice. I bit my lower lip, uncertain whether I was about to cry, or just generally unhappy. It wasn't like I knew her that well. But still, she was my mom, and I had lost her. For good.

"She…," I breathed. Though the air easily managed to reach my lungs, I found it difficult to speak. Like when you are out of breath, but not as a result from an intense workout. More like the feeling when a situation or feeling just steals the air from you. Not knocking it out of you, just steals it.

"She OD'ed last year."

Anna took a second after the words had left my mouth. We were standing on the street, a heavy layer of grey clouds soaring over us. Then she wrapped her arms around me, not saying anything for a while. I returned her hug, pulling her close, and resting my chin on her shoulder while I stared into nothing in particular.

"I'm so sorry Elsa," Anna whispered. Her embrace loosened, and she stepped back to see my face, hands still on my elbows.

"I just… I just wanted to see her… I guess…" I mumbled. That was the truth. All I wanted was just to lay my eyes upon her features, just one last time. See what she looked like, see where I came from. Maybe, that had been all I wanted.

* * *

><p>Anna and I just laid in bed in our hotel room. We didn't feel like going out and explore the city, especially not me. Anna was the big spoon again. Her thumb caressed my hand. It felt nice. I still hadn't cried, and wasn't sure if I was going to. We didn't talk much about what had happened. In the end, there wasn't much to talk about. I knew it had been a possibility all along, but I never thought it would become reality. I wondered if my father knew. Not that it would stop me from telling him, he deserved to know as well.<p>

After a few hours, some room service, and going back to spooning, I felt just a tad better. Anna assured me, that no matter what, I couldn't have done anything. I couldn't have prevented it.

We just laid in each other's embrace.

Anna was all I wanted.

"Alright, I've made up my mind," she said suddenly. She didn't move, nor did I.

"Wait, what are we talking about?"

My mind was trying to recall our last conversation, but her words still didn't seem to make sense.

"About winter and summer. I told you I'd get back to you when I'd decided."

For the first time that day, I let out a tiny laugh. Wow, that girl remembered everything. My mind flashed back to when Anna paid me the surprise visit before the big game. I remembered her head laying in my lap, discussing how summer was better than winter.

"And what did you decide?" I asked.

Anna took a deep breath, dragging out the tension for as long as possible.

"I think winter is pretty amazing…."

* * *

><p>The End<p>

* * *

><p><em><strong>Translation:<strong>_

**Gertrud:** What do you want?

**Elsa:** Hi. My name is Elsa Vinter, I am Inga Jensen's daughter… Are you Gertrud Egedal?

**Gertrud:** My goodness…

**Gertrud:** You're looking for your mom…

**Elsa:** Do you know where I can find her?

**Gertrud:** I'm afraid that's not possible. She died of an overdose last year.

**Elsa:** Thank you for the help.


End file.
